Winter solstice
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Winter solstice is an atheist holiday and is considered by many as the ultimate holiday. It is held on a varying day in December but is often celebrated in June when winter is its coldest. Even thought it is an atheist holiday it is often celebrated by communists, Satanists, racists gay people and the occasional emo as well. The holiday its self is all about the glorification of atheism, Satan, Nazism, gayness, and communism and can be celebrated in a variety of ways (see below).there have been several rip-offs of winter solstice over the years such as Hanukkah, Christmas, and of course Kwanzaa.
[edit] How to celebrate
A typical winter solstice is celebrated of course by doing drugs and worshipping Satan. However, no winter solstice would be complete without an ethnic cleansing of your local neighbourhood to insure the purity of the Aryan race. A public mass suicide is sometimes done in cites with large numbers of people who celebrate. Another way to celebrate is to go to Compton and make fun of black people and then following it up by laughing at Mexicans in east L.A. The most important thing all winter solstices must have is ass fucking contest.It can also be celebrated by giving your self blue balls.
The best way to celebrate the winter solstice is the Fleetwood Mac method. This requires the participants to dress up in flowy fabrics, do lines of cocaine off toilet seats, have a mass orgy then chant the traditional mantra "The Chain" in order to awaken the sun goddess.
[edit] Who invented winter solstice
Winter solstice was invented by Nazi party members Ronald Mcdonald, Adolf hitler, and his best friend George Dubya Bush. They originally planned it to be June 6 but changed it to in December to piss people off since its part of the holiday season now. Hitler originally didn't want the ethnic cleansing to be part of the holiday, but George Bush insisted.
