X3

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For those without comedic tastes, the self-proclaimed experts at Wikipedia have an article about X3.

X3 is the third movie in the X-Men trilogy. Its subtitles are X-Men: The Last Movie (No Really, We Mean It) and The Wolverine and Storm Smile-Time Variety Hour.

edit X-Plot

This movie follows the daring exploits of the X-Men as they attempt to stop the sentient bacteria that's out to steal their fortune. This sentient bacteria ingenious disguised itself as a mutant cure and intends to infect every sappy weak-willed mutant in the world and drive them mad by showing a repeat loop of Catwoman in their mind. However, Marvel's melancholy mutants are too bright and stubborn to fall for this and instead develop the cunning plan to blow 'em all to hell.

In a back-up sub-plot, in case people didn't care about the first, Jean Grey has returned. Her return has caused unrest amongst the comic-book readers as their forebodings increase and they suspect the incomprehensible hell this is likely to degenerate in to.

edit X-Summary

Jean Grey (Redhead Lezbo) comes out from the deep and makes out with Scott Summers (Mr. Cyclops). The scene ends with the classic scary tune that comes with in every cellphone on the black market. After the scene ends, Jean ate Cyclops and then spat out his sun glasses.

Professor Xavier becomes really upset that Jean is back and silently tried to kill her by a telekinetic brain transplant but wolverine came into the room and Xavier got distracted. Anyhow, Xavier stalks Jean when she was walking home. Xavier played the blinking game with Jean sitting opposite from her while Mr. Magma (Yomammagnito) took a nap. Suddenly he blinked and lost, he got so outraged that he forgot that he was totally crippled from the waist and below. He stood up and Collapsed in front of Jean. Jean got so pissed that she kicked Mr. Xavier in the balls exactly when Wolverine came climbing in through the door (claws up in the roof, his hobby) Xavier saw down on everyone so when he saw Wolverine looking him in the eyes he got so embarrassed that he exploded. So now its the end of the movie, nothing much has happened, only that 5 people + a teenager + a black guy (Hank Mc HEEEEY Macarena) stand against an army of the most superior "special people" Now The teenager called Kitty was to save the Beech and by that prevent Aids from spreading, this was not easy, the giant penis called I-have-no-nuts was hunting her. After many curse words and mild nudity she found him and stabbed him in his heart and everyone lived happily ever after, except the Mormons who was clearly extinguished when Magneto didn't predict the plastic guns that the soldiers used. Quoting Magneto: "In chess you always let the pawns go first, that's why I let the MORMONS go first."

Now when everybody thinks they can leave the 41 minutes of the 1H and 41 min kicks in, a Camera moving slooooowwwllllyyyy around Magneto who had lost his magnetic powers (whoops forgot to tell you) He was playing chess, his index finger pointing at the black colored pawn that looked like a penis. he poked it a few times (39 min to be specific) then he poked it while his other hand bashed the chess board with the left hand so the pawn fell, then the movie ended with an "to-be-continued-maybe" music and with a sex scene that had nothing to do with the movie. If everybody felt like waiting another 41 minutes and putting up with glares from the theater staff, they could stay and watch a short clip after the credits in which Xavier 2.0 had taken control of another body and is kind of alive. Maybe? Smart people just watched it on Youtube.

edit X-Reception

The original script did not include Dr. Hank McCoy. There was supposed to be a Black guy called Jeffery Jones that was a Mutant hater but trouble came when they were to ask Disney for permission to start producing the movie, studio owner Wallace Disney scolded the screenwriters that everybody knows that there are no black people in Disney movies. Disney and the producer compromised that the Black guy could be in the movie, but only if his fur were actually a dark blue.in the Motion picture but ONLY if one color him blue and name him "beast"

If you have ever seen a black guy in a Disney movie, it is actually a white man with a black latex suit.

edit X-Possible X-sequels

The cast and crew insist there is no possibility of any sequels or follow-ups. The directors and producers don't want to make another X-Movie and even if they did, none of the cast would bother to show up. However, it would be called X4: The Glorious Revolution.

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