Worst 100 Planets of All Time

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According to God and Xenu's true word these are the worst planets in the entire Universe. These are the planets God has either forgotten, doesnt care about anymore, or is against them.

[edit] 100-91

A picture of Mars. NASA spent billions of dollars to research it, and found that there are possibly deposits of ice on this planet.

A picture of Viagra VI taken from space.

100. Jay Leno's Chin

Did you see this, did you hear about this?

99. Slash

The emo planet. On this planet, the skies are constantly gray, with starlight being blocked by the clouds of tears in the atmosphere. Nobody cares about this planet.

98. Conservaplanet

This planet was settled by a group of conservatives who separated themselves from the liberal bias of the mainstream universe.

97. Mars

This once thriving planet teeming with life is nothing more than a cold barren desert.

96. Planet AAAAAA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

95. Hell

A hot planet of eternal punishment.

94. The Planet of Nihilism

Where life is about nothing. Just like "Seinfeld".

93. Planet Solipsism

Only one real person lives on this planet. Everything and everyone else is just a hallucination caused by atmospheric gases.

92. Viagra VI

Due to a rare type of radiation in the atmosphere, all guys on this planet experience a constant erection. This can unfortunatelly lead to problems.

91. Wilde VIII

Founded for Oscar Wilde. Oscar Wilde quotes can be heard and found everywhere on this planet.

[edit] 90-81

Planet Wikipedia's views on education are summarized in this statement.

These aliens live on Pizza Planet.

90. Planet Hollywood

Which, instead of revolving around a sun, revolves around Miley Cyrus's ego.

89. Planet Wikipedia

The planet that anybody can change or destroy.

88. Omicron Persei VIII

Home of Lrrr, that weird alien who appears on Futurama sometimes.

87. Pizza Planet

“They eat pizza on this planet.”

~ Captain Obvious on Pizza Planet

86. Pluto

Which is not a planet. I just wanted to waste a point on this countdown. Yeah, I'm lazy like that.

85. Mercury

Which has nothing to do with the periodic element or the lead singer of Queen. Although the article says otherwise.

84. Darwin IV

“Screw you. God created humans, we were never monkeys. Except for black people.”

~ Some racist Republican (Congress is full of them) on Darwin IV

84. Planet Kanye

The planet full of people with big egos, gay fish, and presidents who don't care about black people.

83. Planet of the Apes

Even gun freak Charlton Heston couldn't protect this planet from being taken over by a bunch of primates. They even moved the Statue of Liberty from New York City to some beach.

82. Planet Marklar

Where every marklar, marklar, and marklar is referred to as "Marklar". Recently accepted several starving marklars from Marklar who were trying to escape Catholic marklars from the United Marklars of Marklar.

81. Planet Drew Carey

Where the points don't matter. Yes, the points are just like the food at Hooters. They don't matter.

[edit] 80-71

80. Planet Bolton

The only way to tolerate living on this planet is if you're deaf.

79. Alderaan

Asploded by the Dark Side in 1977.

78. New Moon

Home to a bunch of teenage girls who won't shut up about the relationship between Edward and Bella, two people who drink blood. Please remember that nobody cares about the relationship between Edward and Bella.

77. Yaz

Not to be confused with that guy who played for the Red Sox, that birth control pill, or that band from the 80s nobody remembers.

76. New Jersey

New Jersey is its own world. Fughetabahtit!

75. Qwertyuiopia

The Woodstock planet.

74. Uranus

I know what you think I'm going to say, but I'm not saying it. If only I had a nickel for every time I've heard some douchebag trying to be funny use a "Uranus" joke.

73. Planet Springer

All residents have beer cans and car parts scattered across their front yards.

72. Planet Smirnoff

Where the air can't breathe YOU!

71. Oprah's Ass

Currently has two known moons named Steadmann and Dr. Phil.

[edit] 70-61

70. Venus

Extraterrestrial life on Venus was first spoken of by the musical prophets collectively known as Bananarama in 1986.

69. Planet Fisher Price

Where all fuckers are required by law to eat shit.

68. Magrathea

“Magrathea!”

~ Zaphod Beeblebrox on the location of Magrathea

67. Vulcan

Live long and prosper. Just don't seduce too many green women.

66. Planet Two Cows

Where you have two cows.

65. Jupiter

“Jupiter!”

~ That one character from All That that Kel Mitchell played whose name I can't remember on Jupiter

64. Planet Quayle

Where "potato" is spelled with an e.

63. Planet Dennis Miller

Just like Columbus's journey to the New World and Edmund Hillary's trek, nobody can get to this planet. Like the Gobi, there is no water. And the natives are all strange, much like the characters in the works of Jonathan Swift.

62. Planet Your Mom

She weighs as much as a planet.