User talk:V V I P

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edit Law of Averages

Hello and welcome! This is a promising first contribution! Please read it over and correct the writing mistakes. Also perhaps get some friends to read it; if some of the sentences were phrased better, they would communicate more clearly. Happy editing! Spıke ¬ 13:32 8-Apr-13

Sorry if there were some mistakes, English isn't my first language :( Also sorry for the lack of content, I was kind of rushing for this article to publish and show it to my friends. Anyway thanks for your comment:) V V I P (talk) 15:14, April 8, 2013 (UTC)V V I P

Given that, it's pretty good. What is your first language? You might create a user page to tell us more about yourself. Several people here are happy to help people with their English--but we hope it is for the benefit of Uncyclopedia--meaning, we hope you create more stuff! But first, keep working on this one; especially, re-read it carefully for singular/plural. Later, perhaps even add illustrations! Spıke ¬ 15:24 8-Apr-13

I am South Korean, but I have lived in several different countries besides South Korea, so I am much better at English than Korean. Thanks for the advice by the way :) V V I P (talk) 15:46, April 8, 2013 (UTC)V V I P

An impressive combination of cultures. But the article is not getting better:

  • The first-person/second-person does not sound encyclopedic, and your article doesn't have a concept that calls for it. I know you might want to be on stage talking to an audience, but to make stuff fit in Uncyclopedia, it has to read like an encyclopedia article, not a personal scolding!
  • Given that this article will be mostly visited by mathematicians, the discussion of fucking Megan Fox might not amuse the audience. Perhaps you get a kick out of swearing at strangers, but see above regarding looking like an encyclopedia entry. Clean it up.
  • Likewise all the "or does it?" Some day you can create an entire article whose joke is that the writer is unsure of himself, or swears a lot. In this article, you already had a simple joke, which you need to develop fully: the fallacy of thinking that a series of bad outcomes forces a good outcome in the future. Indecision and vulgarity, in this article, are just distractions for the reader.
  • And you still haven't done the copy-edit: "is one of the law", "groups of student". Spıke ¬ 16:21 8-Apr-13
Hello, Spike. I just wanted to ask you something about the article. If it's possible, can you give the article more time to be edited? I am afraid that I have some personal matters to take care of, and I won't have the time to improve the article. Also I certainly don't want to get my creation deleted just because of my short absence. Thanks. V V I P (talk) 19:17, April 8, 2013 (UTC)V V I P

I'll put it in your userspace--at User:V V I P/Law of Averages--so you can talk all the time you need. Spıke ¬ 20:18 8-Apr-13


edit HowTo:Cheat on a test

Proofreading can come later, but right now, you need to change the page name to something that is English: Either "Cheat on a test" or "Cheat on tests". (Avoid excess capital letters in page titles.) Learn how to do this:

  1. Use the Move button next to Unwatch.
  2. The old name will continue to point to the new name, so go to UN:QVFD and submit a request for the old name to be deleted, such as
 HowTo:Cheat on Test (redirect) (delete) -- article renamed by author

Thanks! Spıke ¬ 14:53 21-May-13

Sorry for my horrible English mistakes! Maybe I shouldn't have written an article when I was too drunk :( LaurelsV V I P ® 20:15, May 21, 2013 (UTC)V V I P

Drunk? The really bad articles are where everyone at the tavern writes one sentence. Spıke ¬ 20:44 21-May-13

Well maybe I was too drunk to notice that I wasn't drunk. Anyway I do think that the article need vast improvement on jokes as well as grammar. LaurelsV V I P ® 13:30, May 22, 2013 (UTC)V V I P

There is never a "last-minute rush" here. Except during the occasional competition. Spıke ¬ 13:52 22-May-13

Spike are you going to join in with the competition? Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 17:50, May 22, 2013 (UTC)

It's very surprising (in a good way) that there is some kind of competition on writing funny articles. Nevertheless I think it does help the community to form a stronger "bond" or connection. By the way ScottPat I am sorry for congratulating Anton and not you. I thought the Belgium Mountain Troops article was written by Anton! My mistake:( LaurelsV V I P ® 19:53, May 22, 2013 (UTC) V V I P

Thanks, that's fine. I encourage you to join in with the competition. If all goes to plan it dhould be held in June. It will be very tough. Big names such as Romartus, Shabidoo and Puppy are all showing interest and once Aleister logs back on he'll be on it in a flash (Spike will probably slip an entry in). But as we noobs must accept, "It's the taking part that counts." So in true cavalier spirit I think as many people as possible should have a chance to sing out their finest (hopefully) work. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:57, May 22, 2013 (UTC)

I do think that entering competition is a good thing to do, unfortunately I haven't finish an article yet, which shows my lacking participation. Furthermore even though I did join this community in March~ April (I believe), I had to leave a little while (or maybe a month) due to some personal issues. Now finally I am back and I feel my noobiness just increased hugely. Nevertheless I'll try to get some funny articles up my sleeve. LaurelsV V I P ® 20:15, May 22, 2013 (UTC)V V I P

Back to the article: You were doing well with new material that was yours; but your list of groan-worthy old jokes (to offer as inducement to get a noob to cooperate with you) that are not yours, is not as good. Spıke ¬ 21:12 22-May-13

Then should I delete them all? LaurelsV V I P ® 21:21, May 22, 2013 (UTC)V V I P

It's your article, but personally, I would stick with more original humor. Spıke ¬ 21:33 22-May-13

edit "Really serious"

I am reading your user page now. I am a "resourceful person"? This seems to say I have lots of weapons for my attack. What you mean is that I have lots of weapons for your attack on the battlefield of comedy, so it would sound better to say I am a "good resource." Above that, regarding "Don't get too pissy about my English grammar": If you elect to write for an English-language wiki (for which I have already praised you), and if a reviewer corrects you, the problem is yours, not your reviewer's! So use the contact to improve your grammar; accept corrections, don't warn them away in advance! Cheers! Spıke ¬ 19:06 25-May-13


This page needs to be re-read by professional users. If it does not become better, it will get deleted.


Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:32, May 25, 2013 (UTC)

Just joking... or not. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:33, May 25, 2013 (UTC)
Anton, you are going to start correcting people's English? "Hello, I would like to meet you" always sounds better than, "Hey! your talk page is crap!" By the way, the reason the Abuse Filter interrogated you on inserting a template into your own talk page is that it contained a secret link to someone else's website, which I have now removed. So that won't happen again. (Until we find the next such bomb.) Spıke ¬ 19:44 25-May-13
Ok. I did not say that VVIP's talk page is crap, it was only a joke. And I am not going to start correcting other people's English because mine is not good enough for this. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 20:16, May 25, 2013 (UTC)
No, you did not say that. I was...paraphrasing. But the three of us are from three different parts of the world and we might not always have the context to realize that one another is joking. ScottPat and I are famously from "two nations divided by a common language." (G.B.Shaw) Spıke ¬ 20:34 25-May-13

@Spike : Sorry for my vague "opinion", I should have written much more clearly. For the "resourceful person" part, I meant in a good context, but of course it can be misleading. Furthermore "Don't get too pissy about my English grammar" was a kind of a "joke". It's obvious one needs to focus on English grammar in order to write a decent article. Lastly to address Anton's issue, I think you have over reacted a little by his comment. Anton and I are very close real-life friends and to me it's totally fine to bash one or another. I know it's rude to say "Your article suck" to a person but I think being a close friend of mine eliminates that rule :) Jokes on me :/ LaurelsV V I P ® 21:11, May 25, 2013 (UTC) V V I P

Joke's on me too; I do overreact when a Russian threatens a Korean with deleting a talk page. (Deleting a talk page?) I understood that Anton was joking; as you did too, my peacemaking was unnecessary; carry on. Spıke ¬ 23:17 27-May-13

edit UnSignpost

Just to warn you that you have moved the recent UnSignpost onto your archive talk page. Did you mean to do that? Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 12:08, May 29, 2013 (UTC)

He has finished reading it (and liked it).
By the way, what do you think about the template that I have created?
This is not connected to your talk page, I just wanted to show it to you. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 18:04, May 29, 2013 (UTC)

I don't know whether the question was directed towards me however I have noticed a grammar error in your template I will resolve. Great template. I like it. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:14, May 29, 2013 (UTC)

Whoops. No grammar error sorry. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:17, May 29, 2013 (UTC)

And what about this? I bet Spike will like it more.

User:Anton199/Template:Article2 Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 18:32, May 31, 2013 (UTC)

Maybe although considering that it is Spike in short answer, "No." Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 18:40, May 31, 2013 (UTC)
Scott, I imagine you don't want the above to seem as though you are anticipating my reaction either, right? In fact, it removes all my objections: It expresses a personal opinion rather than seeming to lay down the law regarding staying on the site, it is positive, and it gives the recipient several options, though it continues to convey a bit of urgency (as Anton is watching, and there is just no telling what he will do after he stops merely watching). Spıke ¬ 19:02 31-May-13

edit Summer's here! And so is the post

Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotYSir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:10, June 14, 2013 (UTC)

edit Recent news from old newspapers

Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 20:00, June 27, 2013 (UTC)

edit Hello

I have nominated "A Number" on the VFH. You can also vote for it (or against it, even though it is half yours). How is "Law of Averages" going? And have you watched the movie yet? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 18:09, June 28, 2013 (UTC)

Hello Lieutenant Anton, nice name you got there. I'll vote for the article! Also for the Law of Averages I am trying to improve the article bit by bit, even though the process is not the most astonishing improvement. Unfortunately I couldn't see the movie due to a family "reunion". I'll watch tomorrow or next week. LaurelsV V I P ® 18:28, June 28, 2013 (UTC)V V I P
I also like my name. A while ago it was Corporal but Spike and Scott joked that it was connected to overweight and I decided to change it. By the way, did you see what I had posted a week pr so ago on the Law of Averages talk page? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:07, June 28, 2013 (UTC)
Uuummm? I'm afraid I've missed the message. By the way where is the Law of Averages talk page? (except for the talk with Spike)LaurelsV V I P ® 19:12, June 28, 2013 (UTC)V V I P
Also can you check the picture that I've added on the article "A Number"? I think it can be connected in some way but I am not totally sure. LaurelsV V I P ® 19:14, June 28, 2013 (UTC)V V I P
It is User talk:V V I P/Law of Averages. The picture is good and I changed the comment a little, so it is more connected to the subject. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:39, June 28, 2013 (UTC)

edit If you don't know where to find the news

And here is another one! Happy reading! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:49, July 5, 2013 (UTC)

edit PLS edition of UnSignpost with extra poo

Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 18:20, July 14, 2013 (UTC)

edit Promotion

You got autopatrolled! Don't be scared as it is not a penalty but a kind of promotion. That means that nobody has to review your edits to see if you are a vandal or not. Basically, that's it. But that's still cool! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 12:15, July 16, 2013 (UTC)

What's the meaning of this!... Just joking! Actually this is pretty nice. However don't the admins decide whom 'll be promoted? Or are you just letting me know? LaurelsV V I P ® 12:42, July 16, 2013 (UTC)V V I P
Just letting you know because you might have been frightened after seeing that you were autopatrolled. A scary word. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 13:08, July 16, 2013 (UTC)
Yeah, like the last guy was. V V I P, the change simply means your edits are not flagged for automatic review; you should notice no difference at all. Spıke ¬ 13:19 16-Jul-13
Oh good. Now I understand what "autopatrolled" means with my simple brain. LaurelsV V I P ® 14:34, July 16, 2013 (UTC)V V I P
Invoking "whom 'll" reminds me why I didn't promote you before: That, although you are no vandal, some of your edits might benefit from review. Briefly: (1) There is never a space before 'll; (2) I have never seen "whom'll"; (3) "who" is the subject of a passive verb and there is no call for "whom," which is the accusative case. Probably the reason I have never seen whom'll is that, if whom were the object of a sentence, there would always be a subject or a pronoun separating "whom" from "will": For example, "from whom it will...." Spıke ¬ 14:51 16-Jul-13
I think he just wanted to say "who'll" and made a typo (or what ever it is called). Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 16:09, July 16, 2013 (UTC)
(Just a note to Anton) A "typo" is slang for "type error." It's fine to say but you would not say it in formally (not formerly) spoken English. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 17:02, July 16, 2013 (UTC)
Ok, thanks. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:25, July 16, 2013 (UTC)
Whoops, my mistake. Who'll would be correct, although space before 'll was is just a simple error. LaurelsV V I P ® 17:36, July 16, 2013 (UTC)V V I P
And Anton, you only wrote "what ever" because you had not gotten a lesson yet today, right? Spıke ¬ 17:56 16-Jul-13
I'll take Spike's comment as a joke before I comment on the horrendous use of the verb "to get" in his comment. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 18:00, July 16, 2013 (UTC)
True, I had not gotten a lesson. But can't you do it both ways: whatever and what ever? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 18:38, July 16, 2013 (UTC)
No you cannot (not "can not" in case you didn't know). Whatever/whichever/everyone/someone/cannot are all examples of ones you can't do both ways and no one in English uses the two-word way (i.e. not slang either). Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 18:46, July 16, 2013 (UTC)
Looking at the conversations I think we can deduce the fact that we are all Grammar Nazis, not that it's a bad thing. LaurelsV V I P ® 20:19, July 16, 2013 (UTC)V V I P
My 1975 American Heritage Dictionary ("American" not being a synonym for "horrendous") lists gotten (second behind got) as a perfect participle of get. Also, incidentally: Despite anyone, anyplace, anyway, I don't like anymore (I prefer "any more") but the dictionary shows anymore, and with no scolding Usage Note. There is no support in The Elements of Grammar, either, though there is a warning against anywheres. Spıke ¬ 20:26 16-Jul-13
This may be a fake encyclopedia, but the lessons, from smooth collaboration to correct use of the language, are real and useful. Spıke ¬ 20:28 16-Jul-13
"Gotten" is fine to say however I was complaining about the use of the verb with your noun. "To get a lesson" does not make any sense. You could "learn a lesson" and "get given a lesson" but not "get a lesson" unless you say "I've got a lesson now" but then the past would be "I had a lesson" not "I was gotten a lesson." Perhaps you meant "given" instead of "gotten." Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 21:17, July 16, 2013 (UTC)
"Gotten" here is fine as a synonym for "received." You will be pleased to hear that the cashier at the supermarket was concerned that my bagging instructions might result in a tomato getting "squuooshed" (like "smooshed") (the vowel as in "would"). Spıke ¬ 21:29 16-Jul-13
OK. I actually see how it is correct now however it is not something that would be said by my colloquial age group or class. I could imagine an upper-class, old Englishman saying it or an American but it is not Modern English over here. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 06:41, July 17, 2013 (UTC)

edit Sorry for the USP

I am sorry but the new format of the UnSignpost makes the content box and the edit buttons of the talk page disappear. Therefore, I am removing it for a while and will bring it back when these issues are fixed. But you can still read this issue at UnSignpost/20130810. Thank you for your patience! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 12:01, August 13, 2013 (UTC)

Finally the UnSignpost looks professional with its new design! Though I've always thought that it would be much better if a single link is posted which redirects to the new UnSignpost (just like you did in my talk page), not the whole news. Even though you can hide the whole section about the post, I think "clicking a single directed link to UnSignpost" is much cleaner format. For exmaple, you can create a section on one's talk page where a new UnSignpost link is posted every week rather than filling up the space by creating new headlines thus feeling the need to put into the archives. LaurelsV V I P ® 20:30, August 14, 2013 (UTC)V V I P
It is actually a nice idea... I will think of that and post a message on the Subscribe page, so all the users who want to have a simple link will write that in the list of the subscribers. Thanks! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 15:52, August 15, 2013 (UTC)

edit Problems, considering the UnSignpost

If you care about what we deliver to you, please, take a look at this forum and vote if you can! Your opinion is very important! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:22, August 19, 2013 (UTC)

Yup I have voted for it. By the way did you send this to all UnSignPost readers? And how about ScottPat's thought?

PS : I would like to be credited for the idea if it's possible :) LaurelsV V I P ® 17:29, August 19, 2013 (UTC)V V IP

Oh, yeah, sure. I posted the same message to almost all the readers apart from those who are not active at all. And which ScottPat's thought? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:34, August 19, 2013 (UTC)
I thought he was the head of the UnSignPost? If so, his opinion must be important. LaurelsV V I P ® 17:36, August 19, 2013 (UTC)V V I P
Oh, sorry, I just did not read your comment carefully. I told him about this, of course, and apologized for doing all this stuff alone, even though he is the head. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:45, August 19, 2013 (UTC)

edit It is back!

Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 12:40, August 28, 2013 (UTC)

edit UnSignpost - Delivered every [other] week!

Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 11:19, August 29, 2013 (UTC)

edit UnSygnposte Delieverie

Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 09:19, September 15, 2013 (UTC)

edit UnSignpost - Reporting from the Belgian Congo

Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:56, September 30, 2013 (UTC)

edit When a single post can become a source for drama, a newspaper becomes a deadly weapon

Have fun reading it!

Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:49, October 21, 2013 (UTC)

edit Constantly changing and not evolving newspaper - the UnSignpost

Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:29, October 31, 2013 (UTC)

edit Who said 'late'?

Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:26, December 17, 2013 (UTC)

edit The last UnSignpost of the year

Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 21:15, December 29, 2013 (UTC)

edit The first UnSignpost of the year

That time I was nearly caught reading the UnSignpost, so now I am delivering it to you! Have a nice time reading it! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:59, February 18, 2014 (UTC)

edit The UnSignpost is back from holiday

We have not forgotten about you (yet)! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 16:05, March 28, 2014 (UTC)

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