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See Unified Law of Subsequent Albums for more information on the scientific causes relating to music.

According to Madonna's True Word, the following are the worst 100* songs to get jiggy to. Readers are required to have their condoms to hand.

* Madonna does not care to count this list too closely, as she is too busy stealing African children.

edit The List

121. Jaws Theme - John Williams

edit 120-111

120. "Trololo" - Eduard Khil

119. "O'Children" - Nick Cave

118. "Think I'd Better Leave Right Now" - Will Young

117. "I Love You, You Love Me" - Barney

116. "Stairway to Heaven" - Led Zeppelin

115. "Jizz in My Pants" - The Lonely Island

114. "Keep it on Wax" - Alexisonfire

113. "Bite the Pain" - Death

112. "Tell Slater Not to Wash His Dick" – Bring Me The Horizon

111. "Already Over" -Red

edit 110-101

110. "The Morning After" - Faith No More

109."Best of Both Worlds" - Hannah Montana

108. "Smack My Bitch Up" - The Prodigy

107. "Creep" - Radiohead

106. "Family Guy Theme Song" - Barney

105. "Maneater" - Hall & Oates

104. "How Do You Like Me Now? - Toby Keith

103. "We Don't Have to Take Our Clothes Off" - Jermaine Stewart

102. "Pretty Fly" - The Offspring (Give it to me baby..uh-huh, uh-huh.) I think you get the idea.

101. "We Didn't Start the Fire" - Billy Joel

edit 100-91

100. "Four Sticks" - Led Zeppelin

99. "You Suffer" - Napalm Death

You'd have to be bloody quick to have sex to this!

98. "The Final Contdown" - Europe

97. "Revolution #9" - The Beatles

96. "Bleed it Out" - Linkin Park

I bleed it out, digging deeper just to throw it away, I bleed it out, digging deeper just to throw it away, I bleed it out, digging deeper just to throw it away, just to throw it away, just to throw it away, I bleed it out

95. "A Bitch is a Bitch" - NWA

94. "Take Me Down To Funky Town" - Lipps Inc.

93. "Raining Blood" - Slayer

92. "A Boy Named Sue" - Johnny Cash

91. "Cotton Eye Joe" - Rednex

edit 90-81

90. "Come On Eileen" - Dexys Midnight Runners

89. "Can You Feel It" - The Jacksons

88. "To Rid the Disease" - Opeth

87. "I'll Be There For You" (The Theme Song from Friends) - The Rembrandts

86. "Ring Of Fire" - Johnny Cash

85. "Bone Broke" - The White Stripes

84. "The Hampster Dance" - Hampton the Hamster

83. "Safety Dance" - Men Without Hats

82. "I Want To Break Free" - Queen

81. "Dude Looks Like a Lady" - Aerosmith

edit 80-71

80. "I Hate Everything About You" - Three Days Grace

79. "Surfing Bird" - The Trashmen

78. "The Merry-Go-Round Broke Down" - Cliff Friend and Dave Franklin

77. "Fake It" - Seether

76. "Folsom Prison Blues" - Johnny Cash

75. "I Am The Walrus" - The Beatles

74. "Silent Night"

73. "She'll Be Coming Round The Mountain"

72. "Crazy Bitch" - Buckcherry

71. "It's Raining Men" - The Weather Girls

edit 70-61

70. "Doin' The Mess Around" - Ray Charles

69. "Blue (Da Ba Dee)" - Eiffel 65

68. "Rape Me" - Nirvana

67. "How Could This Happen To Me" - Simple Plan

67. "Who's Your Daddy?" - Toby Keith

66. "I Think I'm Going Bald" - Rush

65. "Dead Bodies Everywhere" - Korn

64. "Who Are You" - The Who

63. "Oh Yeah" - Yello (From Ferris Bueller's Day Off)

62. "Macho Man" - Village People

61. "4'33"" - John Cage

edit 60-51

60. "Heaven Is One Step Away" - Eric Clapton

59. "Impossible Brutality" - Kreator

58. "He's A Radical Rat" - Samuel Asher-Weiss

57. "Excitable Boy" - Warren Zevon

56. "Sex, Murder, Art." - Slayer

55. "Phoenix (Basement Jaxx Remix)" - Daft Punk

54. "Who Wants To Live Forever" - Queen

53. "Pain" - Three Days Grace

52. "She's Got Balls" - AC/DC

51. "Only The Young" - Journey

edit 50-41

50. "Strange Brew" - Cream

49. "It Don't Come Easy" - Ringo Starr

48. "Rock You Like a Hurricane" - The Scorpions

47. "I Ain't The One" - Lynyrd Skynyrd

46. "Cold As Ice" - Foreigner

45. "So Into You" - Atlanta Rhythm Section

44. "Party Boy Theme Song" from Jackass

43. "Remember Tomorrow" - Iron Maiden

42. "I Cum Blood" - Cannibal Corpse

41. "The Camera Eye" - Rush

edit 40-31

40. "They're Gonna Taste Great" - Kellogs Frosties

39. "Old Man" - Neil Young

38. "Touch Me" - The Doors

37. "Fucked to Death" - Devourment

36. "For My Father" - Andy Mckee

35. "Pull the Plug" - Death

34. "The Bad Touch" - The Bloodhound Gang

33. "Chainsaw Gutsfuck" - Mayhem

32. "U Can't Touch This" - MC Hammer

31. "Virus Alert" - Weird Al Yankovic

edit 30-21

30. "Bitch I'll Kill Ya" - Yung Dum Basturd

29."Land Down Under" - Men At Work

28. "Abducted" - Hypocrisy

27. "Strangers Like Me" - Phil Collins

26. "Monochromatic Stains" - Dark Tranquillity

25. "Taste My..." - Chimaira

24. "Die By the Sword" - Slayer

23. "Raped By The Light Of Christ" - At The Gates

22. "Coerced Coexistence" - In Flames

21. "Fuck Her Gently" - Tenacious D

edit 20-11

20. "Don't Stand So Close To Me" - The Police

19. "Breaking Up Is Hard Do Do" - Neil Sedaka

18. "Somebody's Watching Me" - Rockwell

17. "I Get Around" - The Beach Boys

16. "April Come She Will" - Simon & Garfunkel

(especially if it's February)

15. "She Hates Me" - Puddle of Mudd

14. "Why Don't We Do It In The Road" - The Beatles

13. "Relax" - Frankie Goes To Hollywood

12. "Satisfaction" - (The Residents cover. The original Rolling Stones version is fine.)

11. "Peanut Butter Jelly Time"

edit 10-1

10 "Violent Pornography" - System of a Down (unless your in to that thing)

9. "Stop" - Pink Floyd

8. "Achy Breaky Heart" - Billy Ray Cyrus

7. "Loser" - Beck

6. "I Touch Myself" - Madonna

5. "Doing Alright With The Boys" - Gary Glitter

4. "Spongebob Squarepants Theme Song" - Weird Al Yankovic

3. "Never Gonna Give You Up" - Rick Astley

2. "Distant Early Warning" - Rush

1. "Here Comes the Bride"

0. "I'm Coming Out" - Diana Ross

Special Addition All Time Song You're Never Supposed to Have Sex To:

"You Keep Me Hangin' On!" - Diana Ross and the Supremes