From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search

Yeah. This stuff's important.

Water is a substance invented in 1987 by two disgruntled supermarket employees who were looking for a way to make women's breasts more visible through T-shirts. It works on any type of shirt, but is most effective on white shirts over bra-less breasts. It has also been adapted for use in riot control and drowning unwanted kittens.

Water is essential to life on Earth. Of course, some organisms don't have lives, so water isn't essential to them.

When too much water is drunk at once, the consumer may die. This is due to a phenomenon known as hyperurination. Hyperurination is a process in which the body produces a great amount of urine and is unable to consume essential dietary nutrients as a consequence of the continuous release of the urine. This quickly leads to fatigue of the ankles from standing, or compression of the buttocks from sitting, and will eventually result in weight-loss, starvation, and death. Hyperurination is generally caused by extreme excess consumption of water, but can also result from withholding urine release during a family road trip. For the latter reason, it is suggested that family members go whenever opportune and always before the longest stretches of the car ride. This is especially true for younger members of the family, because they have weaker bladders and are more prone to hyperurination.

Trivia 100% of humans who drink water end up dead sometime during their life. Scientist have extensively researched water, and found it to be the leading cause of drownings.

Water can also refer to:

This is a disambiguation page, a supposedly helpful navigational aid which nevertheless links to needlessly irrelevant but strangely similarly titled pages.
Personal tools