User talk:Simsilikesims/Archive 5

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User Llwy-ar-lawr, still trying to achieve her third resignation in the loudest way possible, has again blanked her talk page--evidently to reinsert her desired contact address at the top--and accordingly, I have restored it, inserted her desired contact information, and banned her again.

She has also nailed 96 theses to the door of Uncyclopedia in the form of her user page, noting that she doesn't want to get banned again for the 4th time, though there were only 2, and the first one was the two-week ban she explicitly asked me for so that she could concentrate on studies. As she is assembling everything I do into a deceptive and dishonest tale of abuse at the hands of Wikia, I will leave her in your hands. My inclination would be to delete her user page as disruptive and uninformative. Spıke Ѧ 04:18 30-Jul-13

Her user page shows her opinion of things, nothing more, nothing less. That is her viewpoint, so I don't see any reason to delete it. The "dishonesty" is self-delusion on her part. Only those who are interested in her as a user will visit that page, so it is not really disruptive as it would have been if she had started a forum to disparage Wikia. Perhaps she did indeed see other users' signatures that link to external sites, and I would be interested to find out which ones since the rules should be applied evenly. I interpreted what she said to mean that she is feeling claustrophobic with Wikia's TOS, and she is leaving. Disappointing, but that is her right, and perhaps this time she will leave this site for good since she does not seem to be able to work within the constraints here. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 04:49, July 30, 2013 (UTC)
I would let Llwy-ar-lawr's user page message stand, in line with previous policy regards users who want to shut the door with as much noise as possible. Similar examples (though on different issues) can be see on User talk:Famine and User talk:Nerd42's pages. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 06:36, July 30, 2013 (UTC)

Archiving VFD

Thanks for the help on archiving VFD. But please leave a bit of time for users to see the results before you archive them, especially at The Reformation, where I have a note to Romartus that he would be the ideal candidate to restart this article. Spıke Ѧ 15:10 4-Aug-13

I saw your comment there, and I plan on leaving the VFD results up for a bit, but thanks for the tip. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 15:16, August 4, 2013 (UTC)

Huffing tip

When deleting cyberbullying, if you also delete the standard message (the start of the file) that gets placed in the Huff Log, the bully will get even less bang for his buck. Cheers! Spıke Ѧ 11:55 10-Aug-13

Sorry for the USP

I am sorry but the new format of the UnSignpost makes the content box and the edit buttons of the talk page disappear. Therefore, I am removing it for a while and will bring it back when these issues are fixed. But you can still read this issue at UnSignpost/20130810. Thank you for your patience! Anton (talk) 11:56, August 13, 2013 (UTC)

Headings on QVFD

A belated happy birthday to you!

Separately, do you empty the cat box on each August 14? That is like me and laundry.

Now, keeping alive the prank template {{Admin}} solely to commemorate the role of pranksterism in our history? Very well.... Spıke Ѧ 12:54 14-Aug-13

Thank you for the belated birthday wishes! Don't worry, I empty my cat box about twice a week, or when I get back from a mini vacation as I did this time. Played some board games at my parents house for my birthday, then went up into the wilderness to Mount Rainier by car with my aunt and uncle (they were in town from New Jersey) the day after. The views up there are gorgeous, and we put some miles on their rental car. My car has been having a starter problem so I finally got it fixed Tues evening. However, my car is old, so a lifespan of 18 years for a starter isn't bad. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 21:06, August 14, 2013 (UTC)

My starter had not been having problems, but had one fatal one last month after 9 years of service. The mechanic found evidence of gnawing at the wire, presumably by the same critter that got all the way through the nearby garden hose. Spıke Ѧ 22:13 14-Aug-13

Hai Simsie!

Plz vote yes on Forum:A New Forest Fire Week. thx --The Sieger of Dungeons Lord Denza Aetherwing Inventory 09:13, August 15, 2013 (UTC)


In this new article, I read the Wikipedia article and found one passage that I reveled in sporking and knifing for Uncyclopedia. But creator Theluseichronicler has reverted this, in favor of more of his coded complaint against "Ass people" (from Assam state, I assume), although he seems to have taken my suggestion on his talk page, and lightened up on the Chink humor. Would you care to evaluate or arbitrate? Spıke Ѧ 00:19 18-Aug-13

Afterward, Newman66 took over the above article, and told its creator at User talk:Theluseichronicler that this was necessary in view of the bad writing; and I whacked Newman for 1 day for incivility. My explanation to him is now archived. It adds to my impression through reverts/QVFDs/VFDs that a motivation of Newman, surpassing humor, is achieving pwnage over other new editors. Spıke Ѧ 12:58 27-Aug-13

I would agree that he needs to learn that creation and construction of new articles is just as important as deleting cruft. I'd leave him a message, but don't know what it would say. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 18:16, August 27, 2013 (UTC)

Problems, considering the UnSignpost

If you care about what we deliver to you, please, take a look at this forum and vote if you can! Your opinion is very important! Anton (talk) 17:21, August 19, 2013 (UTC)

Reverting me?

You are absolutely right; I had read and reverted that comment too quickly (my eyes somehow drawn to the end of it). Thanks for undoing my revert. Spıke Ѧ 16:42 20-Aug-13

You're welcome. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 17:20, August 20, 2013 (UTC)

Game:Jail break

Three subpages are still showing up in mainspace rather than as subpages; see RecentChanges and deselect patrolled pages. There is always Special:Nuke/ if you prefer, though it might not work on the pages you named; I'd nuke it, as I don't see this project going anywhere, especially toward humor.

I left some of the older pages unpatrolled as a reminder to tag or deal with them, notably the good but unencyclopedic writing by Kody-the-Fox, who has not replied to my query in over 3 days. Spıke Ѧ 14:06 21-Aug-13

Since this game was created by an unregistered IP who seems to have given up after my 10 minute block of him, I think I will just nuke it, since the game seems destined to remain unfinished. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 14:21, August 21, 2013 (UTC)

DED NOT BIG SURPISE Spıke Ѧ 15:25 21-Aug-13

Achievement Hunter

Just to clarify: No cyberbullying here, I'm writing an article about a youtube channel with over 6 million subscribers and over 2 billion views. Hopefully that would qualify as famous. AH Matt (talk) 07:00, August 25, 2013 (UTC)

It might indeed qualify as famous, or it might be considered an internet meme. Remember to write the article in an encyclopedic tone if possible, since we are a parody encyclopedia, not a catalog of memes. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 07:18, August 25, 2013 (UTC)
Another thing to remember: Write original humor, rather than documenting humor that is being devised on another website (that is, a YouTube channel). Write to amuse, not to report--even by randomizing facts or using a jaunty tone of voice. I suspect that that is not what you are here to do. In particular, we do not care about a list of each of the self-styled celebrities on that channel. Spıke Ѧ 12:17 25-Aug-13
PS--My suspicion seems to have been correct, as author replaced the page with a request for it to be deleted, and I did so. Spıke Ѧ 20:37 26-Aug-13

Worst 100 Songs To Play At A Funeral‎‎

Anon is having a field day appending song titles to this list. The section after the formal listing is open season for Anons to type the name of any song having something to do with life or death (or not; I don't see the link to Happy Birthday by Stevie Wonder) without even having to think about the rankings. The first over-optimistic song in the list is funny, but appending all over-optimistic songs one can think of is just the usual problem of telling the same joke over again. Perhaps you better than I could sort out the wheat from the chaff, and even write a clever paragraph about some of the survivors, as the original authors started out doing. Spıke Ѧ 20:36 26-Aug-13

It is back!

Anton (talk) 12:29, August 28, 2013 (UTC)

UnSignpost - Delivered every [other] week!

Anton (talk) 10:43, August 29, 2013 (UTC)


Thank you for paring back the listcruft by Kwame here. What especially annoys me is adding the names of cities about which he has nothing at all to say. These edits (continuing at Michigan) occurred after I advised him to the contrary on his talk page, and I have banned him for 1 day. Spıke Ѧ 22:07 3-Sep-13

I saw your note to him, and the red flag was adding more than 40000 characters to the Chicago article, most of it about the suburbs, which are already covered in another article. Speaking of listcruft, you might want to review my edits to Worst 100 Songs To Play At A Funeral, I was in a very strange mood that day. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 22:20, September 3, 2013 (UTC)
Ah, it was I who gave you this Heroic Quest. (If we really have a problem with the tendency of lists to "tell the same joke over and over again," why are ours styled as the Top 100? Why not the Top 10 as in Letterman?) The result is not what I had in mind; I anticipated subtraction rather than addition, and prose rather than following the page's formula of parenthetical, one-line wisecracks about when not to play a given song. I wonder if the various groups of 10 could be organized in terms of separate reasons that make certain songs inappropriate, each with an introductory paragraph that is funny-in-depth, under which ten songs would merely be examples to drive home the joke. (Or beat it to death.) I'll take the first stab at this.
Still included in the list are songs where I don't see the humor at all. For example, a Green Day rage song wishing someone were dead would of course be inappropriate at a funeral; but there's nothing at all clever about this; playing the song would just be garden-variety dickery. Spıke Ѧ 22:58 3-Sep-13
Some of those could probably be replaced by some of the songs listed at the bottom of the page that don't have information listed next to them, many of them more party songs than funeral songs. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 23:16, September 3, 2013 (UTC)
My first cut is in--It at least shows where I am going with this. Yes, the unnumbered list at the end is too long, mostly unexplained, and generally inexplicable. By the way, the need to give each entry a number is problematic too--editors fight over the good real estate and every so often, a compulsive one starts to care about correct ranking and we can never figure out what he really did. Spıke Ѧ 23:20 3-Sep-13
Thanks, I just couldn't think how to phrase the paragraphs. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 23:52, September 3, 2013 (UTC)
My last cut is now in. My question for you, dear Pop Picker: Is there anything beneath the Construction tag whose inclusion makes the article much funnier? 00:21 Ah, but I see you are pulling songs up judiciously. Carry on! 00:25 If, after pulling up everything you feel is worth salvaging, you delete {{Construction}} and everything below, we will have a finished article. Pleasure doing business with you! Spıke Ѧ 00:50 4-Sep-13


Welcome in! I see you encountered Wolvy last night but he didn't do much. We had another new user, DalekBot, on a vandal spree about an hour ago; I was writing an UnNews and slow to catch him. Nevertheless, the "throttling" seems to be reducing the payback of mass attacks. Spıke Ѧ 19:55 4-Sep-13

I just love the "Rollback All" script. :) -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 22:24, September 4, 2013 (UTC)

Yup, it worked for me, even on this laptop from 2003. But it has not been a good day for T-Mobile (and two days before time for me to re-up with them for another 60 days)! Nursing bytes through White Fang there on the windowsill was more annoying than dealing with the vandals.

Separately, Chaoarren is banned, but apparent twin Tamerial horror made an edit that suggested it was at the request of Chaoarren, then created another junk page with references to being blocked, then when Anton199 engaged him, responded in characteristic nine-year-old fashion. I whacked him for two weeks. If you see anything in either of these users that suggests that you might be the Horse Whisperer who can get through to them, I don't mind if you bring them back. Spıke Ѧ 22:43 4-Sep-13

The DalekBot looked quite dangerous. It appeared to be on its own FF Mission. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 07:16, September 5, 2013 (UTC)

Mission seemed to be to nominate all recently edited pages for VFD. I detect a butt-hurt editor whose creation got nominated, though no fan of Daleks comes to mind. Spıke Ѧ 13:24 5-Sep-13

No I'm not. I'm just a person who enjoys running rampant on Uncyclopedia with a vandalbot. DalekBot and Mwhahaloser are the same person. 19:24, September 5, 2013 (UTC)

Spike, if you want a cheap, but good laptop upgrade, sucka.--The Sieger of Dungeons Lord Denza Aetherwing Inventory 23:08, September 5, 2013 (UTC)(my fork sig has swastikas!)

Im thinking of a number between 7 and 9

I bet you don't know what it is. I bet you a hundred currency units. I bet you your fake hand and your shoelaces from your days in the army. I bet you your non-temporal soul and your engraved Canadian sized bowling balls! I bet your can't count. You're also illiterate...I bet. Still don't know the number? It's higher than seven and lower than nine. It's how many sides a stop sign has and it's the amount of times you've stunk up an elevator without taking the credit. Anyhoo...I'll wait. You'll get it one day...and I'm patient. --ShabiDOO 12:33, September 5, 2013 (UTC)

Ok, I guess 8. Now where's my hundred currency units? -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 16:23, September 5, 2013 (UTC)
Isn't it 2.828 squared? Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 17:49, September 5, 2013 (UTC)
WRONG! TRY AGAIN! --ShabiDOO 02:17, September 11, 2013 (UTC)

The Cure

Thank you for concurring with me on this; I have taken the deletions a bit further, with an explanation at User talk:Geoffsebesta.

I do not know where to begin regarding user BetterSkatez2012, though second-grade grammar would have been a good start, if he were paying attention. We now have Kidz bop in addition to the existing Kidz Bop, Written in The Author's Signature style & it Don't read rite. Uglyness. Spıke Ѧ 20:23 7-Sep-13

Both these pages appear as red links to me, but I will keep an eye on this user. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 21:03, September 7, 2013 (UTC)
PS - It appears there is now only one Kidz Bop page. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 21:08, September 7, 2013 (UTC)

My fault for not typing with a "z". (Also not Previewing.) Spıke Ѧ 21:09 7-Sep-13

What, you mean you're actually human? :) -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 21:20, September 7, 2013 (UTC)

So what?

On this, you are entering a minor stylistic tug of war between Anon, Seafall, and me--check the History and User talk:Seafall. Spıke Ѧ 21:33 7-Sep-13

I know you tend to dislike pages that don't follow the encyclopedic format, but there have also been some features that did have the "comic book" format, consisting of mainly pictures with some good captions. I deleted the reference to Jews under the first caption, since this seemed unnecessarily offensive. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 21:37, September 7, 2013 (UTC)

Yes, that's why, here and in the section below, it seemed better not to enforce anything unless it also failed your more broad-minded review. Spıke Ѧ 16:33 11-Sep-13


Would you care to take a look at new user Adamsmithjohngalt‎, from the Philippines, I take it? An awful lot of uploads and virtually no humor that I can detect. Spıke Ѧ 01:22 11-Sep-13

Agreed. In some cases, seems like he has mistaken this site for his own Wikipedia. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 01:29, September 11, 2013 (UTC)

Thanks for the investigation. I told him so on his talk page, after earlier giving him the benefit of the doubt. Spıke Ѧ 01:35 11-Sep-13

PS--He seems to have understood you, on illustrations, but not to have understood me, on making contributions funny. Spıke Ѧ 12:28 11-Sep-13

moved here from Ban Patrol


Simsilikesims, I know this isn't the fork, but you're active here right now. Could you please ask an #uncyclopedia op to unban me? Please? I want to say sorry for yesterday. --The Sieger of Dungeons Lord Denza Aetherwing Inventory 22:12, September 11, 2013 (UTC)

I saw ZB try to unban you several times yesterday, but that didn't work. Maybe you got on the bad side of freenode staff somehow. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 22:45, September 11, 2013 (UTC)
How do you get on the bad side of the freenode staff? Anton (talk) 11:55, September 13, 2013 (UTC)
I have no idea. Either way, I don't have ops at #uncyclopedia, and if one of the ops AKICK'ed him, he needs to take it up with them. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 11:56, September 13, 2013 (UTC)

Guess what?

this is not vanity or spam, please do not revert this.->of Chicken butt. --The Sieger of Dungeons Lord Denza Aetherwing Inventory 05:57, September 13, 2013 (UTC)

Sounds tasty. Does it come with eggs? -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 15:47, September 14, 2013 (UTC)


On VFD, you claim to explain what the joke is, but I'm still not getting it; nor do I waver in my belief that "DSA510's claim above that the article is a 'page in the style of the thing it's about' is no defense, given that the thing it's about is mindless and stupid, and the page itself is unreadable, painful to look at, and assembled with no cleverness." What is the joke? Is the humor original Uncyclopedia comedy, or does it all come from Rozen Maiden? Spıke Ѧ 14:12 14-Sep-13

Some of it is original Uncyclopedia comedy, and some of it is pure internet meme. The original part is in illustrating just how stupid the meme is, or was, along with the joking assertion that the article "needs more DESU". It was common practice on 4chan for awhile for someone to type DESU DESU DESU DESU ad nauseum in response to a post just to annoy the original poster. (If you allow a troll to annoy you, the troll wins.) Some of the images probably did come from the 4chan image boards, as a response to this kind of trolling. In Rozen Maiden, the character would always say DESU (once) after everything, and "Needs more DESU" became an internet meme (often typed in response to this kind of trolling). I'm surprised Wikipedia doesn't have an article on this specific internet meme, except to mention in one sentence that it is an internet meme. You can read more about the meme on or even on encyclopedia dramatica (their site is down right now) to compare their take on the meme. In general, I do think a reader of this site that actually typed DESU into the search bar would be looking for funny info on the internet meme. It tends to be difficult to write up internet memes in a parody encyclopedic style, but for the encyclopedic information, check out know your meme if you want to take a shot at it. Right now, I think having an article on DESU is better than not having one, and I think there is enough originality in this one for it to stay, since it sort of illustrates the story behind the meme in a parodic way. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 15:32, September 14, 2013 (UTC)

Very well. Thanks for the details. No, I don't think I could do it any better. Spıke Ѧ 15:56 14-Sep-13

UnSygnposte Delieverie

Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 09:17, September 15, 2013 (UTC)

Restore deleted pages

New user Shultz6 has demanded the return of the article on Sydney. I found a similar version of the code on the Mirror (why do its links not point back to us?) and put it in his userspace. But this was not before I tried to recover the text from Uncyclopedia. The Delete tab gives me a record of past deletions--there were many abortive attempts to re-create the article which are not the one Shultz6 was looking for--but when I picked an older article with 600 edits and clicked view/restore, I saw a log of the edits to the newest deleted version whose character count was way too small to be the desired version. Is this another bug to report to Wikia? Spıke Ѧ 20:45 12-Sep-13

It sounds like it. Many of the articles on the mirror got there via Special:Import pages which means that we should have an identical version in the history somewhere. Carlb imported articles around 2010, plus some before that, and I imported some articles in 2011 and 2012. If the changes to the Sydney article on the mirror were made in 2013 however, I really haven't been monitoring the mirror much in 2013 since I became an admin here. I would report this issue as a bug. As to why the site notice doesn't point back to this site on the mirror - that is because Carlb, owner of the mirror site, has something against Wikia, and changed the site notice after PuppyontheRadio had put a link to this site as well as the other site. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 21:24, September 12, 2013 (UTC)

I was more trying to ask whether you had observed the bug too. Separately, could you describe to me how one reports a bug to Wikia? Spıke Ѧ 14:59 15-Sep-13

I would need more examples to see this bug for myself. To report a bug to Wikia, go to Special:Contact/bug and enter information about the bug in the form. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 15:22, September 15, 2013 (UTC)


You seem to have conceded that, no matter what outrageous things Denza does like using his talk page to talk to himself, it ought not serve to let him make himself the Uncyclopedia meme of the year. But your edit was followed by several Denza edits on Worst 100 Reflections on 2013 with exactly that purpose.

This morning I posted on his talk page that his useful work has given way to singleminded egotism. He replied with a technical defense of one edit, went back to Reflections and added the item: "Denza tries to inject himself into the list....Is promptly reverted by a certain admin every time." On the heels of my message to him, I banned him for a week. He immediately created user ANuStart, went straight back to Reflections, and reinserted his change, plus a TinyURL whose function I do not know nor care. I have permabanned him.

His effort to reform a couple months ago has stalled--In my opinion, it ended the day he asked me on my talk page for "an honest assessment" and I actually gave him one, which disclosed that his Good Behavior Offensive had not succeeded permanently--and nothing he has done since has justified the time we spend babysitting him. Don't bring him back. Spıke Ѧ 23:18 16-Sep-13

ANuStart does indeed appear to be a sock of Supergeeky1, rather than of Denza, given the material in the tiny url, which I looked up to my regret. Supergeeky1 has been incessantly posting that url (a shock picture) on IRC. I do not think Denza would behave the way ANuStart did, since he knows that external links are forbidden, let alone links to shock pictures. Also, the suggestion that Denza put himself on the top 100 (when I was the one who did so) shows that ANuStart didn't know that Denza didn't put himself there. I am going to reduce Denza's ban back to one week, since I do not think he was the one sockpuppeting. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 23:48, September 16, 2013 (UTC)

It is so hard to tell Denza apart from his gang trying to get him in trouble by acting like him! Very well; but then does ANuStart/Supergeeky1 merit a ban for that? Spıke Ѧ 00:18 17-Sep-13

I would say yes. In fact, I think I will extend a certain ban. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 00:19, September 17, 2013 (UTC)
On second thought, SG1 swears it wasn't him, and that he wasn't the first to post the image in IRC. I will wait for the checkuser results before extending the ban. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 00:29, September 17, 2013 (UTC)

It's in your hands; though my approach would have been "permabanned pending review." (As Sarah Palin said, ban them all and let Allah sort them out.) Spıke Ѧ 00:34 17-Sep-13

Denza does not like shock images, he is quite obsessed with sexually related topics and images while on the fork, and is quite obsessed with CAP LOCKS while here, and yes he often tries to get some attention, but he is probably not the Anustart. P.S. Here Simsie suggests that this was a sockpuppet of Supergeeky1, and when Denza suggested that Supergeeky was the one who stole his account, his comment was reverted. Now, that seems to be the truth. Anton (talk) 08:27, September 17, 2013 (UTC)


This user has been asking admins via another wiki if they can reduce or remove the current ban. Given you are the one who have the current ban I thought I'd bring it to your attention. (I have trouble viewing ban logs at the moment due to Wikia screwing up mobile access, so forgive me if I'm highlighting what has already been done.)                               Puppy's talk page08:40 21 Sep 2013

I reduced his ban from 1 week down to 3 days earlier today, as per the discussion on his talk page, whereas he was warned he would get 3 days. I already discussed this with Spike via email. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 20:43, September 21, 2013 (UTC)

New users

"Matt the bare man"--whom you welcomed--came in this morning with "Theuglygoat" and "Ladstandard". The first two edited the same article and the third referenced it. I don't know if they are one user or three, but recess ended and they left the playground when I welcomed "Theuglygoat". Only one related edit arrived, and it was from Anon.

"MyrtonosXXXX" with his first edit said he was trying to set off an abuse filter. I felt he was an old friend returned, and whacked him with a two-week ban.

The article you previewed last night is at User:SPIKE/Wikia site visit and ScottPat seems enthused at leading with it in the next UnSignpost (see the bottom of my talk page). I asked him to give you one more day for any desired refinements. Romartus has already decided that my witty final remark was either not witty enough or not final enough, or felt left out that I saved my best heckling for you. Spıke Ѧ 16:53 23-Sep-13

I got this latest one with the JavaScript button. Another one who spent much more time making his edits than I spent wiping them away. First three edits were to my talk page, providing more forensic information that is either true or it isn't. Spıke Ѧ 21:39 23-Sep-13

Good. I noticed you got to the vandal who messed with my sig before I did. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 21:57, September 23, 2013 (UTC)

That's why I wrote you. But you got to the sig first! Spıke Ѧ 22:01 23-Sep-13

User:There Is No Joseph Evers

I saw that come in and declined to take action, as it seemed to fit under the policy of allowing users to list contact information. Did not follow the link and do not object to what you did. Spıke Ѧ 23:06 23-Sep-13

PS--Can you read my note at User talk:S1312? Are you equipped to help him reduce his mega-narration to something that will upload to the site? Spıke Ѧ 23:12 23-Sep-13

Just read it, and it looks like the problem has since been resolved. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 03:03, September 24, 2013 (UTC)

Sonic Hedgehog contributions

Sudden user Hypershadow1632 submitted two large articles on the 19th in one gulp apiece. Do you know where they came from? Do you know if they are any good? Spıke Ѧ 23:13 24-Sep-13

Mephiles the Hedgehog of Darkness appears to be very similar to the article Mephiles the Dark on mirror uncyc. However, I do not know where the List of Sonic characters may have come from. My only experience with the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise was an old platformer game in the 90s, so I am not familiar enough with these characters to tell whether it is good or not. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 00:39, September 25, 2013 (UTC)

We had an article Mephiles the Dark that is also very similar and we voted it deleted in 2011. I have toasted it, and am inclined to give Hypershadow two for the price of one. Also, our problem children have returned, and we have a new one tonight (Oracle47) who just doesn't get the encyclopedia thing. Newman is refraining from dissing him, but is poaching one of his articles, though I did the same to Ac15sam today when he tried to add a paragraph to the formerly single-photo-only Tim Tebow. 00:54 PS--Am looking at List of Sonic Characters Nobody's Ever Heard Of (huffed and salted against re-creation). Spıke Ѧ 00:59 25-Sep-13

Found this on the mirror site, and it looks very suspiciously similar indeed. Huff away. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 01:08, September 25, 2013 (UTC)

And I again found something similar on our mag-tapes. They are gone, and he is gone. Spıke Ѧ 01:10 25-Sep-13

You are apparently not out of patience with Newman66 (format at QVFD, vote count at VFD, junk redirects) but I am very much out. And when I poached Ac15sam, I posted to his talk page first, and in any case it wasn't a brand-new page he had created. Newman's promise to stop pwning newer users than himself is overtaken by events within hours. The only saving grace is that Oracle47 is so random that he might never learn about the Watchlist or any other way of returning to his junk article. Are we the only people here tonight over twelve? Spıke Ѧ 01:21 25-Sep-13

My mistake.

I was a bit confused this time with Electra Woman & Dyna Girl. Could you change it back to the old title when it gets deleted? I made a minor mistake, and you can change it back without getting me in trouble. Newman66 Visit my table here! Contributions My works 01:54, September 25, 2013 (UTC)

Ralph the Wonder Llama

I am in a revert war with Anon here. He may be a caffeine fiend. Please break the tie. Spıke Ѧ 02:59 25-Sep-13

New documentation at UN:HAX

The toys that Denza was asking about had not been documented at UN:HAX but I just did so. However, the Watchlist toy described last is no longer working. I've just mentioned this to Puppy. Spıke Ѧ 23:11 25-Sep-13


If you would independently verify that the feature that Anon stumbled on is mostly my rewrite of late 2010, I will take a victory lap at the Hall of Shame. Spıke Ѧ 22:57 26-Sep-13

There have been few changes since you rewrote it in 2010, so feel free to put your name on it. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 23:04, September 26, 2013 (UTC)


With apologies, I have upgraded your {{WIP}} on this to an {{ICU}} with explanation, and would delete it ahead of schedule if Anon doesn't come right back to it today. No one wants an article on "Jolt!" whose text is a description of "Doh!" with the utterance changed and with Homer Simpson's name changed, and I bet that Anon thinks he has done all he needs to with it. Spıke Ѧ 13:57 27-Sep-13

Agreed. I was tempted to delete it on sight, but it seemed too long to just QVFD. I was too tired to think up a good explanation at the time for an ICU. Also, someone might search for Jolt, but probably not with the exclamation point behind it. Jolt cola for instance, might be an article topic, but I don't have enough ideas on it right now to write it. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 16:29, September 27, 2013 (UTC)

My take on Jolt (the cola with a double dose of caffeine, I am surprised you don't drink it between lattés) would be as a second installment of the signature American excess described in American cuisine, a follow-on to the notorious caffeine-laced beer sold, of course, under the Schitz label. Spıke Ѧ 17:09 27-Sep-13

Microsoft Windows

New user GUncyclopedian, apart from coming off on his talk page like a complete know-it-all and seeming to come from the spray-paint-tagger school of humor, made a change to this article that I was ready to revert, with the comment on his talk page given below; but I'll take a step back and ask you to give it a fresh look.

With apologies, I am reverting you on this article. The new illustration you added to the start of the article is primarily about Ubuntu and only in passing about Windows. The article already had an initial illustration and you specified a size for the new one that overwhelms the prior material. Importantly, virtually all the humor was done off-site. We may shamelessly steal photographs in order to cast them in a funny light, but this website is not about cataloguing or assembling humor done elsewhere. Your tag line, "We suck more," is a use of the first person that interferes with the "encyclopedia article" theme without adding much humor except to people who think that "we suck" is inherently funny. Separately, [File: ...] specifications need to occupy a line by themselves; and it is amazing that you encountered the text "a series turnings of event eventually allowed Windows saw the opportunity" and only inserted unnecessary spaces rather than try to correct it. Spıke Ѧ 20:19 28-Sep-13
Looks like he is at it again in a revert war. I guess you hadn't reverted him yet. The illustration isn't that bad - the Windows box in the illustration vaguely resembles the box that Windows 98 came in, but it is too large in comparison with the other illustrations in the article. The idea of a company admitting that they suck does have some humor to it, but not enough to warrant this huge an illustration, especially since it is out of proportion. This could be a newbie mistake, or it could be an oversized ego. So until I can tell which it is, I think I will downsize the illustration so that it does not dominate the article. Anyways, your text above seems like a good message to leave on his talk page.-- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 20:29, September 28, 2013 (UTC)

It is only a good message if I do revert him; and without a revert, I do not expect him to take my advice to heart that it is wholesale stealing of humor; as, again, it seems he is here more to leave his mark in numerous places (as with his new paragraph at Gold: "People worship gold.") than to be funny. Spıke Ѧ 20:57 28-Sep-13

If it is "stolen", then there must be somewhere it is stolen from, and that somewhere is not clear as of yet. His "marking" of articles may be newbie overenthusiasm, in which case, he should be steered to quality over quantity. True, that paragraph isn't funny, and is very short and required little effort. Too often new users think that just because they find something funny, everyone else should too. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 21:26, September 28, 2013 (UTC)

You held down the fort well tonight! By "stolen" I mean that (1) the illustration has a copyright notice at the lower right and (2) the lion's share of the humor--the Ubuntu mascot drinking Microsoft Windows, plus the legend "We suck more"--was devised (in 2001, evidently) by the artist. Like use of "motivational posters" (yeah, newbie, of course I believe you that you shooped it yourself) the Uncyclopedian here is using someone else's humor like a rubber stamp to put his mark on an Uncyclopedia article without creating original comedy. This is far different from when we steal a Pulitzer-winning photo like the Napalm child, which wasn't funny, in order to fair-use it to be a vehicle for an innovative comedy interpretation of it. Spıke Ѧ 03:55 29-Sep-13

PS--I have the same problem with the illustration, lower on the same page, "Microsoft Publishes Windows 2000 Bug List !!" (Image:Buglist.jpg, used nowhere else.) Not only was the photography and composition done offsite, so was all the humor. We ought not to have "humor" articles where large parts of the humor are pre-fab and not created by the Uncyclopedian but merely assembled from the web without attribution. Spıke Ѧ 01:24 30-Sep-13

Like it or not, many of the pictures uploaded to this site are not original. If they are used in an original way, that justifies their use, in my opinion. The question in considering whether to remove a given pic from an article to me is, would it leave a substantial hole in the article? Some picture seems better than none at all, but if there are other pictures that could fill the gap, then remove the unoriginal ones. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 01:36, September 30, 2013 (UTC)

"If they are used in an original way" is exactly the key. Repeating, I have no problem with stealing a serious wire-service photo and making it funny under "fair use," only with this stuff where someone other than the Uncyclopedian does all the humor heavy-lifting. Spıke Ѧ 01:41 30-Sep-13

Okay - I'm going to disagree, but only mildly. If an article uses less than 10% of content derived from elsewhere, that I would accept. But that's on the proviso that an article is majority one editors work. Case in point is the "Barbie colossus" I used in History of the world, which was not my original (although it was an Uncyc original, as far as I know). About 5% of the text in that was also from an older incarnation of that article, or from alternate language versions of that article. But in the case of hit and run editorial - like the editor mentioned at the start of this section - there is no valid original addition to an existing article. Having said that, article in question has been created by hit and run editors, and is in need of a decent going over.                               Puppy's talk page08:35 30 Sep 2013

UnSignpost - Reporting from the Belgian Congo

Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:54, September 30, 2013 (UTC)


This is my idea to stop that issue we had the other day. What happens at the moment if a featured page is transcluded the code from {{FA}} adds a couple of hidden links/categories, which is how the DPL recognises what was featured and when. This template adds a <noinclude></noinclude> around that code, but only when the featured page is transcluded again. So theoretically I could transclude any featured article anywhere else, but only the original featured article would be recognised as a feature. I ran a few experiments with this a year or so ago, but have no idea how it will run on current MW version - although I don't see any reason why it would have any major differences.

And unrelated - I just created User:PuppyOnTheRadio/temp3 as a replacement concept for VFD. Thoughts, additions and amendments are welcome.                               Puppy's talk page01:25 01 Oct 2013

I have copied and pasted your page onto Template:FA so that if unexpected complications come up it can be undone. Hopefully this does prevent that issue in the future. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 16:04, October 2, 2013 (UTC)

HowTo:Drive Your Car Out of A Lake

Anon replies to your photo request at Uncyclopedia:RadicalX's Corner‎. Spıke Ѧ 12:27 5-Oct-13

User CardboardVox

Thanks for welcoming CardboardVox. I filed below you to explain your revert in more detail.

However, I didn't see him come in! and in fact, we don't seem to be seeing anyone register, with one exception, since 25-Sep. As this log is one way that welcomers find new users to welcome, it's a problem, and I've reported it to Wikia, as well as the "Watchlist toy" I mention above. Spıke Ѧ 00:23 7-Oct-13

The only other registered users of the last week or two besides CardboardVox I've seen are Newmaxshoes and Oracle47. I believe that's pretty much it, and I've seen them register while when I was just viewing Uncyclopedia at that time. Newman66 Visit my table here! Contributions My works 00:28, October 7, 2013 (UTC)
Yes, the user creation log appears to be borked. This should be reported as a bug to Wikia. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 03:14, October 7, 2013 (UTC)

I did report the user creation log bug (ticket #104779) and Sean McGilvray emails that Wikia was aware of it and is actively working on a fix. Spıke Ѧ 14:06 7-Oct-13

I also reported the user creation log bug, so hopefully it will get some priority. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 15:42, October 7, 2013 (UTC)

Does this mean…

…I need to take you off my friends list?

Actually, what's the purpose of a friends list? Do people have to make lists of friends in case they forget who they are? Is this an anti-Alzheimer's strategy?                               Puppy's talk page08:01 08 Oct 2013

What happened is that Newman66 had publicly posted a list of friends on his userpage. The problem with this type of list is the potential drama it can create when someone discovers they are not listed on said list. Making public lists of friends is something I would rather not see on this site for that very reason. If you want to make a list on a piece of paper and keep it a secret, feel free to do so, but I don't want to see that kind of thing on this site where everyone can see it. Advertising who your friends are, also advertises at the same time who isn't your friend, if you understand what I am saying here. Hopefully everyone here is mentally capable of remembering who their friends are without having to make a list. Sadly, I do know an elderly gentleman (who doesn't edit here, he can't read anymore and wouldn't know how to use a computer anymore) who does have Alzheimer's. Usually what happens in that case is that they forget they even made a list in the first place. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 08:14, October 8, 2013 (UTC)
Is it insensitive to make Alzheimer's jokes now?                               Puppy's talk page08:35 08 Oct 2013
“I have Jewish Alzheimer's: I forget everything but the grudges”
~ Heard from local politicians. (The stated ethnicity varies.)
Being left off Newman's new list of friends did not factor in my ban last night--Putting me on it would have been more outlandish--except as a kickoff to his short evening of manufacturing politics to play. Anton199 has a list of acquaintances on his user page, but for the clear purpose of steering readers to useful resources--It more identifies useful tips he has received than personalities. Nevertheless, Simsie is exactly right that any list of Uncyclopedians raises instant questions regarding the people not listed. I concede to Puppy that allowing voting against individuals has some of the same problems. And it might be time to take that joke page where we "vote" to ban certain Uncyclopedians (though it never happens, and it's supposed to be lighthearted, but any serious undercurrents were visible) and put it on VFD. Spıke Ѧ 09:06 8-Oct-13

Article deletion

[Relates to Op huffing an article with Summary: "Not funny for sober people. Read HTBFANJS.: protip - don't bother telling a female admin that she has a small penis"]

Okay, you played the trump card of having a female deal with me. You were probably unaware that I am psychologically incapable of being rude to a lady. I hereby apologise for the penis joke and I would like to add that I bet you have great boobs :) See you in 2018. The preceding unsigned comment was added by (talk • contribs)

All of our admins have great boobs.                               Puppy's talk page01:46 08 Oct 2013

Reality check

Would you use your greater familiarity with popular culture to check my opinions that—

  • The recent changes to Homestuck that I reverted were rant, not humor; and
  • Yesterday's edits to Piccolo, which I haven't yet reverted, as they were made by a veteran Uncyclopedian, are a case of verbal diarrhea, which isn't humor either? Spıke Ѧ 15:51 8-Oct-13
I don't know enough about Homestuck to tell if it could be an in-joke or not, but it does look like a rant. The edits to Piccolo actually look like an improvement to me over what was there before. It does tend to be random humor however. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 20:21, October 8, 2013 (UTC)

Okay, thanks. Now, who is this #69688 that you have unbanned? The reference to UN:OFFICE in the Summary suggests it's Newman66, but Romartus already unbanned him this morning. Spıke Ѧ 20:38 8-Oct-13

That is the autoblock that automatically bans Newman66's IP, so since Newman66 is unbanned on parole, yes this is an attempt to make sure that Newman66 can edit now, subject to the restrictions in UN:OFFICE. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 20:41, October 8, 2013 (UTC)

When one unblocks an Uncyclopedian, there is an autoblock that remains in effect? How does one know this? The Block Log doesn't show anything about it, until your unblock. Spıke Ѧ 20:58 8-Oct-13

If you go to Special:BlockList (also can be found under the link to blocked users from recent changes), you will see a 5 digit number when you block someone with a registered name, with the same blocked reason that was given when the username was blocked. This is the autoblock that keeps the user from coming back as the same IP that they used when they were blocked. When the user is unblocked, if the autoblock is not also unblocked, they still cannot edit if they are using the same IP. On a completely different topic, is it time to archive this page again? -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 01:33, October 9, 2013 (UTC)

Would you look at that. Archive? It's up to you; it's not yet to the point where opening up the entire page for edit slows down my PC (though mine is). Wikia replied to my other bug report (Bizzeebeever's "watchgadget" has failed). The Help Desk says nothing at Wikia that would affect it has changed recently but will pass it onto techies. I noted the bug at UN:HAX and, just now, the {{Logo}} hack, which BetterSkatez just tried to do at Moon with another technique that produced no result. Spıke Ѧ 01:54 9-Oct-13

The Libertines

This is the only article I left unpatrolled. It seems to have been visited by a fanboy but I can't figure out whether his edit is an improvement. Spıke Ѧ 23:38 14-Oct-13

Some of it appeared to be an improvement, and some of it did not. I undid the stuff that seemed too obviously fanboyish, but left in the stuff that seemed funny. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 17:08, October 15, 2013 (UTC)


Thanks. Next patrol question: Is it worth reverting BetterSkatez2012 here? A page on a .jpg no more needs an alternate logo than an article's talk page; it is to guide Uncyclopedians and not to amuse our readers. Spıke Ѧ 12:29 16-Oct-13

It may be worth a gentle nudge on his talk page. His contribs suggest he may be starting a habit of this. While it's not vandalism, it's not a fruitful endeavour IMHO.                               Puppy's talk page01:03 16 Oct 2013
You want me to do the nudging, then? Spıke Ѧ 13:18 16-Oct-13
Yes. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 19:49, October 16, 2013 (UTC)

OK, done. Spıke Ѧ 20:01 16-Oct-13

VFD archive size

It was you who noticed that Archive275 was bulging and created Archive276. Mimo&maxus has volunteered to poopsmith VFD and I told him that creating new archives would be an additional good poopsmithing job. What do you regard as a "full" VFD archive? Spıke Ѧ 13:18 16-Oct-13

Normally a month's worth of VFD is a full archive, but I haven't been keeping track of the VFD archives lately. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 19:47, October 16, 2013 (UTC)

I don't like that criterion, as the size of the archive file varies according to how busy VFD is. But I would not mind at all if the naming scheme actually identified the month in question. Several times I've found dialog that suggested that a given article was VFD'd on a certain date, and have to find the archive by binary search. Spıke Ѧ 20:01 16-Oct-13

Renaming all the VFD archives would be a long and tedious process, plus all of the pages tagged with {{oldvfd}} would have to be updated with the new archive page name. If you can think of a better criterion for archiving the VFD, feel free to come up with one. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 21:15, October 16, 2013 (UTC)

No, I would absolutely not rename existing archives. In fact, a couple years ago someone saw fit to rename "archivennn" to "Archivennn" and got tired from the follow-on editing that you describe, before he got all the way back. Spıke Ѧ 21:32 16-Oct-13

A good job for a poopsmith then?
Having said that, if we were to archive articles based on the calendar month by UTC, and we were happy to date {{oldvfd}} to the date that it was archived, it's possible we could create a new template tag to create the link direct from the date added to the template, and attach the template as {{templatename|~~~~~}}. The template could get the page name in question from the talk page it's attached to. And if you're happy for this to be added as the last item on the talk page, rather than at the top (append rather than prepend), we can automate most of the adding of it from {{VFDc1}} - which could also determine if {{oldvfd}} has recently been added. Make sense, or am I talking in gibberish without realising?                               Puppy's talk page04:17 17 Oct 2013

I understand it, but that doesn't prove anything. We could indeed automate most of this. But it's a lot easier for the nominator to find any {{Oldvfd}}s at the top rather than at what was the bottom of the page at the time the article was Kept. Now, although we never have to attach a template to a page whose result was Delete, I often write something other than Kept; for instance, Rewritten and Kept, or Userspaced. Spıke Ѧ 22:47 19-Oct-13

So, have you guys agreed on when should a new VFD archive be created? Because the current one's pretty big right now and someone should probably create a new one real soon. --Mimo&Maxus (Talk) 23:13, October 19, 2013 (UTC)
Puppy, as background, I told M&m it is the Poopsmith's call (that would be he) but this time he should wait to transition to a new Archive when we transition to your new VFD system. Spıke Ѧ 01:11 20-Oct-13

Fart King

Mimo&maxus is right, on its talk page. This deserves a worse fate than {{WIP}}, and faster. 22:43 19-Oct-13 PS--Now seconded by Newman66 in the same place. I'm #3. Spıke Ѧ 01:11 20-Oct-13

I have deleted the page, since three users concur, and I was tempted to huff it earlier myself, but refrained since it had more than 2 paragraphs and I had not seen the Wikipedia article it was copied from. Since there seems to have been no significant improvement on the article today, I have deleted the article. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 06:34, October 20, 2013 (UTC)

KendraDancy's talk page

As you can see, someone else used my own welcome template on that talk page, which they should have used a different template, like {{Welcome}} instead. If you can handle this, Sims, you can substitute the welcome template with your replacement instead. Newman66 Visit my table here! Contributions My works 17:35, October 20, 2013 (UTC)

Thanks for bringing this to my attention. I will go take care of that. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 21:21, October 20, 2013 (UTC) Update: I used subst to move the copy of the template to the page and remove your name off the welcome message, since you weren't the one doing the welcoming. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 21:26, October 20, 2013 (UTC)


Sims. Nothing I said yesterday was directed to you. I didn't even see your last edit and I regret you got caught up in it. You're one of the most grounded and nicest users in uncyclopedia land and a bitching admin. Maybe even an epic admin. I wouldn't say that you are a cosmic admin...because then I would have to compare you to all the admins on all the planets of the universe and I'm only familiar with the wiki's of Earth and a few nearby earth like planetoids...and even then they are only wiki's about syncopated music and stylish kneck tie knots. I suppose I could call you a galactic admin...but not a cosmic one. I think hyperbole can only stretch so far if you know what I mean. But respect is due where respect is due and so we will just leave it at "you are a solar wind moon shine like admin which sounds gay but it also sounds nice. Anyways...sorry Sim. --ShabiDOO 00:24, October 21, 2013 (UTC)

Apology accepted: I suspected it wasn't directed at me, but Spike is right about that kind of sentiment should not be directed at another Uncyclopedian. Spike included. So if you intended it towards Spike, you should apologize to him too. Unfortunately, your ban (and Denza's ban also) seems to have touched off a firestorm in the forums, which now we admins have to deal with. I hope this will calm down soon and everyone will move on. But thanks for the compliments. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 01:49, October 21, 2013 (UTC)

When a single post can become a source for drama, a newspaper becomes a deadly weapon

Have fun reading it!

Anton (talk) 17:45, October 21, 2013 (UTC)

Don't rush VFD

Don't jump the gun! Authors are entitled to 24 hours before we delete their articles. Spıke Ѧ 19:49 22-Oct-13

Are you sure you meant to write this here Spike? --Mimo&Maxus (Talk) 20:13, October 22, 2013 (UTC)

Yes, unless it was you who deleted 2009 World Bloodbath Classic. Spıke Ѧ 20:20 22-Oct-13

Oops, forgot to check the timestamp. How clumsy of me. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 20:30, October 22, 2013 (UTC)
Thanks! You can hit it again in a couple of hours. Mimo, surprised that you aren't the only one who gets rules read to him?! Spıke Ѧ 20:34 22-Oct-13
I wasn't online when she deleted it. --Mimo&Maxus (Talk) 20:41, October 22, 2013 (UTC)
Everyone knows Simsie is a renegade admin who plays hard and fast by her own rules, and doesn't give a damn about what “the man” demands!                               Puppy's talk page08:52 22 Oct 2013
She has met her match, as my history is not giving a damn about what "the woman" demands. Spıke Ѧ 21:09 22-Oct-13
It'll be ban hammers at high noon, mark my words.                               Puppy's talk page09:14 22 Oct 2013
Time's up! and I did justice to the two Bloodbath articles. FYI, those clocks don't increment until someone edits the page or does a ?action=purge. Spıke Ѧ 22:30 22-Oct-13

Pee Review of Ted Cruz

I reverted your fastest-review-in-history at Pee Review, as the article in question was created in userspace. I gave a mini-review at User talk:Xzd5bp‎. Spıke Ѧ 18:23 23-Oct-13

Thanks, I hadn't thought to look there. I wondered why someone would submit a title that hadn't been created yet at all to Pee Review. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 18:27, October 23, 2013 (UTC)

Worst songs to play at a funeral on VFH

Puppy adds his no vote to Shabidoo's non-vote that this article remains too "listy." I replied as a comment that they had no idea what we started with. However, you re-added examples from the original article wherever possible, in consideration of the original contributors. Would you please re-visit it and see if you think it is better to limit each section to the best 3 or the best 5, or decide whether there are specific list items that don't add a unique angle but "retell the same joke over and over." Spıke Ѧ 21:55 23-Oct-13

It probably wouldn't sway my vote. The listy aspect is part of the concept, and without completely changing that you'll still end up with a list. It may be trimmed from 100 to 10 item, but still be a list. And it's rare that I find lists funny. Give me prosaic, poetic or encyclopaedic writing and I'm happy. Lists and images (generally) don't float my boat.                               Puppy's talk page10:15 23 Oct 2013
I take it you're not a fan of Almost everything they do there is in list format, though filled out with details. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 22:18, October 23, 2013 (UTC)
I've looked at cracked a few times. Doesn't do much for me for exactly that reason, but I've taken one or two jokes from there to use elsewhere.                               Puppy's talk page10:37 23 Oct 2013

What's with the Tables of Contents today?

Do you see it too? When JavaScript is disabled, the Table of Contents is a Show/Hide toggle that is hidden and won't come out. When JavaScript is on, you can click Show, but the sections appear in the form: 1. 1 History Spıke Ѧ 22:26 23-Oct-13

For me, the Table of Contents automatically displays without a show/hide option, and I always have JavaScript on on my computer. I will check the site using my iPad. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 22:33, October 23, 2013 (UTC)
Nevermind, for now my router doesn't seem to be allowing my iPad to connect to my own home network. Unfortunately, it has been this way the past few days. Might be time to reset the router soon. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 22:35, October 23, 2013 (UTC)
I noticed that as well. I had a feeling there was a preference to have it set as auto show (or auto hide) but can't seem to locate it now. It's slightly distracting, but not too damaging.                               Puppy's talk page10:40 23 Oct 2013
I see now its as well in the hebrew eincyclopedia fix it as soon as possible and i will give you all my cosher bacon... i think that if you'll fix it in the english one it will be fixed up in the hebrew one as well 20:08, October 25, 2013 (UTC)
I have reported this bug to Wikia and cited this section and the section at User talk:Romartus. The screen shot you provided tells us nothing more than we already see. Check back here for developments. Spıke Ѧ 20:34 25-Oct-13
Probably need to address it to Special:Contact, as it seems to be Wikia-wide. And how do you circumcise a pig?                               Puppy's talk page08:39 25 Oct 2013
That is how I did it. As instructed by Simsie last time. I don't know; how do you circumcise a pig? Spıke Ѧ 20:44 25-Oct-13
oh its very easy circumcise a pig you just take is dick put some holly water take the huge hammer, exe, flame thrower and spinach and than put some holly water on the pig's dick, roast it a bit with the flame throwe, smack it hard with a hammer, gently cut it and put some spinach to decorate the dick 20:53, October 25, 2013 (UTC)

Received from Wikia

Hello SPIKE,

Thanks for contacting Wikia. The rendering of the Table of Contents did indeed change this week with the introduction of Lazy Loading TOC. This reduces page load time by 2-4%.

The Uncyclopedia issue where doubled TOC section headers appear is unique to Uncyclopedia it seems. I have filed a ticket about that with our performance team.

Hope this explanation helps and thanks in advance for your patience.

Timothy Quievryn
Director of Technical Support
Wikia Community Support Team
Copied here Spıke Ѧ 20:01 26-Oct-13

User Pneshati

This user's initial clean-up at Christopher Hitchens was so good that I praised him on his talk page; then he went on to mostly speculate that Hitchens was a sexual pervert who died of AIDS (a laugh riot); before creating the utterly unfunny AIDS pandemic, which might deserve worse than the {{ICU}} that I gave it. Would you take a second look? Spıke Ѧ 23:16 23-Oct-13

Ok, I have done so, and I decided it isn't worth keeping around. The concept is so poor that it could hardly be improved into a proper article. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 01:46, October 24, 2013 (UTC)

Ted Cruz and new user xzd5bp

I read your comments regarding the article I submitted. I appreciate your insight. (I'm not being sarcastic or spiteful!) The critiques make sense and I agree with them. Unfortunately, I wrote it strictly for a specific audience of haters. So I guess it would be inappropriate to post it on this web site. I asked the admin person to dispose of the draft.

I appreciate you taking the time to create a constructive review. I'll keep your insights in mind when I write non-biased articles (or even technical reports).

Best Wishes,


Thanks for your reply. As your article is in your own userspace, you can keep it there and return to it if you eventually find a way to make it suitable for our cross-spectrum hatership readership. Spıke Ѧ 15:43 24-Oct-13

Push present

The author came back to this after I slapped {{ICU}} on it, but in my opinion did not address any of the issues raised, nor give any reply on his talk page. Can you do anything with this? Is it worth it? Spıke Ѧ 00:14 26-Oct-13

This concept is not one I am familiar with, except in the context of a baby shower present, and I doubt I found it any funnier than you did, which is to say I didn't find it funny in the least. It reads to me more like an attempt to make fun of a materialistic ex-wife, or soon-to-be ex-wife, who apparently wanted a gift of something more than baby clothes, baby furniture, baby supplies and the baby as a reward for giving birth. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 00:53, October 26, 2013 (UTC)

Then I am going to abort it. 00:59 Nah, it had a few funny lines in it so I tried rewriting it without most of the bitterness. You are welcome to expand and/or illustrate it, as you seem to know something about baby showers. Spıke Ѧ 01:59 26-Oct-13

Baby showers are caused by freak tornados in birthing centres.                               Puppy's talk page02:26 26 Oct 2013

Mimo has opined at VFH that there is not quite enough content here. I have added to the birth of Jesus the medieval birth of Mordred, but am drawing a blank on one or two other significant births in history in which the mother might have been bought off. Spıke Ѧ 19:00 28-Oct-13

The Wikipedia entry on "Miraculous births" may be of some use, but I am not sure which would be considered persons as opposed to deities born in this way, and which would be familiar to someone of Western culture (some are Eastern mythology). -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 19:53, October 28, 2013 (UTC)

Who knew Wikipedia had such a page?! I can filch something from this; thanks. 20:06 PS--I don't know. The article has one Golden Child and one Golden Shower, and we have Ganesha for the devoutly avaricious, but this is not much to go on, and I'd rather go forward through history than backward to mythology. Spıke Ѧ 20:31 28-Oct-13

Sorry I can't be of more help. Looking up "Virgin birth" on Wikipedia also leads to the "Russell case", a court case where the wife actually claimed she had a virgin birth (something about used sponges and all that). Might have some comedy potential there. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 20:39, October 28, 2013 (UTC)

New user Maria Eduarda

This brand new user seems to have given herself a very old user page (referencing Hinoa) but otherwise taken up where nuked vanity user Amilton de Cristo - (Pastor) left off, including uploading a cartoon identical to one previously deleted except for the absence of a vanity photograph smack in the middle. Spıke Ѧ 23:30 28-Oct-13

Check out User:Splaka. I think you will find the two pages nearly identical. I am tempted to remove the templates that aren't true of this new user, unless this new user turns out to in fact be a reincarnation of Splaka or something. 00:05, October 29, 2013 (UTC) I have deleted the user page, since I see you banned the user already, and the user isn't going to change it so that it is more accurate. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 00:09, October 29, 2013 (UTC)

Hell's MasterChef

Would you please help us evaluate this article as discussed at User talk:Mimo&maxus? Spıke Ѧ 19:09 29-Oct-13

See my reply there. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 20:25, October 29, 2013 (UTC)
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