User talk:ScottPat

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Before writing a comment on my talk page you might want to consider a few things:

  • I only respond to ye in the tongue of Scots, en espanol, madein upein Deutsch or in BBC English. If you don't speak in one of those languages then your comment may be ignored.
  • If you want to have a discussion irrelevant to Uncyclopedia and want to talk to me about my own views on such matters then please go ahead but be warned.
  • If you post a message here and your nation does not have a flag then you run the risk of being colonialised. Then we shall run your account for you.
  • I am a friendly user and I don't mind what you post on the page as long as it is not vandalism.

Archives:

House Cleaning

Glad to see you keep your pages tidy! --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 07:46, September 12, 2013 (UTC)

AHSKDJHDJH - Whoops, dropped something there! Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:08, September 12, 2013 (UTC)

UnSignpost/20130915

What about creating the UnSignpost which may as well be the last one? There are two "long" articles by Spike and Puppy and several short messages that you added at the UnSignpost/News. I think this is enough. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 15:15, September 14, 2013 (UTC)

I'll create one tomorrow. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 17:19, September 14, 2013 (UTC)
Ok, sure. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:20, September 14, 2013 (UTC)
Oh sorry didn't realise you'd started one. I'll help edit and finish it then. Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 06:52, September 15, 2013 (UTC)
I think it is ready now. Just needs to be checked by you and it can go to print. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 07:51, September 15, 2013 (UTC)
In fact I'll send it out anyway and you can change if you want afterwards. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 08:50, September 15, 2013 (UTC)

UnSygnposte Delieverie

Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 09:11, September 15, 2013 (UTC)

I wasn't quite done yet

But thanks for looking at the article anyway. It was quite a fixer-upper project. - Jonny appleseed (talk) 17:14, September 16, 2013 (UTC)

No probs it looked great. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 17:46, September 16, 2013 (UTC)
When you edit in mainspace, having another Uncyclopedian kibitz is a known risk. An alternative if you want privacy is to create an article in userspace, such as User:Jonny appleseed/HowTo:Change a Lightbulb. And to kibitz further: That initial list is absurdly long, there is one joke (ridiculous ingredients) that it tells too many times, and Anon will arrive at midnight and add junk to it forever. Happy editing! Spıke ¬ 18:06 16-Sep-13
Yep I agree ditch the list and make a paragraph for materials instead. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 18:23, September 16, 2013 (UTC)

PSulivan

Forum or not, must we go here? It was either yet-another rage-quit, in response to a revert of an evening of truly awful edits (which I point to in the Forum), or (perhaps to change the subject) it is, as PSulivan claimed last, a completely personal decision unrelated to events on the site. (In which case, why the broadcast?) Unless you have a plan to make this really funny, I might focus on other news (which assumes there were other news).

I might even pass over this morning's ban of Newman66, on the charge of: More Of The Same. Spıke ¬ 18:12 21-Sep-13

I didn't realise it was a rage quit. I am extremely tired and the news needed desperately updating. It was either a blank page or this. If you have a better idea, please go ahead. I have made it clear recently through an attempted yet failed resignation that I cannot fully carry out the responsibilities I am required of in my job as Chief Editor. I truly apolagise and I try to do my best to help this community and it's (hugely biased) media in every way I can despite my lack of time. Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 18:22, September 21, 2013 (UTC)

(Before edit conflict) PS--I hope never to tell you what to print in the UnSignpost, and am not doing so now; only how it looks to me, how it might look to others, and whether I think it violates one of our ground rules such as civility. However, regarding really funny above, what you've got so far would not be. It is one more boot in the arse on his way out the door (granted that that buttock already had my bootprint on it). In the unlikely case that this resignation is unrelated, piling on might be a reason for him not to return if he otherwise might.

(Reply to 18:22) I am not sure it was a rage-quit--again, he claims it was not--but it came on the heels of those bad edits. I do not prefer a blank page but am always willing to tolerate a delayed press date. Let's hope Anton reads this and has some ideas. I am unaware of any real website news except a certain cryptic announcement (an announcement of a future announcement) on the Site Notice up top. Perhaps Romartus will write the lead story for the next issue. Spıke ¬ 18:28 21-Sep-13

Thanks Spike. I was wondering what the banner was about. It doesn't have a link to a page describing what it is actually advertising though! Hopefully it will be a good surprise or maybe Romartus has finally written up the article summaries for the Poo Lit Surprise! Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:08, September 21, 2013 (UTC)
Romartus and I actually did visit Wikia headquarters in San Francisco in July. Neither of us have yet discussed this with the community yet though: Romartus has probably been too busy, and I have been too distracted. All I will say right now, so not to spoil the surprise, was that there were several team meetings, and a pleasant dinner cruise in the fog. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 19:41, September 21, 2013 (UTC)
Oh that's cool. So you two met each other in person, which must have been nice. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:51, September 21, 2013 (UTC)
I am very intrigued by the banner and I hope that we will read an interview about the future of Uncyclopedia or something of this kind. It is cool that some people who know each other only virtually really meet in real life and I think more of us should have such visits. Responding to Scott and Spike, Scott's entry seems funny to me (the quit does not seem to be a rage one and is not very significant, that's why making it significant is funny [what I meant here is that it was not really a sensation]) and I think I will write something too. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 10:52, September 22, 2013 (UTC)
Thanks Anton. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 10:57, September 22, 2013 (UTC)
You are welcome. And I have another idea, I will write about it soon. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 11:44, September 22, 2013 (UTC)

Hampsters

I deleted your comment to keep the ballot for Hampster as short as possible for the benefit of other users. There is a report generated nightly, Special:BrokenRedirects, that identifies redirects that point to deleted pages. The next Admin who looks at this would delete Hampsters as a matter of course. (Look at the Huff Log: I just serviced this page this morning and caught a flurry of pointers to the deleted Where's Waldo.) Cheers. Spıke ¬ 13:23 22-Sep-13

OK. Didn't realise. Sorry about that and thanks for explanation. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 13:26, September 22, 2013 (UTC)

10 Downing Street

FYI, a way to preserve this initial quotation without "compromising formatting" (your gripe in your Change Summary) would be just to replace the unusual initial use of {{Cquote}} with {{Q}} or even {{Wilde}}. Nevertheless, I agree with you main point that this particular quote isn't funny enough to justify Cquote, as it isn't funny to me at all, unless Number 10 means something to Brits apart from 10 Downing. Spıke ¬ 13:29 22-Sep-13

I don't think it is particularly funny either. I didn't delete it on the basis on formatting but on the basis of humour with a note that it disrupted formatting anyway. The only joke was that when a Prime Minister is no longer a Prime Minister he cannot live in No.10 hence if he hates the house, he changes his job. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 13:42, September 22, 2013 (UTC)

That alone might explain some twists-and-turns in modern British politics and is worth developing. Spıke ¬ 13:48 22-Sep-13

Hmmm...perhaps. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 13:53, September 22, 2013 (UTC)

The mirror

The history is mentioned here. As the most common use of the Mirror is to resurrect pages after the consensus has voted to delete them, your query perhaps should not have been a broadcast. Spıke ¬ 16:06 22-Sep-13

OK, sorry. Remove my forum if necessary then. Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 16:10, September 22, 2013 (UTC)

Ballots

I have reverted your challenge to DSA510 on VFD. Except for what we might call "points of information," ballots at VFD and VFH ought not turn into debates; I recommended in my Change Summary that you question his vote on his talk page. Cheers. Spıke ¬ 19:19 26-Sep-13

OK. Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:20, September 26, 2013 (UTC)
I have taken it to him myself at User talk:DungeonSiegeAddict510. Spıke ¬ 20:04 26-Sep-13
Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 20:06, September 26, 2013 (UTC)
You had better give me the by-line on the Wikia site visit story, as I used phrases like "this correspondent" in it, when you publish it, evidently on the "27st." Spıke ¬ 21:03 26-Sep-13
The "by-line?" What do you mean? Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 05:34, September 27, 2013 (UTC)
I mean cite me as the author to give meaning to those phrases. By the way, now I think reverting you on VFD was an overreaction (or a reaction to what might have developed rather than what you wrote). Spıke ¬ 05:49 27-Sep-13
I presume here you mean Aleister's vote to keep. I hope we can extinguish un-funny content on this wiki personally but there's nothing I can do in the face of democracy. As to the "by-line" I thought that UnSignpost had got rid of them when it changed format but I now see that Anton slipped them into last UnSignpost. I deliberately had been ommiting them before as I thought that we need to start loosening our grip on taking credit for everything and having our trademark stamped on everything (apart from actual articles). On that note I am going to remove the UnSignposts from my articles userpage and bibliography. However if you think the "by-line" should still stay let me know. Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 06:01, September 27, 2013 (UTC)
I do think the by-line should stay; the article reads strangely without knowing who wrote it.
I did not hope to change anyone's vote on VFD but merely avoid a potentially long dialogue, which I know you both are capable of, on the nature of humor (and the disposition of unfunny pages claimed to be "a shining example of the past"), occurring inside a ballot. Spıke ¬ 11:23 27-Sep-13

Is...

WWII still happening? That's the article not the actual war. --Sog1970 (talk) 21:11, September 26, 2013 (UTC)

Yes it is. Thanks for the section on Italy's War. I have been thinking about adding in a few sections myself this weekend. I expect that this article will take many months to complete but as long as people work as a community we can produce a great article. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 05:33, September 27, 2013 (UTC)
I will add a link to the front page to make people aware of this collab. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 08:18, September 27, 2013 (UTC)
Lots of blood and guts in that one. Aleister 21:37 27-9-'13

A good kind of whoring...

...appears once every thousand years. Due to the pressure of a 'no' vote on its VFH nom I've spent a good amount of time adding to and editing James Bevel's face in a cloud, and now Ize really like it. Shouldn't have nommed it in the state it was in, but now it's maybe ready. If you can take a minute for a read, it would make me smear jelly on myself (which I do on a daily basis anyway). Aleister 27-9-'13

Sure mate. I think I may be the only one left who appreciates the needs of the beggar now! Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 23:15, September 27, 2013 (UTC)

Forum:Rewrite of UN:SIG

Thanks for putting the new UnSignpost together. Now, my new Forum might be news; or might be news in the next issue, as the site visit article is unusually long. At the least, check out the Forum and the rewritten policy document. Spıke ¬ 17:01 30-Sep-13

Thanks for that Spike I think we'll bung it in the next one, We usually only do two articles each UnSignpost. By the way just a pointer that could UnSignpost article ideas be directed to the press room please where all editors can view them as my talk page may be missed out by some. I think I have made this point before when you posted an article idea on Anton's talk page so it is only fair that I stick by that point. Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 17:08, September 30, 2013 (UTC)

I tend to write to the person I see working the site when I get the notion, rather than take pot-luck at the press room, but your point is well-taken. Spıke ¬ 17:43 30-Sep-13

The new UnSignpost is very cool. Well done! Sorry for not helping you with it! By the way, I just wanted to know, why you did not put something I wrote at the USP/News. I ought to put it in the Press Room but you did make some entries for the previous issue right one the News page. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:32, September 30, 2013 (UTC)
I'm having problem with formating as shown below. Any help please?
Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:39, September 30, 2013 (UTC)

Actually I've fixed it, seems like you can't have links in the titles of articles. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:42, September 30, 2013 (UTC)

Ok. Do you think the heading for this particular issue is fine? Or should it be a normal one? If you don't think it's good, you can undo my last edit. By the way, thank you for the delivery and sorry for not helping you, as I did not have much time today. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:57, September 30, 2013 (UTC)
Not sure about heading, I would ask Spike he is better at deciding those types of things. It is I who should apolagise, I just noticed that you wrote a long news story about VFD on the newspage however for some reason I missed it, perhaps it doesn't come up in my watchlist anymore! Very funny and I'm sorry I didn't see it. Don't insert it now though as it is good to have different stories on the newspage to the ones in the UnSignpost. Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 20:00, September 30, 2013 (UTC)
You would be amazed at how the banner shows up on my PC. You either don't specify a font or specify a decorative font that I have deleted to accelerate booting, so "UnSignpost" renders in my default font, a .FON (non-scalable) font that doesn't have the size that you call for. So what I get is a 10-point font scaled to about 60-point by making every pixel a 6x6 block. In other words, you don't want my opinion. But is it too late to mention my Forum below the mention of Anton's? Spıke ¬ 20:13 30-Sep-13
Sure if you can write an article on it then plug it in on our newspage (not on new UnSignpost as too late). Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 20:17, September 30, 2013 (UTC)
Spike: That font family call should default to a serif font if all else fails. Do you have any scalable serif fonts that you haven't deleted? Adding in another option prior to falling to serif should improve your view of it.                               Puppy's talk page10:41 30 Sep 2013
It might do so. My default serif font is non-scalable. I really don't care, but still, it's why ScottPat doesn't want my opinion on the appearance. Spıke ¬ 23:11 30-Sep-13
Actually, it's not a strong likelihood that the average user will have a non-scalable serif font as their default. Given that it's probably not worth the recoding - especially as the only way I can see to completely overcome the issue is to create a single use SVG as a header, and I'm loathe to have image as header - purely for the data load issue. We'll leave it as is, and you can imagine that it's just designed to look 80's Sci-fi retro.                               Puppy's talk page09:37 01 Oct 2013
SP: I just realised I've left the templates created for USP in my user space. They should belong in template space - along with Anton's header. As for adding links to article titles - because the titles become links when transcluded onto talk pages, I've had to stop them from being links elsewhere. No real work-around for that, because it's part of the functionality that the titles link to the article, and you can't have one link going in two directions.                               Puppy's talk page10:47 30 Sep 2013
Pup, you can move the templates and we can correct the links after (I have not looked through my watchlist yet, so you may have done this already). Spike, it is bad that the banner does not work with your computer but it is not something remarkable. The same banner but with two pictures added. Scott, my story can be out-of-date for the next newspaper, so I won't insert it (unless the "My Sojourn" project would gain popularity, so it would be something worth writing about). Before yesterday, I placed a link to the article (which I should fix) and I think that it is enough for the moment. You are doing a grat job and it seems as if it was me who resigned and not you.
Well done, guys, you are all doing an excellent work! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:42, October 2, 2013 (UTC)

Mind the details at VFD

Please. In two places. Spıke ¬ 19:01 1-Oct-13

Confused here. If you are refering to the VFD templates then I have added them to articles now. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:03, October 1, 2013 (UTC)
Ok. Problem found and resolved. Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:08, October 1, 2013 (UTC)

unnews

Scottpat...I like you unnews articles and I wouldn't mind reading one on the gov shut down. There's NOTHING wrong with writing another story on the same topic. Mattsnow and I have done so a couple times to good effect. If you want to write something...just do it and the results will be decided by how you like it as your own writing/style-development/voice and only secondarily by how the community reacts to it. And purely by speculation how visitors to the site like it. Write. Write my dear skatanquerous floppity-bobbin stipllefund. --ShabiDOO 22:26, October 3, 2013 (UTC)

I haven't written an article about US Government shutting down! Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 17:27, October 4, 2013 (UTC)
Oh I see what you mean...you want me to write one. Unfortunately I am not a big fan of writing UnNews and don't have very much time at all at the moment. I currently have about 6 works in progress that I add a paragraph to everyday. They can be found at User:ScottPat/bibliography. Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 17:29, October 4, 2013 (UTC)

How I met your mother

Someone is working on an article named How I Met Your Mother. You don't want to know how I met your mother. Aleister 4-10-'13

No it can't be! You're not my father's cousin's window-cleaner's dog's vet's uncle? Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:49, October 4, 2013 (UTC)
No, but I filmed all of them at work in your mom's bed and am uploading the tape onto Youporn as we speak. She'll be rated number one this week! Aleister some time later
p.s. check out How I Met ScottPat's Mother
No, it is put back on the library shelf and you are done for the day. Spıke ¬ 20:13 4-Oct-13
Don't be that harsh on him. I think it was just a joke. If you insist on banning him only make the ban last a day please Spike. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 20:18, October 4, 2013 (UTC)
Oh you have! Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 20:18, October 4, 2013 (UTC)
That was not passing notes in the library. That was tearing the cover off a book and throwing it. It was just one day; no bad faith, just very ill-advised. Spıke ¬ 12:13 5-Oct-13
The ban was preposterous. It's bullying. --ShabiDOO 13:26, October 5, 2013 (UTC)

Since I didn't come back here and answer, iz do so now. Thanks for the support Shabidoo, and for the drinks and ganja. The play was all in fun, and I knew that after doing a sneak satire attack on ScottPat's mother, and then seeing the article "How I met your Mother" in recent changes, I couldn't even think of trying to resist, but was indeed very happy to change the name of the article to "How I Met ScottPat's Mother". This was vandalism, but like 2nd degree vandalism because it wasn't premeditated. So a one-day ban was very fair. And I bet you know how I spent that day... Aleister 14-10

United States Marine Corps

Thank you for dealing with the substance of this, as I have been mostly just cleaning up formatting. Apart from the factual inaccuracies concerning the RAF, it seems that the main reason to mention the British at all in an article on the USMC is that Brits and Yanks were wrestling for pwnage on this page (as in: which force is superior, and which was only victorious because it was bailed out by the other) — not of general interest to the non-USMC reader.

I took an interest in it only because Anon has, over the last week, added an hourly schedule of his grueling experience in Boot Camp. That whole section is hardly original humor but a trite statement of a caricature that is universal among military men. Spıke ¬ 16:19 5-Oct-13

Other War of 1812

Simsie agrees with me on CabalNet that, having asked for a vote on the question, we must respect the outcome of the vote, as the process protects you, too, in the case of hypothetical dreck that you write and don't want deleted. You are welcome to renominate it in a month and try to get the Keep voters not to vote Keep again. Anton has all but agreed to do so, and you can hope that Aleister is away at an immigration-amnesty demonstration for the requisite 24 hours. Separately, your mini-grammar lessons in the Change Summaries will be more helpful to Anon than faceless reverts, cheers! Spıke ¬ 21:51 12-Oct-13

Glad my English was correct. I was worried there, I just based my comments on my natural understanding of English. I will nom it again when I can be bothered. Not surprised Aleister is away at a protest, sounds like him. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 21:55, October 12, 2013 (UTC)

I meant to say that giving help to Anon is good; I would never venture that your grammar is correct. Spıke ¬ 22:04 12-Oct-13

Of course!Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 22:24, October 12, 2013 (UTC)

Super Smash Bros. Brawl‎

Seeing as you're on the site: Would you please take a look at this? It has grown TWO photo galleries, in which Anon has just moved an illustration that surely has nothing to do with the subject. I am an advocate of comedy writing but you might be more open-minded, so I'm asking you if you think these galleries belong in the article. Spıke ¬ 20:37 17-Oct-13

Ok I will have a look, thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 20:40, October 17, 2013 (UTC)
After a look I definitely think the galleries should be removed. We remove lists for the same reason we should remove galleries. This is an example of a gallery which fills up space with unwanted, un-funny photos that have nothing to do with article. I shall revert anon and then delete gallery. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 20:45, October 17, 2013 (UTC)
May I suggest that we add something about not encouraging galleries (next to don't use lists) in HTBFANJS?Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 20:49, October 17, 2013 (UTC)

Thanks for the review. I have had a mini forest fire on the pix that were not used elsewhere. The best were already in private galleries, PuppyOnTheRadio had one, and I found that one was better than one of the ones used at Lost in Space.

I'll have a look at HTBFANJS, but:

  1. I don't think my preference for writing over photos should be frozen into Policy. It is largely based on personal preference and a crappy metered Internet connection.
  2. It is not galleries but Randumbo that we want to discourage, and we probably already do.
  3. One thing we should discourage is stealing of photos if, by so doing, we steal someone else's joke: Motivational Posters, entire comic strips, I found one front-page mock-up from a print version of The Onion. Spıke ¬ 21:20 17-Oct-13

Puppy ran with this and added a paragraph to Sec. 8 that sums it up nicely--and has levity that should please Shabidoo as well. Spıke ¬ 21:50 17-Oct-13

And yeah


P.S. The Mmmee guy is trying to be funny. Why I hate Spike article can be moved to a different title and continued. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:52, October 19, 2013 (UTC)

One thanks thee much. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 19:56, October 19, 2013 (UTC)

When a single post can become a source for drama, a newspaper becomes a deadly weapon

Have fun reading it!

Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:43, October 21, 2013 (UTC)

Royal Mail

Sometimes it takes a fanboy to write the perfect satire, as I tried to do on Paul Ryan and the Tea Party movement. Now, you must love the British post. But Anon is in today at Royal Mail and it looks like negativism with a minimum of cleverness, though the surrounding text looks that way as well. Could you evaluate, and perhaps at least post-edit in the vicinity? One approach would be Pollyanna-ism, that is, portray the Royal Mail's production of suicides and lost man-hours as a positive. Spıke ¬ 18:29 22-Oct-13

Of course I love my half-nationalised postal service, whyever would I not want my post to be oppressed by the government! Sure will take a look after my UnSignpost clean up. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 20:16, October 22, 2013 (UTC)

1947 Horse-Throwing Competition

ScottPat...did you nominate this for VFD? I can't figure out who did...because I haven't seen VFD for a long time and I don't know how to view the entry for this article now that it's archived. --ShabiDOO 19:04, October 22, 2013 (UTC)

The nomination is at Uncyclopedia:Votes for deletion/Archive276#1947 Horse-Throwing Competition. It does seem as though ScottPat didn't tag the article with {{VFD}}. Add to list of things to claim the next ban of him is about. Shabidoo, to find the correct archive, use Special:WhatLinksHere/1947 Horse-Throwing Competition, or use the links at the bottom of UN:VFD and take a guess (this one is in the newest archive file). Spıke ¬ 19:11 22-Oct-13
Thanks SPIKE. Please be careful to put that VFD tag on articles ScottPat (assuming you were the one who nominated it). I don't look at VFD unless an article of mine is on the chopping board...and I wont be able to defend it if theres no warning. While I respect what goes on in VFD...I personally find it difficult reading some of the remarks about articles there and this adversely effects my ability to write here. This is why I don't participate...an now you know. Did you also know...however...that some countries in Africa are making great strides in supplying villages with clean drinking water and connecting people to the web. We can be sure that citizens who are well hydrated and are internet literate will become snazzy and edgy writers of the future. They may even become uncyclopedians. That's why we should support them not drinking dirty water and living in a world without WI-FI. Thats why we should donate money to them. Send your money now to: Shabidoo's totally legitimate Charity Fund. Care of: Swiss Confidential Banking Syndicate 194444124-34-d via the National Bank of Luxembourg wiring system. Your donations are tax deductible. --ShabiDOO 19:22, October 22, 2013 (UTC)
Sounds familiar. Probably nommed by me, sorry for the mistake. I'll send my money after I've paid off the last legal case I had with said company. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 20:16, October 22, 2013 (UTC)
Well. Just give me your credit card details and I'll make a 10,000 pound contribution in your name. Think of the children! --ShabiDOO 22:48, October 22, 2013 (UTC)
Don't worry I've thought about the children but have decided that the best course of action is to donate their next year's supply of pocket money to charity. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 06:46, October 23, 2013 (UTC)

QVFD

How about we don't huff the old UnSignpost infrastructure until we go through one full cycle to verify that the new stuff works? "Accept the word of one who knows." (--Captain Marvel, right?) Spıke ¬ 20:49 22-Oct-13

Actually out of the two articles on there:
  • One is a new page I created today but no longer need.
  • One is a page I have simply moved and updated. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 20:51, October 22, 2013 (UTC)

Three Forums?

All on UnSignpost upheaval? Plus a lead UnSignpost story all about UnSignpost, and a new namespace to boot? Do you reckon you could combine these Forums, newest first as Puppy has done regarding the rules changes for VFS, so we have only one Forum a day on the topic? You would not want to be known as an Uncyclopedian who cannot go down to the water-cooler without a megaphone, though you would not be alone. Cheers! (Does one say "Cheers" at the water-cooler?) Spıke ¬ 16:52 23-Oct-13

PS--Regarding "BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT!" he is now taken care of, and thanks for the rollbacks. Spıke ¬ 16:55 23-Oct-13

Oh sorry yeah. I take my trusty megaphone with me everywhere in real life anyway! Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 16:56, October 23, 2013 (UTC)

(How did I know that?!) Your QVFDs are done, thanks. Spıke ¬ 17:03 23-Oct-13

ScottPat/Star Wars Quigon Jin Strikes Back

Do you object to me putting this on QVFD? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 09:28, October 24, 2013 (UTC)

Not at all. That was an idea from a long time ago that I named incorrectly and never got round to do anything about! Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 09:31, October 24, 2013 (UTC)
Ok Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 09:31, October 24, 2013 (UTC)

With the greatest respect and fraternal feelings, you're a knobhead

That 20 article rule is there for a reason. There is an option of Uncyclopedia:Poopsmith's Lounge, but that's largely unused. I would only use it as a short term holding space (see my recent edits there). Alternatively, you can always create your own holding area, like User:PuppyOnTheRadio/stuff to delete. While I applaud your enthusiasm, flooding VFD is a genuine issue. Especially as it means other users can't avail themselves of that option.                               Puppy's talk page11:11 24 Oct 2013

What were you thinking? Regarding your one-day ban, I have only one more thing to add: I called this rule to your attention three days ago (erring only in saying that a one-day ban was my hunch; in fact, the rule says "1 day, no exceptions"), and you acknowledged the rule. Now today, you go two over, one with a Change Summary that admits you know what you are doing, that you think exhausting a personal list is more important than following the rules, and that you hope I will give you a joke ban instead. Just between you and me, I think about this stuff before doing it, and do neither leniency nor harshness (such as giving you more time for the willfullness of this violation) on a whim. If you want to open a Forum on the 20 rule, when you return, you may do so; Puppy sounds like a no vote and you have not begun to convince me. Spıke ¬ 11:45 24-Oct-13
Guys why all the fuss? I chose to get banned as it seemed my easiest option at the time. I had two articles left from the Special:Pages Community list that needed deleting and I was about to go out for the day so I put them on VFD (knowing I had gone over the limit) so when I could come back I could check the history and re-add nom them. I did not know what length the ban would be but I hoped for six hours to a day (not a week) and left a message informing you I wasn't being stupid and knew what I was doing.
With the greatest respect and fraternal feelings, you, Puppy, are a knobhead for trying to get my ban reduced allowing Spike to give me a speech that was unnecesary. It was clear I knew I was to be punished and the ban was punishment enough without Spike's speech. You are also a saviour for coming up with the brilliant idea of having a userspace VFD preperation area for over-flow noms. I will now not need to get myself banned in future. Thanks! Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 13:08, October 25, 2013 (UTC)
Welcome back! You are free to claim that getting yourself banned was part of a purposeful strategy, except for one tiny detail: The said purpose was not advanced, as your two remaining items from the Community list still need deleting! Happily, there are now exactly two free spaces on VFD. Spıke ¬ 13:17 25-Oct-13
Beat you to it! Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 13:19, October 25, 2013 (UTC)

Check my article?

Hey Scott, I was wondering if you could check one of my articles called Swiper the Fox. It needs an expansion and I will be working on it for the next week or so. But could you give me some input now so I know in what direction I should head? Dr. Medicine (talk) 04:24, October 25, 2013 (UTC)

I might have a quick look.                               Puppy's talk page06:33 25 Oct 2013
Pup, you might, but ScottPat is Dr.'s adopter. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 08:21, October 25, 2013 (UTC)
In case you hadn't noticed I was banned Anton, therefore Puppy's help was much appreciated. Thanks to both of you for the help. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 13:02, October 25, 2013 (UTC)

Categories on userspace articles

On what you are doing now: I'm not sure we have a rule, or should have, against putting categories on userspace articles. Surely categories are to help us find stuff (and so I dislike categories that simply serve as absurdly large rubber stamps) and if you think of a category as part of mainspace, it should not point into userspace. Now, this comes to pass not only because some Uncyclopedians want everyone to find the stuff in their userspaces, but more innocently when VFD decides to move an article from main into userspace; so you should avoid seeming to chide anyone for doing this. Also, like the great majority of persons, the great majority of Uncyclopedians have departed their wiki coil, and policing userspace will be endless and unrewarding. Spıke ¬ 20:23 27-Oct-13

What he said. What we do have a concern about is user space articles linked from mainspace - not so much from categories. I created a forum in February-ish this year that helps track that kind of thing down. I haven't visited that forum for a while, but it might be worth working on that before anything else user space related. Besides, I've managed to locate a couple of decent articles in other users userspace. User:Bwan/Belgium is on par with what we have in mainspace, and one I've been meaning to revisit for a while. Being able to locate these from categories can be useful.                               Puppy's talk page09:00 27 Oct 2013

As indeed ScottPat seems to have mainspaced one that he found that way — right? Spıke ¬ 21:06 27-Oct-13

Yes that is correct Spike. I agree with what you are saying and probably should have worded my change summaries differently. The articles that I removed categories from were incomplete (and looking like they will never be completed), not suitable for mainspace or already mainspaced and so did not need another link to userpage. However I agree with your comments and will not remove categories from any other articles. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 22:50, October 27, 2013 (UTC)

Vacation Bloody Good Holiday!

No - you're not allowed to!                               Puppy's talk page12:30 28 Oct 2013

A vacation? And you didn't invite all of us to go along? I thought....we....were friends.....(sigh). Anyway, have fun in Vegas (?), or Amsterdam (??) or wherever it is you are going without us. Aleister 28-10
If you really must know I spent a week on the ISS. It really wasn't that fun. More like a field trip for work. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 18:12, November 1, 2013 (UTC)
Was that you? Omygod, it's me, the cute redhead girl from Minsk. Wasn't it fun when we almost crashed into the Hubble, and you spit milk out your nose and we didn't tell anyone you had done it and it floated all over the Station and everyone else thought it was sperm!! Come on up here again soon, I'll hold down the "fort". "ALICEter" moon over Miami
Do you still feel the same way I felt about you? Was it all a dream or was there a hint of reality? Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 18:23, November 1, 2013 (UTC)
Tell me more. Tell me more. Like does he have a car?                               Puppy's talk page08:26 01 Nov 2013
Who Al? Why no these car things don't seemed to work in space according to the butler. Al did have a rocket though - in the shape of a banana - or perhaps that was ShabiDoo. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 20:41, November 1, 2013 (UTC)

News

So the Great Movement began! I moved about a dozen pages already and corrected plenty of double redirects and links inside templates. You can move pages that I haven't moved yet but don't forget about double redirects! Now, here is something new:

  • I found UnSignpost:Signup help, which is a page that helps to deliver the UnSignposts: you click on the first link and it automatically creates a new section on a user's page. This is now present in the UnSignpost:Menu (under the name of "Delivery help").
  • You can move any page that currently belongs to Uncyclopedia namespace but is something connected to the USP under the USP namespace. However, if the page itself is an UnSignpost issue, it is more complicated. In such case, if for example the page is Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/20121212, just replace the Uncyclopedia: with UnSignpost: . So the result will be UnSignpost:UnSignpost/20121212. I hope you get it. It will clarify some stuff a bit more (after I moved some UnSignpost issues to UnSignpost:IssueNumber, there was a problem with USP article template, which suddenly would not show the article, even if you clicked on the article title - and this was only one way to resolve it that I found) and hopefully won't cause headache. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:04, October 28, 2013 (UTC)
When I get the chance I'll fix that behavioural modifier, so that it will work if the name is “namespace:UnSignpost-whatever” or “UnSignpost:whatever” so we don't have to use this work-around. Hopefully tonight my time.                               Puppy's talk page09:26 28 Oct 2013
I just realised what page the UnSignpost:Signup help is. I completely forgot about creating that one. I have learned a little more wiki-fu in the meantime, so I can improve that page significantly - including having it update automatically based upon whatever is on the UnSignpost:Signup page, and creating a subsidiary page that would be whatever you're wanting to deliver, which would autopopulate in the new section. That's a fun challenge!                               Puppy's talk page08:58 29 Oct 2013
Done.                               Puppy's talk page09:16 29 Oct 2013

UnSignpost delivery

This was delivered from UnSignpost:Signup help, using the text in User:PuppyOnTheRadio/test2 as the preload information. Try delivering something to User:PuppyOnTheRadio from there!                               Puppy's talk page09:15 29 Oct 2013

When you click on the link to UnSignpost front page, there is no indication of date or issue you are reading. Or am I missing something? --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 09:16, October 30, 2013 (UTC)
That was caused by the change of the UnSignpost format in general. Right now, there is no issue that contains all the articles on the USP's main page. When there are enough articles, editors will take them and make a new issue. I think it's the time now. Thank you for the reminder! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:03, October 30, 2013 (UTC)
Once you're ready to deliver let me know. It'll give me a chance to work out the kinks in the delivery system, and put together instructions.                               Puppy's talk page07:21 30 Oct 2013
I think I left a message about it on your talk page. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:45, October 30, 2013 (UTC)

Constantly changing and not evolving newspaper - the UnSignpost

Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:26, October 31, 2013 (UTC)

Plain ninjastar...


My PRECIOUS! Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 20:11, November 2, 2013 (UTC)
Needs more Guy Fawkes. --Mimo&Maxus (Talk) 20:50, November 2, 2013 (UTC)
Yes it does my good man. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 07:26, November 3, 2013 (UTC)

Nuclear weapon on VFD

It's been totally rewritten and deserves a second look and perhaps rescinding your nomination. Spıke ¬ 17:29 3-Nov-13

Nap and his wars

I think things got out of hand on the voting page of Napolianic Wars (sp), and a page which should have made feature is hanging out to dry. If I had a part in that, my 'pologies. Of course the page is good enough to be a feature, just that some of us saw it as a chance to really submit a masterpiece. It will be featured sometime or my real name isn't Aleister 7-11

:If Napoleonic Wars ≠ featured
:Then
:Else
:If Napoleonic Wars ≠ not featured
:Then
:Seppuku →‎ Anton199
:Else
:End
:End

Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 21:53, November 8, 2013 (UTC)

Translation: Napoleonic Wars will either get featured, or not. Otherwise - seppuku. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 21:54, November 8, 2013 (UTC)
The honorable thing to do. Aleister

Welcome back from wherever!

And thanks for visiting VFD! Several Special:DoubleRedirects have sprung up in the UnSignpost namespace; can you see to them? Spıke ¬ 11:37 17-Nov-13

I am afraid that I have not actually been away. A lack of recent comedy insipiration and life getting in the way recently has led to a reduction in my edits (however check your recent changes for last 3 weeks, I have been around here and there). Thanks for the notification about UnSignpost. Could you give me specific names of pages with this problem please? Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 12:41, November 17, 2013 (UTC)

I meant welcome back to the website, not welcome back from Mecca or something. Yes, the muse is sometimes fickle for all of us. For the list, just click on the link above. Spıke ¬ 13:22 17-Nov-13

Ah-hah, the Knock list! Thanks. Yes, Mecca, not sure it's quite my idea of a holiday. Saw a bill-board advertising a holiday Oman the other day and liked the look of the picture. If I wanted to go on a pilgrimage there's always Wincester to Canterbury (following in the footsteps of Chaucer) however I think that I'd just annoy the people who are actually religious. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 13:30, November 17, 2013 (UTC)

I hear that place is good for Omanism [sic]. I took a pilgrimage to Manchester yesterday, where there is a nice Chinese take-away. Spıke ¬ 15:04 17-Nov-13

Do I presume you are talking of a Manchester in New Hampshire, or in Lancashire? Either way Lancashire or New Hampshire, the pilgrimage to food sounds good to me. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 16:40, November 17, 2013 (UTC)

So good that I may make another today. No, Lancashire is too far for lunch. Spıke ¬ 16:52 17-Nov-13

I have to say although I have travelled through I have never stayed in Lancashire. Wonderful place I'm sure. I wasn't feeling like too much of a pilgrimage today so I just kept it short and went to the kitchen. Sir ScottPat (talk) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 18:48, November 17, 2013 (UTC)
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