| Why? |
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One of the major questions asked by young sons to their father, along with Why?:Do you drink too much? and Why?:Do you keep hurting me?, this deceptively simple question has taxed the meager mental resources of fathers everywhere. Well no need to be ashamed of your woeful ignorance when it comes to basic science anymore because the crack team of edumactational experts at Uncyclopedia have a selection of possible answers for you.
You've heard the term once in a blue moon right? It basically means something that never happens, well this is because the moon is only blue during the day and the moon isn't visible during the day, this is because during the day the moon is on the other side of the earth, however the blue light from the moon colours the daytime sky blue, simple really.
People think it's called blue Monday because people don't like Mondays and are thus "Blue". Idiots. OK here goes: God is a clever guy OK, when he was inventing the 7 day week he didn't just pick seven on a whim, you see the earths core actually has a 7 day cycle, from Tuesday to Sunday it slowly builds up pressure then on Monday all the active volcanoes in the world start to emit basically rock that's been heated so much it's turned into steam!! Yes, that hot. And what's the colour of this steam? You guessed it. Blue. This means that it's all the boiled rocks in the atmosphere that make it blue.
edit It's because of those Blue Movies
Now here's a dirty little secret that the liberal commie perverts that control the school system and Hollywood don't want you to know. The sky wasn't always blue, at the beginning of the 20th Century it was pure, virginal, christian white, the around 1910 the sky slowly, so slow most never realised it, started to turn blue, and guess what happened around 1910, you guessed it Hollywood.
During the manufacture of early film used in projectors a great amount of a chemical called Alphazurine was released into the atmosphere (it's a substance used in food colouring these days!).
Now a good Christian pastor called Ian Paisley who felt that he clould use this new invention for good to teach the true meaning of Jesus to people and how he died for their sins (an early Mel Gibson if you like) was greatly troubled by this but using the knowledge of chemistry he had gained whilst working a freedom fighter in his native Ireland he worked out a way to make film that didn't produce the the noxious pollution, it cost slightly more (about 5%) but he felt that it was worth it, of course the liberal and Jewish owned film companies where not run like a good christian company they where not about to cut into their profits so they carried on using the old method.
It was only during Eisenhower's time in office that Richard Nixon realising the harm being done lobbied Ike to change the law and forced Hollywood to change it's ways. Of course by this time a lot of the damage had been done as can be seen in the colour film that was made then BUT it was not too late even then and it looked like by the beginning of this century Gods heaven would once again be pure.
But it was not to be the, the Soviets hated the colour white, during the bloody revolution that brought them to power the royalist forces had been know as "The Whites" and they did want a white sky to return forever mocking their heathen atheistic barbarism, so they started to produce Porno films using the old methods (hence the term "Blue Movies"), helping to harm the nations morals and it's good christian sky, this continued till the fall of communism but by this time the liberals had already started to copy their communist masters and produced porn of their own, with a that it entails!