Worst songs to play at a funeral

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;7. Michael Jackson - Eaten Alive
 
;7. Michael Jackson - Eaten Alive
 
;6. LMFAO - Shots
 
;6. LMFAO - Shots
;5. Emilie Autumn - Dead Is The New Alive
+
;5. Emilie Autumn - The Art of Suicie
 
;4. Emeli Sande - Kill The Boy
 
;4. Emeli Sande - Kill The Boy
 
;3. Cher Lloyd - Swagger Jagger
 
;3. Cher Lloyd - Swagger Jagger

Revision as of 01:21, August 6, 2013

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At funerals the tradition is to play boring opera, some dull classical music, bagpipe music or the occasional ballad. Why is this? Wouldn't the world be a better place if people weren't afraid of blasting out some real music whilst their loved ones are buried. However, there are some times when "crossing the line" becomes clear, and this causes tragedy, horror and cancer. So, for your information, here are the worst 100 songs to play at a funeral.

The List

101 - 91

101. Sammy Hagar - I Can't Drive 55
(If the person died in a car accident while going over 55 mph)
100. AC/DC - Highway To Hell
Funeral
99. Sean Kingston - Fire Burning
(If the person died in a fire)
98. The Munchkins - Ding-Dong! The Witch Is Dead
97. Kanye West - Gold Digger
(If the person married someone rich or Anna Nicole Smith)
96. Jamie Foxx/Glee - Blame It On The Alcohol
95. Diana Vickers - Never Go To Heaven
94. Eamon - F*** You! I Don't Want You Back
93. Wham! - Wake Me Up Before You Go Go
92. Nicole Scherzinger - Don't Hold Your Breath
(If the person died drowning)
91. All American Rejects - Gives You Hell

90 - 81

90. Tomosuke Funaki - 凛として咲く花の如く
(Just don't play it. It's so epic that the dead may rise from their grave)
89. Kool & The Gang - Celebration
88. La Roux - Bulletproof
(If they were shot)
87. Bee Gees - Stayin' Alive
86. The Ting Tings - Shut Up And Let Me Go
(If they were raped)
85. Sophie Ellis-Bextor - Murder On The Dancefloor
84. Rush - High Water
83. Rebecca Black - Friday
(Probably would turn into a double funeral with that song)
82. Roll Deep - Good Times
81. Queen - Another One Bites The Dust

80 - 71

80. Roll Deep - Green Light
(If they were in a car accident)
79. The Cheeky Girls - We Are The Cheeky Girls (Touch My Bum)
78. The Trammps - Disco Inferno
77. Cee Lo Green - F*** You!
76. The Jam - Going Underground
75. Rush - Roll The Bones
74. Rock - I Am Rock
(If the person died because he believes he's an Immortal and got beaten up by a gang of hobos)
73. Usher - Buri
72. Esmee Denters - Outta Here
71. Hollywood Undead - Dead In Ditches

70 - 61

70. Helloween - Get Me Outta Here
69. REM - Try Not To Breathe
68. The Chords - Sh-Boom
(Unfitting to a funeral because it's too DooDoo-wop)
67. La Roux - In For The Kill
66. Diana Vickers - Once
Lyrics: I'm only gonna let you kill me once
65. Lady GaGa - So Happy I Could Die
64. Michael Jackson - Thriller
63. Tahee Cain - Burnin' In The Third Degree
(If the person died of self-immolation)
62. M.I.A - Bird Flu
61. Tinie Tempah ft. Kelly Rowland - Invinsible
(If they were hit by a car)

60 - 51

60. Tinie Tempah - Pass Out
59. James Horner - Come Little Children
(Play this in a funeral and it will result into a fantasy-horror ritual)
58. Missy Elliot - She's A Bitch
57. Olly Murs - Heart Skips A Beat
(Unsuitable if the person died of a heart attack)
56. Aaliyah ft. Missy Elliot - Hot Like Fire
55. R. Kelly - I Believe I Can Fly
(If the person jumped off a building)
54. B.o.B ft. Hayley Williams - Airplane
(I think you would know at who's funeral this would be unsuitable)
53. Britney Spears - Hit Me Baby One More Time
(If attacked or beaten)
52. Bruno Mars - Grenade
(If killed in action or by a jealous lover)
51. Johnny Mandel/Mike Altman- Suicide Is Painless
(If someone wants you to play this song at their funeral, it's time to make them stop watching M*A*S*H)

50 - 41

50. Green Day - Haha Your Dead
49. Iron Maiden - Be Quick Or Be Dead
48. Queen - Who Wants To Live Forever
47. The Lonely Island ft. Akon - I Just Had Sex
(Disrespectful if they died from a sex related disease (HIV, AIDS), or if they didn't)
46. Ice Cube - It Was a Good Day
45. Eminem - 3 a.m.
(Song about recalling a string of murders)
44. Michael Jackson - Beat It
(If they were attacked)
43. Wicked! - Defying Gravity
(If they jumped off a building)
42. Sarah Silverman - Your Gonna Die Soon
41. Dragonforce - Through the Fire and Flames

40 - 31

40. Stevie Wonder - Happy Birthday
39. Good Charlotte - I Just Wanna Live
38. Green Day - F.O.D (Fuck Off and Die)
37. Cutting Crew - (I Just) Died in Your Arms
36. Elton John - Better Off Dead
(Curiously, not performed at Princess Diana's funeral)
35. Achmed the Dead Terrorist - Jingle Bombs
(If they died a terrorist, from a terrorist or from a deadly Christmas event)
34. Selena Gomez - I Don't Miss You At All
33. Rihanna - shut up and drive
(if the person was hit by a car)
32. Jordin Sparks - No Air
31. Chris Brown - Yeah 3x

30 - 21

30. Rihanna - Man Down
29. Scissor Sisters - Don't Feel Like Dancing
28. Lady GaGa - Just Dance
27. Destiny's Child - Survivor
26. Madonna - Die Another Day
25. Chris Brown - Look At Me Now
24. Celine Dion - I Am Alive
23. Genesis - No Reply At All
22. Enrique Iglesias ft. Nicole Scherzinger - Heartbeat
Lyrics: I can feel your heartbeat...
21. Katy Perry - Firework
(If they died in an explosion)

20 - 11

20. 50 Cent - When Death Becomes You
19. Saves The Day - Turning Over In My Tomb
18. Jay-Z - Hard Knock Life (Ghetto Anthem)
(Someone’s going to get teary eyed)
17. Jay-Z - Da Graveyard
16. Frank Klepacki - Hell March 2
(everyone will head bang to this song if this plays loudly in someone's funeral)
15. It's Easy To Sleep When You're Dead - of Montreal
14. Dr Dre ft. Eminem - I Need A Doctor
13. Old People In A Cemetary - of Montreal
12. Tupac - To Live & Die in L.A.
(If they died in L.A.)
11. Tupac - I Don't Give a Fuck

10 - 0

10. The Notorious B.I.G. - Who Shot Ya?
9. The Notorious B.I.G. - Suicidal Thoughts
8. Michael Jackson - They Don't Care About Us
7. Michael Jackson - Eaten Alive
6. LMFAO - Shots
5. Emilie Autumn - The Art of Suicie
4. Emeli Sande - Kill The Boy
3. Cher Lloyd - Swagger Jagger
(Not really to do with death but would be very bad to play at a funeral)
2. Adele - Rolling In The Deep
(If they drowned)
1. Avenged Sevenfold - Buried Alive
(Worst time to play is while the coffin is being lowered)
0. Ozzy Osbourne - Suicide Solution
-1. Gotye feat. Kimbra - Somebody That I Used To Know

Songs that just wouldn't match a funeral mood

Here are some songs which just don't fit into the funeral mood.

Jay-Z ft. Mr Hudson - Forever Young
LMFAO - Sorry for Party Rocking
Cheshyre - The Madness Of The Hatter
Snoop Dogg - Nuthin' but a 'G' Thang
O-Zone - Dragonstea Din Tei (Numa Numa)
Alexis Jordan - Happiness
S.Mouse - Slap My Elbow
Fred - Christmas Cash (or any other song by him)
Plain White T's - Hey There Delilah
Tony Jay - Hellfire
Madness - House Of Fun
Septimus Winner and Richard Milburn - Listen to the Mockingbird
James Brown - I Got You (I Feel Good)
Queen - Don't Stop Me Now
Stinky Wizzleteats - Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy
Britt McKillip - This Day Aria
James Blunt - Beautiful
Axel F - Crazy Frog
Mr Blobby - Mr Blobby
Spice Girls - Wannabe
Ke$ha - We R Who We R
LMFAO - Party Rock Anthem
Skrillex - First Of The Year (Equinox)
Six D - Best Damn Night
Beastie Boys - Fight for the Right to Party
The Firm - Star Trekking across the universe
Design The Skyline - Surrounded By Silence
Daniel Ingram - Smile Smile Smile
Lady GaGa - Paparazzi
KC & The Sunshine Band - That's The Way
Frank Zappa - Why Does It Hurt When I Pee?
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