User talk:Simsilikesims

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edit Unpatrolled edits

So, do you think that the edits of Samarias 14 would be funny if a reader were a fan of the bands in question? Or is he an unpaid roadie flogging a grudge? Spıke Ѧ 17:20 9-May-14

According to Wikipedia, Sebastian Bach opened for Axl Rose but they were never in a relationship. I don't think that simply making up something untrue is funny, and I doubt that this would be funny to a fan of the band Guns N Roses. Accordingly, I am reverting it. The contribution to the Oasis article is too self-contradictory to be funny - they either were spotted or the paparazzi made the false rumor up. If they were spotted it wouldn't be just a rumor. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 18:55, May 9, 2014 (UTC)
So contradiction can't be funny? And insulting bands can't be funny? The whole point of this site is to be funny and sometimes insulting bands/people/places and countries can be. If you can't do it here, then what the hell is the point of this website? So typical that an American would not see the subtleties of humor. You know what subtle means right? I mean being American and all. The preceding unsigned comment was added by Samarias 14 (talk • contribs)
He blanked your talk page to post the above, for which I banned him for 3 days. You are welcome to override me. Spıke Ѧ 20:26 9-May-14
Samarias, contradiction can be funny. Less often, delivering insults can be done in a funny way. The question is not whether humor exists, but whether you can be funny. A separate question, given your reaction to one of the many reverts you will experience in your time as an Uncyclopedian, is whether you can be part of a joint writing project. Spıke Ѧ 20:29 9-May-14

edit Realperson721

Two nights ago, you gave patient advice to Realperson721, but mentioned in passing that a recent user had been banned from the site (referring to the above episode). But that ban was not for inability to be funny, but that combined with unwillingness to talk about it, plus finally, rage that there are any limits on his ability to amuse himself by vandalizing the site, and Realperson had not (yet) evidenced this. In fact, he did reply with "O.U" — which I assume means something. He has now reached that advanced level, blanking his own talk page (undone by me) to leave a rant about how bossy Admins are. Likewise Unbeatsr (undone by ScottPat).

Unlike what you may read on ICU, what is happening here is not everyone leaving because there are too many bans; but our limited resources being used on helping new users who resent it. I don't anticipate banning either of these, as they didn't blank someone else's page but at most failed to read the welcome message clearly, but they are on a short leash, and I am wondering which elementary-school bathroom, or back of a seat in a short bus, our URL has been carved into, as we are getting these three-at-a-time.

Separately, a new article on Gluten desperately needs help which you are eminently able to provide. Author attached his own {{ICU}}. ("Stop me before I edit again!") Spıke Ѧ 12:12 17-May-14

I think it's me who attached ICU to Gluten. But, maybe you are confusing this case with the one of United States presidential election, 1788-1789, where the author attached {Stub} to his own work. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 12:51, May 17, 2014 (UTC)

Looks like I did. Spıke Ѧ 13:10 17-May-14

Simsie, I knew you would rise to the challenge! Separately, the short bus has pulled up again and disgorged ThatJosh (whom I've already reverted at Nigel Farage and delivered {{Oh Dear}}, ineffectively), and Taladosian. If I administer, the usual will happen, so I leave them in your hands, but am about to put the Red Sox on and will be checking in all evening if you need a Heavy. Spıke Ѧ 23:46 18-May-14

I will keep an eye on them, but I may not be on for very long today since I am at a friend's house. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 23:51, May 18, 2014 (UTC)

Oh, right, it's Saturday. No, wait, it isn't. Spıke Ѧ 00:10 19-May-14

edit Have you forgotten about the UnSignpost's anniversary?

Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:33, May 20, 2014 (UTC)

edit Cheers on your advice to the newbies

I had the same notions as you have expressed, particularly on Mountaindewguy7, though I found myself wrestling with the Nuke button so went off on errands instead. Master TheWikiMan026 has had some notoriously unhelpful advice for Everyotherusernamewastaken but I have suggested that the two might benefit from a collaboration. Spıke Ѧ 23:48 26-May-14

edit Sprites are back

Sprites are back if you are running with JavaScript and Images on. It isn't the correct sprite, and it doesn't actually do anything, but that is negotiable if anyone cares, which they probably don't. Spıke Ѧ 18:04 28-May-14

edit Washington (state)

This article is a horror show — an interminable list of the state's cities and why they all just suck. You might be able to repair it. Spıke Ѧ 01:16 2-Jun-14

Actually, I wrote some of the Seattle section there, as well as the Sequim and Puyallup sections. Other people came along and added their own material about other Washington State towns. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 04:11, June 4, 2014 (UTC)

edit HMC

Hey sims. When was the last time you participated in a writing competition (writing or judging)? :) --ShabiDOO 23:36, June 3, 2014 (UTC)

Well, let's see, there was the noob competition a couple years ago, there were supposed to be three to seven judges but I was the only one who judged all 30 entries, which didn't help give the noobs balanced feedback on their articles. I was also writing for the PLS two years in a row, one entry I wrote was Carbohydrate (a notoriously poor topic choice in retrospect), and the second year I wrote Spider solitaire after inspiration hit during the contest. Lately I just haven't felt inspired, and I'm busy IRL on weekends and on two days out of the five weekdays (three days if you count my laundry day, but then again I can write while the washer and dryer are running). Also, sometimes my router doesn't cooperate and then my computer is offline until it starts cooperating again, hours or a couple days later. Right now my router is shutting out my ipad but my computer is online. Other times, it shuts out the computer but the ipad is online, but it is hard to write a full length article on a mobile device, especially with the infernal spell correct feature that I almost never need anyways (I was district alternate in my 7th grade spelling bee). Generally I'm not good at banging out good material in short periods of time unless inspiration hits. If I could rely on my internet connection being consistent I would participate, but given the short time period of this contest, I think I better skip this one. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 04:33, June 4, 2014 (UTC)
Oh yeah I LOVE spider solitaire I remember reading it and laughing out loud. I wish you'd expand it just a little more and then I'd nominate it at VFH! --ShabiDOO 13:59, June 4, 2014 (UTC)

edit Phoenix and Tucson

Would you please take a second look at the recent changes to Phoenix, Arizona and Tucson, Arizona and patrol/revert/edit? The contributions of PestyMark seem more like travel blog plus criticism than humor.

Also the unpatrolled addition to Battle of Hampton Roads. The author thanked me for my observation that any humor is barely perceptible, then did nothing about it. Spıke Ѧ 19:26 14-Jun-14

Also, there is a new edit to The Sims which, of course, I leave to you. Spıke Ѧ 15:47 15-Jun-14

edit Monkeys

Thank you very much for your save vote on poop throwing monkeys. If they could speak they'd say things we wouldn't want to hear, but if I could speak for them I'd say 'Thank You' in chimp language. Your deed will reverberate through the halls of uncy, or at least the room where we keep them. I am but a humble servant of the poop throwing monkeys, Aleister 12:14 26-6-14

Indeed, this was a case of the title of the article being both a title and a punchline, but not obviously so at first, because the last of the poop throwing monkeys was the anthropologist. I remember when this article came out, and found it amusing then, and I don't think it has lost its charm entirely. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 06:27, June 27, 2014 (UTC)

edit UnBooks:Church of St. Knock-Knock Agenda and Prayer Book

I would very much like it if you reviewed this. Please read what's there now; there probably isn't enough for good feedback, and if you are of this opinion then you could wait while I update it.--Sigphoto|(get dtf) 13:23, July 4, 2014 (UTC)

It has an unfinished feel to it. I see you are trying to cross a knock-knock joke book with a church service. It almost works, but the jokes just aren't that funny, and only loosely associated with churchy things. Maybe I'm not into knock knock jokes as much as I used to be. Probably from hearing the same knock knock jokes over and over, and retelling the same ones over and over. Work on it some more and then let me know. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 22:12, July 7, 2014 (UTC)

edit Ruddy's Harry and the UnSignpost!

Sir ScottPat (converse) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 09:45, July 15, 2014 (UTC)

edit MillieEoff

Sorry, I deleted your welcome of this user. A user anxious to briefly tell us exact details about him-and-herself — which neither hang together nor match the chosen username — and with a link to an external website or a web search to perform, is not an authentic Uncyclopedian but a spambot who visits almost nightly. Another tip-off (not present this time) is sprinkling bizarre Unicode characters in ordinary text. Spıke Ѧ 12:33 18-Jul-14

edit Forum:Our own IRC channel?

Please reactivate it as I would like to add something. Sir TheWikiMan026 CUN,UmP, (Chatter) Norn Iron Flag 11:50, July 25, 2014 (UTC)

What did you want to add? Most of our users are not likely to use the IRC channel. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 00:07, July 26, 2014 (UTC)
I don't know if I should bring this up, but the truth is that we technically do have an IRC channel. The one created by Denza - ##uncyclopedia. After it was voted down in the penultimate forum on the subject, Denza himself left it and so it's abandoned now. But the point is that we do have it, so those who want to use it can, if someone was to supervise it. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 13:03, July 29, 2014 (UTC)
I am not against an IRC channel or something similar but there is always the danger (in my view) that the IRC channel ends up as the tail that wags the dog. I will leave my Wikia details on my talk page if people want to chat there. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 13:18, July 29, 2014 (UTC)

edit User:Puncherofbears

The user also complained on my talk page about my deletion of his article, after which I restored it to his userspace. (He also used Uncyclopedia:Report a problem to report a problem with me, to-wit, that deleting his article constituted "harassment.") 23:14 Oops, looks like you found that too. Spıke Ѧ 23:16 27-Jul-14

Oscars remains the only recent edit that is not marked patrolled. It is not Anon's addition but the three paragraphs of lists — an especially tedious way of telling the "joke" that greater directors have been passed over in favor of lesser ones. Also, VFD misses you. Spıke Ѧ 23:26 27-Jul-14

edit ShellieDaddario‎

This new user did not cross the line for banning, that is, having her first edit include gibberish plus links to her blog; but if you Google the name, you see that she did so on another wiki, and otherwise has no web presence. So I think she is a spambot and have deleted your welcome of her. Spıke Ѧ 03:07 31-Jul-14

Separately, RabidBadger163248, whom you also welcomed, had one contribution: A massive file, possibly from an anime, that he did not put to use and I deleted. Spıke Ѧ 03:15 31-Jul-14

Fair enough. I had my suspicions about ShellieDaddario but wanted to give the benefit of the doubt. I did not, however, check Google. Interesting name though, perhaps one of the Sims in my game will be given this name. Maybe it will be a Plumbot (robotic) sim. I noticed you had deleted RabidBadger's file, but don't know how quickly it was deleted after it was uploaded. Perhaps it was uploaded before it could be used in a planned article. In any event, the beginner's guide should have some useful info for him on what this site is and is'nt. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 03:22, July 31, 2014 (UTC)

My curiosity was piqued when Shellie filed a pointlessly generic self-introduction but didn't go the rest of the distance to finish an advertisement. But she did so elsewhere. There are very few edits left to patrol, but one is from Anon. He has made a couple of edits that relate to the word "Duff" but I am not sure relate to the articles they were made in. Spıke Ѧ 03:28 31-Jul-14

Dittos AustinTrouton‎ just now — His user page here was short, cryptic, and without links; his post on an offsite blog was the work of our usual spambot. Spıke Ѧ 18:40 31-Jul-14

edit Article idea

I see while wandering through recent changes that some idiot thought he would report you to "television and newspapers" if he wasn't unblocked. How about an unnews in the style of the "newspaper" report if the newspaper actually ran it, something like "Admin blocks complete idiot", and giving all the juicy details, including an interview with the bannee (Wah, wah, he blocked me and I showed him real good by reporting it). Obviously, there would have to be something in there about how he created sockpuppets, was stupid instead of funny, violated at least 2 policies that merited a ban, and the like. What do you think? -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 02:41, August 6, 2014 (UTC)

It strikes me as a navelism UnNews, such as the recent UnNews of ScottPat that I just disparaged. (The navelism at the end of my UnNews:Gaza finally scores a direct hit is not true navelism but using the name of UnNews as a proxy for the mass media.) It also strikes me as the venality that gave rise to our Fisher Price saga: an article written not to amuse a general reader but to finish pwn'ing the idiot (as if banning him weren't enough). The guy is so dumb he's going to report us to television? we'll report him to UnNews! Instead, I aim to do Ebola tomorrow. Spıke Ѧ 05:09 6-Aug-14
On second thought, my navelism objection would be countered by making it an article for the UnSignpost, where navelism clears Page One. I still think this episode was a typical reaction to a dope, except for the dope's dopey threat, but if you can weave it into a fun story, give it a try and I'll help. Spıke Ѧ 13:58 8-Aug-14
I'd be happy to have material to put on UnSignpost's page. Sir ScottPat (converse) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 14:10, August 8, 2014 (UTC)

edit Mirror, mirror, on the wall...

Hi. I tried to log in to the mirror site to make some changes and couldn't get signed in. Is the site blocked from changes and, if so, how would I go about doing that. And can photos be deleted on the mirror site, or is it forever and ever. Thanks! Aleister 15:16 8-8-14

The mirror has a lot of technical issues frequently. Sometimes the server is down but a backup allows viewing only of pages (but not editing). Also, I think the user database is different so you may have to re-register there. I don't have ability to delete photos since they are hosted on a different carlb site, you might ask Carlb about that, and maybe in a year he might respond. The site when up, is not blocked from changes, IPs can and do make changes there frequently. When it is down, nobody can make changes, though cached pages can still be viewed. To see changes made when the site is up, put a ? after the url in your browser then reload the page. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 00:18, August 9, 2014 (UTC)

PS If you go to the main page of the mirror then log in, you have to put the ? after the main page url to see that you are logged in.

edit I got your message!

Sorry I don't get notified about Uncyclopedia talks enough I got your message about the mirror wiki! Thank you so much for letting me know you were one of the people in charge.

About that one article me and Spike discussed, yes I personally think it should be gone from the archive sites. It was gone from both wikis and I personally think it should be gone from the mirror. The article in a way glorifies pedophillia and sexual violence (I think that falls onto the 'offensive'category, correct me if I'm wrong) and the pictures...although just illustrated...oh dear, do not get me started on them.

It's not that it's badly written, it's just that it is simply tasteless even for the archives, I have even seen lot of users from both wikis finnd it disgusting and a lot of them wanted it gone, I think the least we can do is get it out of the mirror wiki.

I strongly suggest it should be legitimately gone for good, but this is just my opinion.

Thank you! HoratioMan64 (talk) 17:06, August 8, 2014 (UTC)

If everything that someone found offensive was removed, there would be very little left. However, please refresh my memory as to which article it is, and I will review the article, and if I share your opinion that it appears to glorify pedophilia and sexual violence, I will delete it from the mirror. The idea I had for the mirror site was for it to be an inclusionist version of Uncyclopedia, favoring including more content than deleting it, in the hopes that someone would come along and rewrite bad stuff. Vanity is also tolerated on the mirror site, as long as it is funny and does not cross the line into cyberbullying or posting of personal info. The mirror site will probably never be a serious competitor of either site, since the new content there comes almost exclusively from IPs, and more than half the pages there are of substandard quality, driving off new quality writers, and most readers. Most people from both sites would probably view the mirror as pointless, but as carlb has no plans to close it down, I do what I can to weed out the worst of it, kill spambots, and the like. As to the pictures, I do not have rights there to delete those since those are hosted on a separate carlb site. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 00:10, August 9, 2014 (UTC)
Right, you didn't see it. Well okay, the article of the name is....I don't think I want to say it because I don't want Google to record this conversation but it's called Super Smash Sises Brawl. Please delete my reply afterwards HoratioMan64 (talk) 16:45, August 9, 2014 (UTC)
Hopefully the censorship template should take care of removing it from Google's watchful eye. That article has a decent concept behind it - fighting women in a Nintendo setting instead of men, but its approach is very sexist, and the article's comedy and method are lacking. But sexist humor is still humor, much as women like myself hate to admit it. Check out the article Girls on the mirror site and you can see an even more sexist approach, which is why that article got deleted here (but probably not on the other Uncyc). The mention of "loli" in the article you wanted deleted was on the borderline between glorifying and simply mentioning the existence of pedophilia, so I removed that and changed it to blame feminists instead of lolis for the game. As to the picture, unfortunately I cannot do anything about that since I don't have access to the site where pictures are hosted for the mirror site. Fortunately, since it is a cartoon, it could be interpreted as college age women rather than teen girls. (Their ta-tas are developed so they are not pre-pubescent). However, I can and will remove use of that picture from that article, since the age of the females pictured is ambiguous. Reload the page using ? after the page url in your browser and maybe my changes will show up for you on the mirror site. I also added the list template there, which is what likely killed the article on the other site as well as on this site. Remove the list portion of that article and there is very little left in the way of content, just a sentence or two per header, which is really not enough for a full-fledged article. Lists generally don't belong on the main site, but they are tolerated on the mirror. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 05:30, August 10, 2014 (UTC)

edit UN:LIST

I've edited this policy document, and you are welcome to post-edit as you often do. I put in the Intro the information on what to do about listcruft (adding VFD as the original article suggested QVFD), and added descriptions of various things that have the same flaws as unfunny lists have. Spıke Ѧ 14:49 9-Aug-14

Hmm, you obviously have now proofread it better than I had. Separately, Preteen slut is now on VFD. It is either obsessed with child molestation — several of us think so, including some new users who seem to have no other business here than fighting this — or, says Aleister, it is a subtle parody of obsession with child molestation. I would value your vote on it. Spıke Ѧ 13:00 10-Aug-14

edit Tasteless article

Regarding Forum:Uncyclopedia Events Planner on tasteless articles, there is now Pink slime. Spıke Ѧ 00:02 21-Aug-14

I would consider that article more "untasty" than tasteless. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 00:08, August 21, 2014 (UTC)

edit Dungeon Keeper

Surely you're scrubbing this article as a veteran of the game. But Section 1, which you cleaned up, is still classic listcruft, unrelated items stuck there mostly without explanation. I would have deleted it entirely. Spıke Ѧ 02:09 21-Aug-14

I haven't had the opportunity to play the PC game yet, but I have a version for the ipad. I probably will end up deleting the list, but I thought the names I left i the list might have some significance to veteran gamers. ---- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 03:57, August 21, 2014 (UTC)

edit USP

Thanks for moving the issue that I mentioned on Puppy's talkpage! I've just noticed that you did it. And thank you for voting at Forum:Uncyclopedia Events Planner! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 14:17, August 22, 2014 (UTC)

edit Patrol help

I have once again fallen behind in patrolling, leaving a half-dozen edits that added paragraphs of new text. They don't strike me as funny, but if you like them, please mark them Patrolled. Spıke Ѧ 11:00 24-Aug-14

My internet was down earlier today, but now that I have internet access I got the patrolling caught up. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 05:49, August 25, 2014 (UTC)

edit VFD

Welcome back! There are several crappy articles on VFD that your fifth vote could push into the abyss! Spıke Ѧ 20:58 7-Sep-14

edit Uncyclopedia:Drama

I've rewritten this (all except the examples, about which see my comments to Romartus) and you are welcome to copy-edit it as you often do. Separately, thank you for concurring against starting an interwiki "jihad." Spıke Ѧ 12:16 10-Sep-14

edit User DethCrow17

Thank you for the crisis intervention! (One bird or two?) There is more crisis intervention to perform at VFD. Spıke Ѧ 00:29 16-Sep-14

edit Collaborations

I saw you working on Collaborations on your user page and added ours. If you really hate it, you can delete it. Also don't forget your work on the annual Top 100 lists. Spıke Ѧ 02:30 17-Sep-14

edit Final Fantasy XII

User Kennyloh179 is back in here and on one other page (see Unpatrolled Edits). You have reverted him previously. He deals with gaming articles — here, changing two illustrations — and I'll let you continue dealing with him, especially as he dealt with a revert plus comment from me by appending Category:Assholes to my user page. I admit I gave him the idea by way of (negative) example, but this isn't appropriate for any editing dispute. Spıke Ѧ 02:04 21-Sep-14

His edits to the Final Fantasy XII article do not change the humor significantly. He is probably an enthusiast of one console over the other, but for those who aren't console enthusiasts, the changes make no difference that he made to this article. I will check his user page and talk page to see what else is going on regarding this situation. Sorry for the delayed response, I have been very busy IRL this weekend: my bf had a heart operation, pulled through ok, then asked me to marry him (I said yes). After he is out of the hospital and recovered, we will have some pruning to do as far as stuff in each household goes so that it will fit in one house, though there are no plans to move in before marriage, so we may delay the pruning awhile. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 04:36, September 22, 2014 (UTC)
Wow! Congratulations! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 04:54, September 22, 2014 (UTC)
The ultimate intrusion of the dreaded Real Life! I would have had a heart operation for you, Simsie! Best wishes! Spıke Ѧ 09:10 22-Sep-14

edit Worst 100 Reflections on 2014

You have had no reflections since May. (At least, none concerning Uncyclopedia!) "Avoid the last-minute rush!" Spıke Ѧ 23:21 2-Oct-14

I didn't want to be the *only* contributor to the list. Besides, some of the stuff that could be put on the list, like the Happy Monkey competition between the sites, and the debate about whether to have an IRC chat channel again, I wasn't sure how to make funny. Speaking of the other site, looks like they skipped their Worst 100 Reflections on 2014 entirely. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 02:28, October 3, 2014 (UTC)

edit UnNews:Florida man killed by thug, music

This would make a perfect UnNews topic - especially if the METHOD was loud music rather than a gun. I can see the headline now - 4 teenagers killed by loud music. (Cause of death - head asplosion?) -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 19:56, October 17, 2014 (UTC)

Indeed. Get started. (I am already dominating the features currently on the Front Page.) Spıke Ѧ 20:01 17-Oct-14
Well, here it is. If it is not what you wanted, tough; the media hype white-on-black violence and ignore The Knock-out Game; but I hope this is funny enough. Spıke Ѧ 01:29 18-Oct-14
It still uses a gun as the method, but I think it is fine for an UnNews just as it is - I am not sure what changes I might make to it. ---- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 12:23, October 18, 2014 (UTC)
And you entirely neglected to mention Facebook freezing employees' eggs! so here is another UnNews. Spıke Ѧ 12:29 18-Oct-14

edit Christy Turlington

Thanks for smoothing out Sannse's censorship. I came in afterward and deleted the footnote. The galleries might go too (as we regard them as pictorial lists). This editor reminds me of Beanna in using Uncyclopedia for a soft-porn treatment of a celebrity, except that it's a different celebrity. Spıke Ѧ 03:22 5-Nov-14

I didn't see a lot of point in the gallery section of this article, but I do see a strategy anyway - the idea that a celeb is really a vampire. The MILF stuff in the gallery is dumb. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 03:28, November 5, 2014 (UTC)

edit Here's a very special UnSignpost

Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:49, November 9, 2014 (UTC)

edit Login Problems

Hi there!

I have tried to log in with my Wikia account multiple times now, and it will not allow me to. I tried to sign up with my username (JustAnIng) and it would not let me. This is a sub-domain of Wikia, so it should work, but it did not. I need to know if this is a bug or what, and in needs to be fixed. Thanks for any help. You can also see my Wikia account here.

-- 00:55, December 30, 2014 (UTC)

I've replied at User talk:SPIKE. Spıke Ѧ 01:07 30-Dec-14

edit Motivational posters

Welcome back! But adding "Motivational posters" as a requested article? Is there any doubt that this would be fleshed out as an awful "page in the style of the thing it's about" — namely, a catalog of Best Of The Web?

Do you have the time to join the competition? It has served as a good excuse to crank out some new articles. Spıke Ѧ 19:43 2-Jan-15

I suppose I might be able to write oe about the aoyace of ot havig a workig "" key. Or about the difficulties of composig a article o a ipad. But the agai I am about to go ito busy seaso sice I work i taxes so I might ot have time with 12 hour shifts. Feel free to edit this to add the missig letter if it makes it easier for you to read.-- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 05:33, January 6, 2015 (UTC)

edit Sitenotice

And what, exactly, is cool about navy-and-chartreuse uniforms??? Spıke Ѧ 20:46 15-Jan-15

They don't clash as much as red and navy, with or without silver. Besides, blue and green are complementary colors. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 05:31, January 16, 2015 (UTC)

That is not green, that is chartreuse. It has no complementary color at all. Let the Battle of the Admins continue! Spıke Ѧ 15:56 16-Jan-15

Try telling that to the fans around here. There are blue & green cupcakes, blue & green pompoms, blue & green socks(like the ones I was given for Christmas), blue & green houselights, blue & green lights on the stadium, green & blue bows on little dogs, you get the picture. Besides, chartreuse is a light shade of green, and combined with blue it looks good in neon colors on the giant ferris wheel in downtown Seattle. I'm not much of a sports nut, but I occasionally like to watch in amusement, or if they make it to the Superbowl. Unless of course, I'm stuck working and the customers are watching a program in Spanish. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 05:18, January 17, 2015 (UTC)

Re: Christmas socks: Selfie or it didn't happen. Re: Spanish: Since when did "Dreamers" pay taxes? Spıke Ѧ 11:39 17-Jan-15

Selfie pending for sometime when I have more time, to be sent via email. Today I also noticed the checkstands at the grocery store lit up in light green, with navy and light green streamers hung between them. Too bad I didn't have a camera with me. "Dreamers" pay taxes more often than you'd think. If they are working under a SSN (theirs or not theirs) and having taxes withheld from their pay, then they are paying taxes, and may or may not be entitled to a refund since people with ITINS can still claim the child tax credit and education credits (but not the earned income credit). They even pay into social security, but if they don't have a SSN of their own they will never get any benefits from that. Besides, ITINs are in high demand. They are supposed to only be used for federal tax purposes, but some other places accept them too. If you want more details on ITINs, that info can be found on the IRS website, along with other information on tax treatment of "resident aliens". -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 05:51, January 20, 2015 (UTC)

Both ends of my post — that I need proof that you have chartreuse socks, and that Dreamers contribute nothing — are rhetorical. In fact, most economic activity is useful, and we all pay all taxes, as Obama should know despite his current plan to further raise taxes for the sake of reward and punishment of specific classes. The corporate tax should go away, as no one knows how much is translated to lower bonuses for executives, lower dividends and interest, higher prices, and lower shop wages; we only know that corporations don't suffer, they only cut the check. On illegals, the relevant question is not whether they contribute any money to Washington but whether it is worth the cost and better than the alternative; also whether winking about immigration law emboldens them to break other laws.

Not a problem, either, that you didn't see your team's comeback win over Green Bay, as I did. Two years from now, you will remember where you were on Sunday, and I won't remember any details of this game. Bottom line: A Packer who was sent out to block a Seahawk saw a free ball, instinctively lunged for it, and had it bounce off his face mask and back to the Seahawks, and that became the game. Spıke Ѧ 14:37 20-Jan-15

PS--UnNews:New England steals AFC trophy Spıke Ѧ 17:31 20-Jan-15

Thanks for filling in the missing details about the overtime game. I see we have a difference of opinion regarding the corporate tax. While the corporate tax has the potential to overtax small corporations, and provide excuses to larger corporations (to do what they would've done anyways) the alternative is to either cut budgets (government furloughs, longer wait times on hold for government offices, shorter government office hours, obsolete computers posing security risks, closed national parks, cuts to veterans benefits, cuts to social security, cuts to national defense) or raise taxes elsewhere, like on the rich or middle class households. If we raise taxes on the rich households, they probably would not stand for an income tax of more than 50 percent. So they would not likely be able to make up the difference. So that leaves the middle class, which might be defined as those households making between 25k and 75k per year. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 07:26, January 21, 2015 (UTC)
PS - UnNews:Earth attacked by godzilla again - Ugh. Do you want to rewrite this, or shall we just delete it? I'm leaning towards delete myself. Although the headline has potential if properly capitalized (it's Godzilla not godzilla), the content is beyond awful. Perhaps instead it could be written from the perspective of a building instead of the perspective of someone who thinks King Kong is superior to Godzilla. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 08:43, January 21, 2015 (UTC)

Sorry, I saw to that before I got to your post. Doesn't look like news, isn't based on news, ends with "byyyyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee", author is not a registered Uncyclopedian.

How about the two stubby articles about nothing, that reference one another, from Thebricke?

Xamralco deleted one of them last night and I just saw to the other. Spıke Ѧ 22:45 21-Jan-15

The play I described above did not happen in overtime but was the most dramatic of several things that sent a Packers rout into overtime. Conventional wisdom (which I doubt) is that the Packers "took their foot off the Seahawks' throat."

On the corporate tax, it is worse than corporations getting breaks to do what they would anyway. They get favors, they get a two-order-of-magnitude return on their campaign contribution, and the politician gets to take credit for all that economic activity (that would have happened anyway).

But the Democrat excuse on any tax cut is "How are you going to pay for it? Not by treating existing government workers miserly, but by reducing government's mandate. I would start (not the worst but most newsworthy) with the Department of Energy. It has not in its 38 years solved the "energy crisis" — mostly by trying to force us to curtail our lives — until achievers did it themselves with innovation, with the DoE kicking and screaming. Everything at Commerce can be privatized, everything Education does is better done locally and is done locally, and everything Labor does is harmful.

Some tax cuts pay for themselves, as the new Congress thankfully installed people at the CBO who are willing to try to measure. All the taxes Obama proposed raising last night are already beyond diminishing returns, suggesting that they will never do what he promised. (He admitted this during one of his campaigns but said it is a matter of "fairness.") PS--I am not a member of any "class," the US has no hard barriers to class mobility, nearly every American is both "rich" and "poor" at some point in our lives, and nobody's success ever made me fail. Spıke Ѧ 12:41 21-Jan-15

There may not be any "hard barriers" but there are certainly barriers, such as the rising cost (and diminishing returns) of college education, required prestige/luxury items to succeed in certain fields to impress the clientele/seal the deals, the cost of purchasing and maintaining a work wardrobe for white collar jobs, and so on. And if nobody's success ever made you fail then you certainly have never had your job outsourced overseas. This practice of outsourcing has the effect of making import/export businesses more successful and executives more successful as a result of getting a nice fat bonus for what they saved the company in labor costs by laying off US workers and hiring foreigners overseas for half the cost or less. And worse yet, if enough companies do that, and the minimum wage stays the same for years, soon we will become a nation of salespeople and service people, and nobody except upper management making enough money to buy much of anything except the bare basics to survive.
And as far as which taxes actually get increased or cut, those are a function of which lobbying group is loudest. If the loudest lobbying groups want more government services, taxes increase. If the loudest lobbying groups want reduced taxes, they tend to get decreased. Same as to where the tax money actually goes once it is collected. And some of what taxes are collected on the national level are distributed to the state and local level for state and local projects. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 10:41, January 23, 2015 (UTC)

Where to begin.

  1. The decreasing value of college (in this era, when everything is available on the Internet except the personal guidance to put it all together — and I provide a little of that here, nightly) owes mostly to massive government subsidies, and to every President since G.H.W. Bush declaring that everyone should have a degree from a bricks-and-mortar institution, no matter whether it makes the degree meaningless.
  2. The cost of doing business (good clothing, desire to out-compete one's competitors) is not a problem for government to solve; nor the possibility that someone else will do my job better (offshore or not) and I will have to find a different one. (And if you think foreign competition is a problem, one obvious answer is to get serious about border control — though I welcome workers and would only turn away the beggars.) "Nobody's success ever made me fail" does not mean "Nothing bad ever happens."
  3. Affordability is not a problem for government to solve; we all live within our budgets (and government does not). There are always shortages and costs. The minimum wage does not give anyone a raise; it merely declares an increasing set of jobs illegal to offer.
  4. We are a nation of salespeople and service people. We used to be 90% farmers, then we were manufacturers. There is no way the peacocks in Congress know who we will be in ten years — if they let us remain free.
  5. "Fat" executive bonuses, apart from revealing resentment that should not be the basis for US policy, are also a process of competition for good managers. The flip side after failure is a discreet but insistent hint to resign, not file unemployment, and not sue to keep one's pension if one wants to keep one's reputation.
  6. And yes, tax policy and other policy is based on lobbying (that is, "petition[ing] the government for redress of grievances"), and corporations can even make a movie ridiculing Hillary Clinton, no thanks to Obama's carping at the Justices during two State of the Unions. If you believe that corporations find it easier convincing Congress than they would find convincing us, that argues for taking more economic decisions out of its hands and leaving them in our hands.

Now, do you disagree that the new taxes Obama proposed would reduce the revenues of the federal government?

Back to Uncyclopedia, the football UnNews has become a diary of updates. Spıke Ѧ 15:21 23-Jan-15

Speaking of football, it looks like I'll be stuck at the office that Sunday again this year. End of the month reports for eight stores are due by the 5th, and I cannot start them until the first. So if I'm lucky I'll get to listen to the game from the back of a busy office, unless the Spanish channel is on again, or perhaps a soccer game.
As to the taxes Obama proposed - I just read the text of the State of the Union speech, and no specific taxes were proposed yet, just generalities implied. If the government taxes investments, it will not just hurt the rich, but also the retired senior citizens who depend upon their retirement investments, and will tend to discourage new investments in general. If people spend instead of invest, the economy will be boosted in the short term, but at the expense of the long term. And there was talk of "closing loopholes", but no specifics were given. If lobbyists put those loopholes in place, lobbyists will prevent them from being removed, regardless of who the extra tax money might help. Finally raising the minimum wage does indeed give raises to workers who work at the minimum wage, provided they remain employed after the minimum wage is raised (with the exception of states and localities who have already raised the local minimum wage above the federal minimum wage). It does not make jobs done by independent contractors illegal, provided that they are billed by the job rather than by the number of hours spent on it. (Example: A plasma donor might get $25 per donation, which takes 4-6 hours.) It does, however, tend to have a cause and effect type increase on the price of goods and services produced by higher paid workers. Whether it is worth more to reward a company that pays its workers a living wage, is a decision for consumers to make. As it stands now, in most areas it is not possible to support a family of 4 with one wage earner working full time on the minimum wage, and unlikely to support a family with childcare needs with two wage earners working full time on the minimum wage. Fast food & small business retailers typically do pay minimum wage, and actively discourage overtime pay. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 07:47, January 24, 2015 (UTC)

We are approaching agreement on the effects of higher taxes. Obama did not give the specifics in his speech, but the White House put out the details.

  • One notorious detail was a change in the rules for accounts where people were promised they could put money (after paying taxes on it) and let it grow tax-free to apply to education — quite a deal. Who knew there would be a tax on the other end?! Promises made by past Presidents? Who knew there were any other Presidents?
  • Glad you noted that taxes on investment don't just affect the rich guy who sees the tax, but not-so-enviable investors. They also affect everyone down the line, such as poor people who can't choose jobs that were never created.
  • "Provided they remain employed" is the key Big If to the minimum wage (and I don't care which level of government mandates it) and to Obama-care (which is a huge increase in the minimum wage for any business that does not drop its health plan). Searching for alternatives to using low-skill workers located within the USA is the way out of the minimum wage, and is the defining feature of the Obama economy. You simply cannot mandate that money go where it would not otherwise go and hope for no matching unintended side-effects.
  • No, it is not possible for one minimum-wage worker to support a family of 4. Nor a family of 16, nor have a summer home. Why should it be? Chinese fast-food workers sleep in bunks, day-laborers work night jobs and may fit in a college course, people get married, to save some money and live a better life in the future, while you state arbitrary goals for how good their present life should be, which will lead to policy that will take from them some of the ways they could advance. The minimum wage depends on a static view in which the poor stay poor forever unless "we" intervene. In fact, the minimum wage is the clearest example of class-based policy actually making class barriers more rigid by preventing upward mobility.

Investment is the corn you grow and, instead of eating it, you put it in the silo to plant it next spring and make more corn. Inducing people to "spend instead of invest" does not simply trade off a short-term boost for long-term pain; it extinguishes wealth. Obama's ARRA "stimulus" and Bush's "tax rebates" had no measurable effect — wheel-spinning is not forward movement, no matter what the speedometer reads — because, all other things being equal, financial rates and prices change to reflect the need to pay it back in the future. That everyone has to eat does not mean that we should eat the seed corn, and we are never better off doing so. As money multiplies exponentially, for every tax on investment, there is a year at which it will have extinguished more wealth than it raises for government. Spıke Ѧ 13:22 24-Jan-15

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