User talk:SPIKE

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search
  • Please add any new topics at the end to be sure they are noticed.
  • Don't split conversations between pages, for the benefit of future readers.
  • Post to User:SPIKE/UnNews about UnNews and UnNews Audio.

edit Archives

edit Jat people

hello spike. i notice you have reverted my edit. no, i do not own wiki. i reverted it to my version only because of vandalism by some chauvinistic jats (i am jat myself). see here: (...)

also, before it was vandalized, it was voted for deletion by someone who took offence but it was voted to be kept:

then it got vandalized.

i have been an active participant and have contributed profusely and have been banned twice. i have no regrets and no wish to create an account. i also have no desire to argue with you (primarily the reason i got banned earlier, LOL -- for arguing with admins). i am undoing your revert -- if you revert it back, i won't interfere further. yenjaay!

I did not have to revert it, as fellow admin Romartus came to the same conclusion as I did. Both of us voted on VFD to keep this, but I reverted some vandalism (which you thus twice reinstated). You do act as though you own the article, as you accuse editors with different goals of "vandalism," and accuse nominator Pelozurian of "taking offence" rather than simply believing that this is a mediocre article, as I do too. Even if it is about Jats. Even the Wikipedia article is mediocre and tending toward vanity. And I don't care about your blog. You will find that Admins nowdays are as uninterested in drama as the generation of Admins that banned you. Good day. Spıke Ѧ 11:36 6-Jan-15
By the way, I see that part of my clean-up was to remove a half dozen places where you included an email address and an advertisement for a book. This was at least retelling the same joke way too often, and at most a misuse of the website. And as Romartus told you in his Change Summary, your old version is full of tedious lists. In summary, you have twice tried to restore a much worse version from the past, with accusations toward many others, just because it is your version. Spıke Ѧ 11:42 6-Jan-15
you are absolutely right. but i am a damn good writer (comic and otherwise). this piece is good and my other pieces are testimony to kick ass prose: Nepal Taj Mahal Kamasutra Steel. i have been a prolific contributor. i left because i found most stuff juvenile and mediocre, LOL.
i presume a lack of familiarity with the sub continent will make you miss the humour. yes, that must be it. the other conclusion is that you guys are poor writers and critics (equally tenable but i will give you guys the befit of doubt). take care!
scratch all of above. what a silly contributor to uncyclopedia(!) thinks about my prose should not matter. take care!
also, thanks for voting for keep and finding the pidgin endearing. that was the point of the article! as was a mockery of the rather tedious and chauvinistic write up in wikipedia!

edit Invasive species

How right you were. started editing the above to try to improve it and then realised it was utter garbage. Ended up rewriting the whole thing. I suppose that still counts as editing. Anyway, it's an article the site should have something on. --Sog1970 (talk) 16:25, January 6, 2015 (UTC)

About a half dozen other articles link to it (about half the time, in See also). Your work is not yet on the main page, but the name of it is. Thanks for earning a VFD save. Spıke Ѧ 16:58 6-Jan-15

edit Bigblunt40

This is Bigblunt40 and You are a Cyberbully

I am Not a Cyberbully as you suggest in my infinite block

I have Complained on The Uncyclopedia Irc Channel so my Block can be removed

How do You sleep at night knowing that you have Blocked for Pathetic reasons?

My image and Mrs morris page was a Joke and I thought Uncyclopedia was about Jokes

If you don't Unblock me I will move to encyclopaedia dramatics and abandon Uncyclopedia

I will be on the Irc for one Hour so we can talk so be there

Otherwise please Unblock me The preceding unsigned comment was added by (talk • contribs)

Saying mean things about someone who is not a celebrity is cyberbullying. Apart from that, your article was not of high enough quality to remain in the main encyclopedia. The IRC channel has nothing to do with this website and I never go on it. I wish you luck on other wikis, and I wish them luck with your quick recourse to playing a guilt trip. Spıke Ѧ 22:19 8-Jan-15

edit Admin abuse at Wikipedia

A serious question about upper level administrators deleting hate speech to white wash users edit histories....Does Wikipedia or any wiki actually have something like internal affairs incase one the admins is seriously crooked and vandalizing their content without anyone knowing it?

[particulars of the case deleted]

Sorry to be a crime witness instead of putting more fiction on trial; it kills the humor in me, I won't be editing again for a while. Thanks for your time. Irritable of contents (talk) 22:10, January 8, 2015 (UTC)

This website has nothing to do with Wikipedia either, though I am sure other Admins would be interested in pursuing proof of abuse of Admin power, as Uncyclopedia would not, especially laying out your particulars in the Change Summary of an Uncyclopedia edit. In any case, I have reverted your insertion of yet another initial quotation to both of our ED articles. The segue from Encyclopedia Dramatica to Erectile Dysfunction is done later in the article, and to confront the reader with a quotation that is random (until he comes to a complete stop to figure out your pun), well before the humor begins, is borderline vandalism. Happy travels. Spıke Ѧ 22:19 8-Jan-15
Thank you greatly, you're the first person to really help me with this; David Gerard politely told me to go fuck myself when I asked if he would redirect me to someone who could help me. That, plus edit warring over the importance of calling U.S. presidents slave owners, while not doing the same for Muhammad, might as well be proclaiming one's a racist who has no regard for history general.

I know those three wiki's aren't connected, I've never seen anyone on Rat Wiki other than David Gerard who professes being an Uncyclopedian; and Wikipedia doesn't even give Rat Wiki their own page. I'm just going to leave edit summaries for mentioning typos and explaining why something sucked enough to delete; which requires that I read much more than I write. I'll keep things more pertinent when I come back, though I'm glad I finally have a walking into a bar joke for my user page as classy as the knock knock one for breaking bad; I didn't think it was good enough for Starwars, but it's good enough for me.

I'll let some administrators know whats up at Wikipedia, I was beginning to think no one there would care enough just to look into it; thanks again. Irritable of contents (talk) 23:26, January 8, 2015 (UTC)

edit Jim Corr

(→‎2015: Rehab for Jim: Revert Noamshouseparty--New section was mean and not funny; included anal fist rape

I don't mind deletion, it's just that 'mean and not funny' could apply to the whole article in truth :P --noamshouseparty 21:01, January 22, 2015 (UTC)

Yes, I noticed. Luckily, I recognized your user name and even checked the page history, and this is why I neither blocked you nor rewrote the article. Drive-by slaps are the least humorous humor we have, but it's your article. However, the anal-fisting stuff was overtly unfunny; likewise the section where the article celebrated its own length. Spıke Ѧ 21:16 22-Jan-15
What is a drive-by slap? Remove the article if you like, my goal was to edit/rewrite as little as possible so that the page had the same rambling style as its subject, this including the overtly unfunny or unkind content. Aas for blocking me I wouldn't know the reason but I won't worry too much on that one either. --noamshouseparty 21:33, January 22, 2015 (UTC)
Regarding changing as little as possible, it is your article, created in 2009. If someone I don't recognize dumps a new section on anal fisting in someone else's article, then I weigh whether they should be banned. None of that is at issue here, so there is no need to get confrontational. Spıke Ѧ 21:39 22-Jan-15
Confrontational? I think there's been a misunderstanding. What I meant was that I did not rewrite my submissions, they just went out unfiltered that was kind of the purpose. So if most of it looks poor then I wouldn't object to it being deleted. Anyway I'll leave it with you. --noamshouseparty 21:47, January 22, 2015 (UTC)
Sorry; I misread the end of your 21:33 as, "no big deal if you block me." I don't know of Jim Corr (though I do own a Best of the Corrs CD), nor especially whether he is like that or whether you did a good job of writing it in his style. I don't have a problem with the article; just thought two of its sections were excessive. Spıke Ѧ 21:51 22-Jan-15

edit Christy Clark

Can you remove the protection for the Christy Clark name so I can publish it? Adamwashere (talk) 04:47, January 23, 2015 (UTC)Adamwashere

This is done and the article is moved without redirect. The article still needs Categories and real list syntax in place of lines starting with -. I think it still smells more of advocacy than humor. Spıke Ѧ 04:55 23-Jan-15

edit The Article Whisperer

Hi Spike! Thanks for completing your entries in time and thanks for doing your part of judging! I'll do whatever needs to be done whenever I have more time than now. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:59, January 16, 2015 (UTC)

edit Subjects that don't exist

I was reading your review [at Talk:Supply-side Jesus], one of the most thorough reviews I've read in a while, and I was a little struck by: "The main conceptual flaw, writing about a subject that does not exist". I have found that writing an article on a non-existent subject can be liberating because there is no brief to follow and can also make for more biting satire because it can be a fictionalised version of real things, which is possible in an article about its subject, but in a fictional article you can just state things as facts for jokes, which makes the writing more like Wikipedia. I understand that there are many important subjects without accompanying articles here and that writing more fictional articles further muddles the site, but the philosophical question behind this is: should we let the supposed necessity of having articles for every important subject effectively impede the course of some humourous opportunities? I think that there are too many mediocre articles here on people for whom something humourous is hard to right. I have often thought that we need an article on Robert Louis Stevenson, but will never write it myself because I don't know anything funny about him. --Sigphoto|(get dtf) 12:54, January 11, 2015 (UTC)

It is a rule. Like we say in all our rules, and at the start of How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid, rules are there to be broken, provided the result is excellent. But writing about real things — writing pages that an "encyclopedia reader" is likely to look up — is why we're here; we are a satire encyclopedia, not a free-form comedy blog. Over the years, writers seeking their own liberation have created other frames, from UnNews, where the way to follow the frame and produce a realistic result is clear; to HowTo, which I think is usually an outlet for the writer to amuse himself by nagging and scolding the reader. But the point here — usually — is to make your writing fit in the frame specified by the project. Stevenson? I knew nothing about Horace, except that there were a few famous people named after him that might be good for detours, until this competition. Spıke Ѧ 13:20 11-Jan-15

edit Horace wins its category

Congratulations! You won! A very deserving piece it was. I'll come back soon to give you a medal. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 15:24, January 31, 2015 (UTC)

And thank you for managing the contest, and for your effusive praise of the article; you continue to make everyone feel good about contributing here. Spıke Ѧ 15:44 31-Jan-15

Oh, thank you, it's my pleasure. Although I partly disagree with effusive, as I took some liberty to criticize your ending!

ArticleWhisperAwardGold Article Whisperer Winner
This person is a Grand Prize winner of the 1st Inter-Annual Article Whisperer Competition (2014-5), which they won for their article: Horace in the Best Vital Article category

Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 20:50, January 31, 2015 (UTC)

How could I forget?
ArticleWhisperAwardBronze Article Whisperer Judge
This person was a judge for the 1st Inter-Annual The Article Whisperer Competition (2014-15). The community would like to thank them for their contribution.

Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 20:56, January 31, 2015 (UTC)

Thanks for that too. You criticized the treatment of Horace's death as well-written but not novel. I agree the article could use a better finale, but the situation in Real Life is that "not much is known," and I'm not going with that. Your suggestions are welcome. Spıke Ѧ 00:21 1-Feb-15
I agree that "not much is known" is no better technique. What I found is that, apparently, Horace was a man very preoccupied with death, although I cannot read Latin. He also (apparently) believed that separate individuals could be exempt from death. Maybe he was trying to immortalize himself using mirrors? I don't know. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 13:29, February 1, 2015 (UTC)
Now, that is a connection I simply had not made. Stay tuned.... Spıke Ѧ 18:07 1-Feb-15
A nice ending! Now, as I started the medal business, I might as well go to the end with it.
ArticleWhisperAward Somebody has awarded you a cookie for helping TAW!
Because we can't actually pay you.
ArticleWhisperAwardGold Article Whisperer Winner
This person is a Grand Prize winner of the 1st Inter-Annual Article Whisperer Competition (2014-5), which they won for their article: NBC in the Best Requested Article category

More congratulations! And having said this, I should probably give you a medal for getting most medals in a single event in the entire history of Uncyclopedia. Are we turning Olympic? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:26, February 6, 2015 (UTC)

Thank you! Now, on the Awards table you just edited, you seem to have stuck the TAW results into last fall's PLS, and vice versa. I would simply flip them, but it's not clear how much to flip. Spıke Ѧ 17:32 6-Feb-15
Done! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 14:50, February 7, 2015 (UTC)

edit Delft edit in Netherlands page


My friends and I found it quite funny. We are international students ("foreigners") living in Delft so we know a few things about the place. As for the novelty side of things, I doubt any joke on the internet is "novel".

That being said, this site is way too restricted to allow any creative input. Instead of deleting entire entries, try improving them. Or at least let other people improve them.

“A monarchy conducted with infinite wisdom and infinite benevolence is the most perfect of all possible governments.”
~ Ezra Stiles

Unfortunately, you (admins) have none of the aforementioned qualities.

Anyway, you kind of killed the moment. Thanks. Have a good day.

P.S.: Your page on Lebanon is outdated... The preceding unsigned comment was added by 404 lie2me john (talk • contribs)

Hi John! I understand your frustration at the deletion of a paragraph you've inserted, but remember that it's not gone from history (the article's history) and if you could improve on it, it can easily be re-inserted. What Spike was telling is that the "this city is boring" joke does not work, not because it's not novel on the Internet, but because it's not novel on Uncyclopedia (which has seen dozens of additions of this type). It might be funny, when done very cleverly, but it still is the simplest humour technique you can find when you don't have much to say about the place. That being said, your paragraph is still very promising, and I am sure that by doing some research and/or editing out the too explicit moments (disease Tedium, for instance), it will work well in the article!
Concerning Lebanon, many of our articles are out-of-date, which is something Uncyclopedia needs help from editors with. If you have any ideas about Lebanon, please, don't be discouraged by the revert of your first edit (most of our first edits have been reverted). If you add something to the article, I will help you with it! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 13:42, February 1, 2015 (UTC)
I endorse Anton199's comments above. I have the time to keep Uncyclopedia from deteriorating, especially by the addition of sections that don't go in entertaining new directions; I do not have the time to research Delft sufficiently to make a contribution that didn't do so, start to do so. Fortunately, it is likely that you are situated to get it done, especially if you use some of the time you are now using making the case against Uncyclopedia and its Admins. Get started! Spıke Ѧ 18:07 1-Feb-15
Maybe it's just me, but I actually thought the Deft section was pretty good. "Located five meters below sea level, and one hundred meters below enjoyment level" was a pretty clever line in my opinion. A total revert seems a little harsh. --Pwn head Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 19:23, February 1, 2015 (UTC)
Put it back, then — perhaps with post-editing — and we'll see if what OP wrote was a (successful) appeal or just another rage-quit. Spıke Ѧ 20:39 1-Feb-15
I tweaked the section to remove the bestiality joke and I think it's better now. --Pwn head Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 21:04, February 1, 2015 (UTC)
And I post-edited you, but I still think the second paragraph, griping about the presence of Turks and Indians, is pretty generic. Spıke Ѧ 21:20 1-Feb-15
It's even better now. Makes me think of this song: [1]. --Pwn head Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 21:39, February 1, 2015 (UTC)

edit Reverting of a vote

I apologize if this question has a fairly obvious answer, but may I inquire as to the reason why Sis&bud's vote in Writer of The Year was reverted?

Thankyou.--Vavaunni (talk) 07:58, February 2, 2015 (UTC)

Pardon me for not giving you a chance to reply, but I just found out that User:Sis&bud has been banned under the inglorious criteria of 'sockpuppet'. I think I am right in assuming that sock puppeteers assume multiple identities to 'game' the wikia. The Sis&Bud is,well, not me, and I believe that our IP addresses do not coincide at all.--Vavaunni (talk) 10:11, February 2, 2015 (UTC)

Welcome back to the website after a month. Sis&bud made only one edit and went away, and that was only to DuckDuckGo, which is virtually your only contribution before you went away. Your swan song was to cast a vote without rationale, where the actual rationale is that you and I had an unpleasant conversation about your "work." When I countered your vote, the mystery user came back and cast another vote. I do not care that you/he/she can change IP addresses, nor whether he/she is you, your playground pal, or your dog. His/her/your only function on the wiki is to give your voice two votes. I hope that is all. Spıke Ѧ 11:49 2-Feb-15

I hope that my continued presence here, if only to squabble with you on your talk page, dispels the notion that the vote cast was my swan song. I am under the impression that the actual purpose of a vote cast by me is to, well, make a point to support my rationale. Can I not be given the benefit of the doubt that the casting of a vote by above-mentioned mystery user could be a coincidence? I believe that there is no definite proof exists for the laying of the basis that this user is me, my playground pal, or my dog. Yes, he/she could be a close friend(or pet) of mine, but I still labor under the impression that the vote cast should be legit. Or perhaps definite proof is not required, and an assumption made by an incumbent person here on this wiki is enough?

My purpose here is not to spar with you, but to clear certain doubts that I now have on the entire process of voting here, and on this basis I request you to entertain me temporarily.

Concerning my skewed rationale, 'conversation' would mean an exchange of information from both parties, and in this case, the only thing ever said concerning my work has been by you, while I sat dumb and mute in the background. Isn't it the vote that counts, rather than the reason or rhyme behind it? Thankyou.--Vavaunni (talk) 12:12, February 2, 2015 (UTC)


Has Wikia instituted advertising in the site notice, or is there a joke behind it that I am missing? -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 05:01, February 4, 2015 (UTC)

The latter! This is a slight parody of the macabre 90-second "preventable injury" advertisement during the Super Bowl. Spıke Ѧ 05:10 4-Feb-15

edit A trophy as big as ... the writer I'm awarding it to

WOTY2014  Writer of the Year 2014    

Congratulations! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 14:28, February 8, 2015 (UTC)

Thanks again! It seems that the yearly awards, the monthly awards that we no longer want to be monthly, the Super Bowl, a new rash of annoying Wikia bugs, and the arrival of EStop, would fill a new issue of the UnSignpost. Did you gift that role to ScottPat or did he gift it back? If you are still too busy to paint that car, it is worth a ton of praise that you keep the engine running! Spıke Ѧ 14:35 8-Feb-15

edit Delete the main page

Please also delete: Hey admin, what anime?

I accidentally create that page, I suppose to work with it in my user sandbox but

Megalo Kirito (talk) 09:36, February 10, 2015 (UTC)

edit Vanilla

I read some of the rules, but "humor standard" I don't know at all,I read an article,but I didn't find any humor. before adding anything to the page. May you tell me some example of humor sentence of this article?SIsexual intercourse 13:04, February 14, 2015 (UTC)

I have a secret for you: Not everything on the website is of high quality. But this article is okay. The initial quotation is a little odd; the first paragraph plays it straight, which is okay, but then the article goes on to portray vanilla as a dangerous enemy of mankind. That's a comedy strategy. Another one is looking so serious that the substance can be absurd. You are welcome to try to improve it (the ending falls flat on me), but please don't add things that are obviously goofy, because that would spoil what creator Cap'n Ben was trying to do. Spıke Ѧ 13:24 14-Feb-15

edit How to welcome newbies

SPIKE! when I welcome newbies, I only copy other talk page content,am I correct?User:071058s[[2]] 02:09, February 18, 2015 (UTC)

Anton199 and Romartus also welcome new users and they have their own Welcome files, which differ substantially from mine. You are welcome to customize yours, provided you stress the same essentials, such as {{Writing funny stuff}} which provides useful links. If you copy mine exactly, you will copy the assertion that "I will watch your user page" and you had better watch their user page and be prepared to have a conversation with them. In other words, the form of your Welcome message does not matter so much as the essence of your communication to the new user.
The most important thing is to keep your temper in check, which you sometimes do not do when newbies make really crappy edits. If we drive them away, we can't ever teach them the right way to do it.
You should also not patrol beyond your understanding. You reverted an Anon who simply added [[pt:energia]] to Energy. That is simply an "interwiki link" to the corresponding article on the Portuguese Uncyclopedia. This link will make "Portugues" show up in the sidebar under Other languages. Spıke Ѧ 04:03 18-Feb-15

By the way, it makes no sense for you to welcome new users with a photograph of my avatar (which I don't even do in the current version). Please be creative; this is Uncyclopedia. Spıke Ѧ 13:19 18-Feb-15

edit Jeb Bush

I don't mind the reverts but perhaps I can suggest an * in the empty boxes with a reference below saying something on the lines 'to be filled in once they start campaigning'. I think just having an empty box gives the article an incomplete look. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 08:22, February 18, 2015 (UTC)

Okay, but I think it means we drop the whole theme of "to be filled in." Spıke Ѧ 13:09 18-Feb-15

edit I need professional help!

Dear SpikeA, you know how much I like you. You are my favorite person, you are my blood, I love you so so much, you know that. If the moment should come, I would die in horrible pain for you, without even questioning, not for one nanosecond. However, I need you to tell me how can I vote on things like "article of the week", "n00b of the month" and trivialities as such. I do not seem to find any useful links and we both know I should be able to find some links, considering is the best edited, most user-friendly website in the world. And considering my ultimate goal is to hack Uncyclopedia into the obscurity it deserves, it would be that much useful to me to know how to vote on stuff. Thanks! Prankusername (talk) 08:10, February 19, 2015 (UTC)

To the contrary, you have already found one of the voting pages and made a contribution I would call vandalism of a section heading. In view of your need to spew daily rants at persons in charge, the correct professional help involves the ban-stick. Spıke Ѧ 13:26 19-Feb-15

edit SIsexual intercourse

I knocked the ban down to two weeks but anymore nonsense from 'Sise' (like Socking or Vandalism) then a permanent ban can be considered. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 11:18, February 26, 2015 (UTC)

The point is that his promises to reform are immediately followed by more of the same. He does not contribute; every edit to a content page requires post-editing; every patrol of the wiki has to be reviewed, as two days running he has undone typo corrections by Anons; and every overture to new users is backed up by latent hostility. I have no confidence that he will develop. Spıke Ѧ 13:31 26-Feb-15
Seeing his last post, it's clear he's interested in participating but doesn't know how to do it correctly: I'm pretty sure he didn't mean any harm and was just unaware of the potential consequences of such an attitude. Generally speaking, I think SI just doesn't know what to do in order to help. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:41, February 26, 2015 (UTC)
The only other way is to impose UN:OFFICE conditions with a sentence time limit. This can specifically ban a user from getting involved in welcoming new users or other issues. I recall Zana Dark had this done to her a few times - as evident in the log. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 20:27, February 26, 2015 (UTC)

edit Hand of God

This is very odd....At the same time you added an ICU to Hand of God, I moved it into The Omniscience's userspace. Yet, instead of showing an edit conflict, there are now two articles: One in mainspace and one in userspace. Not quite sure why that would happen or whether or not to delete one of them. --Pwn head Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 21:27, March 4, 2015 (UTC)

I think I fixed it. --Pwn head Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 21:47, March 4, 2015 (UTC)
If that were the case, I would not get the Edit Conflict screen; instead, my edit would show up as the first edit of a new document. Userspacing vs. {{ICU}} doesn't matter to me, as long as the author gets some guidance. Spıke Ѧ 22:18 4-Mar-15
Ah I see now. Makes sense. I also see that the article is coming along quite nicely. --Pwn head Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 00:05, March 5, 2015 (UTC)

edit My userpage

Can you delete it? ~jcm 03:55, March 13, 2015 (UTC)

Done. Please use QVFD for such requests in the future. Spıke Ѧ 11:40 13-Mar-15

edit BUTT POOP!!!!

Thanks. Also, I know BUTT POOP is controversial, but can I at least redirect it to UnNews:Chrysler unrolls new line of 2009 Internet memes like originally intended? ~jcm 17:55, March 13, 2015 (UTC)

I will ban you if you delete another file without a vote by turning it into a redirect. Separately, please put something on your user page; otherwise, having a signature that makes it appear in blue does nothing but prank other Uncyclopedians. Spıke Ѧ 18:24 13-Mar-15
BUTT POOP!!!! is already deleted, but 150+ other pages link to it, so I figured simply reverting it to way it was before it was taken over by that Mike Tyson joke would be a good compromise. ~jcm 19:15, March 13, 2015 (UTC)
Only six two mainspace pages link to it, and two both of those are navelism pages (Worst reflections on the year). There are so many links because its deletion was controversial. Spıke Ѧ 19:24 13-Mar-15
Also, even though you might not like the Why page, I'm actually very proud of it. Can you restore it so I can move it to my userspace like my other unfinished articles? ~jcm 19:19, March 13, 2015 (UTC)
It is not that I don't like it; it is that it has no humor; just the one unfunny utterance done with stylistic variations. But it is restored at User:UPjcm/Why? for additional work. Spıke Ѧ 19:24 13-Mar-15

edit Stink-nose

How about I move it to "How to:Stink-nose"? Am I correct?User:071058s[[3]] 11:30, March 13, 2015 (UTC)

I have a better idea. Spıke Ѧ 11:40 13-Mar-15

edit User:Ihatejoshatwal‎

Looks like cyberbullying Spike. --EStop (talk) 04:59, March 17, 2015 (UTC)

Yup, one of three I saw added overnight (not necessarily by the same author). But posting at QVFD will get it deleted by the first Admin on duty. Spıke Ѧ 11:53 17-Mar-15

edit Nogophobia (VFD request)

A boring, feeble article that hasn’t been touched since 2009. It exists because the author found the concept per se absurd. I would have nominated it myself, but I’m not allowed to edit VFD. -- 21:05, March 19, 2015 (UTC)

Reviewed by former Admin MrN9000 and found not to be feeble. Just needs pix and perhaps twice the humor. If you are scrupulous of picking a user name, you can still improve the article. It would be nice if the page title were something real. Spıke Ѧ 21:17 19-Mar-15

edit user:Fartsalot56

It looks like his user page has gone but I can still access through the "What's Happening" link. Note his recent addition to Jat People above. Had I seen that earlier I wouldn't have bothered with talking on his page. EStop (talk) 09:57, March 21, 2015 (UTC)

I don't see evidence that he ever had a user page, just a talk page. Your comments there are correct, both on the poor quality of his edits, the importance of willingness to improve, and the ultimate outcome. On Jat People, you are welcome to just remove the addition, though I now have. On the other guy's new page, he is a repeat customer with no point except advertising, which I hope to minimize. Spıke Ѧ 10:05 21-Mar-15

edit Isntrael

Here’s an article prototype. You can tell me if it’s crap or not. I don’t know if making entries for fictional countries is O.K. In any case, maybe you could salvage something. -- 05:06, March 22, 2015 (UTC)

Indeed, an article whose title is a pun will prevent anyone from calling it up. Writing about fictional countries is not as good as writing funny stuff about countries that exist; that fits your article into the "encyclopedia" container we provide. It is not free-form but you can still tell the same jokes. Now, you want to fictionalize Israel, and I do not. So instead of inviting me to finish what you started, why don't you pick a user name and finish it yourself?
However, your start is pretty bad. In the first sentence, the first idea you offer is Your Mom's Asshole, which I guarantee was more fun for you to type than it will be for almost anyone to read. The geographical description of Isntrael (Isn't Real?) is overt nonsense that makes no point. At this point I become aware that you are not so much going to amuse me as just throw stuff at me. In 52 B.C.: An encyclopedia doesn't know what anyone thought, and has a better explanation for all events than that they would be "pretty cool." What follows is Wacky Nation (with an episode of Wacky War), but it doesn't matter because the reader has clicked away, and doesn't even get to Transportation, where your only joke is nonsense numbers.
What you must do is decide exactly what about Israel you would like to ridicule and how you are going to go about it but seem serious. Does the "writer" misunderstand something? Does he have good things to say about something that is actually awful (irony)? Have a plan before you start; make every bit of your article amuse but also hang together around that plan. Good luck! Spıke Ѧ 12:01 22-Mar-15
I’m not expecting anybody to improve it, I just desired honest (if hurtful) feedback. The reason I’m not fabricating an account is because I rarely ever touch this site, and will most probably continue to do so. Some people think that I’m funny, but I don’t see myself as an excellent writer. Most of my writing tends to be nonfictional and dry.
Isntrael is just made‐up nonsense, that has little to do with the actual country. You could replace it with anything else.
Anyway, thanks for the feedback; I hope that it wasn’t too painful to read my crap. I don’t know if I can dedicate myself long enough to make an account here, so I’d prefer to remain anonymous. -- 14:50, March 22, 2015 (UTC)
Picking a user name has never gotten me marketing spam from our webhost and in fact enhances your privacy. You might find a few people here who would help you get funnier. But you might also find ridicule (which might lead to experience accepting criticism that your tone above suggests you could also benefit from). Your choice. Spıke Ѧ 15:55 22-Mar-15

edit Uncyclopedia:Ban Policy

I added our policy on ban evasion to the list. Please review & update if you think it needs changing. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 16:48, March 25, 2015 (UTC)

Thanks; I added a proposed overview intended to show the thought process behind the Pretty Table; your move. Spıke Ѧ 17:45 25-Mar-15
Most of it I agree with in the overview except this: Unwillingness to learn from explanation on the user talk page means a ban may be expedient to show the user that he must follow the explanation. This seems too vague, & is the source of many of your bans that I have reversed in the past. Especially since we have the ban evasion rule that a user cannot discuss on talk pages during the ban. I can understand listening to warnings being required, but when the explanation is not a warning, it would seem to fall under creative differences. Perhaps we should add a section for page recreation as well? -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 18:02, March 25, 2015 (UTC)
I am all ears, edit away. However, most of my recreation here is in pages, so a hyphen would be helpful. Spıke Ѧ 18:09 25-Mar-15

edit Should I do an article on "Greeny Phatom"?

Okay, so there's this really bad MS Paint show on YouTube called "Greeny Phatom", and it claims to be made by all these fuckin' companies and it's absolute trash. So, what I was thinking was that I could make an article for Uncyclopedia making fun of it and stuff. I'm just worried that It's going to get deleted by someone who does not know it's an actual web series. The preceding unsigned comment was added by Coles3rdaccount (talk • contribs)

You probably shouldn't make an article on a YouTube series. It is virtually impossible to tell that these are not efforts to draw traffic to the other site or even overt self-promotion. My general recommendation is to use this site to write creative new comedy and not to document funny stuff done elsewhere, especially stuff that is "funny" only in that you think it is stupid. Spıke Ѧ 03:50 29-Mar-15

edit Userpage

Hey, as I was not able to sign up with the username I originally wanted, would it be acceptable to keep a mainstream format for all Wikia sites and make redirects to the User:JustAnIng namespace from my profile? I would frankly prefer this, so that I can be under one username across all of Wikia, but if it is going to interfere with RecentChanges or something else, then I understand.

Coonstar 2001 (talk) 01:58, March 30, 2015 (UTC)

We explicitly permit you to use your userpage to publish other ways to contact you. The Abuse Filter you encountered is a warning not to turn our content pages into ads for other sites, though; and for that reason, we don't permit such links in your signature. For more about this and customizing your signature, see UN:SIG. By the way, I think it was your original request that got me to inquire at Wikia about whether we could drop our old demand to have a separate user namespace. There is no remaining objection here, but Wikia noted that such a change would force some Uncyclopedians to change their user names, and we dropped it. Spıke Ѧ 02:29 30-Mar-15

edit One Direction

Hello, Spike. I was just wondering what you think I could do better in terms of the Jeremy Clarkson addition. There's been a lot of talk about what would happen if Clarkson did join one direction, so I wondered how I can make it funnier without...HIV, Ebola and Blowjobs, as you put it. Lord Castabarus (talk) 20:13, March 30, 2015 (UTC)

Thanks for asking. It struck me as very non-encyclopedic, almost written in the style of a news release in our UnNews department: specific to current events that will soon become non-current. As I mentioned in the change summary, the repeat use of "it was announced" set me off, for reasons I explain at A simple style is most encyclopedic. (Announced by whom?) That so-and-so has HIV, has Ebola, has become a prostitute, are cut-downs that kids exchange at the playground. Comedy ought to have something holding it together independent of the facts, and yet be guided by the facts so that it relates to something real. This is explained in detail at How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid. If nothing comes to mind, make fun of yourself: A clueless article writer for Uncyclopedia reads the speculation about Clarkson in Variety and gets it all wrong. Surely he must already have joined, and they are just denying it? What are real aspects of Clarkson that the clueless writer would think would fit well with One Direction (though the reader can see that they actually won't)? Good luck! Spıke Ѧ 20:16 30-Mar-15

Thanks. The reason I use that sort of humour is because I hear it everyday in the playground. I'm actually reading a real Wikipedia article on Clarkson's dismissal from Top Gear. I think it's important I mirror that but change the content. Relating to real facts, but twist them. I also made a mistake in giving dates as opposed to the year of the event, which, as you said, this event will soon become part of history. I'm going to re-draft the section now. It's sad that I can't think of anything good, because, as a fan fiction writer, I should be jumping with ideas. Is it alright if I post my re-draft here for evaluation by you? Thanks again. Lord Castabarus (talk) 16:14, March 31, 2015 (UTC)

You can type it right into the article and I will take your explanation into account if I review it. However, if you are reading "a real Wikipedia article" in Wikinews, again, our analog to Wikinews is UnNews; the encyclopedia should not parody news events but incorporate everything into a stable long-term view. Spıke Ѧ 16:21 31-Mar-15

edit Gratitude

Many thanks aas always for the continued support good Shepherd Spike of Uncyclopedia. I'm rather rusty. GUN   SIR  MAC  BOSWELL  Knightssword   [†]  13:50, March 31, 2015 (UTC)

If you mean my edits to, and VFH comment on, Magazine, surely you are aware that we proudly allow (your further) editing of things even while they are "up for a vote"? Spıke Ѧ 14:03 31-Mar-15

Must admit, it's been a tricky one for me this one, probably because it's the first in a long time, plus it's something I had no interest in doing other than to 'clear up' some of the articles that need doing (no point shying away from them). I'll look at expanding on some of your recommendations ASAP. Your editing is always appreciated sir.) GUN   SIR  MAC  BOSWELL  Knightssword   [†]  14:39, March 31, 2015 (UTC)

Welcome back Macboswell. Clearing up existing articles is a necessary chore sometimes...hopefully can lead to comedic gold later. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 17:47, March 31, 2015 (UTC)
Personal tools