User talk:Olliewasabi

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edit Welcome to Uncyclopedia

Spike the Dog (06b)

Spike is a grumpy old dog. You can stroke his fur, or you can be smitten by his stick. It is up to you.

Hello, Olliewasabi, and welcome to Uncyclopedia. This is a wiki (a collection of pages anyone can edit). Words in blue are "links" and can be clicked to take you to another page. This wiki is for comedy. It pretends it's Wikipedia, but we make people laugh, not bore them. If you aren't interested in a fake encyclopedia but in writing fake news stories, we have UnNews, and there are other projects for scripts, lyrics, how-to guides, and so on.

What you can do

You can create your own article. For starters, create it under your own name; for example, User:Olliewasabi/Bedbug. (The red instead of blue is a link to a page that doesn't yet exist.) We have a list of articles that need to be created. You can help without writing articles; just read articles and, if you see an improvement in writing or in comedy, jump in and edit it. In fact, you can help without writing at all, such as organizing, watching for vandals, or even greeting other new users.

What you need

To write articles, you need a sense of humor and an ability to write good English. We all have strengths and weaknesses and you can get help in any area. But everyone needs an ability to work with other people. Be polite, positive, and helpful toward others, and assume others are doing the same toward you.

What to read

Here are some pages that might help you:

For personal help
  • The administrators are willing to help you, and several Uncyclopedians are willing to adopt you.
  • I will watch this page for a while and will know if you edit it. Afterward, you can contact me on my own talk page.
  • If you've written an article, we have a review process where an experienced Uncyclopedian will read it and tell you how to improve it.
How to post to talk pages

Please follow these general rules:

  • Add comments at the end of a talk page so people notice them.
  • Start your paragraphs with one or more : characters to indent them and set them off from other people's posts.
  • At the end, type ~~~~ (four tildes), which gets replaced by your user name and the current date and time.
  • Don't delete anyone's messages. In case of any controversy, we depend on an accurate record of what was written. You may disavow your remarks by striking them through like this.

I hope you enjoy it here and write a lot of funny stuff! Spıke ¬ 23:57 3-Apr-13

edit Madonna

Yes, Madonna was born in Michigan. No, Michigan is not a suburb of England. Neither a true statement nor a false statement is funny by itself. You have to work at it. (See How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid for dozens of other tips.) To add to a funny article, write funny stuff. Cheers! Spıke ¬ 00:15 4-Apr-13

I added the Michigan, England reference in regard to her faux British accent. It is mildly funny I suppose, it wasn't gut busting though. --Olliewasabi (talk) 11:15, April 4, 2013 (UTC)

Oh, I see. No, what you added doesn't make me think of her accent. Her accent is deserving of ridicule, and you might add a section explaining to the Uncyclopedia reader the astonishing history of how she came to have it; still, I would keep the Intro tight. Spıke ¬ 11:25 4-Apr-13

edit Kathy Griffin

Good work just now. Comments:

  • Ensure that all your links actually exist (don't come up red).
  • Don't make links of year numbers; even Wikipedia no longer does this.
  • Consider getting rid of the Discography. Long lists of dumb puns invite anonymous editors to add "just one more" forever.

Cheers! Spıke ¬ 12:33 4-Apr-13

PS--My note about the Discography also applies to any article's section on Fun Facts and final section of quotations, and sometimes to an overlong See Also section; these are magnets for anonymous editors who can't actually write a paragraph. I pared back Fun Facts just now. If you see any humor here--for example, if it especially relates to reality to claim that Griffin's gender is ambiguous--write some text and locate it higher in the article. If not, consider deleting it outright. Spıke ¬ 12:46 5-Apr-13

edit Nicole Scherzinger

Good work! Needs pix. Please just double-space between sections. Spıke ¬ 12:38 5-Oct-13

How do I upload to server and to the article? How can I be sure it is not a copyrighted pic? Thanks. The preceding unsigned comment was added by Olliewasabi (talk • contribs)

Get the photo on your computer, then go to Special:Upload and follow the instructions. It can be a copyrighted photo and we can claim "fair use" if it is newsworthy and we are misusing it for satire--less justified when someone else created comedy and the Uncyclopedian is merely trying to transfer their humor to our website. Be sure to use the pulldown menu to state whether we are claiming "fair use" or actually have rights to the photo, and write a description that will help other authors search for it for other uses on the site. To get it in the article, use coding such as I used at the start of this talk page. Spıke ¬ 13:37 5-Oct-13

edit Kesha

You defended your edit on the talk page and my revert was in error. I see toilet humor being multiplied and assume the worst. Please don't be offended; edit conflicts and disagreements are routine on "an encyclopedia that anyone can edit." Not everyone reviews all edits on the wiki, though, and a more typical way to ensure that your objection is seen is to take it to the talk page of the editor you disagree with. Happy editing! Spıke ¬ 11:33 14-Oct-13

edit Would you work on those red-links?

Hi again! When you put something in [[double brackets]], it refers to an Uncyclopedia page; and if it comes up red, the page doesn't exist. If you really feel that someone should create the page, as I did most recently about Bob Dole, okay; otherwise, either unmake the link, or use the [[destination|appearance]] form to point it to some page that does exist and keep it reading the way you want it to read. Also, like Wikipedia, only the first use in an article needs to be a link at all; not each use, like bodybuilding in Nicole Scherzinger. Thanks! Spıke ¬ 22:39 14-Oct-13

edit Michael Jackson

Regarding your comment on this article's talk page: Vandalism happens on wikis. But the current version is almost exactly the Featured Article version voted to run on the main page (naturally, because at that point people other than registered Uncyclopedians can't edit it). Therefore, I'm not going to intervene, as we tend to assume that FA's don't need comedy help. Separately, posting to the middle of an article talk page, especially one this sprawling, usually ensures that no one reads it. Spıke ¬ 00:01 13-Nov-13

edit Nicole Scherzinger Part Deux

I added a couple of pictures. I like the 'run' of the story but wonder if some of the random could be changed to the more plausible. Let me know!. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 17:55, November 18, 2013 (UTC)

I appreciate the new pictures, nice touch. My Uncyclopedia style in general is 'random' but if there are a few things that don't fit please let me know. I've read it so many times I can't really see it in a 'fresh light'. --Olliewasabi (talk) 19:26, November 18, 2013 (UTC)

Hi, sorry missed your reply. The 'early years' background. The Schwarzenegger/Scherzinger idea isn't bad but I don't see how Tina Turner and Barack Obama fit in or advence the joke for example. Since it is your first article, I thought it showed great promise. Everyone here starts somewhere and takes time to polish up an approach to writing. I don't mind helping here so let me know. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 23:12, November 24, 2013 (UTC)
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