User talk:Myocardialinfarction

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edit I like this

Untitled (Epitaph for Lord Castlereagh)

Posterity will ne'er survey
A nobler scene than this.
Here lie the bones of Castlereagh.
Stop traveller, and piss.

        -- George Gordon Noel (Lord Byron)

edit Also this charming metaphor

"With an ashtray big as a fucking really big brick" (Nick Cave, O'Malley's Bar)

edit And possibly my favourite

Alright, Mr Corman. I'm ready for my close-up.

edit Some pages I've liked and was in the mood to put here

edit Quick links for inconvenience

User:Myocardialinfarction/Sexual_Orienteering

edit Welcome to the nuthouse. You'll love being here.



Hello Myocardialinfarction, and welcome to Uncyclopedia!
So what's this message all about?
I noticed you have recently joined our community and that you have tried your new toddler feet at making some contributions to our little collection of articles. I really hope you thought a little before acting, since otherwise you'll get into trouble with these guys faster than I did... :(
Anyway, if you have not already, I SERIOUSLY recommend that you read the link below:
Probably the second most important thing for a newcomer is:
- It's not an insult, and it's well worth a look.


If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia, try these:


I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button (Button sig) above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.
If you need help, feel free to ask me on my talk page (if this message has appeared in the last few minutes, I'm probably still on-line, heck, I'm likely glued to my keyboard, for a change), or trolling about in chat. You can also ask an administrator on their talk page or add the following: {{help}} to this page along with a message and someone will come along and help you if they can. Additionally, the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Browse our list of available mentors, and leave them a message on their talk page.
Again, welcome! -- DameViktoria Heart_anim.gif Icons-flag-gb - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log)


edit None of my good ideas will ever make it here

I'll post here as I can be bothered (which is rare)

  • Not quite done yet. Was lacking a lot of fundamental jokes, it's still too random and in need of fiddling. Bung it here shortly. Hold your breath, do.
  • Why? Kneel before Zod
  • Gone fisting
  • Scratch a liberal and you'll find a fascist. (That explains this itch. Also 'find the fascist' is probably a party game of some kind.)
  • Sea Bass solo
  • Warhammer 401K
  • Campaign For Real Meths
  • Celebrity Master Chief
  • Why? Won't you fucking die?
  • Why? Put the lotion in the basket?
  • Why? Call your mother, motherfucker?
  • Bauer pharmaceuticals
  • Whitney Houston, we have a problem
  • Jebus. See why the heading?

edit Pie

Sir, you caught the football but have a foot out of bounds. This article purports to be encyclopedic and sneaks jokes in; your section purports to tell a joke, which I am about to figure out. (And how did you know I am adopted?) But at least you put the section at the end. Regarding the initial photo, I do not know yet how to search the media; I merely typed in Pie.jpg and that was the first thing that popped out. User:SpikeFromNH/signature 17:38, October 2, 2009 (UTC)

I do apologise. Your article (especially that magnificent photo & caption) made me giggle, so I wanted to contriibute. I'm really not suggesting eating your mother. Unless you're hungry.
No, I like the joke, just not joking so overtly. Would you mind if I moved your new section to make it the caption of the little cow cartoon? User:SpikeFromNH/signature 03:48, October 3, 2009 (UTC)
Of course not - your article. Maybe even put it on talk page? Myocardialinfarction 11:36, October 3, 2009 (UTC)
It's now a caption (sorry not to wait for your reply!); and, in the bargain, the section entitled "Clean-up" again directly follows the one on "Pie throwing"! Not "my article," of course. (Unfortunately, sometimes.) User:SpikeFromNH/signature 11:49, October 3, 2009 (UTC)
Changed my mind! your joke now is introduced dead-pan) at the very top of the article, and told in a footnote. The cow cartoon is left uncaptioned and cryptic. Rationale on the talk page. Am glad you helped. User:SpikeFromNH/signature 15:33, October 3, 2009 (UTC)
Marvelous. Thanks for a) using the joke, b) structuring it for best effect and c) the lesson in doing so. Glad I could contribute.

edit Tip

If you put something on someone's talk page, and they reply to you, don't then go and remove it - it can be confusing, particularly when you get to my age. How you do things on your own talk page is up to you, but anything on another talk page that more people than just you have contributed to should not be removed unless it's archived, or otherwise removed by the person whose talk page it is. Good luck with the PLS! --UU - natter UU Manhole 14:31, Oct 13

Oops. My bad. Thanks for the help. Myocardialinfarction 16:00, October 13, 2009 (UTC)

edit Kyle MacLachlan

thnx dude! Its rare to have a finished article recognised and praised, never mind one thats half-done. thnx again. --Matfen 12:40, November 16, 2009 (UTC)

edit Nicholas John Griffin

Apologies for the removal of whoever the hell that was. I assumed it was one of those 'DAN IS GAY' edits, as opposed to one of yours which are rather funny. Myocardialinfarction 15:16, November 17, 2009 (UTC)

That's alright. The Griffin page: pictures are fine, words need a lot of revision. I don't know where to start. Do you?

Anstander 18 Nov '09

Oh Lordy Lou. I have to think of that neo-Nazi tossbag again. Okay. I'll have a think when I'm on the bog this morning. Myocardialinfarction 07:40, November 18, 2009 (UTC)

edit VFD coding

You put your entire comment inside the template, like this (with double curly braces): {Delete|Hey! What's going on here?} Text in there replaces "Delete." as your vote and appears in bold. The previous guy intended his comment to come out that way. What you want is: {Delete} Hey! This sucks! It's fixed now. Spıke ¬  22:53 18-Dec-09

Much obliged, thanks. Myocardialinfarction 22:54, December 18, 2009 (UTC)

PS--It was Pelargonium; he often replaces "Delete" with the worst passage of the article in question. Spıke ¬  22:59 18-Dec-09

edit Well spotted...

...and corrected - that's one of the most irritating mis-spellings of all, in my opinion. If you want to give the article a further polish, go ahead - you can either change the feature to something else or let me know and I'll change it. :-) Rabbi Techno Icons-flag-gb kvetch Icon rabbi Contribs Foxicon FOXES 08:36, July 10, 2010 (UTC)

edit My name's Adam Kay... and my name's Suman Biswas

having noticed your nick, I wondered whether either of those names ring a bell to you -- Prof. Olipro Icons-flag-gb KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. (Harass) 18:04, August 2, 2010 (UTC)

Do you know, I actually hadn't heard of them and had to Ask Dr Google, which was rather a good laugh. Thanks! Suman Biswas deserves a round of applause in and of itself. Myocardialinfarction 19:04, August 2, 2010 (UTC)

edit Good edit on puddle

Yeah, something like that was part of the original page, and Maniac wanted it back in someplace so I obliged him. You made the right choice here, it doesn't really fit the tone of the page anymore. Thanks. Aleister 2:34 3 8

Please work on the page as well, if you want to. I did enough edits to save it, and want to go back and enlarge it, but you seem to like it too (what there is to like. Did you see it before my edits or after?). Maybe together we can make it a feature, although it would take a lot to convince some users that the topic could float. Dive in the puddle! Aleister 17:17 3 8
Got your note, let's talk in one place, maybe here or on the article's talk page. Nah, it won't be deleted, it's as good as saved already. So just edit on the page, maybe keep it high quality without going deep into the shit, the best way to do a shit article is to elevate it (that's why the artsy stuff). Maniac1075 may do some edits, and we have to lock him down and hose him every few hours or he breaks out into the open (do you know Maniac1075 and his work? Wild as a bucking bronco, to start, check out Wonder Showzen or UnBooks:Ex Box). I'm working on my contest entry today, Tombstone, so will be under glass most of the day. heh heh. Aleister 19:05 3 8
(Doubled over) Maybe he/she/it is insane, but on the basis of Wonder Showzen, he/she/it definitely kicks ass. Myocardialinfarction 02:21, August 4, 2010 (UTC)
I know! And he's got a hundred of them or so. He's done something like 40 articles off the requested article list alone. Sometimes I take time to proofread and edit one of his pages, and often have to quit a third of the way down because there is so much content on some of his pages. Al 2:23 4 8

edit Good on ya!

Newcookie Happytimes has awarded you a cookie!
For editing UN:PROOF to look moar uniform and all that.
Now go play in terrific.
 Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~ Xkey280 ~  04 Aug 2010 ~ 00:38 (UTC)

edit Hello, me again

I can't help but notice that you haven't responded to my comment on the David Cameron talk page. I don't mean to be pushy but I can't help but feel that you'd find it quite enlightening. Hoping you are well. --86.133.224.82 20:57, August 5, 2010 (UTC)

Not at all: I read it and it is. I just didn't have anything to say that was really worth posting. Hope you're well too. Myocardialinfarction 23:24, August 5, 2010 (UTC)

edit Hee hee

Check out Prohibition. Aleister 00:32 6 8

edit I noticed

... you've been doing some UN:PS work. I greatly appreciate it!

Newcookie Happytimes has awarded you a cookie!
Now go play in terrific!
 Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~ Xkey280 ~  16 Aug 2010 ~ 06:42 (UTC)

edit VFD

Sorry that was my mistake regards the voting there. Spike alerted me to the issue. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 09:34, October 21, 2010 (UTC)

edit Formatting on VFD

"Is something going [wrong] with the macros?" you ask in the Change Summary. Incidentally, something did yesterday, as discussed at User talk:ChiefjusticeDS, quickly fixed.

In VFD, having the count restart at 1 is a common problem. An extra carriage return in the table can do it in a way that isn't obvious in the text editor. (Romartus, once given a three-day ban for bad formatting, is not the culprit this time.) Also, the only safe way to append a comment to a # item is to use #: and #:: and so on. Spıke ¬ 13:43 7-Dec-10

edit Eek!

I just looked at the woty page, and saw your vote and kind words. Thank you so much, very appreciated. Now I have to live up to some of the things being said about me, and all I want to do is eat, sleep, and read, sometimes in that order. Now I'll have to start to work on some pages just to keep running in place. What goes on with you? People clammer for you to come back more often, and the town square is full of wanted posters for you (I think that's a good thing?). I've heard that posses are being formed to find you and bring you in (another good thing?). Thanks again! Aleister 21:49 11 1 '11

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