User talk:WesMan20

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edit Pre-Rendered Welcome!

Hello, WesMan20, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left...Not that far, dammit! ...Yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for nooblets:

If you read anything at all, make it the above two links, particularly the second one. If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, try these:

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button (Button sig) above the edit box. This will automatically produce your username, a link to your userpage, the date, and your social security number. Really, there are only two rules, just make sure you take a brief look at them.

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Dump, or add the following: {{help}} to this page along with a message and someone who cares will come along and help you if they can. Additionally, the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply put {{adoptme}} on your Userpage to join--but you might want to go and actively ask someone from here, or you might not be noticed. Again, welcome to the machine


edit Hello

Hello there. I added the news and date part to the top of your NOI piece so that it would appear in the UnNews list. I assumed you forgot. I hope that's okay. Sean.hoyland - tak() 15:21, 23 February 2008 (UTC)

edit Good article dude

Smuggler UnNews Shot

Thou art brave and talented WesMan!

Hey, the housing article was short, sweet, and good.

Good work.

Smuggler

edit Hya Wesman

Good Unnews pieces you have there. Take a look at the main UnNews page, got a surprise there. One thing though, you have some formatting issues, check the fixes I've made into your articles. I'm sure that Zim_ulator, lord of all UnNews will welcome you as soon as he's around. Till then, drop me a line if you need help and good luck. ~Jewriken.GIF 10:18, 25 February 2008 (UTC)

edit UnNews:Bai-Ling Gual Now Believed To Only Speak One Language

Just wanted to say excellent subject! And nicely done. Ta ta Mightydandylion 15:14, 17 March 2008 (UTC) 15:13, 17 March 2008 (UTC)

Of course! I'll get on it ASAP. If it's not an inconvenience, would you be so kind to put it up on Pee Review? I'd very much like to add another review under my belt.
By the way, "A stunning revelation came forth early yesterday afternoon, when it came to light that a single white man, advised by a small council, was indeed the clandestine ruler of the entire planet, as had long been suspected by many, particularly African-Americans." Wow. Hahaha! Beautiful. Mightydandylion 16:23, 17 March 2008 (UTC)
Thanks again for putting up your article on pee review. I'll get it done sometime today or tomorrow. I also read over "Hell Nah": you should really put that up on Pee review. It made me laugh, haha. Take care, Mightydandylion 19:53, 17 March 2008 (UTC)

edit Hey WesMan

Firstly, thanks! Good luck on your article, I really enjoyed reviewing it.
Secondly, templates: would you like to make your own templates or use templates or maybe even both? If that's the case, find any preexisting template within Uncyclopedia that suits your fancy (to my understanding, template-making is glorified plagiarism). For example, Uncyclopedia:Templates provides some base templates you could use. All you have to do is find a template you'd like to start off with as a foundation. If you want to incorporate a picture into your template, try to find a template that already has an image embedded in the code. After that, it's just a matter of substituting your image over the original image. Let's take a look at my pee review template:
Aubergine

Behold! A flowering perennial of most becoming prodigious-ity has taken root. Sensitive sinus sufferers beware: this article is under the green thumb of

|, Mightydandylion!

You notice that there is a part that says Aubergine.jpg, that's where you would substitute your picture say "Apples.jpg". After that, it's just a matter of experimentation with the code: don't be afraid to change text, numbers, fonts, alignments, and anything. You've got the preview button to allay any fears.
Hope this helps! If you need any more help, just ask! Take care, Mightydandylion 17:53, 19 March 2008 (UTC)

edit UnNews: I'm Sorry

Hey WesMan20,

I'll get on it ASAP. I still have to get another article revdiewed. Take care! Mightydandylion Icons-flag-us (talk) Fk 20:19, 24 March 2008 (UTC)

"The Man also floored everyone in the room with the most stunning of all of his many revelations to blacks – that he (not the CIA) was responsible for releasing crack and HIV/AIDS into the black community in a “Tuskeegee-esque” experiment. “We wanted to see if we could really destroy you guys from the inside out, and boy did we succeed”, he mused smugly. “I mean, damn!”, he continued with a chuckle. He then immediately composed himself and added, “But seriously, that was really bad of me.” Very good. Creative too. I loled. The conspiratorial development is reaching a fevered pitch with the revelation that even HIV/AIDS was tool for population control. What's particularly tickling is the dialogue of The Man.
"Blacks and reparations weren’t the only grievances addressed for redress by The Man. Hippies were alerted to the fact that ‘Burning Man’, an annual event in the Nevada desert at which prostitutes are hired to infect one lucky man with gonorrhea, was really just a ploy to get as many hippies as possible into one place for as long as possible, where they could be monitored while authorities searched their homes. This is part of an annual event for authorities called “Searching Man”, unbeknownst to hippies, where evidence is gathered on liberals by conservative authorities and is passed on to God for use in his impending judgment." Very, very creative. Elicited a smile. Paragraph anticipates the introduction of The Man's several exchanges with other historically shafted peoples. Still, while I'm not sure if it enhances the article, the paragraph certainly does not detract from it.
"The Man refused to apologize to Native Americans for the introduction of alcohol to their community, however, citing their casinos as a redress. “We exploited your vice, now I’m letting you exploit ours. We’re even.” Clever. Elicited a smile. Interestingly, the line suggests a tone of annoyance as opposed to remorse.
"He did apologize to the northern Inuits, though, for several racist infractions, such as creating the force field that keeps them from entering into the warmer climates of North America where Europeans are more often found." Haha, how silly.
“We got along in Iceland, but we just really got greedy in the Americas, and I'm sorry”, The Man admitted, which got a warm response." Just a question: was the warm response intentional? If so, how silly.
"He did not say whether the force field would be lifted in the near future. When the Inuits asked about reparations for having to have lived on seal meat and having been forced to build homes out of ice (the very source of their discomfort), The Man changed the subject." Elicited a smile.
Excellent, absolutely excellent WesMan20: it's a welcome kick in the pants to read your stuff. Thank you for sharing it with me! However, glowing praise from one person is all well and good; but glowing praise from two people is even better! May one suggest taking it up to Pee Review for another go? Take care, Mightydandylion Icons-flag-us (talk) Fk 21:38, 26 March 2008 (UTC)
Thanks for the shower WesMan20! Of course they are true! Also, a "kick in the pants" is my way of saying that the article has made an impression---and of course a favorable one, haha. Concerning the pee review problem: I believe one has to resubmit the article with "2nd submission/2nd opinion/or 2nd something-of-the-like" accompanying it. Take care, Mightydandylion Icons-flag-us (talk) Fk 03:53, 27 March 2008 (UTC)
Another option you have is to take the current Pee Review table, cut it out of the PR page, paste it to your talk page under a header such as "From Pee Review", and paste a fresh copy onto the review page.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 22:05, 31 March 2008 (UTC)

edit Hey WesMan!

Where have you gone? Come baaaaccckkkkkkk Mightydandylion Icons-flag-us (talk) Fk 01:05, 11 April 2008 (UTC)

lol, never mind. Just saw your thread over at the forums. Mightydandylion Icons-flag-us (talk) Fk 01:10, 11 April 2008 (UTC)
Oho! Excellent picture. Made me laugh. Good luck with your endeavors! And take care, Mightydandylion Icons-flag-us (talk) Fk 15:01, 11 April 2008 (UTC)

edit Crack

Hya, sorry for the long delay. I like the way it's going. Perhaps you can change "the man" to a political/historical figure. Also, you need to work a bit on the formatting and change the pictures (you do know how to ask for a pic at UN:PIC right?) and maybe put a section on how to make your own at your house? Just some thoughts. But it's looking good! ~Jewriken.GIF 20:46, 19 April 2008 (UTC)

Hey WesMan! I'll get around to giving this article the comb-through in a couple week's time. Mightydandylion Icons-flag-us (talk) Fk 00:24, 27 April 2008 (UTC)

edit Nice ta meetcha

Thanks for the heads up about signing articles. Curiously, how do I prove to a friend that I wrote it (originally)? Sorry to be such an egoist, that's just how I masturbate... Mentally... --WesMan20 19:42, 25 February 2008 (UTC)WesMan20

Sorry for taking so long getting back to you. You probably know by now that an article's history will show who wrote and edited it. Anyway, here's a little something for you:

edit welcome to UnNews

Che Ape

Reverend Zim_ulator says: "There are coffee cup stains on this copy, damnit! Now that's good UnJournalism."

Welcome to UnNews, WesMan20, and thank you for contributing some crap, or otherwise attracting my attention. For a quick introduction about how you can write a decent or better UnNews article, please take a minute read our spiffy new Style Guide.

I am your humble servant (in your dreams), and if I may be of help to you, please leave me a note on my talk page.

Good things that can happen to you

You can win awards and prizes! You can become a better writer by subjecting your articles to the scrutiny of UnNews critique machine or UnCanninator shit article detection system. You can become a thorn in the side of Journalism as a whole. You can get promotions, ribbons, and free crockery! You can write stuff your mom would be ashamed to show her friends.

What happened to my article?

If you've submitted an article, and it's disappeared, I may have mercy-moved it to your user space. This means I've probably left a message on your talk page, likely in close proximity to this very message, explaining why.

Your article may have been tagged for ICU if it has significant problems meeting our criteria, or I may have deleted it because you did not register as a user.

Finally, maybe you just pissed me off. I mean, I know I'm a Roshi, and I'm supposed to be all "Zen" about everything, but I have bad days too, you know?

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This document is an ongoing effort by me to enhance the obfuscation coefficient of Uncyclopedia; productive changes, and criticism are welcome. Cheers! The Right and Left Reverend Major Sir Zimbuddha Rev. Zim (Talk) Get saved! 17:38, March 28, 2010 (UTC)

edit Hello

I see that my article is on the right-hand side front page of UnNews. I'm still a n00b, so does this mean it is Quasi-Featured?--WesMan20 03:59, 16 March 2008 (UTC)WesMan20

I am the de facto decider in the case of elevating certain articles to Lead status. In fact, my standards for promoting stories is mostly to keep the headlines cycling, a way to tell the world that we at UnNews are as good as any of the pretenders, like Yahoo!, or Microsoft. The illusion of up-to-the-second updating is but one of our little tricks to opiatise the masses. It's mostly done by me, or other admins, or users who've been around UnNews a while. If you'd like to whore your story, even if it's not fresh, let me know, If I find it suitable, I'll lube it up and make it grab it's ankles as a lead story. It's not really so much an honor to be featured, as it is to say, "you've done a decent story, or it's been edited to become such".

That wasn't very helpful, was it? Ah, well, best I can do this time of day during a rain storm. Cheers Zimbuddha Rev. Zim (Talk) Get saved! 22:51, 9 May 2008 (UTC)

edit Ahoy WesMan20!

Good to hear from you! Well, firstly I do hope everything works out well for you. Secondly, thank you for taking the time to drop a message. And thirdly, I look forward to reading your stuff! Please keep me posted and don't be a stranger!


Also, Godspeed with those world-changers. :) Mightydandylion Icons-flag-us (talk) Fk 21:07, 14 August 2008 (UTC)

edit UnSignpost: August 14th, 2008

Fired out of a newspaper cannon by: SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 17:52, 16 August 2008 (UTC)

edit Join the UnOrder Today!

~ Readmesoon

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edit Hey!

Hey, guess what? I've been nominated for an UnNews award! Can you go check out the nominees and if I'm better, vote for me? If the other guys better vote for him! Thx! Smuggler! http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Uncyclopedia:Foolitzer_Prize

edit Hello!

Long time, no write! And out of the blue, boom! A news article! How's it goin'? ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usFri, Nov 23 '12 13:49 (UTC)

Yes, yes I did enjoy it. "I'm a goshdarn Mormon for Smith's Sake!" XD  ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usSat, Nov 24 '12 5:41 (UTC)
Also, welcome back! ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usSat, Nov 24 '12 5:46 (UTC)
Awesome. I look forward your upcoming paperback release, "Ten Ways to Make Yourself Famous With the Help of Uncyclopedia." (It'll be one page long, and consist of the single sentence "You can't.", but it will still be awesome and I will buy all ten thousand copies.) ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usSun, Nov 25 '12 8:31 (UTC)
Uh oh. Tim to tak out anothr loan with th Russian mafia. I sur hop thy lt m kp my othr fingrs. ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usSun, Nov 25 '12 21:39 (UTC)

edit RE: Funny Stuff

Why thank you. I pulled all that out of my ass. Glad somebody thought it was funny. xD--AtheistJesus (talk) 01:12, November 25, 2012 (UTC)

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