Worst 100 Movies of All Time

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According to God's True Word, the following are the worst 100* movies ever made. Readers are required to have their sporks to hand.(or something sharp...)

* God does not care to count this list too closely, and believers are wise not to criticise divine numeration policy.

Contents 1 Theological Studies into Suckiness Quotient 2 The List 2.1 Positive Infinity 2.2 100+ to 98½ 2.3 97 to 87.764268895 2.4 87 to 78 2.5 77 2.6 76 to 60 2.7 59 to 43 2.8 43 to 18 2.9 17 to Pi 2.10 The top 10 (kind of) 2.11 0 to Negative infinity 3 Honorable (Not-So-Horrible) Mentions

[edit] Theological Studies into Suckiness Quotient

Many have tried to decode God's vision, and from that the true meaning of his teachings on earth, by studying this list of terrible movies. While this has been hotly debated throughout the last 30 years by theologians of all denominations, a few incontestable patterns have emerged:

• Vin Diesel can dramatically increase the suckiness quotient of a movie
• Uwe Boll automatically increases the suckiness quotient of a movie as well
• Nicholas Cage can do something surprisingly similar.
• Lack of Nudity seems to be regarded by God as a sign of a bad movie, not so much in a movie where the main character appears to be slutty, as it would just be regarded as mildly disappointing, but in particular in movies where the main lead is hot, yet sensible, and "wouldn't normally do that kind of thing". When it's proven that he/she doesn't actually do that kind of thing, the sense of disappointment and frustration can be intense.
• Funny Animals are a paradox; although they can increase the suckiness of most movies, as the level of Lack of Nudity increases the level of suckiness from Funny Animals ceases to become a primary factor: the negative effects from this become negated themselves.
• Any film in which Rutger Hauer or Clint Eastwood appears does not suck. Period.

This may be best explained by the graph on the right.

[edit] The List

[edit] Positive Infinity

infinity + 2. War on Terror: The Musical!!

(iran) The Musical where everyone can sing and dance along with Osama Bin Laden and Bush in a war. Fun for all the family.

Infinity + 1. 12 Monkeys: Monkeys Die Harder

(USA 19XX) Bruce Willis plays the role of time traveling ex-Detroit police officer, John McClain , fighting against a Neo-Nazi Environmentalist Apocalyptic terrorist organization hell-bent on releasing infected zoo animals.

This all happened after he spanked them (hence the title).

Infinity. Honey I Shrunk the Kids MVXII: The Divorce A family favorite 

)

[edit] 100+ to 98½

1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000. Dragon Wars

This movie does not actually belong on this list, as it has been universally declared by everyone who does not want their family kidnapped by a Korean Dictator to be the best movie ever made.

9001. Dragon BallZ

Goku and co. set out to find the lost dragon balls with star tatoos on them so the dragon can have sex again! And remember ITS OVER 9000!!!!!!!!

999. Batman Begins

(see the article)

999. Batman Ends

Batman's wings are torn off in a fight with some vampire bats over some fruit and he gets sent to Arkham Asylum where he gets teased by the Joker!

998. Alien Vs Perdita

ET invades 101 Dalmatians and squares off against Pongo's bitch.

777. Schindler's House Party

Oskar Schindler(Ryan Reynolds) and Amon Goth(Jude Law) team up to bed every girl on a list 1000 women who dig guys in Nazi uniforms. Shower scenes aplenty. Later spawned a sequel though no ever really talks about it.

668. Oh Noes I Iz Teh Suxxorz!!!

Man wakes up to find out he has turned into a giant cockroach with a giant cock. Duration: 3 minutes.

666. Satan Claus: A Christmas Adventure

Merry Christmas, Satan, and make sure you kill or molest the children on December 25, 1:00 am. Ho ho hoes!

500. Duncan vs Predator

You compare a 17-year old juvenile to a predator. We're still going to lose.

450. Zelda: The Movie

Like Lord of the Rings with a stupid hat on. It also has more giant spiders, a stupid hat, really screwed-up blobs of jelly that electrocute people, a stupid hat, and people using gems like money. Did I mention the stupid hat? Unless you've seen it you really can't grasp just how stupid this hat is. Man...

425. Back To The Future (Part XLV)

Marty and Doc go back in time, before Marty had kids,to stop this dreadful thing from happening. Marty then gets stuck in 1985, and has to get back to 2009. Basically the same storyline as all the others.

400. Istanbul 2005

A film based on Liverpool winning the Champions League a few years ago, staring Jason Stanham as Jamie Carragher, Brad Pitt as Stevie G, Sean Penn as the retarded Polish goalie, Ivan Drago as Andriy Shevchenko, Robert DeNiro as Liverpool's obese manager and the guy who played Apollo Creed as Kaka. Cue over-the-top half time speeches inter-cut with clips of the Milan players being brutally raped at half time in the stadium car park at the hands of sadistic Liverpool Chief Executive Charles Manson.

333. Fast and the Furious: Vatican City Drift

(USA/Italy, 2012) A film with the pope as a pimp in a race. Vin Diesel gets the role once again, and this time, <insert name here> can be in it.

300. SPARTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

(Greece, 2009) And it keeps on going.

242. Football Lesbians

A film about a... well this sucks!

222. Robocrap

A piece of shit that is badly mauled and almost killed by dung beetles is turned into a cyborg policeman.

220. The Wind in the Willows

It's got a talking frog! He's really annoying!

219. Dat Wind in dem Willows Bro

The 'modern' version of the Wind in the Willows. Still has an annoying frog but this time he's a Jewish Rapper.

146+55.121. The Black Screen.

200. The Fast and the Furious- Manila Drift

More drift racing, except this time, it's set in Manila. Complete with three Jeepneys, some guy goes to Manila and did drift racing under heavy traffic and unmade roads.

199. Dennis Furgeson: the movie!

This movie is seriously fucked up. Almost all the scenes are kiddie rape scenes. Makes you throw up upon viewing.

149. El Burro ataca por Detroit 4: Citizen Burro

Considered the best movie ever to come from San Vicente Chicoloapan, Estado de México and done on a shoestring budget as a vehicle for local deputy's girlfriend Coralia Magali Xiomara María de Lourdes Consuelo San Ramón de la Garza y Garza Díaz de Bonilla Treviño de la Fuente. The previous three installments of El Burro Ataca por Detroit were a moderate success in the soft porn/horror/romantic comedy market, but this fourth episode tried to enter the arena of political commentary with disastrous results.

148. Cube 3: Bigger Cube

Sci-Fi/Horror/Teenage-Angst/Comedy film about 12472 people trapped inside a cube-shaped prison.

147. The Dicker Man

Comedy Starring Nicholas Cage as a man with an extremely tiny penis who goes to a small island populated by hard working lesbian bee keepers. Based on a true story.

146. To Love and Die in Armenia

2 people won't survive, okay?

145. Ed Gein 7

Regeined..Again  : Really? Regeined again?....ughhhhh!

144. 2001: A Space Oddesy 

Get over it, NASA.

143. Speed Rape 

The beautiful story of a mad 57 year old, who runs into people then rapes them while they are stunned. This film was rated Uc, because it was particually good rape eduacation for children.

141.375683 and 3 quarters. Josef fritzel: The Movie!

The sequel to Dennis Ferguson: the Movie!. The protaganist, Josef locks his mum in the attic and revenge rapes her because he was having his period at the time. Ss the plot progresses Josef's mother dies and Josef begins to cut himself because he has no one to rape anymore. He eventually adopted a daughter and then came up with a brilliant idea. Imprison her in the basement and rape her as much as possible. The movie concludes with the police finally find the daughter bound to a pipe and bleeding from her ass. Josef gets mad and attackes them with his big blue folder of doom but he is arrested regardless. 2 days later the daughter dies from AIDS

142. Two Thousand Leagues Under the Pee 

You wish you were there.

141. Queef 7: Queefs Unite 

A story surrounding a beautiful bisexual transvestite, who just can't seem to find "the one."

When all of the sudden, a wave of rutheless vaginal farts (queefs) capture her and hold her hostage. Since she has no friends, nobody cares enough to come save her. She gets queefed to death.

140. One Flew Over the Big Bird's Nest 

Artie ("the strongest man in the world") plays a mentally challenged person who excapes jail time by attempting to jump over Sesame Street. Ernie is persuaded by Artie to gamble, who later murders Bert in order to dodge payment.

139. Mr Keating Goes To France 

Mr Keating Goes To France is a low-budget sequel to acclaimed science fiction film Dead Poets Society, the movie that bored several thousand schoolchildren to tears on its first screening. In order to alleviate this, Mr Keating Goes To France basically spliced new footage of Robin Williams running around Paris stealing bicycles to flashbacks to the first movie, overdubbed by Williams in silly high voices. Although critically praised for the astounding special effects made for the scene in which Williams runs through Paris naked, it was a financial failure.

138. Salespitch 

Christopher Guest ("A Mighty Wind", "Best In Show") directs this pseudo-documentary about the visitors to a regional sales conference of door-to-door vacuum-cleaner salesmen.

137. Willie Wanker's Chocolate Factory 

A movie based on a real life story of a man who uses chocolate to exploit little children, whilst wanking frequently throughout the entire length of the movie.

136. The History of Everything Unabridged: A Documentary 

You start with nothing, and then... 9 billion years later OH MY GOD! AN ATOM IS THERE!... oh wait, that's just a speck of dust on the movie screen...

135. M*A*S*H: The Movie Based On The TV Show Based On The Movie Based On The Book Based On The Korean War 

(Korea, but actually filmed in USA, 2006) With Jessica Simpson as Hotlips Houlihan and Oscar Wilde as Maxwell Klinger.

134. It's a Wonderful Life: Director's Cut 

(USA, 1947) The rarely seen version in which Jimmy Stewart is visited by a Hell's Angel, Clarence, who shows him how much better everybody's life would have been if he hadn't made this film. Contains the deleted scene in which Stewart uses a Tommy Gun on the entire town. Hilarity ensues.

133. 1492: A Spice Odyssey 

(USA/Spain/Bahamas/Space, 1992) Christopher Columbus travels through space only to discover pepper, cinnamon and nutmeg.

133.5. 1492: A Spice Channel Odyssey 

(USA, cable, 1993) Chris travels on a spaceship only to discover Pepper, Cinnamon, and Meg are all willing to give him a blowjob.

133.55. 2001: A Spice Odyssey 

(USA, 2001) The Spice Girls go to space n' shit

132. The Beatletrix 

(USA, 1999) John, Paul, Ringo and George discover that the world that they live in is an illusion. Then they meet Trinity, Morpheus and Neo and fall in love. (Yeah, Paul falls in love with Neo, John with Morpheus and George with Trinity. Who does that leave for Ringo? The Architect? Or Brian Epstein?) Trinity, Neo and the Beatles fight the machines who have created this false world... and wear odd leather clothes and cool sunnies and play Beatle songs.

131. Finally, Final Destination 25.1 

(Hell, 2010) Someone thought it would be a good idea to keep on remaking these movies. Actually this idea seemed so perfect that they kept remaking their own movies. Surprisingly, the plot still hasn't changed since the first one. However, you can see heads get ripped off and body parts flying around. Lots of drugs, beer, sex, violence, language, and Al Gore. You can see senators and congressmen get drunk and act like morons (yes, more moronic than they usually do), get high, get their heads chopped off, their spleens yanked out and their esophagus ripped out and stuck up their ass, and hear the Democrats say "fuck this!" every thirty seconds, not to mention hordes of naked congresswomen running around and jumping in bed with the first cute Republican who comes along. The best part is the words that scroll up the screen towards the end of the movie. Although it is terribly hard to read these words, they are, by far, the high point of the film.

131.5. 2 Fast 2 Furious 2 

2 men, 2 cars and 2 tracks. Fun for all of those with '2' fetishes.

130. Sexy Submarine 

(USA, 1968) The Beatles travel by yellow submarine to Pepperland to stop the Blue Meanies from conquering the entire world. Also, Ringo fancies John, John and Paul make love (and lose their clothes) in a tree (and on the submarine!), Paul wants to get in George's trousers, and George is the film's only heterosexual.

129. Beatleback Mountain 

(US, 2007) A tender, bittersweet drama film asbout the secret romance and lust between John Lennon and Paul McCartney. Contains rude nude scenes with Johnny and Macca. Nice. Not!!

128. It's a Sad, Sad, Sad, Sad World 

(USA, 2000) Five emo punks are in a rush to go donate money to the founder of emo. Marilyn Manson directs this classic work of cra.. art!! ART. Bound to make people leave theaters with smiles turned upside down!

127. Citizen Kane 2: Citizen Kaner 

(Vatican City, 20012) Kane (Martin Lawrence) is resurrected by mad scientists desperate to know what the fuck 'Rosebud' is. When he tells them it's the Sims 1 money cheat they bury him next to Orson Wells.

126. The Tony Blair Witch Project 

(Canada, 2002) Boring thriller in which teenagers pursue an elusive prime minister. No one bothered to go see it, so there's no summary here.

125. 23: the Move-E 

(South Dakota, 2009) With the help of Martin Luther Bling, a fictional character not referring to any other existing or non-existing person, Michael Jordan (Michael Jordan), and LeBron James (LeBron James) fight against crime, to ultimately destroy the master of all (white) evil: Guy Titty. The computer game with the same name became rather popular, and actually was rather good. Even though the movie wasn't that bad, director Steven Spielberg always denied he had directed the movie, or even came up with the story.

124. My Big Fat Elf Wedding 

(Middle Earth, 2006) See the Lord of the Rings through the eyes of Arwen as she ponders a different kind of ring: a wedding ring! Watch the hilarious pratfalls as her father Elrond realises his new son-in-law is not only 2000 years Arwen's junior and of a different species, but he also has a dodgy beard! As the big day finally arrives, as Arwen ponders: will her fiancé make it to the wedding on time, or will he be hacked to pieces by hundreds of Orcs and his head put atop a spike on the Dark Tower?

123. Godot! 

(USA, England, 1983) Michael Bay's action comedy adaptation of Samuel Beckett's classic existentialist play. Stars Eddie Murphy as Ray Vladimir, Martin Lawrence as Charles "Chuckie" Estragon and John Lithgow as Robert Godot.

122. Scooby-Doo Meets Cheech and Chong 

(USA 2007) Scooby and the gang have to investigate Cheech and Chong's stash to make sure there are no ghosts. Shaggy, Scooby, Cheech and Chong always get the munchies. Despite the title characters, there are absolutely NO drug references in this entire movie, probably to keep it kid friendly.

121 and a third. Brokenback Mountain 

(USA, 1995) Christopher Reeve takes horseriding lessons. You can guess the rest

121. 9/11, The Musical!! 

(Borneo, 2005) It's all political hijinks, scandals, betrayal, rigging of elections, drug operations, national coverups, and war until someone chokes on a pretzel! Join us on this hilarious ride through America's best (or worst) political crisis! Featuring an Oscar-nominated score by Andrew Lloyd Webber.

120. El Hombre Transformado, La Película 

(Philippines, 1971) The Spanish version of William Shatner's theatrical musical interpretation of his highly acclaimed recording "The Transformed Man" fared much better than it did in English-speaking countries. This version includes a controversial scene in which an army of babies riding dogs pillages a small French town.

119. OMG Sharkz! 

(Canada, 1997) Canada's first major motion picture release was a black-and-white silent film featuring Ashlee Simpson and Lindsay Lohan fighting for survival against a deadly mechanical shark. The dialogue captions are entirely in Internet-speak.

118. OMGWTFLOLBBQ Sharkz! 

(Canadia, 1993) In this less-popular sequel, Ashlee's sister Jessica Simpson discovers the horrifying secret that the mechanical shark is really chicken. The climactic scene is said to be the inspiration for Charlton Heston's infamous Soylent Green line.

117. 1000 Explosions and a Supernova 

(China, 2101) At least the effects were good.

116. The Fast and the Bi-Curious 

(USA, Germany, 2001) Vin Diesel goes to college and explores his sexuality.

115. Joey Tribbiani at Large! 

(Argentina, UK, USA, Germany, Italy, France, Singapur, Uruguay, 2006) Matt Le Blanc in another hilarious adventure of his only and most remembered character.

114. The Texas Chainsaw Messenger 

(France, 1999) Luc Besson's long awaited epic, starring Milla Jovovich as Joan of Arc, who fights the English armies invading Texas by dismembering them with chainsaws. Dustin Hoffman provides comic relief as Pepe, Joan's wisecracking monkey sidekick.

113. Slow Girls 

(USA, 1983) Elizabeth Berkley stars as a one-legged dancer trying to make it in the Las Vegas Theatre for the Mentally Handicapped.

112. QBASIC Instinct 

(USA, 1983) An erotic thriller in which Michael Douglas has to unravel a tangled web of GOTO's spun by a sexy programmer.

111.1. Shining 

(USA, 1980) A heart-warming family comedy about Jack and Wendy Torrance, and their 'special' son Danny. It is set during a winter trip to a log cabin which shows them the true meaning of family. See the trailer here: [1]

111. The Butterfly Affair 

(USA, 1978) Ashton Kutcher deals with American 1950's prejudice as he engages in a passionate cross species love affair with a butterfly, played by Pierce Brosnan. Based on a true story.

110. Free Willis 

(USA, 1992) Bruce Willis is caught and placed in a marina to perform tricks for tourists. A street kid befriends him and when the kid learns that Willis is to be killed, he risks everything to return him to his natural habitat.

109. Deuce Bigalow, African Gigolo 

(USA, 2007) Humourous sex-romp in African jungle turns tragic when main character finds he has AIDS.

108. Gonad, the Big Hairy One 

(USA, 1982) Arnold Schwarzenegger's big break, sees the beefy beefcake playing a monosyllabic loincloth wearing barbarian and tobacco salesman in this romantic comedy from Dino De Lasaurus.

107. Dude, Where's My Time Machine? 

(USA, 2005) Ashton Kutcher and Oscar Wilde join together to help Kutcher find his lost Time Machine. Thus ensues a hilarious mad-cap adventure, culminating with them finding the machine, and Kutcher travelling back in time to prevent the production of the original film in an attempt to salvage his career. Famous lines from this film include "I may be lying in the gutter...but that movie sucked" and "People who are dull at breakfast...are called Ashton Kutcher" Includes a role from K-9, that sellout from Doctor Who.

106. Pitch Black Knight 

(USA, 2006) Martin Lawrence uses black stereotypes to travel forward in time to stop a criminal performance by Vin Diesel. Dame Judy Dench cameos as the same sort of character she normally plays.

105. Podcast Away 

(USA, 2002) A man stuck on a desert Island vents his frustration after his iPod battery refuses to hold a charge.

104. Runaway Pride 

(USA, 1999) A reporter (Richard Gay, star of "Crouching Actor, Hidden Hamster") is assigned to write a story about a woman (Julia Robber) who has left all her acting skills at home. Stand-alone sequel to "Ugly Bitch" (USA, 1990).

103. Jurassic Park XII 

Taking brand stretching to new extremes, "Jurassic Park 12 - Day of the Dodo" followed the exact same pattern as all of Michael Crichton's books. Sean Connery was paid in excess of £12.50 for his role as the voice of "the Dodo", whilst the advanced animatronics and sock puppetry of the previous eleven films in the series had given way to Japanese influence, been replaced with a man in a large suit. The film soundtrack was produced by WLCP.

102. Plan 9 from Manos The Hands of the Incredible Creatures That Stopped Living and Became Mixed Up Cannibal Holocausts: The Musical Part II: Your mom ate my dog 

(New Zanzibar, 2009) One independent filmmaker's quest to film the most original movie ever goes fatally wrong. Check out the DTS DVD edition for that surround-sound bone-crunching moment. Appearing soon on mystery science theatre 3000!

101. Vodka Fantasy: The Spirits Within 

(USA, 2007) Features footage of CGI people drinking actual alcohol. A dramatic failure.

100. Blood Rain 

(USA, 2006) This is a film about Rayne, a damn-peer (half vampire, half honky) who, after being told for the 666th consecutive time on Maury Povich that "This man is not your baby's daddy" found herself cursed to an eternity of bloody urinary tract infections. Seeking to exact revenge upon a cruel world that seduced her into the dark world of drunken sex with married men on welfare, she decides to go on a killing spree. This film is credited for making famous the line "Taste my Scarlet Shower!".

99.5 forest gump returns in 2 gump 2 furious

This 5 hour instalment follows the story of forest gumps ill-fated attempts to join an underground running club, famed as being the most badass running clubin the whole west end. This movie ends in tears, mainly the audiences but i think forest also cried a bit when his magical shoes where lost to the bottom of the sea, i dont know by that time most of the audience had passed into comas, a natural defence mechanism so i have been told.

99. Sucking Green 

(USA, 1985) The inspiring true story of one man's courageous attempt to fellate Lou Ferrigno.

98. Comrade Deeds Meets His Quota 

(USSR, 1936) Musical comedy about a hard working man who loves Stalin, and approves of the liquidation of the kulaks as a class. In Soviet Russia, comedy laughs at YOU!!.

98½. Bob Saget

Life Lessongs : (Netherlands, 2002) Need I say more?

[edit] 97 to 87.764268895

97. Rex Hunt's Fishing World 3D 

(Australia, 1993) Boy meets fish; boy catches fish; boy gets some action.

96. Van Helsing vs. Daredevil 

(Canada, 2005) Touchingly quirky and incredibly dull Canadian indie film about young love in Vancouver.

95. Being Woody Harrelson 

(USA, 1999) An absurdist journey into the complex mind of American actor Woody Harrelson.

94. Breakin' II: Electric Hybrid Boogaloo 

(USA, 2003) Herbie for the adult environmentalist set.

93. Three Hours of Primate Carcasses 

(USA, 1994) A unique look at death and decay from the perspective of a poacher's camera that was left on by accident. As Hollywood accepts any old crap as art these days, it wasn't hard for this film to make the jump from worthless amateur video footage to worthless dead animal fetish pornography, and finally to worthless cinema.

92. Is That An Intercontinental Ballistic Missile In Your Pocket, Or Are You Just Pleased To See Me? 

(USA, 1962) Comedy in which Kennedy and Khrushchev are set up on a blind date while vacationing in Havana.

91. A Funny Thing Happened On the Way to the Morgue 

(USA, 1950) Details the misadventures of a confused young mortician trying to find his purpose in life. Also involves necrophilia.

90. Netizen Kane 

(USA, 2001) A man running the world's most influential blog must face his personal demons: loneliness, the perils of success, and receiving a mere six eProps on his last post, which contained only a broken link to www.rosebud.gov.

89. Goldilocks and the Three Bears 

(New Zanzibar, 1972) B-grade farm porn.

88. Watching Lolita in Tehran 

(Iran, 2004) "Stirring" anti-censorship film. Banned in every country except New Zanzibar.

87.764268895. What's Eating Severus Snape? 

(UK, 2006) The first and last and final chapter in the three-part quadrilogy about the rough childhood of Hogwarts school teacher Severus Snape. This film documents his childhood to see exactly what shaped him into the mean old bastard he is.

Watch out for the 2008 sequel film Severus Snape vs. Alien vs. Trinity vs. Robocop vs. The Fantastic Four vs. Aeon Flux vs. Nightrider vs. The A-Team vs. Mr. Brown from Reservoir Dogs vs. Spider Man vs. George Costanza vs. Kramer vs. Kramer........

[edit] 87 to 78

87. Admins 

(USA, 1932) Tod Brownnose's pretentious introspection into the personal life, behind the tents, of wiki admins, and what happens when anflick telling of how Bruce Gayne became what he was destined to be: Father figure to a young circus acrobat who becomes his secret lover, Robin.

86. Pocahontas 4: Pocahontas Meets the Jews 

(ALTERNATE TITLE: Pocahontas 4: Pocahontas Meets Borat, Kyle Broflovski & Other Jews) (USA, 2004) Guest starring Borat & Kyle & Other Jews & Bush as their 1337est adventure that sucked ass as well. It's a film under seiged like Under Seige 2!

85. Bob Dole Runs For President of the United States of Bobdolemerica 

(USA, 1996) Bob Dole stars as Bob Dole in this wacky comedy where Bob Dole runs for President against Bill Clinton's penis (played by itself). The name "Bob Dole" was said 1,487 times, 1,469 of those were said by Bob Dole. This broke the previous record of zero.

84. Hotel Motherfucker! 

(USA/Japan/Motherfuckerland) Starring Samuel L. Jackson as Mario and Luigi!

83. The Harder They Came, The Harder They Fellatio 

(Monaco, 2004) Starring Jake Gyllenhaal and the exhumed corpse of Lillian Gish. The story tells of a simple love affair set against the backdrop of founding of the International Maritime Organization. This film really sucks.

82. Titanic ² 

(UNDER THE SEA,1997?) Leonardo DiCaprio has sex with some chick in a car that's on a boat for some reason. They somehow draw it out into 3 hours worth of grade-M lesbian porn between Leo and a few people, mostly transvestites and transsexuals.

81. Artefactz0rz 

(Aragoth, 20X6)Andy Dick buys something in a flea market that's haunted or important or... erm... of no real significance. Regardless, it's noted for the scenes where Andy still has semen on his mouth when the shooting starts. Filmed on a $5,000,000 budget, it made $9.50 total, and was removed from the theater and placed in the national archives in the scene from Raiders of the Lost Ark in one of those box-things after the only guy who ever paid to see it saw it. He committed suicide soon after.

80. Gone With The Wind 

(Burma, 1977) The tragic tale of a boy whose flatulence does not stink. Released in the US and UK as 'Thunder Pants'.

79. Oh Shit, The Robots Are Coming To Get Us 

(USA, 2006) A Hollywood explosion-orgy-fest just barely based on Isaac Asimov's original sci-erotica novel of tedious length. One of the many notable changes is in the opening teaser, when robopsychologist Susan Calvin (played by Yeardley Smith) inexplicably transforms herself into a giant killer robot and destroys most of Cleveland.

78. Fly Me to My Doom 

The terrifying true story of the Rat Pack.

[edit] 77

77. Donald Trump, The Musical 

(USA, 2004) Including such classic numbers as 'Oh what a Beautiful Morning... P.S. You're Fired!'

77. Movie made by group of wiki writers suffering from backlash after the Redundancy article decided to make a movie.

77. Film produced by collaboration of wiki writers suffering from the Redundancy article through together a George Lucas grade production.

77. Screen flick thrown together by some guys who enjoyed reading the Redundancy article way too much.

[edit] 76 to 60

76. Star Wars Episode VII: The Fallen Hero 

Why this was made, only SuperShadow and Satan know.

75. Star Wars Episode VIII: The Republic in Crisis 

The Geneva Conventions needed a new article added in after this one.

74. Star Wars Episode IX: Victory of the Force 

The only victory here was that Supershadow and Oprah were finally able to take over the Midwest after it seceded from the Union because of this pile.

73. De Lift 

(Netherlands, 1983) The tale of an elevator gone horribly wrong when someone who requested the sixth floor of the municipal abattoir ends up on the seventh.

72. We Were Solderers 

(USA, 1968) Left behind, but not left out: We Were Solderers chronicles the heroic deeds of conscientious objectors who stayed home and built weapons for the Vietnam war effort.

71. Bling Blade 

(USA, 1997) A rapper is released from a psychiatric hospital after killing his mother with a jewel-encrusted gold knife, dodging the rap, and sticking to his rap.

70. Driving Miss Daisy 2: The Undertaker 

(USA, 2005) The touching story of Miss Daisy's final drive.

69. Robofop 

(Canada, 1985) - An attractive and well dressed young man is attacked and killed by an group of ugly and very unfashionably dressed criminals. Scientists use his body to build a cyborg that is trendy and clean. The rest of the film shows the cyborg hunting down and "manscaping" his former killers.

68. Silence of the LANS 

(USA, 2004) - A young FBI agent tracks down an internet hacker who places software viruses in computer networks.

67. The Unusual Suspects 

(USA 1999) - The NYPD arrest an eclectic group of individuals with no criminal records and place them in a lineup. These include an Irish chef who can only cook potatoes and soda bread; an overtly heterosexual Born-again Christian Republican actor; an intensely introverted 65-year-old Spanish panhandler who cannot speak English; a man who plays Santa Claus all year round in Central Park; and a thalidomide sufferer with no arms or legs and an IQ of 30. Together they attempt (and fail) to find the exit after they are let go.

66. 2 Deep 2 Throat 

(USA 1976) - The story of an aspiring porn actress who manages to unseat the DeLay administration.

65. Un Nain Andalou 

(France 1930) - An avant-garde French film about a dwarf trapped in a Citroën.

64. Prances With Wolves 

(USA 1989) - An guy with a too-large moustache walks around in the desert for four hours like another idiot.

63. Cop Wars 2009 

(USA 1987) - The LAPD take on the NYPD in a futuristic, apocalyptic and post-colonic dyspepsia.

62. We Ended Up Having to Eat Each Other 

(USA 1972) - A Colombian lacrosse team survives their plane crash in the Himalayas, but how far will they go to stay alive? A gripping drama with a stunning conclusion. Hilarity ensues.

61. Bizarro Wallace and Grommit 

(Britain 1999) - The adventures of an alternative universe Wallace and Grommit, where Wallace is quite fond of eating Lamb and Grommit won't shut up.

60. Exploding Willy 

(USA 2002) - An intelligent whale escapes from Sea World but is unable to survive without human help. Eventually it dies of starvation and washes up on an Oregon beach, where its carcass is detonated by the local department of transportation. They also blow up a penis, so as not to disappoint the large percentage of the audience who only went to see the film because of their interest in phallic mutilation.

[edit] 59 to 43

59. Lucifer's Line Dance 

(USA 1977) - A Documentary that shows irrefutable links between Satanism and Country and Western Music.

58. Das Toot 

(Germany 1985) - A German U-boat attempts to survive a massive outbreak of flatulence amongst its crew. Not to be mistaken with the cross-dressing docudrama "Das Tootsie" or the controversially irrelevant film "Das Moot".

58.5. "Leekspin

The Movie" (Hell 666) - Some chick from Bleach spinning a leek for four FUCKING HOURS with finnish polka in the background.

Great when stoned though....

57. Triumph des Kanalisationsystems (Triumph of the Sewerage System) 

(Germany 1947) A documentary by director Leni Riefenstahl about the rebuilding of Germany's sewerage systems in the post-war period.

56. The Kurds 

(Britain 1966) An Alfred Hitchcock thriller about the invasion of a quiet, Northern Californian town by hordes of people from Turkey, Iran and Iraq.

55. The Big Polański 

(USA 2001) The anarchic adventures of an aging hippy and a Polish film director as they avoid capture by Interpol.

54. The Worminator 

(USA 1986) A Cyborg is sent from the future in order to educate people about the dangers of intestinal parasites. Soundtrack features Buns 'n' Toasties Rock Classic 'Parasite City'.

53. The Adventures of Baron Munchausen By Proxy 

(Britain 1989) A film about women who are unjustly imprisoned after going on a crazy adventure to defeat the Turk.

52. One Hour Photoshop 

(USA 2002) A man who creates wallpaper images for PCs becomes obsessed with a Sim family he interacts with.

51. Close Encounters of the Third Reich 

(USA, 1978) Adolf Hitler returns in a UFO, and he's pissed.

50. Honey, I ate the kids 

(USA 1992) Amusing family tale of a small-town amateur scientist and his accidental cannibalistic exploits.

49. Titanic vs Godzilla 

(USA/Japan 1999) Sequel to the popular 1997 movie. At the end of Titanic, Bruce Willis (played by Leonardo Di Caprio) destroys the iceberg after drilling into it and planting a nuclear bomb. But the ship is far from safe... Blown off course, it heads into Japan, home of the notorious Godzilla

48. XXY 

(USA 2002) Vin Diesel talks for 2 hours about his chromosomes.

47. I Couldn't Give A Shit About What You Did Last Summer 

(USA, 1998) College students survive homicidal maniac through the power of apathy.

46. Meatspin The Movie 

(USA, 2003) A drama/suspense film featuring two hours of spinning meat all up in your face. The special edition DVD that was recent released comes with the film's soundtrack, which has one song on it.

45. Herbie Does Dallas 

(USA, 1980) Ill-conceived car-porn movie. Famous for its autofellatio scenes..."Getcha motor runnin'..."

44. Revolver 

(UK, 2005) Not even a cameo-appearance by the reclusive John Lennon and comedic footage of Madonna falling off her horse can save this truly awful Brit-flic.

[edit] 43 to 18

43. Pulp Friction 

(USA, 1994) A look into a paper making factory, and the infamous events that happened there in 1984 when the paper mixture, or pulp, was not the right consistency, blocked up a machine and put the factory at a standstill for 3 days. This pioneering documentary revisits the factory and its workers, allowing them to reflect upon the experience and how it has influenced their lives.

42. Napoleon Dynamite 2: Back in Da Hood 

(USA, 1776) Everyones favorite gay porn star is back, and this time, he's reduced to his bare minimum and has to use his skills a straight up nigga to battle endless hordes of leper-gnomes. Starring your mom as Pedro, the asslicking janitor.

41. The Terminal-nator 

(USA, 2005) After the success of Academy Award winning Freddie vs. Jason, James Cameron and Steven Spielberg combine their franchise films in this train wreck of a movie. Arnold Schwarzenegger returns as the Terminator sent to kill Tom Hanks, who is living in an airport, for for no other reason than making cool looking explosions and snazzy one-liners.

40. YYZ 

(Canada, 2112) Canadian rip-off of XXX. This one finds Rush frontman Geddy Lee in the title role as secret agent YYZ as he and his partner Grace U. Pressure chase a mad man named Red Barchetta from the subway walls to concert halls, all the way to his lair in Red Sector "A."

39. A Bridge Too Far Too Furious 

(UK/USA 1967) War film based on race to the Rhine in 1945, with Vin Diesel racing his punk'd up Sherman Tank against heavily-modified Tiger tanks.

38. I Still Couldn't Give A Shit About What You Did Last Summer 

(USA 1999) Weak sequel, where the apathetic college kids are still managing to avoid the psychopath by never being around when he visits or bothering to return his calls. Technically, this should have been called I Still Couldn't Give A Shit About What You Did The Summer Before Last.

37. Donnie Fargo 

(USA 2002) Donnie Darko appears in Tangent Universe Minnesota as Jerry Lundegard's son. "Where's mom?", "She got hit by a jet engine son, eh?".

36. Disney's The Lion King 4 With a Vengeance 

(USA 20XX) Simba sets off with dual uzis to once again avenge his father and milk off a long dead series, one last time.

35. Roe vs. Wade 2 - Final Decision 

(USA 2005) What the Supreme Court thought of as all in a day's work turns out to be so much more. Remembered mostly for that awesome lobby scene where the evening news employs special bullet-time effects to make the scene look a whole lot more interesting than it really is.

34. The Matrix - Rescucitation 

(USA 2008) Neo is revived by the Machine Overmind after being killed by Agent Smith. He proceeds to fight a program more evil and powerful than Agent Smith, Super-Techno-Mecha-Jesus GX. While the Wachowski Brothers take a 3-hour dump on the Science Fiction genre.

33. Pyrites of the Caribbean 

(USA, 2003) Johnny Depp is disappointed to discover that Blackbeard's treasure is actually Iron Disulfide.

32. Red Dawn of the Resident Evil Dead Poets Society of Sergeant Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band of Four Blues Brothers Grimm 

(USA, 1970) When there's no more room in Soviet Russia, the dead will walk the USA and depend on each other to be your inspirationally fatal mistake. A splendid time is guaranteed for all. No curse they can't reverse. Because they're on a mission from God in a yellow submarine who came to bury their mother, and her killer. Groovy.

31. 0 Fast 0 Furious 

(Japan, 2004) Japanese horror director Pingu Yakamoto explores Vin Diesel's dark past, and the terrifying events that lead to the death of his psychic half-sister. Not for the faint hearted.

30. The Rocky Horror Show 3: Bullwinkle's Revenge 

(USA, 2001) Sylvester Stallone reprises his role as Rocky, the lovable boxing squirrel. This Time Bullwinkle (Mr T) is out for revenge, and he's going to pity the fool who makes fun of his cross-dressing.

29.26 µm. Die Hard 5: Nursing Home 

(USA, 2034) Bruce Willis Officer John McLain returns to serve out a plate of whopass to all who want it. This time round the movie takes place in his local retirement village, where him and all the other actors past their peak hold an uprising against the nurses. Directed By Tom Hanks

29. Katamari Damacy: The Motion Picture 

(ROFLville, 2009) When the King of all Cosmos (Bruce Willis) destroys all the stars, it's up to his one, gun-toting son, the prince (Samuel Jackson) to roll up enough stuff to restore the sky. Directed by Tony Hawk.

28. Casparblanca 

(Mediocre Britain, 2008) In a rare "double whammy", Lion's Gate Films decides to make a remake of the classic film Casablanca and the heartwarming tale of Casper the Friendly Ghost. The movie cost $700 million to make, and included such elaborate measures as biogenetically reconstructing Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman, and then killing both of them. The movie grossed over $3.47 and some string at the box office, and made $200 in DVD sales.

27. Homotard 

(USA, 1992) Tom Hanks plays a homosexual retard, in an often gay and retarded performance.

26. Police Appendectomy III 

(USA, 1987) Hightower gets an acute pain in his side and is rushed off to hospital by Maloney. Hilarious slapstick ensues.

25. April of the Penguins 

(France, 2005) Unexpected and unwanted sequel. The penguins are back, and guess what, they still can't fly.

24. The Making of...Duke Nukem Forever 

(USA, 3984) Documentary covering the long awaited game which still hasn't come out. Thus, the film ends after a decade of continuous footage. Some high points include the making of the innovative "aliens invading earth and taking all of the women" plot, and the voice actor for Duke himself keeling over of starvation and exhaustion after recording over a million Dukeisms in one long week. The end is still unbeknownst to all of those who have watched it, because everyone who has watched the film has either committed suicide or walked out of the theater early with an urge to kick bubblegum and chew ass.

23. Andy Warhol Controls the Universe 

(Wackytown, 1974) Mr. Warhol hits new experimental heights in this film about a filmmaker making a film about a film whose filmmaker filmed it entirely with the lens cap on.

22. Programming Perl 

(USA, 2006) Unsuccessful movie adaptation of the O'Reilly book. Starring Vin Diesel as Larry Wall and George Moussa as the Camel.

21. Speed 3: 8 Miles Per Hour 

(USA, 2003) Eminem and Sandra Bullock are stuck on a runaway motorized lawnmower. Outstanding!

20. Ferris Bueller's Day he Got off! 

(USA, 1985) Watch Ferris and his wacky Girlfriend and best friend find ways to skip school, pretend to be sick and Get each other off while avoiding the Principal and his unusual desire to have sex with Dogs!

19. Much Ado about 0 

(UK, 1992) Shakespeare's play converted entirely into the language of pure mathematics, and performed by dwarves.

18. Blank 180 Minutes 

(Japan, 1982) Since its initial release, this minimalist title has been the biggest-selling title on VHS ever. The plot, although far superior to Uwe Boll films, is sub-standard. The 1984 sequel (Blank 240 Minutes) received worse reviews still.

17. Alien vs Predator Requiem for a Dream 

(USA, 2002) A little town in the hills of Colorado will become the battleground between two of the deadliest extra-terrestrial lifeforms - the Predator, a lonely, TV obsessed alien, and his son Alien, his girlfriend Bitch, and his drug dealer friend Motherfucker. After learning that he will make an appearance on a TV game show, Predator tries to lose weight so that he can fit into his prized red dress, and becomes hooked on diet pills. Meanwhile, Alien and his friends are taking heroin and cocaine. One at a time, the inhabitants of the town become targets of the Alien and the Predator, including the local sheriff, an 87-year old prostitute recently returned from Turkmenistan, and several gay antisemisitic black buddhist necropedozoophile priests. Though the National Guard is called in, they are unable to stop the deadly creatures, and a plan is set in motion to destroy the town with a nuclear device...

[edit] 17 to Pi

17. The Grue who Ate Christmas 

(USA, 1979) The popular story of how Santa got stuck in a cave. He had exits to the north, the south and the west.

16. Paul Allen vs Predator 

(USA, 2005) Can $21 Billion dollars protect you from an invisible alien hunting machine? Gory fun for all the family.

15. There's Something Above Mary 

(USA, 2004) Wherever Mary goes, there is a small city floating above her head. The story never explains why, but it has some nice scenes with a cute dog.

14. Texas Shawshank Redemption Massacre 

(USA, 1996) An innocent man is sent to jail, to prove his innocence he must brutally murder everyone around him. Sad ending, he moves to Kansas.

13. KKK: Kosher Kafe Klub 

(USA, 1921-2005) The story of the peaceful, intelligent and tolerant group who just wanna hug people.

12. Dirty Dancing with Wolves

(USA, 1990) Spending the summer in a holiday camp with her family, Frances (Kevin Costner) falls in love with her lupine dance teacher. "Oh! What big eyes you've got", she says. "HAAAAOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW kind of you to notice", he replies, etc. etc.

11. AOL: The Movie 

(USA, 2000) ASL? LOL R U THERE... The whole country gets infected by a brain virus distributed in the post on CD-ROM. UR GR8 NO U SUK HAHAHAH. Anyone who visited the cinema to see this film was forever trapped, because the ushers were instructed to let no-one escape, and brutally sever the internet connection of (but not refund) anyone who tried. Also, anyone trapped who tried to watch another film found themselves allowed only to watch Monsters Inc. and Cars for all eternity, because the parental controls failed to note that many of the trapped people were in fact parents, and all of them were adults. You can attempt to free the trapped movie-goers by bombing the Odeon Cinema, 27th Avenue, New Jersey. Or something...

Pi. Inuyasha Movie 18-Back to the Sengoku 

(USA/Japan, 2006) Kagome visits her cousin in Hill Valley, California and brings along the rest of the group just for kicks. As if the culture shock of being in another country in the 21st century isn't enough, they somehow get sent back to the year 1985, and have to either track Doc Brown's time machine (before it gets destroyed) or get a flight back to Japan so they can take the well back to the Sengoku period and then back to modern times, all while cracking stupid "where's the beef" and New Coke jokes. Meanwhile Naraku shows up and possesses Madonna, planning to destroy Kagome in her past by trying to seduce her dad before he meets her mom. Unbearably cheesy tween-written crossover fanfiction at its worst.

[edit] The top 10 (kind of)

10. Four Wingdings and a Funeral 

(UK, 1994) A story of death and typography. Overuse of ugly fonts drives mild-mannered designer to try more, and more bizarre fonts. This inevitably leads to intravenous drug use and a grisly death.

9. Armenian Beauty 

(Armenia, 1998) True story of one man's desperate search in this post-soviet republic for any girl who doesn't look like the back side of a cow. Warning. Images of ugly women may offend.

8.5 She's A Man 

(USA, 2004) The story of a 28 year old transvestite man who is exposed from the waist down... literally. Starring Mando Bynes. (Amanda's not very well known half brother.)

8. Finding Netherlands 

(USA, 2003) Can expert explorer Indiana Jones discover the long-lost, maybe mythical, European country? No. Will he die trying? Dear god, let's hope so.

7. The Soap Guy 

(USA, 2002) A man gets sent to prison for stealing soap bars from the local market. Little does he know what Bubba has in store for him.

6. Kill Bill and Ted's X-rated Adventure 

(USA, 2002) Bill and Ted are having an excellent adventure through time, but someone wants to stop them...

5. Carry on Molesting 

(UK, 1965) Slapstick UK comedy about a guy who can't stop fondling strange women in public.

4. Die Hard IV: The Wilderness Years

(USA, 1999) An X-rated pornography about sex during war, though it usually turns out to be necrophilia, and there's a few pretty loud cock-slaps in there.

π. American π 

(USA, 2001) A semi-psychotic mathematician discovers the perfect mathematical theory for getting high school chicks naked.

3. All Your Base Are Belong To Us 

(Russia, Glastnost) A historical documentary about the frenetic negotiations between Kruschev and Kennedy to avert a third world war.

e. Bring Me The Clothes Dryer of Alfredo Garcia 

(Vatican City, 2001) A long overrun franchise proven by movie-goers around the world staying away from the screens in droves.

2. The Eragon Movie 

Need I say much else? An absolute fucking insult to Chris Paolini(the author dammit). Fantastic book but so god damn cut down and so forth that it would now be physicaly impossible to create a movie of the sequal with out redoing the origional... COMPLEATELY! Also, my spelling is an insult to the English language.

1.5 Twilight. Nuff said.

1. Citizen Kane 

It's like in Black and White, Twilight is so much better. OHMIGAWD! Ya know what would be awesome?! If Twilight had SOS by the Jonas Brothers in it, and like every song from the Hannah Montana soundtrack! OH MY GAWD YES!!!

(P.S. The person who chose the #1 pick has just been raped in the ear...)

[edit] 0 to Negative infinity

0. My Hero Zero 

(USA, 1996) Live action version of one of the least popular Schoolhouse Rock episodes. Coming in at just under three hours of mostly mathematical propaganda of the alleged utility of zero, it unsuccessfully anthropomorphized the plucky number into a superhero of unbelievable proportions, until he was tragically slain in the act of illegal division.

-1. Super Sayian Jesus Power Up! 

(The 700 Club, Oprah, Japan, some dude) The movie we waited for since Super Sayian Jesus came back after our holy father, Benedict XVI died! But what happened as that Jesus turned out to be a pussy and didn't blow up any land outside of Israel and Palestine! What a crapfest! I want my 8 dollars back! Oh crap, he's above me! Noooo! His powers! too much!!!!!

-2. Shaws Shank Redemption 

(1XXX, USA) A down-on-his-luck chef gets caught up in the prison system and must cook his way out of the death penalty.

-3. The Land Before Time 300,000,099: Dear God Please Let The Goddamn Comet Show Up And Kill Them All Already

(3386, USA) Rather than go out and have formulaic adventures, Littlefoot and his friends decide to stay home and eat tree stars for two hours. Then, they go off to visit their cannibal friend, the little T-rex. Only, now he's really big... and hungry. Littlefoot gets his head ripped off, Cera learns she has paranoia schizophrenia, and Spike eats Ducky, very messily. Everyone else is shocked, and distressed, until the sharp-tooth eats them too. Interestingly, nobody noticed the difference between this and the other 5 billion sequels until 3391.

-12. Thirteen Goats 

(Somewhere, Timetime) A lonely shepherd loses his favourite goat in a barn fire. He is really upset.

-13. Hurricane Katrina: The Movie 

(USA, 2006) About Katrina bragging about her damage in New Orleans, and how much she loved Atlantis and wanted to turn a real city into one.

-14. Dictionary: The Movie 

(England, 1886) A twelve hundred hour movie defining every word in the English language. Directed by Peter Jackson.

-15. Zac Efron: the Movie 

(Hell, 2008) A twelve hour compilation of every movie and TV show Zac Efron has ever appeared in. Because he is known as the "worst actor in history", this straight-to-DVD release has been banned by the European Union.

-16. Zac Efron in Seppuku the musical! 

(US, 2008) Zac Efron has given up on life. He is tired of being such an ass and he just wants to end it all the honourable way - with Seppuku! Several seppuku-themed opera-flavoured tunes fill the soundtrack with colour and life. Fortunately, in a surprise twist, Zac Efron actually does commit Seppuku by accident.

-17. Farscrape: the Skin-Cutter Wars 

All great wounds heal, but this one gonna leave a scar. Four hours of random people skidding on the ground.

-18. Columbine: Full Throttle 

Everyone's favorite little rascals Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold are back in a hilarious new adventure that will send them across the world.

-19. The Terminally-ill

Tom Hanks plays a Soviet terrorist who brings Avian Flu to America. Will they be able to contain the virus in time? Not a chance in hell.

-20. Big Brother: The Movie 

(England, 2013) A REALLY bad movie of the reality TV show that just brought the kitchen outside. Starring an octopus, This Guy, Oscar Wilde and a bunch of others that someone never even bothered to list.

-21. Shaving Ryan's Privates 

(USA, 2000) What happened after Private Ryan was saved.

-22. Wallace and Vomit 

(USA, 2004) Wallace has a fatal case of influenza, and he's puking his guts out! Now with the voices of Voldemort, Helena Bonham Carter and the people who usually voice Wallace & Vomit...

-23. Get Beat Up And Die Cryin' 

(USA, 2005) Story about a crappy rapper who's worth 50 cents.

-24. Lord of the Nose-rings: The two mountains that Arwen has 

(New Zealand, 2006) All the male protagonists of this film ogle Arwen's boobies. So does Galadriel.

-25. Linux: The Movie 

(GNU, 2009) When open-source gets out of control and completely inept users stop paying for their operating systems, it's up to Mr. Gates to remind everyone what America really needs... Microsoft.

-26. 10 Things I Hate About Jew 

(GER, 1941) Teen Drama set in the Auschwitz POW camp.

-27_-2^-2-2. Damn Lie 

(America, 2002) A movie involving George W. Bush being the smartest man in the world, not having slutty daughters, and not being connected to miserable failure. (See miserable failure)

-28. Signs of Anti-Semitism 

(USA, 2002) Graham Hess loses his faith when his wife is killed by a Jewish rabbi but a inevitable Jewish invasion forces him to confront his crisis of faith while protecting his family.

-29. Big Momma's Cider House Rules 

An orphaned young man raised by Michael Caine goes undercover as a overweight black woman at an apple orchard. He teaches valuable lessons to the apple pickers in a slightly humorous way (featuring vagina jokes)but when he learns that Delroy Lindo rapes black women, he decides to be white again and becomes an abortionist.

-30. Rocky 8 

Rocky, now 72, fights cancer in this action packed sequel!

-31. Super Psycho Android Jesus 

Jesus is once again reincarnated to finally rid the world of other religions once and for all! Directed by James Cameron and starring Bruce Willis, this sci-fi epic set the benchmark for films everywhere. Two sequels have been announced.

-32. Super Mario Bros. 3 

The brothers must unclog the citizens of the Mushroom Kingdom's drains, while Bowser is getting central bypass surgery.

-33. A Convenient Truth 

Twelve new ice cream flavors are discussed.

-34. The OC Movie 

It's a girl's night shopping!

-35. Dude, Where's My C++ Gui Programing Guide? 

Two dudes are talking computer stuff.

-36. Uwe Boll's The Sims 

Uwe Boll directs an adaptation of The Sims, a film that is spoken completely in Simlish AND randomly placed naked girls.

-37. Eating Pasta in a Space Suit 

An instructional video on how to eat pasta in a space suit. SPOILER ALERT It involves removing the space suit then eating the pasta.

-38. Jurassic Lark 

A lunatic scientist brings a long-extinct species of lark back from the Jurassic era, but no one notices.

-39. Land Before Time XXXVIII 

Littleneck, Cera and Petrie go on an adventure! Song! Intriguing conversation! Song! Physical humor! SHARP-TEETH! DANGER! Rescued by loving parents! Song! Poignant symbolic cinematography! Song! Credits! Peroid.

-40. V for Mandela 

The story of one man and his will to save a broken country...he also wears a mask and has a jukebox

-41. Mountie Fightin' and the Fowly Fail 

An absurd saga about two Canadian policemen who fights about who destroyed the Peking duck they were cooking.

-42. The Miming 

Jack Nicholson goes apeshit on a street performer. Tagline: "No glass and no rope makes Jack incredibly pissed off."

-43. Honey, I Hate the Kids 

A gritty look into domestic violence... with Rick Moranis.

-44. Romeo and Juliet II: The Payback 

Romeo and Juliet are back!!! They're going to make their families come together... or there'll be hell to pay!

-45. Fire Hydrant 2: Rehydrated

-46. Dumb and Dumberest: Pro-Abortion Argument 

(USA, SUCK) It's Baby Geniuses, only way, way retarded. Baby Lloyd shoots Baby Harry in the crotch with a flare gun and the two trek to the nearest hospital. Wicket the Ewok makes a movie-killing appearance.

-47. Felix the Cat: The Sexy Dame

Two words: Oriana's orgy

-48. DragonForce: The Movie 

It's utter chaos as the big-bads from every single fantasy adventure game ever made escape into the real world. The fate of the world rests in the fingers of Herman Li and Sam Totman, as DragonForce attempt to save the world with high pitched vocals, tediously long guitar solos and pacman sound effects. Contains over 4 hours worth of mindless shredding.

-49. Super Size Me: The Musical

(USA, 2009) America's Favourite documentary didn't make enough money the first time through, so the guy who stared in the previous movie came back and did it all again while singing.

Opera gave it a 10/10 which is why its on this list of worst movies.

-72. Lady Gaga: The Movie

Enough Said.

-94. Black Dumo

(USA, 2010) A disgusting look into how Shadow the Hedgehog was created and born.

Nominated for an academy award for disgusting directing, by director Don Bluth.

-666. Grim Ripper Superstar: The Film

Adaptation of the Black Metal Opera with the same name, written by Varg Vikernes during his time as a backing singer in Abba, it highlights the difficulty the main character, The Grim Ripper, has in finding true love, due to the fact that he ultimately has to kill all his soul mates. The film was most successful in Iran, grossing over 20.000.000 Iranian Rials. Rated J.

-667. House of Tax 

Four hours of Paris Hilton running from the IRS in a bikini. 98% of viewers turned to stone after three minutes of the film the other two percent were blinded. Paris Hilton has yet to be sentenced for committing crimes against humanity upon making the film.

-668. Blue Helmet 

A psychotic Dennis Hopper rapes a mental Isabella Rossellini while shoving Blue Helmets in her mouth.

-669. Blackula VS Blackenstein VS The Black Mummy 

Has an extreme amount of drug use and gang violence despite being advertised as a Romantic Comedy.

-670. Yu-Gi-Oh

The Abridged Series The Movie! Super Special Awesome!</nowiki> : (2008) Staring Little Kuriboh (GOD), this movie is yet another satirical approach at the great and popular series Yu-Gi-Oh, which is about grown men playing children's card games.........IN AMERICA!

-671. Fred Otts big sneeze

One of the 1st movies ever made but it is no excuse for the fact this movie has no story at all. its just some dude sneezing and also since theirs no sound you can't hear him sneeze which takes the fun out of it.

-671. Pokemon: The Worst Movie 

(USA, 1999) Herman MacPikachu (played by Sylvester Stallone) and Edward J. Charmander (played by Nicholas Cage) journey to Bombay, India to become movie stars! Unfortunately, they never get there due to a rampaging Godzilla coming the opposite way...

-1000.Snakes on a plane 

Samuel L. Jackson returns to his most famous role of all time, MotherFuckin' Snakes on a MotherFuckin' Plane. A terrorist manages to sneak 1 million zillion quadrillion quafillion villion snakes in a plastic suitcase. Samuel L. Jackson Kills all of them. ALL OF THEM. Watch this Bad MotherFucker. You must see it. Paris Hilton and Uwe Boll Costarr in this totally insane epic adventure.In Soviet Russia, Movie watches YOU!!!

-+WORST... YOUR FACE!!

Yup. I'll bet you didn't see that coming, did you?

-EVEN WORSE: Fuck! 

(1965, UK) Ooh, pardon the title! I'm a lady, you see. Anyway, the sequel to the Beatles film Help!, this film is about the Beatles trying to get inside Ahme's knickers. But there are just three problems. One, Ahme is a lesbian. Two, Ahme doesn't wear knickers. Three, she has a rather nasty bikini line. So John, Paul, Ringo and George end up fancying each other. Based on the fact that the Beatles did more in their bedrooms than sleep alone... They tried to sleep with each other. Eww.

-Infinity+1

Shit! : (2003, UK/USA) Sequel to "Fuck!". Period.

-ARRRRGH! Alien vs. The Beatles 

(2007, USA) The world's favourite thriller about aliens combined with the world's favoutire band equals utter garbage. Paul bursts out of a girl's chest. John is impregnated by an alien. Ringo is a facehugger. George has a crush (oh sweet love!) on Ripley. Only for Beatlemaniacs... since I'm one, I think I'll go see this film.

-Shreck 40 

Scheduled for release in 2134, In this intimate family film, Fiona finally tells Shreck about her feelings for her long lost brother, Bill Gates. Shreck goes into a fit of rage, and slaughters children while they are attending their tea parties. Donkey helps by kicking their faces in, and Pussy in Boots (Name changed after sex change operation in Shreck 24) molests the ones awaiting to be killed. Fiona and Gates marry, creating the first Mac Human! Can you say "Electronic Orgy!" ?

-High School Musical 50

The Wildcats sing a retarded upbeat song about their deaths. Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens are taken off of life support. Gayest Movie ever period.

- MUSICAL! The Musical

We open on a giant musical flying in; a thousand Vietnamese orphans swarm the stage, and the music starts...

"Musical, Musical, Musicallittyittytittyittytwittyusical!" Yep, you guessed it, the only word spoken throughout the movie is "Musical". Money back, please.

-OVER 9000!!!!. Disaster Movie

Honestly, that movie sucked.

- Infinity to the power of infinity to the power of infinity and so on and so forth... Myfuck Craprus the Movie. Self-explanatory.

- ??? Saving Ryan's Privates.

[edit] Honorable (Not-So-Horrible) Mentions

• The Nightmare Before Christmas II
• Pirates of the Caribbean 7: More Franchise Money for Disney!
• House Of Flying Buggers
• Alien vs Grue
• The Shining 2: The Overlook's Revenge!
• Bad-Ass:The Movie
• Dr Strangelove or: How I learned to stop worrying, sit down and relax for a bit, try and read or something, maybe eat a cheese sandwich,and basically do anything other than obsessively think about being obliterated in a massive nuclear explosion
• Revenge of the Titanic
• Borat 2: Make great movie benefit the great country of Tzeckistaniastiananananananananananan-so long is unpronouncable by puclic normals movie of cultur of great country of Mexico border hoppers
• Worst Movie Ever
• Zork: The Movie
• 10 Things I Hate About You
• Ingmar Bergman's The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy
• Cremaster Cycle
• Parents and Children
• Smell the Glove
• Not Another Christian Movie
• Hell: A Love Story
• The Fireman Film
• Salad Days
• Waking Life
• Cloverfield 2: The Godzilla Rip-off Returns!
• Pong! the Movie
• Enter the Dragon
• Godzilla XXVIII: More Japanese People Screaming
• Never Talk to Strangers
• Never Ever, Ever Say Never Ever Again, Ever
• The Brothers Solomon
• The Buttercream Gang
• The Crying Game
• The Queen of the Damned
• Total Drama Island: The Movie
• 10 Things I Hate About You
• Planet of the Apes: The Untold Story
• Pirates of the Dwarf Cove
• Titan A.E.
• The Beatletrix: Regurgitations
• The Beatletrix: Retardations
• Alan Moore's A Clockwork Orlando
• Homer Simpson's Oddessy (Can't He Spell!?!?)
• The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and Yoko Ono
• Magical Hysterectomy Tour
• The Passion Of The Christ 2: CRUCIFY THIS!!
• Not Another Remake
• The Three Caballeros Strike Back
• Happy Tree Friends: It's Largest, Biggest, Longest, and Cutest
• Warriors of the Singalong