Worst 100 Books of All Time

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These are the Top 101 Worst Books of All Time. Pretty self explanatory...And i know there's lots of 100 Worst Something Books (like Children's Books) already, but this is for those that don't fit under any category.

Contents

[edit] 101-91

101 "By The Porn Movies I sat Down and masturbated"
Paulo Coelho's MASTURpiece turned to be a tool to MASTURbate .
100 "The One Hundredth Book Ever Written"
Not as great as it sounds.
99 "The Great Botswanan Novel"
There wasn't much to write about.
98 "The One-Word Book"
No, the one word wasn't anything worthy like "the" or "fuck", it was "bollocks". What a waste of literature!
97 "The Freakishly Long 19th Century Book With Multiple Titles", or "Debating the Fact Those People Wasted a Ton Load of Ink", or "The Origin of the Common Numerical Practice of Addition"
It was something about one of those things... well you try keeping up with 19th century book titles!
96 "We Would Like to Play"
An autobiography of those semi-old Japanese guys from the Wii commercials.
95 "Pokemon and the Chamber of Secrets"
Did you think a Pokemon-Harry Potter crossover would be good?
94 "Al-Qaeda Members Handbook"
Al-Qaeda is nice enough to give its members a handbook. I don't see the US Army doing that...
93 "Old English Philosophies with Snoop Dogg"
Snoop Dogg give his thoughts about Old English... in a New English style!
92 "The Telescope"
The epic story of an astronomer who finds joy in watching his neighbor change clothes.
91 "Write Your Own Book!"
You get to write your own book in these blank pages of fun!

[edit] 90-81

90 "The Still Neverending Story"
It's STILL not over!
89 "Memoirs of a Gay Geisha"
More awkward than a porno featuring Barack Obama.
88 "Dusk"
Yet another sequel to Twilight, except with more vampires, more irrelevant romance, and more of the same old pointless plot.
87 "Jason and the Toronto Argonauts"
Jason ditches his old crew to join the Canadian Football League team, the Toronto Argonauts.
86 "The Elven Wind"
Something about elves...
85 "Imaginationland- Homecoming"
The kids from South Park make an epic return to Imaginationland.
84 "Masturbator and Commander"
This powerful duo of sea dogs won't exactly win the Napoleonic Wars for England
83 "Little Woman"
The prequel to "Little Women", starring a character deemed just too small for its sensational sequel.
82 "Robinson Crusoe 2"
Robinson Crusoe gets stranded on the Death Star, without Wilson.
81 "The French Family Robinson"
The greatest achievement in stereotypical literature, EVER.

[edit] 80-71

80 "The Man in the Plastic Mask"
Some French royal guy wakes up with a plastic mask on his face and in prison. What a whimsical joke from the nobles!
79 "Call of McCthulain
John McCain is actually a monstrous deity.
78 "Terrible Expectations"
Pip becomes homeless or something. The book was declared too British and pulled off the shelves.
77 "The Lion, the Wich, The Wardrobe, the Unicorn, the Snow, the Umbrella, the Tumbleweed, and the Stick"
A group of kids magically enter Snow World through a wardrobe and instantly spoil the obvious ending.
76 "The Magician's Illegitimate Son"
A sequel to number 77.
75 "The Silver Floorboard"
A sequel to number 76.
74 "Prince Archibald"
A sequel to number 75.
73 "The Koala and His Boy"
A sequel to number 74.
72 "Running Out of Ideas"
A summary of this article. Come on, there has to be some comedic genius out there willing to help...
71 "Still Running Out of Ideas"
*Taps fingers on table* I'm waitin'...

[edit] 70-61

70 "To Kill a Mockingbird"
Just a horrible book...
69 "The Adventures of John McCain and his Vegetable Friends
Watch this to understand.
68 "Lord of the Rings- Frodo's Urinary Infection"
Don't ask...
67 "A Complete, Comprehensive History of Uncyclopedia, the World's Best Encyclopedia"
No elaboration needed.
66 "Teh Magnicifent Workld fo Typsuo"
yAys fro typso.
65 "Lord of The Rings- The Broken Engagement"
Biblo's in a lot of shit now! Sequel to #68.
64 "This is Sparta"
King Leonidas's autobiography and anti-Persian rants.
63 "The Old Man and the Viagra"
A fishermen discovers Viagra...you guess what happens next!
62 "Sixty-Two"
George Orwell's take on the year 62.
61 "Oliver Bitch"
The British boy Oliver Bitch becomes a great nuisance at his orphanage, and ends up getting flogged.

[edit] 60-51

60 "The Prince and the Lauper"
Edward the somethingth decides to switch places with Cyndi Lauper. The Spanish Armada invades England that evening.
59 "Samuel L. Jackson Meets A Motherfucker""
If you thought he was tired of the motherfuckin' snakes on the motherfuckin' plane, wait til you read this book.
58 "A Connecticut Redcoat in King Arthur's Court"
The adventures of a man who travels backward in time to introduce Baseball to a country far before its time.
57 "The Adventures of Salmonberry Finn"
Salmonberry Finn goes on an adventure in the Pacific Northwest. He encounters common local issues, such as rain, rain, and rain.
56 "The Count of Monte Carlo"
A blackjack dealer steals $10 million from the Monte Carlo Casino, and is quickly fired without the story beginning.
55 "The (Number to be decided on) Musketeers"
The entire book is the Three Musketeers debating that their name should be changed to 4 due to the fact there are actually 4 (Porthos, Athos, Aramis, and D'Artagnan) musketeers.
54 "A Columbus Day Carol"
The tale of an old store owner who makes his workers stay to work on Columbus Day. That night he goes on a psychadellic journey with the Ghost of Columbus Day Past.
53 "Moby Penis"
An aptly named whale bites an alcoholic captain's leg off, and he attempts to kill the whale. The captain goes insane, and forces his shipmates to mutiny him in a musical manner.
52 "The Strange Case of Dr. Phil and Mr. Rogers"
Dr. Phil creates a split personality, and becomes the sadistic sweater-loving killer Mr. Rogers.
51 "Around the World in 80 Seconds"
It's like Harold and Kumar but without the pot. Lame...

[edit] 50-41

50 "The Hunch-Quarterback of Notre Dame"
The Notre Dame football team experiences another terrible season under overrated fatass, short-tempered coach Charlie Weis. The hunchbacked quarterback orders his team to mutiny him.
49 "If I Did It And Then Wrote a Book About What Would've Happened If I Had Done It"
By O.J. Simpson.
48 "Jackie Robinson Crusoe"
Written by Ku Klux Klan members, it shockingly includes racist overtones.
47 "To Kill a Dodo Bird"
The epic struggle of dodo birds vs. gluttonous Dutch sailors.
46 "Lord of the Mosquitos"
A homeless man thinks he possess divine powers over mosquitos. He then relizes mosquitos follow him just because he smells like shit.
45 "Stranger In a Strange Land"
Martians come to earth and form a cult devoted to sex, lulz, and magic.
44 "War of the Words"
Tom Cruise engages in a techno-reggae rap battle with Shia Labouef, throughout the whole 500-page book.
43 "Field of Unfulfilled Dreams"
The story of how the Chicago Cubs can't win the World Series. Includes eye-witness accounts of phantom billy goats at Wrigley Field.
42 "Punk'd by an Angel"
Ashton Kutcher reveals how an acid trip gave him the idea for Punk'd.
41 "On the Origin of Your Mom"
Charles Darwin looks into the evolution of the your mom joke by means of unatural selection.

[edit] 40-31

40 "Juice- Wild Strawberry, Rampant Raspberry, Smashing Orange & How My Penis Got Big"
Jose Canseco looks into how fruit juice can increase the size of your weiner.
39 "Robind Hood and his Not-So-Merry Men"
Robin Hood re-organizes his infamous gang, which now consists of chavs.
38 "A Motherfuckin' Catcher in the Motherfuckin' Rye"
Samuel L. Jackson is unfortuantely back...again...and not as Mace Windu.
37 "The Jungle People"
Rudyard Kipling's imperialist/anti-Indian ways clash with his views of a happy jungle which is bound for a Disney movie.
36 "Shortstop in the Rye"
Holden Caufield is a phony.
35 "The Hobbit 2- Hobbitz in da Hood"
A groups of hobbits form a street gang in Los Angeles. Prepare for chaos, dwarves, and Star Trek references!
34 "Hamlet Unedited and Unpublished"
Hamlet was actually a male prostitute? Who knew! Not Shakespeare....
33 "Not Gone With the Wind"
If the South won, we wouldn't be inspired to write such unecessarily long American classics.
32 "Uncyclopedia The Book"
This book made Oscar Wilde cry.
31 "Noontime Express"
American tourist Billy Mays is arrested in Turkey for attempting to smuggle cleaning products out of the country. Later made into a movie starring Randy Quaid, with a musical score by Giorgio Moroder.
2 "Romeo And Julio"
Makes Shakespeare even gayer than it already is.
- Infinity "Twilight"
 :For Being Assy as crap. P.S Vampires are not supposed to sparkle and suck cock

[edit] Honorable Mention

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