User talk:RAHB

Talk Archive 1 (2/28/07 - 7/6/07)
Talk Archive 2 (7/6/07 - 9/8/07)
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Talk Archive 4 (12/8/07 - 5/18/08)
Talk Archive 5 (5/18/08 - 7/12/08)
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Talk Archive 14 (8/26/10 - 8/13/11)
Talk Archive 15 (8/13/11 - 1/30/12)
Talk Archive 16 (1/30/12 - 7/12/12)

Cock!

And hello to you, my kind sir! -- Sir CPT Dr PuppyOnTheRadio GUN UmP WotM NotM FP VFP VFH CM POTM UGM 04:40 13 Jul 04:40, July 13, 2012 (UTC)

Having said that, what do you think of the work that IP has done on Keytar so far? I can't work out if I like it or not, so figured I'd dump the problem on someone else. There is some decent effort going into it though, so I'd like to encourage this one to hang around. -- Sir CPT Dr PuppyOnTheRadio GUN UmP WotM NotM FP VFP VFH CM POTM UGM 04:46 13 Jul 04:46, July 13, 2012 (UTC)

Yeah, I was thinking the same. It seems to have an idea of the proper wiki formatting and some of the jokes are pretty good, but it mostly seems to be one-liners and doesn't really fit for a wiki just yet. I wasn't sure which ICU tag would actually make sense for that. Maybe I should just put a construction tag on it instead. If it's still there after a week we can urge him to join and move it to his userspace. -RAHB 04:50, July 13, 2012 (UTC)

Aaaaand it turns out he removed my ICU anyway. Still went ahead with the construction tag though. -RAHB 04:53, July 13, 2012 (UTC)

That's probably just lack of understanding of wiki courtesy. I threw an {{IPjoin}} at him, but hasn't penetrated through. He's still working on it though, so he may have removed it due to confused edit conflict. -- Sir CPT Dr PuppyOnTheRadio GUN UmP WotM NotM FP VFP VFH CM POTM UGM 04:56 13 Jul 04:56, July 13, 2012 (UTC)

Yeah, usually that sort of thing is just a case of not knowing what the hell an "ICU" is and how it showed up on a page. I'll give him the benefit of the doubt on that. -RAHB 05:04, July 13, 2012 (UTC)

Boners!

~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) 05:09, July 13, 2012 (UTC)

Aaaaand...guess what?

I got syphilis! Hahaha, no, although that hooker we shared was purty skanky. (I'd advise a checkup at the free clinic, ask for Dr. Karemidian. Dude has just the most awesome overgrowth of Armenian eyebrows.) Anyhoo, what I meant to say was, I got a new ISP! Hurrah! Now we can be together. Forever. And ever. And ever.  ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Sun, Jul 15 '12 8:22 (UTC)

There's something creepy about pre-pubescent twin girls standing in hotel hallways saying play with us. Sir CPT Dr PuppyOnTheRadio GUN UmP WotM NotM FP VFP VFH CM POTM UGM 08:36 15 Jul

Hadn't noticed. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Sun, Jul 15 '12 8:39 (UTC)

Neither had I. That was from The Sound Of Music or something, right? -RAHB 21:25, July 15, 2012 (UTC)

Hi!

Me again. Any chance you would want this or this? (My caption for the second one would be: "In recent years, Nazi eaters wishing for privacy during their meal have taken to covering their heads with large napkins, a tradition originally associated with the consumption of ortolan buntings." Too pretentious?) ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Mon, Jul 16 '12 16:53 (UTC)

Ahahahaha. I wouldn't have thought it needed either, but that caption would fit perfectly with the article, so I'll use the second one. Many a thank, sir. Many a thank. -RAHB 01:28, July 17, 2012 (UTC)

Actually, the first one is also way better than the logo already in the article (which was even worse before I applied a terrible effect to it), so I'll switch that out too. Winnings! -RAHB 01:29, July 17, 2012 (UTC)

Also, again, another indent, is the second one yours? Which I ask because I don't want to just go grab it and upload it all willy nilly without attributing it properly. -RAHB 01:34, July 17, 2012 (UTC)

Any news channel

What's the guideline for what would normally be a QVFD with a construction tag? Can I still QVFD, or change it to an ICU, or what? Sir CPT Dr PuppyOnTheRadio GUN UmP WotM NotM FP VFP VFH CM POTM UGM 05:28 17 Jul

That quote on there sounds like something they'd put in a remake of Network, should the movie industry ever commit such a tragedy. Usually QVFD and auto-delete are for one-liners, but this doesn't seem to be much more than a one-liner. I'll err on the side of not deleting it at the moment and just say tag it with ICU. Mainly because I have no idea what the author is trying to accomplish so I can't tell whether he's failed or not yet :/ -RAHB 05:35, July 17, 2012 (UTC)

Yeah. The history is a bunch of copy-pasta, so I doubt the originality here, but I've ICU'd it. I doubt it'll grow, but it might suit an Undictionary entry. Sir CPT Dr PuppyOnTheRadio GUN UmP WotM NotM FP VFP VFH CM POTM UGM 10:30 17 Jul

We've got boner for news! It's the UnSignpost!

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

The Free Newspaper Only Two People Started Out Editing, But Now They Want Nothing To Do With!

July 19th, 2012 • Issue 170 • Got Wood?

Fancy a Bone? By Chief Everybody loves horrendous drawings of genitals! "The latest meme is Template:Boner." Qzekrom blared into the press room last Thursday. We here in the UnSignpost office were absolutely beside ourselves, if we wanted people to tell us the news we'd open a hotline, a suggestion precluded by our lack of a phone, money or staff. So it came down to a straight choice between considering the reaction and the effect of the new MediaWiki Upgrade and the featuring of a template whose entirety is a very poor drawing of a penis. Naturally, we chose the one that included the smallest amount of penis: Template:Boner. This template is apparently the best thing since sliced bread, and you can use it in practically the same ways; you can spread it with butter and serve it to your friends as a surprise, you can dunk it into egg and, most importantly, consume it with jam. The template stormed to feature status with 23 votes for, which, coincidentally is the same number of votes cast on VFH throughout the whole of March. Nothing it seems mobilises Uncyclopedians better than a penis. The size of the penis in the template may account somewhat for its popularity*. Qzekrom does have a point, and a worrying obsession with css and javascript and all those uninteresting things whose only real function is to produce unnecessary work like page editing and the graphical interface. If you share these interests then you can easily head to one of the many forums he has created to discuss them, if on the other hand you are short on time because of the job you have to go to and be miserable at for fifty hours a week then you can always go to VFH and vote one of of the many penis related articles that Uncyclopedia has to offer. The UnSignpost Dog loves a bone The VFH vote is being called "The third most rigged VFH in the history of Uncyclopedia", losing out to some votes that were actually rigged one must assume. Anybody wishing to rig their own vote has only to head onto IRC and start asking if anybody is "up for lulz" today and then simply pitching their idea as "This great thing I found". If you are struggling then feel free to ask Frosty who is the mastermind behind the present craze for boners. Not that anybody is particularly surprised. Have a bonerific week! *Readers are invited to interpret this statement however they like. A Song of Ice and Fire By Scofield Isn't that the story of the human heart? The fight between fear and passion, between kindness and meanness, between pwn3d and pwnz0r? It's always two forces, at constant war with one another, until the heart stops beating. But then again, it is but one heart amongst many, and so the war goes on for years and years, with ice winning and then losing, and then fire winning, and then losing. And the efforts of the great men who built this wonderful civilization before us have always striven to achieve the balance between these ubiquitous opposites. For ice shall freeze us, and fire shall burn us, but the middle component, the in-between, nourishes us. And the in-between component I speak of, is water. We always speak of following the middle path, of moderation, of not going to extremes. Well, water is the epitome of moderation! How queer is it, that if you heat a bucket of ice over fire you get water, but only if the ice is heated IN MODERATION! Indeed, water has always given us the best of both worlds! When ice was melted by the fire from the sun, the resultant water ended up becoming the very medium in which the first living organisms thrived! Is it a coincidence that even after all these years of evolution and extinction, 70% of the body weight of man is still water? Is it a coincidence that no living being (except for dormant-ass seedlings) can survive for long without a regular hit of H2O to keep it alive? I think not. Water is always straddling the middle path between ice and fire. Unlike ice, we can swallow it without it clogging our windpipe, and unlike fire, it won't burn our dear skin if we touch it. And water always nourishes us, keeps us alive and well! We all rose from the water, and to the water returns all our piss and shit! People have always wondered, what is the middle path? What is the balance we all seek? I say, the balance is water. The middle path is water! The answer to all conflicts and dilemmas that plague our life- is WATER!

Check out these pages! A serious problem It's boring Vote and so on I prefer: HURGLAAAAAAAAAAAAAB Are you? From our logs: 21:47, July 17, 2012 Romartus (talk | contribs) blocked Uncyclopediasucks69 (talk | contribs) with an expiry time of infinite (Unacceptable username) 06:51, July 17, 2012 Electrified mocha chinchilla (talk | contribs) blocked 71.179.95.227 (talk) with an expiry time of 6 months (Penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis.) 01:03, July 6, 2012 Xamralco (talk | contribs) blocked Abrabudallah (talk | contribs) with an expiry time of infinite (YOU HURT ABUSE FILTER'S FEELINGS) 08:43, July 10, 2012 ChiefjusticeDS (talk | contribs) blocked 99.103.84.134 (talk) with an expiry time of 3 Days (Blanker. Now, because of you, a block that could have been used on a starving African child is being wasted. For shame.) 19:30, July 9, 2012 Thekillerfroggy (talk | contribs) blocked 71.245.83.21 (talk) with an expiry time of 2 weeks (thou shalt not tarnish the dead's pregnancy fetish stash) 00:16, July 11, 2012 Xamralco (talk | contribs) blocked Thekillerfroggy (talk | contribs) with an expiry time of infinite (He's a frog lol ;)) Biopic of the Week Not many people get a biopic in the UnSignpost. Actually that's a lie, everybody does, though we maintain the hilarious façade that we can't biopic everybody because of the long queue of people we have awaiting a biopic. In reality the main cause for the lack of a biopic are the crippling inadequacies of the UnSignpost staff. After that tremendously complimentary opening Saberwolf116 is onto biopic number two. The older of you may remember Saberwolf from before his year and a half hiatus, pee reviewer, article voter and an all round splendid fellow, otherwise known as a poopsmith. To be serious for a moment (brace yourselves) while he probably doesn't know it he has been an inspiration to many of his fellow Uncyclopedians, on Pee Review and beyond. He has showed, by example, how to apply oneself to a task and how to function well within this community. He is a model Uncyclopedian and you should do your utmost follow his example, except for the parts where he screws things up and causes everybody to hate him. Saberwolf116 everybody, I hear his penis is very impressive. Old-school FA Sock Puppetry, or the assumption of multiple online personalities, is a growing phenomenon in anonymous online communities such as public blogs, commentable news-info sites, and "wikis." The more popular and extensive Wikis (such as Wikipedia, Uncyclopedia, and Memory Alpha) present an unusually fertile ground for various forms of sock puppetry, since the community interactions within a wiki site are vastly more complex than in other anonymous online communities. Newsroom UnTune of the week Uncyclopedia Didn't Start The Fire

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--ChiefjusticePS2 16:54, July 19, 2012 (UTC)

Please check QVFD

Can you also put {{QVFD checked}} above everything you reviewed? --QZEKЯOM Proud sponsor of Team Zombiebaron Tw$*ty Tw%#ve G*me$ FTW! Let's go for the g^@d! 23:10, July 21, 2012 (UTC)

Typically that isn't used very heavily, but if it makes things easier then sure. -RAHB 23:26, July 21, 2012 (UTC)

Change over

My dearest Mr. Rahb. Could you please change the site notice to

Retro Week has begun. Check out Uncyclopedia's most Belovedest Articles.

(or something like that). And could you please put the article AAAAAAAAA! for today (as of one minute ago)? (we agreed that the features would be the last 10 days of the month...so the bear article would have to wait until the 1st of August).

Thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanks. --ShabiDOO 23:59, July 21, 2012 (UTC)

Yeah, I noticed that. The bear article was already featured when I went to feature the first article, but I think I can edit some things around to make it feature in August instead. Working on it at the moment :/ -RAHB 00:07, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

Okay, I think I got it. I just have to remember to check something on the 1st... -RAHB 00:20, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

Yeah...thats perfect RAHB...thanks.

I don't know if you are able to do it...but do you think you could change the text of this:

So that it says:

Today's Special Retro Week Article:

? Hopefuly to gain a little more interest from visitors. Or is that difficult or impossible to do?

Thanks agian. --ShabiDOO 01:02, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

I've seen it done before with the Top Tens and stuff. Give me a few minutes and I'll see what I can do. Should be a quick edit to a template somewhere or something. -RAHB 01:07, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

Okay, got it. -RAHB 01:11, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

Rock and Roll.--ShabiDOO 01:14, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

I'm drunk

Big hairy dicks :D (just like old times) --MasterWangs CUNT and proud of it! 07:19, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

What a coincidence. I'm in the process of getting drunk. A big hairy wang to you as well sir! -RAHB 07:21, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

You know, IRC is totally the place to go when you're drunk. I don't actually know why, but like, every Uncyclopedian totally goes to the IRC when they're drunk. It's almost a rule. -RAHB 07:22, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

I'm terribly sober, and thanks. Sir CPT Dr PuppyOnTheRadio GUN UmP WotM NotM FP VFP VFH CM POTM UGM 07:24 22 Jul

"Terribly" is of course the operative term. And no problem. That's what I have all these buttons for I guess. -RAHB 07:26, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

I would but my uni is g-lined from freenode. --MasterWangs CUNT and proud of it! 07:30, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

Wow. I mean, that blows donkey dongs, but at the same time, congratulations for accomplishing a global ban. That's like, almost trophee-like. Of course, you could always use a proxy or something, right? -RAHB 07:38, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

Oh I didn't get the ban put in, it's been there since I started here. And proxies are either slow, blocked or cost money (which I don't have) --MasterWangs CUNT and proud of it! 07:42, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

IRC is fairly data-lite, so proxy shouldn't be too painful. Of course, I prefer twitter when drunk. More boobs. Sir CPT Dr PuppyOnTheRadio GUN UmP WotM NotM FP VFP VFH CM POTM UGM 07:44 22 Jul

Twitter has drunk boobs? Awesome. -RAHB 07:45, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

Tweeted that line. Sir CPT Dr PuppyOnTheRadio GUN UmP WotM NotM FP VFP VFH CM POTM UGM 07:49 22 Jul

Well, chess has been around longer than drunk boobs. But, good man! -RAHB 07:55, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

This sucks --69.132.120.189 19:50, September 22, 2012 (UTC)

Sock puppet

Hey Rahb...who was Rsbj66 the sockpuppet of? He wrote well. --ShabiDOO 23:41, July 22, 2012 (UTC)

I don't know. I don't even remember that name at all. -RAHB 18:10, July 23, 2012 (UTC)

This seems to indicate it was the username Funnybony used before switching to his present account. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 18:29, 23 July 2012

You up for a colonization?

If so, please see Uncyclopedia talk:Imperial Colonization/project. See also: Forum:SOPA is back for dessert! --QZEKЯOM Proud sponsor of Team Zombiebaron Tw$*ty Tw%#ve G*me$ FTW! Let's go for the g^@d! 15:10, July 23, 2012 (UTC)

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July 26th, 2012 • Issue 171 • Proudly supporting editorial independence whenever the board say it's okay

Painting by Numbers By 98.197.156.96 Numbers can shag the sheep, but it isn't any fun. This week some of Uncyclopedia's greatest and not so great have spent some time watching Uncyclopedia pass by without them. This is the news that Wikia has taken the momentous decision to lock out the vast majority of the active administrators and half the users. Problems began at 11:20 UTC on the 24th of July when Socky discovered that he was unable to access a few select features of his account; logging in being the most obvious. Banished to the realm of numbers Socky went to the forums and told everyone else. It soon became apparent that nobody could log in, except for Bizzeebeever, who "made the software his bitch" by pressing the log in button more than even wikia had anticipated. As everyone sat on the forum and debated just how angry and indignant this news should make them, a wikia representative was dispatched to the forum to pour oil on troubled waters, suggesting that Uncyclopedians "Return to causing world suffering or burning me in effigy". But burning effigies of Wikia staff members would have to wait as it became evident that, following the initial lock out of everybody, the adminstrator database had somehow been lost when it was being carried to a new building, or something like that. The administrator magic then gushed into the ground and caused a giant peach to grow outside Wikia headquarters. Pictured: The administrative database This condemned the administrators to a long evening of moaning on the Uncyclopedia IRC channel, where another Wikia representative awaited with nothing but a can do attitude and a lack of information about the problem to ensure that everybody remained as irritated as possible. Even worse than that, following a great deal of moaning somebody started off UnTrivia, forcing everybody through an evening of anagrams and obscure song lyrics. At the time of going to press only Thekillerfroggy appears to have been able to force his way through the log in procedure to use admin tools while users who could log in took full advantage of the absence of any administrators to fill the forum with appalling alternatives to fixing the problem. It would seem that, at present, the only solution is to make a new account and then curry favour with TKF, the only way to do this being fellatio or copious helpings of wang. 13.145.208.87 had this to say about the outage: "Zombiebaron.... FU WIKIA". 67.173.252.79 reported a similar feeling saying "Ahahahahahahahahah...god dammit, why can't I log in?". As we enter a second day with all the admins locked out something novel occurs to me; I can watch Uncyclopedia, and I can shag the sheep, but I don't want to if nobody knows it was me. Loramycetaceae of Ipswich By Socky Loramycetaceae of Ipswich do lorikeets while sitting amidst consecrators a-disciplining the elite. My gonads' dictum ipsilaterally saps your mom. Nullification of the masses accretes the Nibelungen's pretty umpty temperament. Done accelerating liberation. Done cunting shit amidst nisin from a pedo auctioneer named Hendrik. Protein from Trisha's antique rises into risus sardonicus. Doodlebugs' necks beget a menu with fetus. Protein exposure lectures quip Magdalena Corvallis, files nisei fermenter magma, nut amputate diam denim ac tulles. Groin peed. Coned a joust ac oleo perambulator lacing. In presidium collision purls. Letitia venations, nils veal consenter plenteousness, orcas mi male Tussuad urns, veil tempoes nuns est at gurus. Nascence volute. Vivacious Yul trices. Crays portrait offends libeler. Nuns mi amass, collisional veal, dissimilar quips, volute vitae, nuns. Done consequent. Coned congruent peed sit meat denim. Duelist pulmonary ants. Nuns consecrate tether. Done cactus cum, qualm sit mate pulp Tate oculists, just libeler various purrs, seed biennium Turpin purls beget Loramycetaceae. Quizzes we equine dew, Budapest neck, male Tussuad veld, fermentation in, odors. Phallus invites torpor. Integer neck elicit. Nam vitae felts vile Loramycetaceae lacerate Hendrik. Present ornate. Loramycetaceae of Ipswich dolor sit meat, conch secreter a-discoing lite. Sunlamp Isis. Plenteousness vaccinial volute arch. Bisque non nun. In ornate commodity venality. Swed nun rises, gravid at, concuss id, tempts you, Sulla. Phallus is lacking, commodore sled, incident pulmonary, facilitates Vella, Nissie. Vivacious Budapest. Noella enigma. Donne portal Allison dolor. Groin non Maurise. Letitia Loramycetaceae urns, vestibular eat, aliquot vitae, suspicious neck, tulles. Letitia so dales diam egret equine tempos aorta. In ult rices Dolores. Also, I can log in again! Hurrah!

Check out these pages! Zorks! Awkward WikiEd is silly YAWN! That's so retro From our logs: 10:24, July 23, 2012 ChiefjusticeDS (Talk | contribs) blocked 124.148.242.53 (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (I will certainly duel you good sir kni- AHAHAHAHA SNEAK STABBAN ATTACK! I WIN!) 05:17, July 24, 2012 RAHB (Talk | contribs) blocked EugeneKay (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 96874 seconds ‎ (Begged for it. Pathetically. With fellatio. Which was respectable, but still rather pathetic.) 00:18, July 24, 2012 Xamralco (Talk | contribs) blocked 69.115.48.5 (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (Are you hitting on me?) 06:47, July 21, 2012 Thekillerfroggy (Talk | contribs) blocked Adhans (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 month ‎ (with this month off you can maybe find the time to draft one article with fifty words instead of the other way around) 17:14, July 23, 2012 Sockpuppet of an unregistered user (Talk | contribs) blocked 213.198.208.29 (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 2 weeks ‎ (Literal wanker.) 06:43, July 20, 2012 RAHB (Talk | contribs) blocked 58.178.153.139 (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (Before you make your next edit, consider this: Your last few got you banned for a week.) Biopic of the Week What can you say about GEORGIEGIBBONS that he has not said already? Especially as he has already said that he is an asshole. You might not see GEORGIEGIBBONS around the wiki as he is a hopeless timewaster, or IRC user as we normally call them. He does however do a fair bit of recent changes patrolling and votes on VFH when begged to do so. One of his main claims to fame is having the worst internet connection out of everyone in IRC, a title he regularly competes for with ChiefjusticeDS who connects with a Nokia N-Gage. A big positive with GEORGIEGIBBONS, besides the seconds you save by not having to switch off caps lock to type his username, is that he rarely involves himself in drama and it would be splendid to see him editing the wiki a bit more rather than hanging out in IRC lynching other Uncyclopedians and solving anagrams. He's an asshole that way. Wordˢ̭ of the week, provided by: PuppyOnTheRadio Erotic Using a feather as part of love-making Kinky Using the rest of the chicken Newsroom UnTune of the week I Kissed a Girl (And I Threw Up)

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--OliOmniOmbudsman 15:19, July 26, 2012 (UTC)

User:RAHB/Frank Zappa

I read your bit on Zappa. Seems pretty straightforward. I don't know much about him (although my dad's crazy for him). I do, however, currently have Apostrophe (') on hold at the library, although it seems as though it's not coming anytime soon. But once I got a hold on everything and have all the materials needed, I'll probably do the re-write on Zappa. MAT​THL​OCK 17:18, July 31, 2012 (UTC)

Most of what's on that page isn't actually "my bit on Zappa". It's in my userspace because it's just a list of ideas and then a bunch of stuff that I lifted from the current revision (which I had nothing to do with) in the hopes of properly rewriting the article into something genuinely amusing and also befitting of the man himself. Be my guest at doing the rewrite, since I've been stalling on it, mainly because of perfectionism. I must say though, it's probably going to take a lot more research than simply the most commercially successful of his 91 albums in order to paint a terribly accurate picture :P -RAHB 19:54, July 31, 2012 (UTC)

Okay. Also I currently got the Real Frank Zappa book on hold as well. Would you also recommend watching bits from 200 Motels to be helpful to get an idea? MAT​THL​OCK 17:37, August 3, 2012 (UTC)

Oh, dude, yes. The Real Frank Zappa book is probably the best reference you could possibly have. I recommend reading it for writing the article, but I also just recommend reading it for enjoyment in general because it's a hell of a book. 200 Motels would also be excellent to watch because it depicts a lot of Frank's ideas of what touring and being a professional musician are like. Beyond that, both are pretty damn funny in my opinion. Unfortunately 200 Motels is hard to get a hold of because the masters were destroyed by the production company a long time ago and there's currently no DVD release, but there are a number of video rips on various internet sites and the like. Those would be excellent. -RAHB 01:05, August 4, 2012 (UTC)

Nerd shit

Apparently Gentoo's "AMD64" stuff is what you want for an i3. And they do have pre-compiled binaries, if you still want to go that-a-way. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Sat, Aug 4 '12 11:50 (UTC)

Yeah, I've got the AMD64 one burned to a CD. Think I'm just gonna bite the bullet though and leave the laptop with just windows on it. I can't imagine the continuous headache I'd have trying to get all the hardware working in a base system. Problem with installing linux on laptops. I was thinking I'd maybe even go with Ubuntu, but I figure Windows 7 really isn't bad, so I'll just backup all my data on that partition and then use my linux desktop to do pretty much everything that might be a massive security threat. Or something. -RAHB 19:34, August 4, 2012 (UTC)

You could also run...let's say...Mint, or even Knoppix, from a SSD (especially fun if you've got a built-in SD reader). Totally doable. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Sun, Aug 5 '12 8:20 (UTC)

Mango Flower

Hi RAHB, how's it? Here is another psych picture made by a close friend of the Beatles, Colin Jury, which he calls Mango Flower. Thought you would dig it. Stay cool! Cheers!--Funnybony  16:51, Aug 4

Of course I dig it! In fact, I really dig this particular one, the texture and color palette are very nice in addition to the awesome psychedelia. That's the kind of image I'd frame in my home and hang on the wall or something :) -RAHB 19:36, August 4, 2012 (UTC)

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All your readers are belong to us

August 9th, 2012 • Issue 172 • You need to know stuff to be biased!

The state of the Wiki: Summer 2012 By Chief The biggest news of the week this week is that there isn't any news whatsoever, sure there are a few forums in the dump that promise to radically shake up the way everyone edits Uncyclopedia, or at least change it slightly. But for the most part there is no news, which always comes as a great relief to everyone in the UnSignpost office as it means that we can spend this week drivelling about pointless minutia and thus crawl that one vital step closer to death. The state of the wiki is this: nobody is voting for half of the monthly awards. This is naturally a cause of great concern for everybody, the prevailing feeling being that somebody should be nominating and voting for people on these awards, but we'd rather it wasn't us. Nobody is happy with the current VFS system, but nobody can agree on anything to change it to, so the current VFS system has remained with he proviso that everyone sneer about how unfair it is every time it is used. This periodical has already chronicled the appalling miscarriage of justice that allows administrators extra votes on VFS so it with an air of surprise that the UnSignpost can now bring to you a proposal to let administrators run everything. Uncyclopedia's 29th wordy controversy filled blockbuster of the year suggests that the admins run everything because they are the most thorough and most experienced users, the voting section of the same forum being filled with comments from admins saying "Tl;dr" and "I can't be bothered to read your entire essay", hand these splendid fellows the keys to city immediately, the UnSignpost implores you to entrust the administrative body with any nuclear codes or state secrets you might have, safe in the knowledge that they will never ever be looked at. Pictured: This week's admin work schedule Thekillerfroggy has solved the problems of the Worst 100 list by skipping 60 reflections and justifying it with a cliché, absolutely nobody notices and continues adding reflections about themselves and why they are adding a reflection to the list. Modusoperandi adds an actual reflection to the list causing the universe to begin collapsing in upon itself. The final and most grave piece of news is that Uncyclopedia is critically low in images of boobs, totalling only 634 pictures in the boob images category, now either some of you aren't correctly categorising your images of boobs, or there is a serious problem. Socky, who long ago took on the arduous and time consuming task of auditing the boob images category said "How I wank on audit the images properly if they are incorrectly categorised? Please don't keep your not safe for work images to yourself. Categorise them and thus share them with the world!". Uncyclopedia Needs More Vandals By One Step Away From Copyright Violation The UnSignpost editorial staff trying out some vandalism Yeah, you heard me, <insert name here>. Uncyclopedia needs more vandals. Why, you may ask. Why would we need more annoying basement-dwellers to ban? Well, I'll tell you. As all of you may have noticed, Uncyclopedia has been going through some inactivity lately, to the point where users who haven't signed on since who knows when are becoming more active on the site than users who check the website everyday. It seems our competitor has been gaining more activity than us, and we can't let that happen, now can we? There's only one way to get our activity back up: recruit vandals. Most vandals are EDiots anyway (of course, the best vandals are admins), so if we attract some vandals here, maybe they'll attract some more writers! And... er... Second thought, we don't need more vandals. Vandals suck and they should die.

Check out these pages! Why aren't we voting on this? Whales! What's yours? Read this! This is a terrible idea From our logs: 17:50, August 1, 2012 Lyrithya (talk | contribs) blocked 109.152.200.136 (talk) with an expiry time of 1 day (The cat said you were evil. ) 01:06, July 31, 2012 RAHB (talk | contribs) blocked Waltdisneyfan999 (talk | contribs) with an expiry time of infinite (I can't trust Mr-ex to form a coherent sentence most of the time, but I can generally trust his transcendent knowledge of trolls and sockpuppets.) 10:05, August 6, 2012 ChiefjusticeDS (talk | contribs) blocked Lmarine0510 (talk | contribs) with an expiry time of infinite (Whenever you add a shock image to a page on Uncyclopedia God sets fire to a school bus) 06:37, August 4, 2012 RAHB (talk | contribs) blocked 108.59.252.58 (talk) with an expiry time of infinite (LOLDONGS) 12:51, August 8, 2012 ChiefjusticeDS (talk | contribs) blocked 95.0.200.42 (talk) with an expiry time of 2 hours (Creating shite pages, I got banned for that once.) Service outage of the Week So the UnSignpost delivery schedule is in something of a state of flux at the moment, it arrives every two weeks and then it arrives weekly. This is an intolerable state of affairs and you all deserve an explanation. It's all your fault for not writing splendid articles that we can use to fill up the gaping white space that confronts us every single week. Why not write a splendid article that can be placed into the UnSignpost, thus freeing up our editor's busy schedule and allowing him to spend less time slaving away at his keyboard and more time windsurfing with foreign dignitaries. Old-school FA Adobe Potatochop CS4 is the industry standard software for chip production amongst chip shops the length and breadth of England. Available with a number of plug-ins, including the most recent 'extra crispy' update, it is, along with Adobe Suppersready and Adobe Fritolayers, one of Adobe's most well known pieces of software. Released first in the United States, it is currently available for Pringles XP and Pringles Vista under the slogan "Once you chop, you can't stop" and also for Apple Mac as CS4 (Chip Shop 4). Newsroom UnTune of the week Bobby Brown Goes Down (PMRC Edition)

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--ChiefjusticePS2 07:09, August 10, 2012 (UTC)

I'm completely baked right now

I LOEV YOU RAHB WITH MY LEFT AND RIGHT TESTICLES (especially the left) <3 i wish you were here getting stoned with me --MasterWangs CUNT and proud of it! 10:56, August 13, 2012 (UTC)

Dammit, and wouldn't you know it I was getting stoned that night. But I was too engulfed by porn and Doctor Who to sign on. -RAHB 05:35, August 16, 2012 (UTC)

How's right now for you then? I have £25 worth and then I'm going to eat two large pizzas and drink 3 beers. God I love being me. --MasterWangs CUNT and proud of it! 09:37, August 18, 2012 (UTC)

Ah, see, now when that was happening, I was drinking this incredibly wretched corn whiskey that they sell in mason jars. They actually put on the bottle, as a selling point, "Less than 30 days old." It's like drinking battery acid. Oh, but then I got really high and fell asleep. -RAHB 00:09, August 21, 2012 (UTC)

I have no more weed :( that's probably a good thing as I have essays 'n' shit to write. --MasterWangs CUNT and proud of it! 10:34, August 22, 2012 (UTC)

Some guy outside my school asked me today if I know where to find any "dank Mr. Nice Guy". That's some sort of pokemon or something, right? -RAHB 01:17, August 23, 2012 (UTC)

That Castlevania thing?

Hey, remember me? We talked on IRC in few days ago in past about collabing on Castlevania-article. I sort of thought that because I have played only two Castlevania's, it would be hard for me to create article about the whole serie. So, as we have both played Aria of Sorrow, that would be a good idea to write about right? And, if Mr-ex777 is even interested at participating, he/she has played it too! I also had an idea for the article; to do something completely different than other game-related pages here; I thought that if Soma Cruz (the main character, remember?) would personally tell the plot, about the characters, criticism, himself... How'd you like that idea? Cat the Colourful (Feed me!) Zzz 08:53, 18 August, 2012 (UTC)

Could work, certainly. As I said before, what I'll be able to add along to it is probably more absurdity or straight jokes that aren't necessarily all much related to the topics of the games in and of themselves, especially not knowing a whole lot about the characters and overarching story and what not. And we'll probably have to clean up after Mr-ex a bit. Any time you'd like to start let me know. I haven't been as active lately because of my studies, but I'll try to get some stuff in on it. -RAHB 00:20, August 21, 2012 (UTC)

Pee Review?

We need your PEE! Good day loyal PEEING member.The management was wondering if you had noticed the state of the toilet recently. We appear to have developed something of a blockage, and wondered if you might have a plunger handy. Possibly you are one of the rare PEEING members who does actually do regular reviews, in which case please flush this message immediately, otherwise... It's time you reviewed something you lazy bum!

--ChiefjusticePS2 18:18, August 20, 2012 (UTC)

ChiefjusticeDS enjoys buttsex: The UnSignpost!

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

The periodical without any junk in its trunk!

August 23rd, 2012 • Issue 173 • One periodical to rule them all...

Don't mention the merger By Chief Simsilikesims visits UnScripts Playwright of the Month the wastelands. The UnSignpost office is always busy, the phones ringing, the journalists writing, the constant clamouring of eager interview candidates and our editor daydreaming all of the above into existence. If anyone else came through the office every week there wouldn't be room for the crippling loneliness that forms such a massive part of our lives. The same, alas, cannot be said for UnBooks Author of the Month and UnScripts Playwright of the Month whose complete lack of any activity has resulted in them both being rolled into writer of the month. Why is this news? Because it means less voting and if there's less voting there must be less democracy, that's just common sense. Responsible for this dastardly plot is none other than Simsilikesims, you all know Simsilikesims, she's the person who wrote the content warning which we now see approximately six times a day. If you didn't know how content warnings worked before you definitely do now. Simsilikesims has had a number of these good ideas and it's likely that shortly we shall see her malevolent intent, possibly in the form of combining the UnTunes namespace with the mainspace because not enough people are singing their articles in the style of Dragonforce or however it is those people who don't understand magnetic fields sing their songs. What would an intolerable loss of the right of Uncyclopedians to let parts of the wiki fall into a state of abandonment and disrepair be without Thekillerfroggy to swing the hammer of despair? Hoping nobody would notice TKF also decided to smite Reviewer of the Month into the ether. RotM is an award that literally nobody was ever interested in... It's also the only award I've ever won twice, so don't mind me, I'll just be over here sobbing while I look through the archives of the first award I ever won... The Caped Crusader considering an update to the latest UnNews template In other news Mattsnow has stepped down as UnNews' biggest cheese. The war to replace him is now on, the choice being between GlobalTourniquet and a machine who will plaster something onto the front page every so often, a machine and nobody at all. We here in the UnSignpost office haven't quite decided which we prefer and have ultimately decided to vote for Batman instead. Batman has a grappling hook to reach hard-to-reach places, sneaks around wearing leather and is a complete social retard while he's doing the job, in other words he's perfect for the position. If he can save Gotham from the Joker then we have absolute confidence in his ability to read articles and then put them in a template on a fairly regular basis. Do you have an opinion? Too bad, because you don't get a say; GlobalTourniquet started doing the whole thing last Saturday. Happy Thursday! The feature feature By Chief Don't make Thekillerfroggy knock down your ceiling... "VFH sucks right now." proclaims the banner that greets all visitors to the VFH page. We've all seen it, probably whilst passing through and very pointedly not visiting VFP which is now beginning to resemble the immediate aftermath of a Nuclear event. However, this reporter has come up with an alternative explanation: it isn't VFH that sucks, it's all of you, and by extension all of us, which also happens to be all of me. Uncyclopedians, famous for their flame wars and constant douchebaggery seem to have come to the conclusion that when on VFH that it's better not to vote than to disagree. What else could account for the 15 plus voter turnout for articles that we all agree are fantastically well written/crafted, while articles which may well be of high quality, but bear the title "UnNews:Politicians politicise the filing system of plumbing the South-Eastern region of the Ukraine" struggle along, accruing 7 votes for before sitting on the feature queue until they die of old age. This alongside the fact that people can't be bothered means Thekillerfroggy is beside himself at the state of things. Why TKF? Because he seem to have appointed himself supreme worrier in-chief for VFH and is executing that duty by slapping increasingly urgent messages onto the page. "DON'T MAKE ME PUT IN CAPITALS" twitched Thekillerfroggy when approached by the UnSignpost about the latest message. ... Or expose you to ionising radiation How do we fix this? Voting, obviously, but it's more than that. Yes, you might only have time to vote on just one article, yes you are probably more likely to enjoy the article with 20 votes than 5, but unless you vote the articles with 5 votes will never have 20. There are lots of articles to vote on, but you have ages to do it in! This article has been there for a month and has managed 10 votes. Twitter managed 17 in 5 days! Are you people pulling our balls? Don't make us use the awe inspiring powers of caps lock to get our way, VOTE NOW!

Check out these pages! Still going Tweet tweet We're famous! Teh feechur Q Nobody Cares From our logs: 15:41, August 15, 2012 Hotadmin4u69 (talk | contribs) blocked 83.146.246.120 (talk) with an expiry time of 1 week (You are such a good contributor that I am giving you the next week off to find Jesus.) 15:43, August 12, 2012 ChiefjusticeDS (talk | contribs) blocked 198.228.200.154 (talk) with an expiry time of 1 week (Incorrectly adding ICU tags and generally taking it up the arse like a champ) 09:51, August 21, 2012 Romartus (talk | contribs) blocked 71.129.63.113 (talk) with an expiry time of 1 week (I think you need to lie down for a week after producing that noble effort. ) 03:11, August 14, 2012 Lee Harvey Osmond (talk | contribs) blocked WONDER WANDAL (talk | contribs) with an expiry time of infinite (but ur like, rly rly dum) 16:44, August 9, 2012 Thekillerfroggy (talk | contribs) blocked Imrealized (talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 day ("this is stupid" your profound criticism is valid and necessary, where's your pulitzer dude???) 22:04, August 17, 2012 Zombiebaron (talk | contribs) blocked Mohamed loves hot canadian (talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 6 months (Suicide is painless, but it brings on many changes) 06:16, August 20, 2012 Hotadmin4u69 (talk | contribs) blocked Tauhid (talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 2 hours (Leave that picture alone. And don't revert admins. And suck me dry.) Biopic of the Week I was in two minds about the biopic this week. One of my minds wanted to biopic a picture of the UnSignpost dog or how much I enjoy cutting corners by filling sections of the UnSignpost with pictures of a dog, the other wanted to biopic a real person with a pancreas. So congratulations Snippy, you win the biopic on the basis that you actually exist. Snippy is one of those suspicious fellows who we all suspect has done all this before. He's funny, an immediate danger sign, he's polite, another danger sign and, most damning of all he's competent. Naturally Uncyclopedia has welcomed him with open arms, a noob of the moment nomination and constant accusations that he is somebody's sockpuppet. All of you who haven't met him yet should swing by his talk page and say hello, read his Minecraft article and vote for him on Noob of the Moment. Be sure to discourage him from such displays of competence in future, or we'll have to ban him out of principle. We'll probably return to the biopics of traffic cones and imaginary animals in the next UnSignpost, so no need to be concerned that we're upping our game. Old-school FA Aesop's Fables are a collection of moral tales by Aesop, who is some old, dead, Greek guy. These fables use interesting stories, which feature English-speaking animals as the character base, to get across a moral. They were written to be relevant and meaningful to children who could relate to the various stereotypes the animals symbolized. Aesop wrote his stories in this manner because he was inarticulate and couldn't just get to the point. I had a collection of fables when I was younger, and you know what it taught me? Not a goddamn thing! Newsroom UnTune of the week Congressman in Drag Hammer Time!

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~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) 08:27, August 23, 2012 (UTC)

RAHB

I've been nominated for Perv of the Month. How would you like to vote for me? MAT​THL​OCK 17:50, August 30, 2012 (UTC)

Whatever floats your boat :) -RAHB 19:42, August 30, 2012 (UTC)

Thank you

I have no idea what was going on in that user's head when he decided to write "YOU'VE BEEN WHIPPED!! I IS IN DAR CITY" on my userpage and reverted to (what I presume was his) edits, even though they violated the rules on how NRV works. What does that even mean? Anyway, thanks for reverting and banning him. -- ENTER CITADEL T)alk C)untributions B)an 23:34, August 30, 2012 (UTC)

Yeah, he's just a regular vandal that comes here and...does that sort of thing. No worries. -RAHB 23:48, August 30, 2012 (UTC)

Thanks...

For voting me as Perv of the Month. As a reward, I will not bang your girlfriend. MAT​THL​OCK 20:40, September 5, 2012 (UTC)

Then the whole thing was worth it. -RAHB 03:40, September 6, 2012 (UTC)

Crappolio-Faggolio

HA HA HA AI EV VANDALAIZ'D IOUR PEIG END IOUR SAIT. ORA LO STILE ITALIANO DEL CRAPPOLIO COLPISCE SEMPRE VIVA IL CRAPPOLIO. NON PUOI BLOCCARMI. --Faggolio (talk) 03:42, September 6, 2012 (UTC)

It's always good when vandals let you know they're around. Sir CPT Dr PuppyOnTheRadio GUN UmP WotM NotM FP VFP VFH CM POTM UGM 04:54 06 Sep

It's even better when they're speaking...what is that, Latin? That's funny. -RAHB 13:07, September 6, 2012 (UTC)

Set phasers to frag! It's the UnSignpost!

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

Now With 0 Trans Fat!

September 6th, 2012 • Issue 174 • When we were your age, this was all fields...

My "coming out" By Chief This story is exceptionally gay Hey girlfriends! This week the UnSignpost puts the "Queen" in "Drama Queen" as it discusses the issues which are literally the bomb. The biggest bomb this week, besides how darling our UnSignpost correspondents look in their new outfits, is that Zombiebaron wants the wiki to improve, this means deleting most of it and playing trivia on IRC. The bigger news is that PoofyOnTheRadio also wants the wiki to improve, this means not playing trivia on IRC and sending editors out onto the internet in order to sell their bodies to Google in the hopes that this will increase traffic to the wiki. These squabbles are ultimately self-defeating, while we are arguing amongst ourselves whether or not we ought to change the beginner's guide into an 20 minute video and a fireworks display we still haven't managed to do anything. What we have decided is that articles can be deleted with less than +5 votes to delete and that RAHB is very good at trivia if nothing else. The other big news from weeks ago is that Mattsnow has stopped being in charge of UnNews after a period of however long it is he has been doing that. Shabidoo who loves to do "zany" stuff so he can get into the UnSignpost, has created an extra forum to ensure that absolutely nobody thanks Mattsnow and instead demonstrates just how hilarious they are. Congratulations to Zombiebaron who came out with the completely obvious joke before anyone else. Finally GlobalTourniquet, the new UnNews Quasar (by appointment of himself) is open to criticism... and penis, lol. VFHarassment By Chief There's nobody here... Remember the heady days of two weeks ago when we told you all to feel very bad because VFH didn't have enough nominations. Well forget that because now it does and we can move our sensationalist bandwagon elsewhere. Where better to send it than Pee review, currently known as the namespace that isn't a namespace that time forgot. Five reviews for the entire month of August demonstrates that nobody really seems particularly interested in assisting the review process. It might take a little while to do a Pee Review but there is a reason we have the space. It is of particular concern as we have a list of people who are supposed to be doing reviews at least once a month, myself included. Where are we? Who knows, but we certainly aren't perusing the list of articles awaiting review. Let's go over there! Let's bring Thekillerfroggy who can put a stern template at the top of the page and insist that this is hugely important to the wiki, guess what.... IT IS!!! Also there is likely to be a new VFS this month, bring on the voting, it makes everything better! REVIEW SOMETHING YOU BUNCH OF SLACKERS! Why, again, are we counting to a million? By One Step Away From Copyright Violation A tremendous waste of everybody's time please Carol Ever since 2008, Uncyclopedia has had a tradition of counting to a million. Started by Spang, this tradition has been going on for nearly five years. However, recently the question was asked relating to the value of the forum, with users complaining that it was "completely devoid of humor" and that it turns smart users into idiots. After mass protest (okay, not really) from the contributors of the thread and from someone else, said users commented on the forum saying that counting to a million is why so many articles supposedly suck nowadays and it's also why VFH is completely empty. It has also been stated that only idiots would do it. So now I'm attempting to answer it as quickly as I can: that's the point. We're idiots and we know that we're never going to make it to a million, but we want to see how close we can get anyway. So if you are the type of idiot that would write for Uncyclopedia, feel free to assist us in our count to one million, or close to.

Check out these pages! Tweet tweet Candy Girls! VFS!! The real VFS link From our logs: 03:08, August 30, 2012 Lee Harvey Osmond (talk | contribs) blocked 95.233.217.65 (talk) with an expiry time of infinite (if i were confident that you understood english, i'd say something naughty) 21:56, August 29, 2012 ChiefjusticeDS (talk | contribs) blocked 212.183.128.49 (talk) with an expiry time of 3 days (Caring about football... that's actually a life sentence when you think about it.) 00:03, August 30, 2012 RAHB (talk | contribs) blocked 76.178.53.110 (talk) with an expiry time of 3 months (Stay away from theatres, you thespian!) 19:02, September 3, 2012 RAHB (talk | contribs) blocked 86.151.117.175 (talk) with an expiry time of 1 week (lol blacks. They're almost as bad as Jews.) 02:32, August 29, 2012 Xamralco (talk | contribs) blocked Roccohene (talk | contribs) with an expiry time of infinite (Gambling is a sin, but Jesus still loves you. Visit your local church and repent today!) Biopic of the Week We haven't put the UnSignpost Dog in the UnSignpost for ages, so now we have. Old-school FA Since the dawn of time, Man has been responsible for creating his own entertainment. The ingenuity of the human mind has given us cock fighting, badger baiting, pogroms and, most consistently popular, WAR. Rarely has there been a time when man has not taken pleasure from smiting other men with the jaw-bone of an ass, or amused his friends by firing Phosphorus missiles into crowded population centres. But not all wars are the same, so just which wars did we enjoy the most? Over the centuries Historians have struggled to find consensus on just how to measure the popularity of wars and this dispute itself led to the so called “Wussy War” of 1952 when Professor AJP Taylor triumphed over the forces of Noam Chomsky. Newsroom UnTune of the week Piano Ballad

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

--ChiefjusticePS2 10:54, September 6, 2012 (UTC)

September admin nominations

Go nominate and vote for new admins here. -- Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 03:06, September 11, 2012 (UTC)

Project Castlevania

I'm sorry that I've told you that I have so much pictures and content for the project Castlevania, but, I've done nothing... But, be prepared; I promise that I will propably maybe hopefully upload some pictures next week! Then we would officially start this! Cat the Colourful (Feed me!) Zzz 18:02, 15 September, 2012 (UTC)

You propably found out (or maybe not) that I gave some screenshots from Final Fantasy I to Matthlock just few minutes ago. And no screenshots for you. I'm currently using a computer that doesn't show small pictures of the screenshots, so it would take me too much time to check which one of the screenshots is for you. (Yeah, I have loads of screenshots saved in my phone.) So, the pictures will appear to you maybe next week. I hope you can wait few days. :) Cat the Colourful (Feed me!) Zzz 13:17, 21 September, 2012 (UTC)

The screenshots really aren't the most important part anyway. The actual text content is, and I haven't written anything, so no worries. -RAHB 21:10, September 21, 2012 (UTC)

I know, I know. But a good page isn't a good one without pictures, right? :) And I've got them. So, I created a page with all the pictures I currently have, and I'll upload the edited picture after it's done; logic. :D I'll work on the picture after I've found the exact font or a font that at least looks like it. Cat the Colourful (Feed me!) Zzz 13:28, 26 September, 2012 (UTC)

Content Warning

I noticed you deleted this August 30. I copied what it says when we visit the wiki.

WARNING: Wikia, "yo mamma", and your boss may not approve of this website. If you are under the age of 12, please look elsewhere for homework help. If you are at least 13 years old, not easily offended, not looking for politically correct content, and looking for a wide variety of parody and satire, you have come to the right place. Should you be offended by the content, please complain to one of our administrators, not to Wikia. Most articles here are in a constant state of change, and that change can be YOU, if you continue. -- Simsilikesims(?UN)

I am wondering, is there a place we can link to which has this text so that people can read it? Since it goes away after we see it the first time? +yc 08:07, September 19, 2012 (UTC)

I think there's probably a template for it somewhere. Not sure where... Zombiebaron might know. There's also screenshots all over the forums and stuff. Why do you need to be able to link to it? -RAHB 08:44, September 19, 2012 (UTC)

Is This Some Kind of Fucking Joke?!

I really like this article. I especially like the introduction (I could just picture myself eating those Jalapeno Cheddar Cheetos). Was this based off of events from your life? MAT​THL​OCK 00:35, September 20, 2012 (UTC)

Not based on events. Fortunately I've never been robbed or married. I have, however eaten jalapeno cheddar cheetos and they basically inspired me to write the article in a roundabout sort of way. They're delicious :D -RAHB 00:07, September 21, 2012 (UTC)

What about the part of passing out on the couch while watching reruns of the Cosby Show and Three's Company. Did that have anything to do with your life? MAT​THL​OCK 19:26, September 22, 2012 (UTC)

I like to think my life is more interesting than writing about myself falling asleep watching Cosby and Three's Company :/ They're just stuff I threw in. -RAHB 22:38, September 22, 2012 (UTC)

IP votes for infinite monkeys

Yeah I thought that was strange too. I have never seen so many. I only post links to my articles on facebook when they are featured, to celebrate my win. So it isn't my own family and friends - I haven't told them about it. I think the preponderance of IPs may be because there are pages and pages of "What links here" results for it. I found it on Special:WantedPages near the very top, so maybe it's getting a lot of link-throughs, then hitting the VFH template link after they laugh at the funny monkeys. The evidence will show that I am innocent, your honor. -- GlobalTourniquet: UnAstrologer, UnJournalist, shameless narcissistic America-hating liberal atheist award-winning featured writer 14:41, September 26, 2012 (UTC)

Now there's another one today. This is ridiculous. Now I'm suspicious of them - is someone gaming this thing? It isn't me. Maybe we should remove them all. Is there a way to find out if they are legit? They all come from IPs with no other contributions. -- GlobalTourniquet: UnAstrologer, UnJournalist, shameless narcissistic America-hating liberal atheist award-winning featured writer 23:53, September 26, 2012 (UTC)

I was thinking the same as you were. It's a pretty heavily-linked page, it's probably just getting lots of notice from casual readers. In particular I think a lot of DYK and anniversary and such stuff have it linked a bunch of times. But that's no problem really. It wouldn't have been a problem either, by the way, if you had been telling your family and friends about it, seeing as they're all different people and it can expose the site to them and stuff (although for obvious reasons I refrain from telling my family very much about Uncyclopedia). The only problem comes when one person is doing a bunch of votes and trying to pass them off as all different. Unfortunately there's no way to check if two different IPs are being used by the same person, but unless this one just gets ridiculously out of control I have no reason to believe they are at the moment. Especially since they're all different classes of IP. Except I don't know if that's especially since I don't know whether ISPs assign dynamic IPs in different class ranges. And never mind anyways because I guess they could always be using proxies. In which case we'd probably never know. So....yes, I hope that clears that up then :P -RAHB 04:02, September 27, 2012 (UTC)

And another today. I did some checking and they are all over the globe if [1] is to be believed. Which, who knows? Well, monkeys are always funny... -- GlobalTourniquet: UnAstrologer, UnJournalist, shameless narcissistic America-hating liberal atheist award-winning featured writer 15:52, September 27, 2012 (UTC)

I'm pretty sure it would've gotten featured either way, so no worries. But we've been getting lots of IPs nominating articles (and failing), and doing other VFH stuff. It might have more to do with the site notice thing. Who knows? Congrats on another feature regardless :D -RAHB 01:38, September 28, 2012 (UTC)

Hey

What's happening with the patrolling? I go and it gets completely ignored? Sir CPT Dr PuppyOnTheRadio GUN UmP WotM NotM FP VFP VFH CM POTM UGM 01:29 28 Sep

Beats me. I never paid much attention to it to begin with. Frosty would probably be one to ask. He's an admin now and stuff, too. -RAHB 01:36, September 28, 2012 (UTC)

He's off at the moment. I know it's school holidays in Victoria, so he's either on holidays or studying most likely. BB, MrN, Frosty and I were about the only ones who kept an eye on it, and with three of those members no longer that active it seems to have fallen by the wayside. Sir CPT Dr PuppyOnTheRadio GUN UmP WotM NotM FP VFP VFH CM POTM UGM 02:17 28 Sep

Please...

Help. I beg you. Cat the Colourful (Feed me!) Zzz 05:27, 8 October, 2012 (UTC)