WTF
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“If WTF doesn't stand for "Wednesday Thursday Friday" or "Wonderful Tact, Friend" or maybe "Where's the Food?", then what the fuck does it stand for?”
“What the Fuck does WTF even mean?”
“Causes great confusion and sometimes anger”
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[edit] Evolution of WTF
WTF?! has been used for many years and undergone many changes. Formally used by noobs everywhere to express their disbelief on how fast they are pwned in Counter-Strike, the expression has seemed to find its way into the vocabulary of the rich and wealthy. It has been used by many celebrities such as Carlos Mencia, George W. Bush, and that friendly old man that follows me everyday from school.
For those familiar with cricket, here is an article to understand WTF. Look at the picture too. It shows a Venus flytrap having lunch. http://www.cricinfo.com/ci-icc/content/current/story/417052.html
[edit] Events Leading Up To The WTF! Attacks
Colonel Sanders had already been sought in connection with several attacks throughout the countryside, information brought to the FBI and CIA indicated he had been behind the attack on the coal and an earlier attack on the World Trade Farmyard which caused minimal damage.
Attempts to kill or assassinate Colonel Sanders were hindered by him being one step ahead of his hunters. No matter where in the world he was sought all that remained at the K.F.C. outlets was Colonel Sanders propaganda. Sanders used his family's wealth from chickens to equip and train a unit of Kamikaze Fundamentalist Chickens to pay back the farmer for his cruelty and teach him a lesson.
The chickens began their attack by infiltrating the farmyard, several warning signs given by the farmers dog were ignored by the new management of the farm and this resulted in them going to ground and beginning their training in Ernest.
Ernest was the first of two crop-duster biplanes (the other was Delilah) used in the early morning attack. Indications that the chickens might be practising flight and takes off with little to no concern for landings were passed to field agents (mostly cows) who issued warnings to the Farmer who dismissed the warnings as "not detailed enough to make policy decisions". The fact that these warnings were communicated multiple times makes this a little hard to accept.
The aircraft took off shortly after 7am and were seen circling the barn at approximately 8am just as the cows were being milked. At 8.33 on that morning the first aircraft impacted the barn. Fourteen minutes later the second aircraft crashed into the second level of the barn and the building began its collapse.
[edit] Aftermath of the WTF! Attacks
Most of the world watched the second aircraft crashing into the barnyard on the Cable News Networks. Fox News reporters were present (there are rumours that they were attempting to sneak into the barnyard coop in an attempt to catch some candid shots of farmyard favourites Ben Affleck and his latest chick).
Several cows and up to thirty sheep were killed in the attack. One old donkey and nearly one hundred chickens were wounded or suffered shock from their close proximity to the act of terrorism. Quick thinking by the big-handed farm boy helped reduce damage to surrounding buildings. The farmer's wife was killed instantly as the fuel ignited but the farmer survived the initial impact but was seen running around screaming "EEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee" for several minutes until he died from his horrific wounds.
After the smoke cleared the damage was assessed, over $1,337 worth of damage had been done to the farm. Several buildings had to be demolished due to structural damage caused by secondary explosions.
[edit] World Reaction to the Event
Around the world support was offered - disaster relief agencies went into over drive and several nations pledged to assist in any way to ensure that the evildoers were punished for their crimes. Colonel Sanders was suspected of being behind the attacks but family members of the farmer indicated that this was an ideal opportunity to go after a completely unrelated farm down the way which had once picked on the farmer.
Captain Manatee of the Moose Jaw Red Cross donated 300 copies of Betty and Veronica comic books to the efforts.
Eyelashes were plucked for free at most Roman Catholic churches in the upper Michigan area. The Surrey Club elected a new chancellor to reflect their new perception of the 21st Century Rainbow upon hearing news of the events.
potato
[edit] Reactions in Foreign and Domestic Policy
[edit] aka Squandering International Goodwill
The farmers extended family soon entered into a blood feud with the farm down the way which caused many deaths and terrific amounts of debt and unhappiness. The family of the deceased farmer justified this action by stating that "...they were bringing freedom to the animals of the farm down the way...", little realising that this was exactly the same reasoning given by Colonel Sanders and his K.F.C. suicide bombers. There are rumours that the farm farther down the street is next.
BACAH!
[edit] You know you're WTF when...
- ...you think ROFL is short for waffle
- ...It's been a day since you submit something on VFH
- ...and you're infamous within the society
- ...you are redundant redundant redundant redundant redundant
- ...your coffee explodes
- ...there is acid on your butt
- ...you experience deja vu
- ...everybody cares
- ...your fridge is running
- ...you managed to catch it
- ...you're a noob
- ...on ice, get it? Ice?
- ...the previous line was funny
- ...OMGBBQ without the WTF
- ...Uncyclopedia is interesting
- ...Encyclopedia Dramatica is interesting
- ...Wikipedia is interesting
- ...you manage to mash an adult rat against your forehead
- ...you know JavaScript's ins and outs
- ...you drive a car made out of wood
- ...life is out in the clothing business
- ...this article gets featured
- ...a lamp cares about your life
- ...someone finds Fred The Monkey funny
- ...someone finds ED funny
- ...Blender is simple
- ...BENSON EATS YOU
- ...Chuck Norris is Featured (wait, what?)
- ...Hardwick Fundlebuggy is a buggy
- ...Zombiebaron is an actual baron, bäroning zombies
- ...hümõr iśń't śhöćkińg ör ińćómpréhéńšiblè liké it üšèd tö bè
- ...King Kong wants you dead for 90 bucks
- ...you are an Uncyc Sysop.
- ...That sheep you bought the other day turns a mysterious shade of lilac
- ...you know how long Englebert Humpherdinck's dick is
- ...you're parents gave you your last name as your first name too (ex. Luis Orson Luis)
- ...you actually like the idea of having your last name as you're first name
- ...you Went To France
- ...it's the international holiday of frog-whacking.
- ...you realize you didn't actually come out of your mom's vagina but instead you came out of her ass
- ...it's weasel stomping day.
- ...you've read the whole list and it hits you that it's actually real people who have wasted their time on this crap
- ...you LMAO
- ...you just lost the game.
- ...Pocahontas ate your liver
- ...YOU WANT IT BACK!
- ...you catsup
- ...you think clocks should be orange
- ...you just masturbated to fawlty towers
- ...you get Rick Rolled
- ...your cat eats soup
- ...your mom.
- ...Kuotaitatrea is your new name
- ...you begin to realise that your still reading this list
- ...Wow, you actually read this one too... WTF
- ...you start to think that Bob Saget is a good actor.
- ...Then you start to wonder who wrote that.
- ...and this one.
- ...and this one.
- ...L0LWut.
- ...you experience deja vu
- ...you actually watch 2 girls 1 cup. And enjoy it
- ...you have an affinity towards mudkips.
- ...you realize that you have wasted three hours of your life reading this article then you check to see if you actually wasted 3 hours
- ...every other thing you say is a quote from Grand Theft Auto
- ...you think the rhythmic brand is real
- ...when you actually believe that Chuck Norris is God
- ...[The user who made the previous comment has been disintegrated by Chuck Norris for fabricating such bologna. Chuck Norris stared straight into his eyes so deeply that it penetrated his mind, filling it with the sheer awesomeness of Mr. Norris and instantly making his head]
- ...asplode
- ...when you run around going "SPLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!"
- ...when you stick your hand in a blender
- ...when you actually finish this list... nerd
- ...when you make another list to be special.
- ...when you pull a Sloppy Mr. Freezy and like it
[edit] See also
- What the fuck?
- Whiskey Tango Foxtrot WHAT THE FLOOPSKIES?! what's this doing here...
- Wednesday - Thursday - Friday - The 3 days of WTF





