Worst 100 Songs Referencing Paedophilia

According to God's True Word, the following are the worst 100* Songs referencing paedophilia ever made. Readers are required to have their sporks to hand.

The All-Time 100 (or so) Worst:
100	April Fools Jokes
99	Creatures to have sex with
98	Firefox extensions
97	Foods
96	Gifts to give a friend
95	Harry Potter Spin-offs
94	Inventions
93	Locations
92	LOL Cats
91	Make Out Songs
90	Moments to get a Boner
89	Moments to Laugh
88	Money Making Schemes
87	Movies
86	Nonexistent Words
85	Not In The Least Bit Sexual Things To Do With No Pants On
84	Nutty Conspiracy Theories
83	Overused Star Trek Episode Plots
82	Pick-up lines
81	Pokemon Cash-Ins
80	Porn Stars
79	Quick Detections that an Uncyclopedia page sucks
78	Reasons to become a Christian
77	Reflections on 2005
76	Reflections on 2006
75	Reflections on 2007
74	Reflections on 2008
73	Reflections on 2009
72	Reflections on 2010
71	Reflections on 2011
70	Reflections on 2012
69	Reflections on 2013
68	Rejected Harry Potter Novels
67	Remakes
66	Restaurants
65	Self Help Books
64	Sequels
63	Sexual Perversions
62	Short Poems
61	Sitcom Catchphrases
60	Songs
59	Songs about Seagulling
58	Songs Referencing Paedophilia
57	Songs To Have Sex To
56	Songs To Play At A Funeral
55	Spinoffs
54	Superheroes
53	Things About the '00s
52	Things Rick Astley is Never Gonna Do
51	Things to do during Christmas
50	Things to Put In An IV
49	Things To Say In Court
48	Things to Say in the Workplace
47	Things to say on a First Date
46	Toys
45	TV Programs
44	Uncyclopedia In-Jokes
43	Video Games of all time‎
42	Video Game Movies
41	Video Game Systems
40	Ways of Being a Dick
39	Ways To Be Castrated
38	Ways to be Circumcized
37	Ways to Deliver Bad News
36	Ways to Die (Best)
35	Ways to Die (Worst)
34	Ways to Kill Sarah Connor
33	Ways to Start a Novel
32	Ways to Win an Argument
31	Weapons
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Top Ten

100. "Two Little Boys"

- Antipodean bedtime classic from Rolf Harris.

99. " Little Girls"

- Oingo Boing.

98. "Girl, You'll be a Woman, Soon"

- Neil Diamond.

97. "Hot for Teacher"

- Van Halen recount their childhood memories.

96. "The Kids Are Alright"

- Pete Townsend and friends, remembered for the infamous accompanying videos.

95. "Sweet Child O' Mine"

- Guns N' Roses.

94. "Strange Little Girl"

- The Stranglers.

93. "I Got You Babe"

- Cher.

92. "Thriller"

- Michael Jackson. Just because.

91. "Thank Heaven for Little Girls"

- Charles Hasnovoice. Gallic lover of le petit femme.

90. "Good Morning Little Schoolgirl"

- Sonny Boy Williamson. Seriously.

Bottom 20

89. "All The Young girls Love Alice"

- Elton John. And Alice loves them back. Now she's in Wonderland...

88. "Rock Your Baby"

- George McCrae.

87. "Last Child"

- Aerosmith

86. "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star"

- yeah, let's just say in the original it fuckin' well weren't a star what was getting 'twinkled'.

85. "Hot Child In The City"

- Nick Gilder -Not only does this seem to be about an underage whore, but the name Nick Gilder sounds like someone who'd be looking for underage whores!

84. "Sweet 17"

- The Babys - "She's got a mouth full of sticky stuff"

83. "You Don't Have To Be Old To Be Wise"

- Judas Priest - Especially wrong when sang by a (gay) man completely dressed in leather!

82. "Wrong Way"

- Sublime - Lovely song about an obsession with a 15 year old hooker

81. "When I saw her standing there"

- The Beatles - She was just seventeen, eh?

80. "Christine"

- KISS - Just '16' hum Ace??

Bottom 70

79. Strokin' - Clearance Carter

78. "Aqualung"

- Jethro Tull - Creepy Bum with a snottynose eying little girls with bad intent?

77. "I Kissed a Girl"

- Katy Perry - Katy Perry reveals her obsession with little girls.

76. "Cherry Man"

- The Wannadies - You have to see the video to fully understand.

75. "Love Child"

Deep Purple

74. "Save All Your Kisses For Me"

Some crappy seventies band who won at Eurovision with this. It ain't just kisses, pal...

73. "Throwaway Children"

Dio. "I'll keep you safe and warm, words she needs to hear - what they really mean is no more... little girl..." Scary!

71. "House of 1000 Voices"

Candlemass. Infanticide and other unnamed horrors, but we can guess mwhahahaha!!!!!

70. "Child"

Free. Bondage, paedophilia... AAARGH!

Top Sixty

69. "What's Your Name"

Lynyrd Skynyrd.

68. "Who are you?"

The Who....'well I really wanna know!' (actual lyrics)

67. "Rock the Cradle of Love"

- Billy Idol.

66. "Thank Heaven for Little Girls"

Savage Edge

65. All the Girls Love Alice - "But what do you expect from a chick who's just sixteen, And hey, hey, hey, you know what I mean"

64. Another Brick in the Wall - "Hey, Teacher, Leave them kids alone!"

63. I Saw Her Standing There - "Well, she was just 17, You know what I mean."

62. 5:15 by the Who - "Girls of fifteen, sexually knowing, the ushers are sniffing, eau-de-cologning"

61. Make It Hot - Nicole Wray

60. Top Jimmy - Van Halen

Top Bottom 50

59. Is It Love - Pink

58. Daddy - Korn

57. Luca - Suzanne Vega (very bad)

56. Cosmia - Joanna Newsom

55. Down With The Sickness - Disturbed paedophilia...AAA!

54. Concrete Angel - Martina McBride paedophilia...ugh.

53. Try The Little Girl - John Michael Montgomery (Christian view point)

52. Seventeen - Nicole Wray (She was just 17, You all know what I mean.)

51. "Do You Wanna Touch Me? - Gary Glitter (Do I not want to? Let me see…)

50. Art Lover - Lambchop (achieve or avoid)

Top 40

49. Mona Lisa - Slick Rick (mmm…)

48. "Baby It's Cold Outside" - Dean Martin & Doris Day (UGH!!)

47. "Summer Nights" - Olivia Newton John & John Travolta (Musicals are zany like that.)

46. "Brown Sugar" - Rolling Stones

45. "Father Figure" - George Michael (So that's off putting.)

44. "Maggie May" - Rod Stewart (Who knows why Rod Stewart does anything?)

43. "My Sharona" - The Knack

42. "Young Girl" - Gary Puckett

41. "Possession" - Sarah McLachlan

40. Work It - Missy Elliot

Top 30

39. Date Rape - Sublime

38. Urge To Kill

37. Parents Just Don't Understand - DJ Jazzy Jeff and The Fresh Prince (Sure, sure.)

36. Cherry Pie - Warrant

35. I Love Rock N' Roll - Joan Jett (We do too!)

34. Sweet Little Sixteen - Chuck Berry (She was just sixteen, eh?)

33. Into The Night - Benny Mardones

32. KKK Bitch - Body Count (Ice-T alludes to falling in love with Tipper Gore's two 12-year-old nieces.)

31. "Redemption Song" - Bob Marley

30. "Hungry Eyes" - Eric Carmen

Top 20

29. Lonesome Organist Rapes Page Turner - The Dresden Dolls (They wouldn't still be in contact if she had told anyone about the things that they'd done)

28. Claire - Gilbert O'Sullivan (incest)

27. Killer Eyes - The Kinks

26. Crazy - Patsy Cline (Freaky in a psychiatric way!)

25. Orgasm Addict - Buzzcocks

24. "Like a Virgin"

23. "Altered Boy" - Exodus (Speaks against sexual abuse.)

22. "Amy in the White Coat" - Bright Eyes

21. "Babysitter" - Morningwood (She should not be allowed to babysit.)

20. "Bad Reputation" - Luke Haines (About Gary Glitter a former pop star who was convicted of sexually abusing minors.)

Bottom Top 10

19. "The Ballad of Jesus" - Messiah

18. "Young Boys" - Lords of Acid

17. "Uncle Salty" - Aerosmith

16. Tier - Rammstein

15. "Sullen Girl" - Fiona Apple

14. "Speak" - Greg Winkler

13. "A Question of Time" - Depeche Mode

12. "Prison Sex" - Tool

11. "Nieces' Pieces" - Xiu Xiu

Bottom Ten

10. "Necropedophile" - Cannibal Corpse (Sick just sick!)

9. "Panty Shot" - Mindless Self Indulgence

8."Brenda's Got a Baby" - 2pac

7."Alive" - Pearl Jam

6. "Cherry Lips" - Garbage

5. "Fixxxer" - Metallica

4. "Janie's Got a Gun" - Aerosmith

3. "Lolita" - Suzanne Vega

2. "Devil in a midnight mass"

Billy Talent. It is actually about paedophilia. A Paedophiliac priest.

1. "Mr. Tinkertrain"

Ozzy Osbourne. It is actually about paedophilia, and I only listened to it once and then had to have counselling...