User talk:Romartus

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How disputes are settled here.

edit Page rape

I see you were having fun while I slept! When encountering a vandal like our overnight visitor, the best way is to use Rollback All. This undoes all his edits in a single click. (After reviewing a half dozen of them, it is safe to assume the rest are in character.) It also patrols his edits, and marks your rollbacks and the original edits as 'bot edits so that they cease to appear in Special:RecentChanges under normal settings. I then go up to the URL line and change Contributions to Nuke to deal with newly created pages.

If the vandal visited to get attention, the above method minimizes the attention he will get. It comes as close as you can on a wiki to making it seem as though he were never here at all. Spıke ¬ 12:51 29-Jul-14

Ah that would have been easier but for some reason the vandal had stopped before I got to his edits. I know it is our 'old friend' but since he has an issue about Roman Dog Bird, isn't he on the wrong wiki? --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 13:00, July 29, 2014 (UTC)

edit Main page rape

Hi Romartus! Do you know what the problem with the main page is? There is no featured article in the Today's Feature Article section. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 09:29, August 5, 2014 (UTC)

Hi Anton. Hmmm. That is odd. I was going to change the page tonight. See what happens then. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 12:27, August 5, 2014 (UTC)

edit Knights

Sir Crap Alot has been deleted via VFD and I've removed it from the template.

Knights Knights
Knights in White SatinKnights TemplarKnights who say NiTeutonic KnightsRed Hot Pawn
Sir HamsterlotSir LancelotSir SwagsalotSri LankaSean Connery

Cheers to you for working on Sir Lancelot. However, I used to enjoy the fact that this template contained a gaggle of Lancelot knock-offs, whereas Lancelot himself used to be a red-link. Spıke ¬ 18:27 7-Aug-14

edit Mary Tyler Moore Response

I removed the bold text and added categories.


Thank you. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 06:49, August 8, 2014 (UTC)

edit Wannabe Janitor Joining

Hi, you must be one of the admin, me and my friend (who will be joining soon) want to help clean up the wiki and we were very interested in VFD, but I am banned from editing. What do I do first? There are a lot of votes me and my buddy would like to cast. THUNDERPUNCHERS (talk) 06:47, August 9, 2014 (UTC)

And I am the guy he was talking about. We are a team in this together, I read that you have to wait a number of days. How many exactly? ActualTrash (talk) 07:13, August 9, 2014 (UTC)
l think it is about three days from the creation of an account. Regards articles in the deletion process, all users are encouraged to see if something can be done to improve it first. Deleting an article is the last resort.--LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 07:56, August 9, 2014 (UTC)

edit Daily Mail

Please patrol/revert/post-edit yesterday's edit to this article. It seems more ranty than funny to me. Spıke ¬ 10:54 12-Aug-14

Ok. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 14:02, August 12, 2014 (UTC)
I have given it an edit. The additional stuff was ok but the article could do with a bit of reshaping in my view. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 14:14, August 12, 2014 (UTC)

I am not the one to do that. But I tweaked the article on Coca-Cola, for which I had to look up Lord Coke. He might be worth Uncyclopedia treatment. Spıke ¬ 16:54 12-Aug-14

You do realise that you're talking about two articles that I've worked on previously. Seriously, I turn away for 5 seconds and you just take over everything...
Coke was designed to be more of a take on advertising and its impact on independent writing. There were actually two "versions" of this - one "original" that was pure rhetoric from Killer Cola, and the "sponsored" that was taking everything that was said in the previous article and turning it on it's head. One day I may even get back to working on that.
Speaking of work - I think stuff has been done. Might be worth double checking in case I've missed any.                               Puppy's talk page03:35 pm 14 Aug 2014
Concerning images, there are still all those that have been attacked on the first of April. For the full list, see Colin's last contributions. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 15:42, August 14, 2014 (UTC)
Pup can check these when he re-emerges later today. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 16:46, August 14, 2014 (UTC)
Think that got them all.                               Puppy's talk page04:15 am 17 Aug 2014
Thanks Pup :) --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 10:07, August 17, 2014 (UTC)

edit HowTo:Repair a broken smartphone on VFH

Hi Romartus! Thank you for your vote! However, this article has changed significantly since the opening of the nomination. I'm informing you just in case this might change your vote, but I hope it won't! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:53, August 13, 2014 (UTC)

Since I liked it before, I can't imagine it has become worse - so my vote remains cast in favour. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 16:47, August 14, 2014 (UTC)
Thanks! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 16:48, August 14, 2014 (UTC)

edit Uncyclopedia's Wikia Portal

Could you, please, give a link to Uncyclopedia's entry on the Wikia site? I cannot find it. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 12:43, August 15, 2014 (UTC)

It's not necessarily anywhere yet. If you can find the portals to other wikis and if there is none for Uncyclopedia, that means There Isn't Any. Wikia proposed this and asked the Admins for suggested wording, and we opened the debate up to the users. Spıke ¬ 12:58 15-Aug-14
I think the consensus was it was fine, if a touch too prescriptive. I am sure we could tweak it a tad but otherwise, I am happy for that to go up as our promo page. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 13:59, August 15, 2014 (UTC)

edit UnNews:Scottish campaigners request Australian help

Could you add this to Template:RecentUnNews as Spike's not around (Spike protected it from vandal threat so only admins can add)? Thanks. Please read and edit if you wish as well. Sir ScottPat (converse) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 11:18, August 17, 2014 (UTC)

I was on holiday yesterday (Massachusetts sales-tax holiday). (A total waste of time; there is nothing aching to be bought that doesn't come with a two-year contract.) And am at the stadium today. Perhaps I don't understand the underlying news, but it begins with idle claims of being "racist and sexist" such as are tossed around every day in serious politics. (Reread CoW#Extremists.) Whether or not you believe these charges, I instantly tightened up and read the rest of it expecting persuasion rather than humor; and found the article mostly a somewhat jaunty expression of your own opinions. (Okay, or else someone else's opinion portrayed as the author's.) Needs work. Spıke ¬ 11:37 17-Aug-14
People have accused him of being sexist and racist and many people over here are confused as why you would get a controversial politician to back your point of view so it is a public held opinion and one questioning the intelligence of the Better Together campaign. The rest is my usual humour, of course with views and opinions but generally attacking everybody involved in the news story and ridiculing an important event as UnNews is supposed to do. I don't see how the article isn't appropriate for UnNews recent template. I would encourage Romartus to check the article out as well and voice his opinion. Thanks. Sir ScottPat (converse) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 12:31, August 17, 2014 (UTC)
Installed; but still needs work. You are talking around me; lots of politicians are called racist and sexist (and worse yet, "controversial") by adversaries, and of course I don't want to debate the truth of these charges (and they are not made true by the fact that they are "publicly held" — that is, that someone in the political theater claims to believe them) but why your UnNews starts with polemics rather than comedy. Spıke ¬ 12:41 17-Aug-14
But the comedy is the fact that the Better Together Campaign which is seen to have an easy debate (unlike Salmond who is seen to be dreaming the impossible) calls in the Australian equivalent of George Bush (and yes in the UK and Australia at least he is known as being a pretty dumb guy) to debate for them denting their credibility in the eyes of the public. This isn't just any politician off the street - he has a reputation for it. I'm in no way trying to mock the PM himself. Sir ScottPat (converse) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 12:50, August 17, 2014 (UTC)
Then would you please re-focus this to emphasize the comedy, and not just add another citation that proves that someone other than you calls him a sexist? I don't care whom you are trying to mock, but it comes off as though you are trying to do something, and not amuse the reader. Spıke ¬ 12:59 17-Aug-14
It does read more like a comment on a news story rather than a news story in its own right. The approach would work in an article about Salmond or the Better Together campaign in my view. I think a rapier is more effective than a sledge hammer. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 14:29, August 17, 2014 (UTC)
Thank you Romartus. I'll see what I can do. Spike I can ensure you I wasn't trying to do anything but amuse and was asking for advice on how to show that. Sir ScottPat (converse) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 14:31, August 17, 2014 (UTC)
No problem ScottPat. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 14:34, August 17, 2014 (UTC)

edit Ferguson, Missouri

I want to do an UnNews on this too! as I think the funniest part is the spin in the media. Preparing to feature it side-by-side with yours tonight.

Please follow house style in the dateline: only capitalize the first part of the place name, and start the first paragraph on the same line. Spıke ¬ 14:04 18-Aug-14

Ok done. I seem to be 'locked' in a different style of formatting the page. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 14:10, August 18, 2014 (UTC)

edit File:Greggs logo.png

On the revert war at this image, I take the side of the newbie. We should supply any "humor" with a caption, not by modifying the corporate logo, because

  1. Authors should not rely on text in images for humor, but should write their own, a guideline I recently added to UN:IMAGE; and
  2. It angers corporations more for us to abuse their trademarks than it amuses anyone. See Fisher-Price. Spıke ¬ 12:23 19-Aug-14
I understand as regards Fisher-Price example. The original joke isn't that good but seemed a bit bland to replace that with the current version of the logo. I changed the Tesco logo for one story to 'Every Little Pony Helps' as a direct parody of their own campaign+the then horsemeat story at the time. I think make jokes about a company logo is fine. I will leave the Greggs one as I wasn't bothered either way. It just seemed odd that a newbie would go for that to change. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 13:08, August 19, 2014 (UTC)
Out of interest see this external link. I am name checked for the image, whereas the original author English peasant isn't! --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 07:46, August 20, 2014 (UTC)

edit Gravity

Okay. It was just a joking reference to Tarantino's little fetish. PS: Thanks for uploading the Gregg's logo. Hilarious. :) --Lucifuge Rofacale (talk) 10:27, August 20, 2014 (UTC)

If you check the last link on the Village Dump forum as regards Greggs, you will see how the story developed. Sky credited me with the logo but it was originally put there by English peasant four years ago. A Google bot did the rest. Doughnuts or donuts...--LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 10:30, August 20, 2014 (UTC)

edit UnNews:"Dingo ate my baby" dad finally sells death car‎

My article in the #1 spot on the Front Page is filler until something better comes along (#2 through #5 are side-by-sides), but this new UnNews is more offbeat than funny, is not based on newsy news, and seems written mostly to advertise an Uncyclopedia article, so I'll pass on it. My new UnNews:US won't reveal text of Obama-care is too ranty to use too. Spıke ¬ 13:04 20-Aug-14

This was kind of big news in this part of the world and we even heard about it here in NZ. I saw the mention of a different James Cameron in the source story and couldn't pass up giving it the movie slant. Thank-you Spike for the "top billing" position. Captain gull (talk) 22:05, August 21, 2014 (UTC)

edit RE: Request

Thanks for the response. I would like to delete this account. Starpluck (talk) 13:26, August 20, 2014 (UTC)

You go here: --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 13:30, August 20, 2014 (UTC)

Can I at least kindly get a name change to Felixed69 right before I do? Please? Starpluck (talk) 13:41, August 20, 2014 (UTC)

No. Close the old account first. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 13:43, August 20, 2014 (UTC)
You already applied for a name change — to something else — at User talk:Sannse, where we normally send such requests (incidentally blanking the page). At this point you seem to be simply wasting people's time. If you want to go away, just go away. Spıke ¬ 13:45 20-Aug-14

edit User Stephen100000

I have permabanned him and removed your overture to him. See the "contributions" of Stephen10000. On his VFD nominee, United Socialist States of America, previous editor was Stephenkollenborn1000. This guy, under 3 IDs, has done nothing but hack up this article and then try to VFD it. Spıke ¬ 11:55 21-Aug-14

Ahh. That's fine. I hadn't realised he had a previous record. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 12:08, August 21, 2014 (UTC)

edit File:UnNewsNAVEL-GAZING.png


Can you do that in the same font (Impact) as the others? Can you specify a transparent background? Spıke ¬ 18:18 21-Aug-14

Concerning UnNews, I've just noticed an external link on our main page in the rigt column dedicated to UnNews, just below the list of all the recent UnNews articles. It's a link to a website, called freewebs (its subdomain to be more precise: [1]), and when you click on it, it says that the website is frozen. Is Wikia supoosed its owner? And what is supposed to be on this website? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 18:36, August 21, 2014 (UTC)

Found and removed. It looks like someone else didn't pay their hosting fees.... Spıke ¬ 19:04 21-Aug-14
PS--Oh, "freewebs" — I guess something else went wrong. I don't know what this used to do. With Romartus's permission, I scrubbed the UnNews Front Page itself perhaps six months ago and pulled out a bunch of links that no longer did anything. Spıke ¬ 19:05 21-Aug-14
I will have to do that tomorrow as regards the logos. Sorry. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 21:18, August 21, 2014 (UTC)
OK. Our Navelism articles are in the 2- and 3-spots; I put Dingo in the #1 spot with a different logo, and you can see the contrast, even if you don't specify blue heather as your Uncyclopedia background as I do. The #3 spot looks ratty because File:Mark Zuckerberg.jpg (now a Facebook logo) was done with excess blank space at top and bottom; you might be able to crop it. Speaking of upload-a-new-version, Sannse has been back with another test, evidently surprising herself with the results. Spıke ¬ 21:28 21-Aug-14
As you can see, I got something done with IrfanView. The degree of stickiness of each of its options is baffling, I do not know how to move a selection in the image, and it really doesn't support transparency as a fourth color dimension (so at the edge of the letters you will always get a little of whatever color my canvas was), but it may be good enough for our purposes; if not, dig in. Spıke ¬ 22:14 21-Aug-14

edit Please unprotect my user and talk pages

Hi, about a year ago you so kindly protected my user and talk pages so that no harm could come to them after I had been dragged away to Neverland and imprisoned in the bottom of a sunk ship. Now I have found my way back and I would like to have access to my things again. See, I've even archived my talk page; you don't have to worry yourself about those annoying little tricks I used to get up to. Sound alright? -– Llwy-ar-lawr (Shyriiwook?) 15:20, August 22, 2014 (UTC)

Unlocked. You are free to wander around. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 15:26, August 22, 2014 (UTC)
Thanks! -– Llwy-ar-lawr (Shyriiwook?) 15:37, August 22, 2014 (UTC)
Noone forced you to leave this website, you left because of disagreements with users here, as I did. "Dragged away to the bottom of a sunk ship"? I find the ease at which you have returned to this website which you had nothing but hate for a few weeks ago, your subsequent brown nosing of the users here and the fact you now seem to relish attacking the other site now quite distateful. I was hoping you would return to the other site, but seeing this, I'm not so sure. Banzaikitten (talk) 16:21, August 22, 2014 (UTC)
An apology to Romartus, I thought this was on llwy's talk page. I have left enough rants on Romartus talkpages in the past. Banzaikitten (talk) 16:23, August 22, 2014 (UTC)
I see a lot of 'drama stoking'. Can we all just chuck buckets of water over each other??--LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 16:26, August 22, 2014 (UTC)
Ice water or boiling water? Banzaikitten (talk) 16:34, August 22, 2014 (UTC)
Take the cabbage and potatoes out first. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 16:39, August 22, 2014 (UTC)

edit Correction

Hey Romartus. I don't think you made the correction on the forum page about the bakery logo, mind if I do? Ta -- sannse@Wikia (talk) 15:53, August 26, 2014 (UTC)

Yes, go ahead please. Thanks. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 19:38, August 26, 2014 (UTC)

edit PLS in 2015 2014

Thanks for putting this in the site banner! Do you agree with the date? Another question: would you like to host it yourself as usually? You can rely on my help in the organization and judging (if I'll be able to edit Uncyclopedia).

I will also adapt the planner into an actual "official" page that everyone else may comprehend and which can be linked in the same banner so that users can start signing up for competitons! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 22:24, August 26, 2014 (UTC)

PLS in 2015? I am thinking you are wanting one in 2014 (this year). I can host it and act as one of the judges again. Need a reasonable quota of writers to participate. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 07:03, August 27, 2014 (UTC)
Whoops, I forgot that the year ends in December! Yes, about the writers, but I think this banner will notify them. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 09:03, August 27, 2014 (UTC)
By the way, is Wikia planning to give out money for it, as it announced last summer? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 11:50, August 27, 2014 (UTC)
Ah, yes. That was the proposal in 2013. Details needed to be worked out how to do this. I will come back before we officially start anything on PLS. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 19:24, August 27, 2014 (UTC)
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