User talk:Magic man/archive4

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edit Old stuffs

  • Archive one - I come to the wonderful world of Uncyclopedia. Get yelled at alot (not really yelled but just told I was doing something wrong). Get some spam from spam man. And a dance from Dancing dude. I write some articles, revert some vandals, which gets me nomed for Uncyclopedian of the Month (I failed), and an honorary 2nd dance from Dancing dude. I start reviewing, writing requested articles, and getting the the UnSignpost. Halloween comes and goes, And I become 2nd in command for the grue army. I get thanked for voting on VFH, UGotM, and Uotm, judge the aristocrat's turkey day ball, join Imperial Colonization, and for some reason get a death threat from Poiz. Not necessarily in that order.
  • Archive two - I prove to Lyrithya that I'm an asshole, get my first Uncyclopedia rape, Christmas comes and goes, I do some more reviewing, win the World's Best Friend, Magician of the month and sandwich of the month award, Dancing dude's dance page gets made, that dickhead Magic man does some vote whoring, I get thanked for voting on stuff, become a member of PEEING, answer noob questions, do more stuff for Imperial Colonization, Alister sprinkles his silliness all over, I write a controversial article, greet some more noobs, I get a cookie from Mimo which somehow ends up in a showdown in MS paint, do some coding stuff, get another cookie from Mr. Soot Gremlin, I finally get an article featured, do some VFD stuff with SPIKE, attempt to speak greek, explane to JackOfSpades why my user talk page is "So fucking red", Mimo calls me a dick, I am informed that my sig is outrageous, someone leaves a message to everyone on my talk page, I WIN! I leave for four days, I get a death threat from Another n00b, and Uncyclopedia breaks. Oh! And did I mention I get yelled at some more? (Wow! Was that a run-on-sentence or what?)
  • Archive three - I get "eaten", a penis lollipop finds it's way to my mouth, talking in Japanese, I judge the happy monkey competition, vote whoring, I adopt a noob, a poem-off between me, Al, and Mimo, I make two banners for the happy monkey competition which never get put up, I send off the IC Silver Age, I move Dinosaur on my own, voting thanks, talking in greek, I get into potatochopping, I get another article featured, April Fool's Day comes and goes, I spill coffee on my modem, Dinosaur gets featured and I get half credit, I get a "Pantsless Ninjastar", Another n00b gets banned for being a vandal, then comes back, and I get nommed for PotM. A bunch of other stuff happens, but none of it is interesting.

edit New(er) stuffs

edit Asshat

That's what you are. --Tophat headless 22:05, April 28, 2011 (UTC)

Aye, you had to archive it already? --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 22:18, 28 April 2011

Yup, it was over sixty. --Tophat headless 22:22, April 28, 2011 (UTC)
I always wait until it goes past 45, and it has to be before the 19th of every month. --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 22:23, 28 April 2011
And how old did you say Mimo was? Twelve? I assumed he was at least 8. --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 22:24, 28 April 2011
Yup, twelve. --Tophat headless 22:36, April 28, 2011 (UTC)
I always figured Another n00b was younger than Mimo. Another n00b was like Mimo Jr. Until he revealed his dark side and got banned. And I have one more day of being 17 and I celebrate with my new sig. --Chupa chups(talk) 01:05, 1 May 2011
Well... Happy birthday! --Tophat headless 01:24, May 1, 2011 (UTC)
Gee thanks. --Chupa chups(talk) 23:38, 2 May 2011
You're welcome. --Tophat headless 23:44, May 2, 2011 (UTC)

edit If anyone reads this...

Go vote for my article here. Thanks! --Tophat headless 03:59, April 30, 2011 (UTC)

edit Birthday

Thanks for the birthday card. When's your birthday? --Chupa chups(talk) 03:37, 4 May 2011

You're welcome. May twenty-second. --Tophat headless 03:40, May 4, 2011 (UTC)
I'll be sure to make an extra special surprise. How old you turning? --Chupa chups(talk) 03:47, 4 May 2011
One thousand two hundred eighty six. --Tophat headless 03:49, May 4, 2011 (UTC)
That can't be right, I thought that you were only born in 1874. --Chupa chups(talk) 03:51, 4 May 2011
Oh! You meant in earth years! In that case I'm turning one hundred thirty seven. --Tophat headless 03:56, May 4, 2011 (UTC)
I hope I have a feature by then. I think I may redo "Fuck Lyrithya" again. --Chupa chups(talk) 21:17, 4 May 2011
In my experience it usually takes longer than that to get a feature. Even if you nommed it right now. But good luck! --Tophat headless 22:25, May 4, 2011 (UTC)
I hope. Can you help me with this? --Chupa chups(talk) 22:27, 4 May 2011
Yeah, sure. Do you mean help as in co-write, or as in with just one specific thing? --Tophat headless 22:30, May 4, 2011 (UTC)

edit Signpost Un

~ Pointy I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 00:16, 5 May 2011

edit Pee

Thanks for the piss. It was oddly quenching. I've followed your advice (at least, I think I have) and improved it. I will be putting it up for one final piss and then I will move on with my life. Hopefully I'll find Jesus. Or Buddha. I'm not picky. --Username18 KUN FP 23:34, May 5, 2011 (UTC)

Wow! You did a great job! Way to go. Oh! And you're welcome. --Tophat headless 23:48, May 5, 2011 (UTC)

edit I'm on the verge of archiving my needs one more section

If you don't, i'm adding a </font> tag to end the redness of your page. --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 23:33, 7 May 2011

NO!!!! NOT THE REDNESS! ANY THING BUT THE REDNESS!! --Tophat headless 17:26, May 8, 2011 (UTC)

edit The Signpost is delivered to all God-fearing citizens

~ Pointy I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 05:42, 12 May 2011

edit Hi

Hello Magic man,

I was just reading your review of Stupid Cats and thought that I would point out a very bad grammatical error in your review, since this is about the most only useful thing I feel like doing at the moment. In the sentence "Although, I will say that when you guys said the thing about how the stupid cat's mum might eat the stupid cat for it's, "delicious and tender meat" I chuckled.", it should be "its", not "it's" (the article had got it, for once, right). Yes, I know, I must seem like such a likeable person, since I've only talked to you once before, and that was about some grammar stuff in one of your Pee Reviews too. But look at it from the bright side, I used to make that mistake too and have learned the hard way how it should be spelled properly. And of course, there's the possibility that it was just a careless mistake of you and that you already know that it should be "its" and not "it's". In either case, cheers! Schamschi, 20:18, May 12, 2011 (UTC)

Thanks magic man for your review. I appreciate all the informatio and I have taken it to heart. I basically asked for a pee review because im stuck and i need ideas more than whats wrong with grammar. I need an overall concept and I have no idea what it is. I do very much apreciate what you said and agree with 90 percent, however I really really really need some inspiration. :) --ShabiDOO 22:05, May 12, 2011 (UTC)
Schamschi, ah yes, just a typo. But thank you for informing me. Shabidoo, you're welcome. --Tophat headless 00:27, May 13, 2011 (UTC)

edit List of users

Hello M. Man. Magic! I noticed you added Flaming Ace onto the list of users. Would you hate me always if I remove him? He only has 8 edits, and I've been kind of caretaking the list and have added only long-term users who have a substantial or even middling track record. But if the list contained everyone with a small amount of edits who hasn't done something super-crazy, it would be thousands of users long and not serve well as a historical record imnho (as it is now someone can go to the list, find an interesting user, and open themselves up to a great deal of work done by a long term uncyarian). Greetings, and pancakes to you. Aleister 20:11 17-5-'11

Eight edits? I don't know what you're talking about, he has way more than eight. But no, I wouldn't hate you always if you remove him (I'll only hate you for nine years). He's my noob by adoption, so I figured I'd add him. --Tophat headless 20:27, May 17, 2011 (UTC)
P.S. Can I add Lollipop's sockpuppet to the list?
I don't know what I was looking at. He does have more than eight, but not a whole lot more, and he's been gone for a month. That's usually a sign of he-not-coming-back, so in my world of putting users on that list I don't think he's earned it yet, but it's up to you. Hmmmmm, you adopted him, and he's been gone for a month. Did you...smother him with his complimentary noob pillow? And I'd say no, Lollipop's sockpuppet is worse than Flaming Arse or whatever the guys name is. Al sockpuppet of ChiefJusticeD.S.
I don;t have any sockpuppets. What are y'all talking about? --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 20:34, 17 May 2011
I think he'll be coming back; he tends to leave for long periods of time, but he always comes back. However, you might be right, he might not belong on that list. Anyway, I think that Lollipop's sockpuppet has made enough of an impression to be on that list. And Lollipop, the old guy, wasn't he your sockpuppet? --Tophat headless 20:51, May 17, 2011 (UTC)
Oh, him. Yeah, that was back in January. The Oldest User Ever. Read more about the sockpuppet here. --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 22:19, 18 May 2011
I read it, but I wasn't on the list of buddies then... I feel loved. *Tears up* --Tophat headless 00:23, May 19, 2011 (UTC)
Sockpuppets do not belong on that list. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy 00:38, 19 May 2011
Well, what if it's not a sockpuppet? What if it's actually an alternate personality? --Tophat headless 00:43, May 19, 2011 (UTC)
STOP EDIT CONFLICTING ME! --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 00:45, 19 May 2011
Oh, I'm so very... *Edit conflict* I' so very... *Edit conflict* I'm so... *Edit conflict* Oh forget i... *Edit conflict* --Tophat headless 00:49, May 19, 2011 (UTC)

edit UnSignpost

~ Pointy I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 00:07, 19 May 2011

edit Pee Review

I peed on your article fruit. There is teh review. Cat the Colourful (Feed me!) Zzz Sleeping Cat 05:16, 19 May, 2011 (UTC)

Hey thanks, man! I'll see what I can do in the way of making it longer. Anyway, thanks again! --Tophat headless 01:02, May 20, 2011 (UTC)

edit Yeeee

I want to see a magic trick. :| Anything up your sleeve for now?--PoopManPoop 09:41, May 19, 2011 (UTC)

Penn and Teller - Slight of Hand03:21

Penn and Teller - Slight of Hand


--Tophat headless 01:18, May 20, 2011 (UTC)


YEAH! --Tophat headless 01:01, May 20, 2011 (UTC)

*throws a party* 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy 03:45, 20 May 2011
Shame on you! Yay! You are in a very select group, there are only 114 people anywhere who are members of the Hall of Shame. A club to be proud of! Aleister 3:49-5-'11
Wow! What a great party... that sounds like. Now if you guys would only let me in... --Tophat headless 03:51, May 20, 2011 (UTC)

edit Hey

Thanks for the review. The primary subject was supposedly that Stephen Hawking can't tell us any more about our world than religion or Church to be specific. I was going to make edits but was waiting for the Pee Review. Now I will go back to doing just that and working on the central theme and execution of it.Thanks again.--PoopManPoop 11:41, May 20, 2011 (UTC)

Hey man, no problem. It may not have sounded like it, but I do really think it could become a really good article, but it'll take some hard work on your part; are you willing to do the hard work? I sure hope so. --Tophat headless 14:37, May 20, 2011 (UTC)
Hard work I can do, but knowing what hard work to do is what i'm learning. And yeah i know it has potential but i will have to sacrifice some things and just get down to it for it to work. A farewell magic related quote, " What if I rained down all of the worlds' jewels..uh, on your, uh..bah fuck it I will be in touch.PoopManPoop 15:04, May 20, 2011 (UTC)
Alright man, good luck. As for the hard work, just jump in there and do it. Let me tell you a story, I'm a gymnast, it comes with the territory of being a magician and a clown and all that other shit. I started doing gymnastics when I was very young, because I knew I wanted to be a magician and all. Anyway, when I was... oh... about eleven I learned to do a standing back-flip. Right before I did it for the first time on my own, the coach and all the kids on my team were telling me to just go for it, that if I didn't just go for it I'd never learn how to do it. I can see the same thing happening with you, if you never just jump in there and rewrite your article you'll never do it, and you'll never learn. Anyway, bye. --Tophat headless 15:39, May 20, 2011 (UTC)
* Roaring and beating his chest with fists..Yes I will rewrite it. Oh..yes. *panting*--PoopManPoop 16:32, May 20, 2011 (UTC)
Er... good. Now, here's a box of tissues; clean up all that jizz. I can't have that kind of stuff lying around my talkpage, I have standards and shit, ya know! --Tophat headless 03:19, May 21, 2011 (UTC)
A magic man does what a magic man says. Uh, what did you say again? My uncyc pages are fucked so I aint able to do anything on the article. Fuhuck! --PoopManPoop 13:14, May 21, 2011 (UTC)
What's wrong with them? I might be able to help. --Tophat headless 15:04, May 21, 2011 (UTC)
Now they're ok. Apparently a rendering problem. All sorted out. I am on it. Do you have any magic trick in which you could impregnate someone(M or F) and then de-impregnate them in a matter of few minutes, in a crowd?--PoopManPoop 16:51, May 21, 2011 (UTC)
Can you do another one of my reviews?--PoopManPoop 22:28, May 21, 2011 (UTC)
As for your first question, go here and watch the third trick. As for your second, certainly. Just give me the link. --Tophat headless 01:32, May 22, 2011 (UTC)
I want this[1] featured. What can be done to make it feature worthy?--PoopManPoop 09:59, May 22, 2011 (UTC)
Well, it usually takes a lot to get something featured. I usually get my articles pee reviewed twice before I nom them for VFH. But remember that while your article's on VFH, you'll need to take people's suggestions and fix the article accordingly. That's how you get the for votes. --Tophat headless 17:49, May 22, 2011 (UTC)
That's why I am so desperately waiting for your Pee review. I would only submit if the review gives it a good score.PoopManPoop 12:48, May 23, 2011 (UTC)
Well, in that case I might just wait 'till the last second to write it... --Party hat 15:11, May 23, 2011 (UTC)
Please don't do that.I am literally sitting with my arms crosses waiting only for the review of this one. Take you time and shit, but give a feedback keeping VFH in mind.--PoopManPoop 16:38, May 23, 2011 (UTC)
And Happy Birthday man.:)--PoopManPoop 16:43, May 23, 2011 (UTC)
Hey man, I'm joking. I'm in the process of writing it now. --Tophat headless 16:47, May 23, 2011 (UTC)
Yeah me too. :D--PoopManPoop 16:53, May 23, 2011 (UTC)

edit ..

I have put it up in Pee Review. --PoopManPoop 10:29, May 22, 2011 (UTC)

Okay, I just went and claimed it. --Tophat headless 11:18, May 22, 2011 (UTC)
Nice. To the gates then. --PoopManPoop 12:04, May 22, 2011 (UTC)
That de impregnating magic trick was better than what I asked for. well, much better.--PoopManPoop 12:11, May 22, 2011 (UTC)
Also, sorry to be cluttering your talk, but I forgot adding 'quick' to it. :)PoopManPoop 16:18, May 22, 2011 (UTC)

edit My birthday...

It's today. WORSHIP ME!!! --Tophat headless 17:54, May 22, 2011 (UTC)

Ooh la la..To the drinking hole!..--PoopManPoop 18:37, May 22, 2011 (UTC)

edit Happy birthday, Magic man

Magic man birthday card

--Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 18:48, 22 May 2011

Nice card! Happy birthday!!!!! Cake and cookies and gifts and smiling donkeys and ice cream for you! Aleister 15:14 Birthday
Yes, thank you very much Lollipop. I will cherish it forever (and the smiling donkeys too!). --Party hat 15:26, May 23, 2011 (UTC)
Yes. The only difference is that Syndrome didn't draw a penis on it. --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 16:38, 23 May 2011

edit Trumperty-trump

Hi magicman, as you were the 1st person to make pictures for an article of mine, and as they were so awesome, I have imprinted on you and you're now my go-to guy for pics (zombie who?).. Anyway I was wondering if you could do me a couple of new ones for an unnews called 'Donald Trump forced to reveal wig receipt'.. it's kind of annoying (for me not America) that he's not running for president anymore but I think the concept is still promising. I need a picture of a tatty looking receipt (from somewhere called wigwam or wigs r us) and a picture of someone 'caught in a spotlight' (preferably against a brick wall), maybe with a red crosshair targeted on them, with the face of Donald Trump superimposed onto whoever it may be. As he's no longer running for presidency, I'll have to work in some reason for him being victimised but it shouldn't be too hard. Shrooms Jello Shrooms 23:00, May 23, 2011 (UTC)

Yeah, I'll do it. It may take me a little while, but if that doesn't matter to you I'll do it. --Tophat headless 23:12, May 23, 2011 (UTC)
that's fine bro, let's hope the idiot stays in the news somehow Shrooms Jello Shrooms 23:18, May 23, 2011 (UTC)
Here's the first one:
Wigs R Us
Hope that'll work. I'll start working on the second ASAP. --Tophat headless 02:15, May 24, 2011 (UTC)
And here's the other:
Trump wall
Hope you like them. --Tophat headless 03:24, May 24, 2011 (UTC)
Hey sorry it took a while to get back to you about this. Great images, the receipt is perfect for the article and I might keep the 2nd one for a different one...I just think he looks a bit too happy(?) in the 2nd one for this u think u cd graft his head onto the body of say a celebrity being stalked by papparazzi? maybe with a few flashes going off around him and a slightly grumpier face? Don't worry about the brick wall if u don't want (I forget why I specified that). Again, cheers for both, and I shall definitely be using the 2nd pic just not for this one. I have a cunning plan.. Shrooms Jello Shrooms 21:47, May 28, 2011 (UTC)

edit Is it your... Birthday?

If so, fucking good birthday! I would sing to you, but now my mouth is full of cake. Nhahahahahaha. Cat the Colourful (Feed me!) Zzz Sleeping Cat 05:57, 24 May, 2011 (UTC)

It was my birthday on the twenty second. Anyway, thanks! --Tophat headless 14:25, May 24, 2011 (UTC)

edit Thank You

Thanks a lot man that really helped. Like really did. Now i know how to make it funnier. after I do all the edits I will run it through you before getting it up on VFH. And as with the article before, Awesome review. And yeah, I abandoned that article a while ago because there's a news on almost the same idea on the front Unnews page, a good one at that. So I'm waiting for that to blow over before I go ahead and restart editing that one. Anyway, thanks a lot man. Hail the magician.

Q. Who did the Pee Review for your latest article PoopManPoop? A. A wizard did it --PoopManPoop 07:13, May 24, 2011 (UTC)

Hey man, no problem; you're very welcome. Like I said, the article has real potential, and I would love to see where you go with it. As for the other one, I can understand what you mean. One time I started writing an article, and as it turned out, someone had already been working on an article of the same name and similar plot in their userspace for a while. So I know how you feel. But I can see that article going places too. Anyway, good luck! --Tophat headless 14:11, May 24, 2011 (UTC)
I just realised I don't fucking care if anybody has the same idea. Stuff him and transport him to Spain, in a plastic bag for god's sake. I am editing it right now and i will run it through you in a couple of hours. I will make a better one. *Roaring*--PoopManPoop 14:46, May 24, 2011 (UTC)
Er... okay? --Tophat headless 14:47, May 24, 2011 (UTC)
Yeah check this [[2]] out. How do you think it is going?--PoopManPoop 15:12, May 24, 2011 (UTC)
It's looking better. You'll of course have to make it longer. If there's anything I would change it would be the fact that you don't really explain why he took the bone off the toffee wrapper. Maybe you could explain that better? --Tophat headless 15:35, May 24, 2011 (UTC)
yeah maybe i will just leave it at the bone part, and leave what he did with it to his imagination. btw, i put up the article on VFH with the changes you advised me to make. check it out. PoopManPoop 16:19, May 24, 2011 (UTC)


Thanks for voting for the article on VFH man and the awesome magic tricks. *blaring drums* --PoopManPoop 20:45, May 24, 2011 (UTC)

Hey man, you're welcome. It's a good article, it deserves to be featured. Now, for my next trick:
Barry and Stuart - How to Dispose a Corpse02:50

Barry and Stuart - How to Dispose a Corpse


--Tophat headless 21:28, May 24, 2011 (UTC)

edit Phnerb unsignpost

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:13, May 26, 2011 (UTC)

edit Fruit

You gave it a good try. I just read the page again, trying to see what the main problems are in my strange world. With the pic of the balls opening it my immediate thought was why not rename the page "Low-hanging Fruit" (thus bypassing Funnybony's objection of having a real Fruit article) and have the two voices discuss fruits in relation to low-hanging balls, which they like very much. I like your pics, the uploaded ones (good additions to the wiki!!!!) and didn't know those berries weren't actually considered berries (learning something new every minute). But just changing the focus of the page a little (maybe take a few hours or a couple of days away from it, to quell the juices, heh heh) will do the trick. More later, must sign off nows. Aleister 2:03 26-5-'11

Oh, thank you. Finally someone gets specific with me. I'll see what I can do. Thanks again. --Tophat headless 02:06, May 26, 2011 (UTC)

edit Whoever sees this,

go vote for my article here. Thanks. --Tophat headless 02:43, May 26, 2011 (UTC)

Clever. Verrrrrrrrrrrry clever.  Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize  writings  SU&W) 02:48 May 26, 2011
Thank you, thank you. *Bows* --Tophat headless 03:50, May 26, 2011 (UTC)

edit Fruit to Fruits

Hey, Bro! I didn't check to see who was the writer. But its you, dude! You're a great writer. "Fruit" is a real subject, like in Wikipedia, a real subject, and this article doesn't do any justice to the real subject. Therefore it seems not right of you to hog the entire subject with one gay joke. Could THIS be an Unycylopedia article on the subject of fruit? No, of course not. But your gay joke is there, so may I suggest a simple way to fix it? Please? Okay, why not simply rename it "Fruits", perhaps rearrange the first picture and show an apple or something more subtle than balls as the starter picture, maybe an apple with a bite out. Please add a few more gay-fruits jokes to make it longer and have more fun. Then reNom as "FRUITS", with more subtle pics and more jokes. That way you are not wrongly userping the entire subject of Fruit, which is, ah, about fruit - you know! That's just my suggestion and I hope it helps. I really do care. Cheers!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 05:11, May 26

That`s good idea. Cat the Colourful (Feed me!) Zzz Sleeping Cat 05:13, 26 May, 2011 (UTC)
Oh my god is that a great idea! You're awesome, man. Also, no one's ever called me a great writer before, so thanks for that and all the other advice. I'll go do that. --Tophat headless 15:20, May 26, 2011 (UTC)
Yes you are. And uh yeah, I second Funnybony. It's not really about..fruit, you know. --Wiggly pFiry mWiggly p -> That's Poop Man Poop 15:36, May 26, 2011 (UTC)
Yeah... --Tophat headless 15:51, May 26, 2011 (UTC)
 :) BTW the evidence disposing video was awesome..--Wiggly pFiry mWiggly p -> That's Poop Man Poop 21:26, May 26, 2011 (UTC)
I know. Those guys are great. In case you were wondering, neither of those guys (Barry and Stuart) were me, but man do I wish... --Tophat headless 21:31, May 26, 2011 (UTC)
Yeah me too. But you know what they say, a plastic surgery a day keeps these kinda worries away.--Wiggly pFiry mWiggly p -> That's Poop Man Poop 21:44, May 26, 2011 (UTC)
Yeah, but than I wouldn't be them, I'd just look like them. --Tophat headless 21:49, May 26, 2011 (UTC)
Nice feedback. Maybe you can still use the term "low-hanging fruit" in the caption to the balls pic. And I've got an article on...dare I say it?, never mind. I'll go about my business now. Al 23:03 26-5-'11
Okay, I'm done rewriting it now, and I made sure that I used the term "low-hanging fruit". Go take a look. --Tophat headless 01:01, May 27, 2011 (UTC)
Hey, bro, time for some more magic. At the onset you speak of your friend so better start with a picture of two fruits, side by side. Then introduce each fruit as one of your friends (with differing qualities). And please don't double space the text links. Perhaps a darker pink. And remember to list every possible exotic fruit with associated actual knowledge of the real fruit but giving a gay context to its texture, taste and how it is eaten. Fruits like Mango, Jack Fruit (oi!), Custard Apple, Passion Fruit, Grapes, Duriun, and not to forget Cum-quat. Some fruits are sucked, some are licked, etc., tell about how they are taken. If you single space it, darken the color, and compare each fruit with your friends and their qualities, then it will force a more complete and longer article. Please look up "exotic fruits", get the list, and have a ball making comparisons. You might even want to rename the article as "Exotic Fruits" (hehe). Also I think actually showing a human in any of the pictures spoils the joke, better just show pictures of all exotic fruits; and you could also be a talking fruit (of some sort, like Jack Fruit) who is author of this article on fruit friends. Let me know if I can help any more. I'm glad to. Cheers!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 06:09, May 27
I'm sorry, but I don't completely understand. I know, I'm an idiot, but will you please try to explain for me? Thanks. --Tophat headless 04:12, May 28, 2011 (UTC)
Innuendo? 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy 07:31, 28 May 2011

edit Fruits

I must say in its current form I seem to get it, and it is clever. I am still a bit hung up on dialog qua dialog, but that may just be my own deal. It's shaped up into almost a "men on film" type of presentation. I am not sure I got that before. I instantly see the concept as is. --K evillips эвилипс MUN,CM,NS,3of7 22:47, May 26, 2011 (UTC)

Thanks, man! Why don't you go take a look at it now? It's a whole lot better. --Tophat headless 00:54, May 27, 2011 (UTC)

edit my name is fat roger and i am going to die soon of diabetes

goodbye forever FatRoger 21:48, May 28, 2011 (UTC)

Hmm... if that is true I'm very sorry. But I get the felling it isn't... *Shifty eyes* --Tophat headless 21:49, May 28, 2011 (UTC)

edit The UnSignpost: Best before Friday!

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:10, June 2, 2011 (UTC)

edit I'm awarding myself an UN:REQ award.

And no one can stop me.

Thumbs up2

This user created Uncyclopedia:What VFD is not, an article originally requested on Uncyclopedia:Requested Articles. Good for them us!
(If awarding yourself please update the award statistics)

Suck on that, bitches! --Tophat headless 01:53, June 3, 2011 (UTC)

You just think you can get away with anything on your talk page, don't you.  Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize  writings  SU&W) 01:55 Jun 03, 2011
FAIL. Even i'm not that stupid. --Maple leaf >> Hello, my name is Sir Lollipop, and I am Canadian! 01:58, 3 June 2011
Well... you must understand I'm drunk, so my judgement is clouded. The only reason this message doesn't have a million typos is because my computer has a spell and grammar checker. --Tophat headless 02:08, June 3, 2011 (UTC)
I assume you're not the only one drunk. The admins are playing Ban Tag. --Maple leaf >> Hello, my name is Sir Lollipop, and I am Canadian! 02:17, 3 June 2011
Let's play real tag! Just you and me! Tag! You're it! --Tophat headless 02:23, June 3, 2011 (UTC)
Ugh... *Chases Magic man* --Maple leaf >> Hello, my name is Sir Lollipop, and I am Canadian! 02:32, 3 June 2011
*Trips and falls into wood chipper* --Tophat headless 02:44, June 3, 2011 (UTC)
..*Takes multiple pictures of Magic man falling into a wood chipper*. --Maple leaf >> Hello, my name is Sir Lollipop, and I am Canadian! 02:46, 3 June 2011
*Pulls Lollipop's camera in with me* --Tophat headless 02:53, June 3, 2011 (UTC)

edit Magic man indeed

Thanks, man! --Tophat headless 02:38, June 3, 2011 (UTC)

edit Never mind me, I'm just resting for a moment


Yeah, hi. Whew! This thing is heavy. Mind if I rest here for a few minutes before starting up again? Thanks. Let me catch my breath. How've you been? Good! Glad to hear it. Hey, thanks for the offer of soda and pizza, but nah, I really should get this thing moving. "Catch ya later, alligator", as mum used to say before the alligator ate her. Well, back on the road. Aleister 3-6-'11

I meant to vote against, I really did, I just never got around to it. --Tophat headless 02:35, June 4, 2011 (UTC)
What? I didn't hear you, too much noise in here of templates moving around. Like a warehouse full of crickets all seeking mates. You said you "Mint two float August, eye eelily dude, eye huffed Trevor snot aground thru Mitt"? Some kind of foreign language? It's hard to make out the words. Al 11:20 4-6-'11

I poked a skunk once. It was like heaven in a jar.

You can have your fun, feel free to wave that template around in my face as much as you want, it was better, I will give you that. But anyway, I really was going to vote against, I was in the middle of voting against, in fact. But someone called me on the phone and my window got closed somehow, so I just never did it. Even if I had voted against, it would've been featured anyway. --Tophat headless 13:08, June 4, 2011 (UTC)
OK, I had my fun, and I thought it was a running joke between us. I'd bring up the page once in awhile, and you'd shoot it down, etc. Anyway, I did work on it with you in mind, and improved it enough I was hoping it would pass your vote. I take criticism seriously., and welcome it when it's either honest or fun. I thought it had enough changes and improvements to nom again, that also with you in mind. I take running jokes seriously, so by that you helped improve it greatly. Thanks! /leaves cart here and runs away with template in a cab Aleister 18:07 4-6-'11
It is a running joke between us. But to be honest, it would've been a weak against. The only things that were wrong with it, in my opinion is the fact that the first half is written like a Wikipedia article, but the second half is a story about someone falling in love with a skunk. Also, the idea of raping small woodland animals makes me cringe more than laugh. --Tophat headless 18:29, June 4, 2011 (UTC)
It is kind of creepy to rape woodland animals. Got a point there for sure. But she probably escapes at the end, so at least she's free again. When the guy starts writing the page he is in love with a skunk but thinks he is busy writing an encylopeic article in honour of her. He then finds that he can't describe a skunk's looks without gushing and then telling about his love. He tells his story, and then tries to get back to the encyclopedic story in the last two sections, but fails again when she runs away. That's the "structure" of the page. Not greatly funny, but maybe stretches the envolope enough so it balances-out a little that way. I'm glad we didn't analyze it earlier, as I may have pulled back on the concept and this way it played out without me hesitating about it. Aleister 19:09 4-6-'11
Hmm... I see... Well if that is the concept than it's not that obvious, to me at least. Anyway, congratulations on the feature. --Tophat headless 19:17, June 4, 2011 (UTC)
Thanks. Maybe we be done with this page now, and since the Skunk escaped, all's well that ends dull. (unsigned edit by a low-down critter seeking lonely badgers now)

edit Thanks

Later. Thanks for letting me rest my burden on your page for a few minutes. Aleister 19:07 3-6-'11

No problem. --Tophat headless 02:36, June 4, 2011 (UTC)

edit Congratulations!

With 497 plusses, you have reached the coveted rank of Grue Army High General. You can now sit back and force other members to do the work for you. 1 last thing: You also have no life to get this far. Cheers! --Revolutionary, Anti-Bensonist, and TYATU Boss Uncyclopedian Meganew (Chat) (Care for a peek at my work?) (SUCK IT, FROGGY!) 21:20, June 4, 2011 (UTC)

Wow! Thanks! Now I'm off, to have no life! --Tophat headless 21:38, June 4, 2011 (UTC)
What about me? Aren't I any good? --Maple leaf >> Hello, my name is Sir Lollipop, and I am Canadian! 21:40, 4 June 2011
You're a champ. --Tophat headless 15:56, June 6, 2011 (UTC)

edit Pee Review

Isn't it coincidental how the title "Pee Review" is a bad pun itself?--White Toaster Talk - Contributions 00:40, June 5, 2011 (UTC)

Hey, thanks, man! I'll start working on it now. --Tophat headless 02:48, June 5, 2011 (UTC)

edit Image of the Year

Hey Magic Maaaaaaaaaaaaaan. Do you think you could make some badges for the winners of the "Unimage of the Year 2010" competition. I need a 1st, 2nd and 3rd badge :) Let me know if you can. Cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeers --ShabiDOO 02:45, June 5, 2011 (UTC)

Yeah, I'll do it. --Tophat headless 02:47, June 5, 2011 (UTC)
HURAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! Magic man! Magic man! Rah rah rah! Wuff wuff wuff! --ShabiDOO 03:34, June 5, 2011 (UTC)
^^Lol--Wiggly pFiry mWiggly p -> That's Poop Man Poop 01:51, June 7, 2011 (UTC)

edit Oh sorry!

My apologies I was going back to correct it when I saw em already corrected..Thanks for keeping my back..or just keeping the page clean..or whatever..Magic trick please!--Wiggly pFiry mWiggly p -> That's Poop Man Poop 01:44, June 7, 2011 (UTC)

Oh, no need to apologize! You didn't know. But thank you for realizing your mistake and going back to try to correct it. Anyway, cheers! --Tophat headless 01:47, June 7, 2011 (UTC)
D Yeah I actually corrected one too..but left the two hyphens which you had to clean up..So not really. :D Whats up Magic Man why so serious?--Wiggly pFiry mWiggly p -> That's Poop Man Poop 01:52, June 7, 2011 (UTC)
Nothing's up with me. I'm just listening to Elton John's version of Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds.
Elton John - Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds (Captain Fantastic 11 of 13)06:19

Elton John - Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds (Captain Fantastic 11 of 13)


Awesome, isn't it?
I'm also getting ready to get on IRC, re-nom Visual puns for pee-review and crop this image. What about you? --Tophat headless 02:04, June 7, 2011 (UTC)

edit I Approve

The changes you made to Visual Puns are great. It made a lot more sense to change the title, and the added visual puns were great. The "history of visual puns" picture was especially funny. I think it's a lot funnier now, though, I'd like to give you a bit of advice.


--White Toaster Talk - Contributions 04:18, June 7, 2011 (UTC)

Ha! A bit of advice! That's great, man. Thanks for all your help and compliments on this article. I'll see what I can do in the way of adding pictures. Thanks again. --Tophat headless 14:08, June 7, 2011 (UTC)

edit Nom

Thanks for the nom, it's an honor just to be nominated. --K evillips эвилипс MUN,CM,NS,3of7 17:09, June 8, 2011 (UTC)

You're welcome. You deserve it, man. --Tophat headless 17:10, June 8, 2011 (UTC)
So is there any campaign spending limits in place, or guidelines about yard sign placement near polling places, I need to be aware of? --K evillips эвилипс MUN,CM,NS,3of7 18:44, June 8, 2011 (UTC)
Aren't you a magician? Can you not divine it for yourself? 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy 03:44, 9 June 2011
It's always polite to inquire. --K evillips эвилипс MUN,CM,NS,3of7 04:23, June 9, 2011 (UTC)
The spending limit is somewhere between fifty and seventy-five cents, and you cant place yard signs within forty-five thousand miles of a polling place. --Tophat headless 05:09, June 9, 2011 (UTC)
My bad, the PAC already spent $0.78 on yard signs, now to get them to the asteroid belt on negative 4 cents. --K evillips эвилипс MUN,CM,NS,3of7 05:22, June 9, 2011 (UTC)
Magic might do it. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy 23:11, 9 June 2011
When you say "Magic might do it." Do you mean Magic as in me? Or actual magic? Because I can't be bothered. --Tophat headless 02:26, June 10, 2011 (UTC)
Perhaps a wizard can do it. Oh...oh, looks like he already did. --Maple leaf >> Hello, my name is Sir Lollipop, and I am Canadian! 02:28, 10 June 2011
Pilot - Magic - You Tube Exclusive! - IN STEREO03:09

Pilot - Magic - You Tube Exclusive! - IN STEREO


--Tophat headless 16:15, June 10, 2011 (UTC)
Oh oh oh woke up today feeling the way I always do... --Maple leaf >> Hello, my name is Sir Lollipop, and I am Canadian! 19:49, 10 June 2011
Oh god no... --Tophat headless 02:28, June 11, 2011 (UTC)
If anyone says "Oh" again,i'll add a </div> to this page to take away its redness. --Maple leaf >> Hello, my name is Sir Lollipop, and I am Canadian! 02:30, 11 June 2011
Oh don't do that. --Tophat headless 02:34, June 11, 2011 (UTC)
Oh, don't worry, the only redness you'll have is from my sig. --Maple leaf >> Hello, my name is Sir Lollipop, and I am Canadian! 02:37, 11 June 2011
Oh darn. You put a </div> tag on my talk page. It's not like I can edit it out or anything. --Tophat headless 02:41, June 11, 2011 (UTC)
That is sadly not the worst I can do. --Maple leaf >> Hello, my name is Sir Lollipop, and I am Canadian! 02:43, 11 June 2011
You seem to keep forgetting that I have the power to edit. --Tophat headless 02:48, June 11, 2011 (UTC)
That time it took you longer to edit. But now I have a harder task for you. --Maple leaf >> Hello, my name is Sir Lollipop, and I am Canadian! 03:24, 11 June 2011
I can do this all night, baby. --Tophat headless 03:27, June 11, 2011 (UTC)
It dosen't work with you. It only works with someone who's talkpage is at the brink of archiving. Why by chance is not me. --Maple leaf >> Hello, my name is Sir Lollipop, and I am Canadian! 03:29, 11 June 2011
Yes, now stop uglying up my talkpage, goddammit! --Tophat headless 03:32, June 11, 2011 (UTC)
Ha ha ha! I just changed my sig back to purple, so now you have less red! Moohahaha! --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 21:03, 11 June 2011
Well I had Europe send a comet chaser rocket to place a yard sign on that comet, but the vote will probably be over by then. I had the Little Prince endorse me on his tiny pluton. How var away is the moon, can I get Barbara Bain to endorse me on Space 1999? --K evillips эвилипс MUN,CM,NS,3of7 00:42, June 12, 2011 (UTC)

edit Hurrah, it's the UnSignpost!

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:13, June 9, 2011 (UTC)

edit any chance of

a slightly more shocked looking Donald Trump pic? I did mention it above but maybe you missed it.. either that or you're ENRAGED at my temerity to ask for a new one :D Shrooms Jello Shrooms 21:01, June 11, 2011 (UTC)

Trump wall2
Sorry, it's not very good. --Tophat headless 23:35, June 11, 2011 (UTC)
ahahhahah No but it's hilarious, I think I mentioned (if you scroll up) that the brick wall was irrelevant and I don't know why I asked for it in the first place. I may have to base an entire article around this image though because it's so fucking funny. Shrooms Jello Shrooms 16:48, June 14, 2011 (UTC)
The Cars - "Magic" video (full version)04:08

The Cars - "Magic" video (full version)


This is my magic theme --K evillips эвилипс MUN,CM,NS,3of7 00:44, June 12, 2011 (UTC)

this is fucking hilarious, it looks like an emaciated kevin bacon tripping on acid in a mental home. I don't encounter enough videos that make me say 'what the faaaack?' Shrooms Jello Shrooms 16:54, June 14, 2011 (UTC)
So were the 80's conceopt videos. The Cars' videos were all pretty weird and their front man Ric Ocasic was funny enough to look at.--K evillips эвилипс MUN,CM,NS,3of7 17:57, June 14, 2011 (UTC)

edit VFH

There's only one thing I want to say.


</div> --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 02:28, 12 June 2011

Look, please don't get angry. Take it as a compliment that I want to help you with your article. I'm not saying it'll never be ready, I'm just saying not until you make some changes. --Tophat headless 02:40, June 12, 2011 (UTC)
I wasn't the one that nommed it for VFH. And I uploaded three pictures for the article, only one is there. --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 02:52, 12 June 2011
Why not add the others? --Tophat headless 03:36, June 12, 2011 (UTC)
Self noms only work if you get a pee review. Can you review them? --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 03:37, 12 June 2011
That article? --Tophat headless 03:38, June 12, 2011 (UTC)
Which one? Which one? --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 03:42, 12 June 2011
Oooooooooooooh! When I said "Why not add the others?" I was referring to adding the other images to the article, not noming all your articles for VFH. Sorry, miscommunication. --Tophat headless 05:14, June 12, 2011 (UTC)

edit Inbox

Want to help with that one? We'd love to have you. I've put some ideas on the talkpage. Lyrithya has agreed to do the formatting! --Black Flamingo 19:46, June 14, 2011 (UTC)

Yes. I'd love to help. Thanks. --Tophat headless 23:29, June 16, 2011 (UTC)

edit UnSignpost Activate!

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:11, June 16, 2011 (UTC)

edit If you put a tag on a review or otherwise promise to review it, please only do so when you start the review.

Now, computer trouble is one thing, and it happens to the best of us, but that happened after you forgot to review the article the first time you said you'd review it and then again said you'd do it. So please, if you say you're going to do a review, do it, and do it then. If something comes up and you can't, just cancel it, don't keep stringing the person who requested it along with further promises that prove just as empty. It's really not very nice to the other fellow.

If this happens again, I may just ban you. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy 04:44, 17 June 2011

Yes. If I were you I would've just banned me this time. But thank you for having some leniency on this occasion. This really isn't the kind of thing I should be doing as a member of peeing and all. I apologize, and it won't happen again. --Tophat headless 13:26, June 17, 2011 (UTC)

Hey man...thats a pretty minimal apooogy. Yoou havent said what you will do for pentance. Im thinking something big. I have something fair but diabolical in mind. ShabiDOO 03:52, June 20, 2011 (UTC)
Well after writing that I went and wrote the review. But if you'd like I'll also jump in a bucket full of ice water naked. --Tophat headless 03:56, June 20, 2011 (UTC)

edit It's a thank you template with red letters, right?


You might not get in Heaven like I said but you will have some virtual tits and beer as a reward for voting for my article. Enjoy. --Mimo&Maxus (Talk) 09:35, June 19, 2011 (UTC)

Hey, man, no problem. It always deserved to be featured. It's a shame it was featured the first time, though. Anyway, congrats! --Tophat headless 17:14, June 19, 2011 (UTC)

edit Your features

Benny hinn 2

An Uncy admin casually banning vandal IPs.


Ah-HA!! So you're the one who wrote that UnNews that got 1st place in May and prevented my glorious article, Heaven's Gate, to take the top spot! I shall remember you! Snowflake mini Mattsnow 16:25, June 19, 2011 (UTC) PS Lol, your article was very good, I read it after you won!

Hey, thanks, man. I'm glad you liked my article. I read Heaven's Gate, I loved it. Anyway, congrats on the second spot, that's better than I did with my first feature (check it's VFH entry. It only just had enough to get featured, with all the against votes). I'll remember you, too. --Tophat headless 17:12, June 19, 2011 (UTC)
I've got one right now on VFH, I think that is one of the best thing I wrote so far: UnNews:Boston wins Stanley Cup while sore losers destroy their city. You really hit it home with UnNews:Old people more likely to die, study shows. Sometimes, the stars align in great ways, while other times, you just stare at the PC screen like a vegetable XD Snowflake mini Mattsnow 17:46, June 19, 2011 (UTC)
I'll go look at it. --Tophat headless 18:35, June 19, 2011 (UTC)
Hahaha!!! I've just read UnBooks:Let's take a walk in the city!! It's pretty awesome! It reminds me of an article by Mimo about his homework being late. I would have voted for it, it is very good and original. The voting took place over a month lol. But you got to admit, after you get one feature, you realize afterwards that it's kind of unsignificant: I mean, who remembers what was featured a week ago? Later! Snowflake mini Mattsnow 02:40, June 20, 2011 (UTC)
HowTo:Get your candy back off that baby was featured a week ago (but I only know that because I looked). And you're right, it really is insignificant. In all honesty, before I got my first feature, I wrote to get a feature. Now I just do it for the love of writing (and I really do love writing). --Tophat headless 02:44, June 20, 2011 (UTC)
I read it, I liked it a lot, I voted for. You're right about that bro. Snowflake mini Mattsnow 02:51, June 20, 2011 (UTC)
Well thanks. By the way, great gif. --Tophat headless 03:24, June 20, 2011 (UTC)

edit I just realized...

I've wasted a year of my life on Uncyclopedia as of yesterday. Congratulations, guys; that's a year I'll never get back. --Tophat headless 23:42, June 21, 2011 (UTC)

It's your UnBirthday!

A very merry unbirthday to you, to you

A very merry unbirthday to you, to you

It's great to drink to someone

And I guess that you will do

A very merry unbirthday to you

A very merry unbirthday to us, to us

A very merry unbirthday to us

If there are no objections

Let it be unanimous

A very merry unbirthday to us

A very merry unbirthday to me (to who)

A very merry unbirthday to me (to you)

Let's all congratulate me

With a present I agree

A very merry unbirthday to me

A very merry unbirthday to all, to all

A very merry unbirthday to all, to all

Let's have a celebration

Hire a band and rent a hall

A very merry unbirthday

A very merry unbirthday

A very merry unbirthday to all! --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 23:51, 21 June 2011

Lovely... --Tophat headless 23:57, June 21, 2011 (UTC)
Want some Lollicake? Or as Shabidoo calls it, Lolicake. --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 00:02, 22 June 2011
Dear Magic man. I cannot even begin to express how much I will miss you. How can I even start to count all of the things you have done for me. Like the happy monkey banner you made that the admins refused to put up. Or...those barnstars for the unimage of the year that told the second place, just how much they failed. And that recent underline, too are now underlined on my own list in my heart. Your year here was special, and we will all miss you verry much. Thanks for participating and dont forget us!!! With tears in my eyes and lots of love. --ShabiDOO 00:06, June 22, 2011 (UTC)
Wait, he's leaving? --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 00:08, 22 June 2011
Yes Lolli...I know its hard...and we will always remember him, but his year is up. Lets hold each others hands as he walks away. One step at a time. Wave! --ShabiDOO 00:15, June 22, 2011 (UTC)
What? I'm not leaving. The whole "year I'll never get back" thing was a joke. I love you guys, and I won't be leaving for a long time. I can barely stay away from Uncyclopedia without having withdraws. You'd have to drag me away from this place kicking and screaming. I reiterate: you'd have to kill me (or ban me) to keep me away from this place for long. But I'm glad that someone would care if I left; just another reason I won't be leaving soon, I wouldn't want to upset anyone (especially you, Shabidoo). Thanks for caring. And yes, Lollipop, I'd love some Lollicake. --Tophat headless 00:18, June 22, 2011 (UTC)

Lollicake There's your Lollicake --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 00:22, 22 June 2011

Yay! --Tophat headless 00:23, June 22, 2011 (UTC)
I know you are just saying that to make us feel better. Its okay, we prepared ourselves. I called you a cab 5 minutes ago, and the flight I bought you to Somalia was pricy at last minute rates, so don't turn back now. you are making this hard on us MagicMan. I don't want to say goodbye again --ShabiDOO 00:34, June 22, 2011 (UTC)
Well alright then. *Leaves* --Tophat headless 00:36, June 22, 2011 (UTC)
Dammit, Shabidoo!, i'm leaving too! *Leaves* --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 00:38, 22 June 2011
Not that I'm back, or anything, cause I'm not. But if I was, I'd leave again, Shabidoo. --Tophat headless 00:54, June 22, 2011 (UTC)
Bye Lolli. :) --ShabiDOO 00:58, June 22, 2011 (UTC)
Naw, I can't leave now. I'll leave when I get a feature. --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 01:32, 22 June 2011
Yeah...and with magic man helping me...YET again...mmm...can't let him go. I asked the pilot to return to fill in US state and told him to throw magic man out (with a chute if he can remember) before the hijacking. --ShabiDOO 01:59, June 22, 2011 (UTC)

edit Visual puns

Hey Magic Man, I never got a chance to vote on Visual puns--I read it yesterday, and thought it was a pretty pun-ny article. I was going to read it again and vote for it today, but it's already been queued. Sorry I didn't vote on it before--I should probably be pun-ished for not doing so. So I guess consider this message a spiritual for vote. Yeah. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 14:56, June 22, 2011 (UTC)

Hey, man, no worry's. I'm just happy I made someone smile. When I send out my thank you messages I'll send one to you. --Tophat headless 16:24, June 22, 2011 (UTC)
Hey...I meant to vote for it. And I did vote for it. And thats what happened. --ShabiDOO 16:56, June 22, 2011 (UTC)
That was awesome, seriously! I've been here for 2 months and that was the most original! Awesome. Snowflake mini Mattsnow 17:54, June 22, 2011 (UTC)
Thanks, man! Go take a look at the featured template. I messed with it. --Tophat headless 17:57, June 22, 2011 (UTC)
Yeah, art and red, great! I also read the whole VFH of your first feature, quite a lot of drama! Continue to expend the visual puns if you find other things, one of the best thing is the "con tents" and the various edits button. I went on the edit screen and everything looked like jibberish to me, is there a place that would be like a template 101 course here? I had 2 features this month, but I am 100% sure you'll win the 1st spot for this month! Snowflake mini Mattsnow 22:00, June 22, 2011 (UTC)
Luckily, I got a chance to vote Symbol for vote For. it. --Purple mini lolly Lollipop Purple mini lolly - CONTRIBS - WRITINGS - SHOP - Now adopting! - 22:06, 22 June 2011
Really? You liked the whole edit button gag? When I added it I thought, "Oh god, this may actually lower the quality of the article." But I'm glad it went over well. I was actually a little upset when I moved it from bad puns to visual puns, because then I couldn't say how much I love a good bad pun (which in my opinion was a big part of the joke). Anyway, if you want to see the full extent of the drama for UnBooks:Let's take a walk in the city!, then read the talk page. Skinfan13 said it should've been dropped to a quasi feature. As for the template thing, in this instance, I just added this: __NOEDITSECTION__ to the top of the article (which makes the edit buttons go away). Then added this code over every section (I've changed it so you'll know where everything goes):

<span class="stealthexternallink"><span style="float:right;margin-left:5px"><div style="font-size: 100%;">[ <span title="Edit section: Whatever you want the button to say instead of "edit"">{{popupImage|image=Whatever image you want to pop up|height=Whatever hight you want the image to be|width=Whatever width you want the image to be|link=Whatever you want the image to link to|alt=Whatever you want it to say when someone rolls over the image|Also whatever you want the button to say instead of "edit"}}</span>]</div></span></span>

But you can also take a look here, here and just about anything here and here. As for the second one (Uncyclopedia:How To Get Started Editing), I know you don't really need to "get started" editing, you already have. But it's still really helpful. --Tophat headless 23:14, June 22, 2011 (UTC)
Thanks, I sure will! I just submitted one on VFH, Boston Molasses Disaster. The pee review I got was the most unhelpful ever, the link is in the comments of the nom. I wasn't about to wait another goddamn month for another pee review, so I put it for vote. In a sense, this gives you a better idea than a Pee Review, and it's faster. Go there and tell me if you like it if you have the time. (I hate to whore, but since I am here...) Snowflake mini Mattsnow 00:07, June 23, 2011 (UTC)

That was an extra-ordinary quick landslide land slide for visual puns. A task well done and well rewarded. As I bugger the skunk she and I applaud you. Aleister 1:19 23-6-'11

Mattsnow, I'll go take a look. But I'm sure it'll be good. Aleister, I know! Eighteen?! That's unheard of in this day in age! --Tophat headless 02:01, June 23, 2011 (UTC)

edit Catch it. Kill it. Bin it. It's the UnSignpost!

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:11, June 23, 2011 (UTC)

edit You wrote, nommed and voted for visual puns, which got featured!

Army Tank U

--Tophat headless 01:57, June 23, 2011 (UTC)

edit Boy!

Your visual puns page is really good. I'm sorry I didn't vote for it. It was because I wasn't here. I swear that If I knew there was a page like this one I would definetly nom it. Anyway, congratulations. --Mimo&Maxus (Talk) 08:55, June 23, 2011 (UTC)

Thanks, dude. You don't have to apologize for not voting, it certainly had enough votes as it was. Anyway, thanks again, and um... you misspelled definitely. --Tophat headless 14:07, June 23, 2011 (UTC)
uh? --Mimo&Maxus (Talk) 14:37, June 23, 2011 (UTC)
Eh? --Tophat headless 14:49, June 23, 2011 (UTC)
Oh... --Mimo&Maxus (Talk) 15:01, June 23, 2011 (UTC)
Ah... --Tophat headless 15:18, June 23, 2011 (UTC)
Look! --Mimo&Maxus (Talk) 19:40, June 23, 2011 (UTC)

edit Visual apologies

Sorry I missed that, my computer's been broke, and still is, actually. Rest assured it would have been a for vote had I got the chance though. Congratulations on another feature. --Black Flamingo 19:12, June 23, 2011 (UTC)

Yeah sure. Quit copying me Black Flamingo, that will never make you look awesome like me. --Mimo&Maxus (Talk) 19:38, June 23, 2011 (UTC)
Actually, Mimo, if you look up a bit you'll see that Guildy was the first to apologize for not voting. Anyway, Black flamingo, thanks for the congrats, and don't worry about the voting thing, You reviewed it, that's more than enough. --Tophat headless 21:06, June 23, 2011 (UTC)

edit Same thing as above

A very Well Donewell done article. Congrats on the feature and sorry I didn't see it on the VFH queue or I would've voted for it. ~ Humbuck Talk 22:51, 23 June 2011 (UTC)

Wow! It seems like everybody liked my article. Even though you didn't vote, thanks! It makes me happy to know that people actually like my writing. Oh, and by the way, good pun! --Tophat headless 23:02, June 23, 2011 (UTC)
I hated it, something about how it contains puns. I hate puns. Horrible despicable things...
There, see? Not everyone likes it. That will be $30. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy 03:16, 24 June 2011
Yeah, but you don't count. You're Lyrithya, not a person. Also, you've disliked everything I've written so far anyway, so... bleh. --Tophat headless 03:18, June 24, 2011 (UTC)
I'm sorry. It's just not the sort of thing I like for some reason. You're a lovely guy, but we apparently have rather different tastes. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy 03:34, 24 June 2011
No need to apologize! I'm not actually angry at you, or anything. I was just joking with all that. I can't see how anyone could get angry at anyone for disliking their article, it's the person's opinion, they can't change it! If you had the choice to like the article I'm sure you would (or at least I hope. Unless you actually like disliking my article. But in this case I'll just assume...). I'm sure you've heard the saying that opinions are like assholes, everyone has one. But I bet you've never heard the end of that little proverb. The end says, "Except for Magic man, who got his surgically removed (both his asshole, and his opinions)." --Tophat headless 03:49, June 24, 2011 (UTC)
An alarming number of folks here would be annoyed. They seem to care. A lot. It's somewhat unsettling. On the other hand, if only there was a way to harness that caring, perhaps we'd have a new and cleaner way to power the site... what do you think? Doable? 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy 03:54, 24 June 2011
Yes... But how would we do that? Magic, perhaps? --Tophat headless 04:27, June 24, 2011 (UTC)
Why not? You are a magic man, after all. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy 04:32, 24 June 2011
Exactly! Now just let me get back you you in four to eight weeks. --Tophat headless 05:46, June 24, 2011 (UTC)

edit The Un-Sigh-npost!

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:12, June 30, 2011 (UTC)

edit Apparently you won

Pee reviewer of the month award Reviewer of the Month June 2011

Good job, man, and well-earned... now keep it up. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy 03:38, 2 July 2011

Thanks! And I will. --Tophat headless 03:50, July 2, 2011 (UTC)
Brble brble brble brble!!! Seriousely!!! --ShabiDOO 03:54, July 2, 2011 (UTC)
NO!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!!??? --Tophat headless 04:03, July 2, 2011 (UTC)

edit Kazaam

You make me feel
you make me feel
you make me feel
like a winner, thanks.
--K evillips эвилипс MUN,CM,NS,3of7 20:24, July 2, 2011 (UTC)

Are you talking about MotM? If so, you're welcome. --Tophat headless 20:29, July 2, 2011 (UTC)
If you have some other things that could make me feel like a winner, we can discuss. But yes MotM. --K evillips эвилипс MUN,CM,NS,3of7 20:42, July 2, 2011 (UTC)
Oh. then yeah, you're welcome. --Tophat headless 00:24, July 7, 2011 (UTC)

edit It's free and it always will be; it's the UnSignpost!

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:11, July 7, 2011 (UTC)

edit Hippopotamus

Hey, yeah, i would like a bit of help with the "Hippopotamus" article. The preceding unsigned comment was added by Blahguy69 (talk • contribs)

Ah! Good! I was hoping you'd say that! So let's get right down to business. As you may or may not know, you have one week to improve your article before that ICU I slapped on your article expires, and that baby goes bye-bye (I apologize if I'm coming off as rude). But there's hope! Every time someone edits the article the clock resets. So I would suggest that you read this and this, if you haven't already. I'll make some edits to the article so the clock will reset. Tell me after you've read those things I told you to read (and read them all, maybe even more than once, don't just skim through them). Again, if I'm coming off as a jerk, or bossy, I apologize, it's just I've had articles with ICUs on them before and I know how quickly the time provided goes by. Also, don't forget to sign your posts. --Tophat headless 04:04, July 9, 2011 (UTC)

edit Magic Man

Umm...we dont really know each other that well...but we are there for each other? Right? really running super late for a date! Can you lend me 30 minutes? I really want to be there on time. As well...could you lend me 20 bucks? I really could use 20 bucks to have a nice date. Well...whatever man...just let me know what you think. Okay? Okay Magic Man dude?!?!?!?! Let me know!? --ShabiDOO 01:54, July 10, 2011 (UTC)

Um... yeah. Here's twenty bucks: $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ And here's thirty minutes: minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute minute. Hope it helps. --Tophat headless 03:22, July 10, 2011 (UTC)

edit Your quotes

are bugging me. Did you just miss the end quote in "TRAP... ? Or was it supposed to have a beginning quote in the first place, making it more like TRAP..." ? I must know.  Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize  writings  SU&W) 05:53 Jul 10, 2011

Oh, sorry I never saw this. Anyway, yeah, it was just a mistake. I fixed it. --Tophat headless 22:52, July 12, 2011 (UTC)

edit The UnSignpost: Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger!

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:11, July 14, 2011 (UTC)

edit Hey, man

Hey there Mr. Magic Man. I have just came to your disscussion page to tell you that I'm sorry for taking full credit of that Barack-Chuckey picture, which was used to be nominated. Next time when I decide to promote my pic, I promise to give you credit that you so rightfully deserve. --Lucyfer & his friend, Wlado! 01:27, July 14, 2011 (UTC)

Oh no! I wasn't angry, or anything. I just wanted to let you know so you don't take credit for someone else's image in the future. Anyway, cheers! --Tophat headless 01:39, July 14, 2011 (UTC)

So, have you got my other pictures done? --Lucyfer & his friend, Wlado! 21:09, July 15, 2011 (UTC)

Oh, sorry, I forgot. I'll try to start on them soon, when I have the time. But you may get better pictures if you ask Lyrithya or Zombiebaron personally. But if you still want me to do them, I will. --Tophat headless 04:29, July 16, 2011 (UTC)

edit Signpost article

NICE! :) --ShabiDOO 22:48, July 15, 2011 (UTC)

Hey, thanks, man. But I don't see any money, maybe you're hiding it in your pockets? I sure hope so. Anyway, I like the colors of your new sig. --Tophat headless 04:26, July 16, 2011 (UTC)
I can only offer you a currency you would never understand. Yes...the colours are sublime. Lolllllipop is a myrrical worker! --ShabiDOO 04:46, July 16, 2011 (UTC)
Alright, if that's all you can offer, that's what I want. Remember, I'll take anything. --Tophat headless 05:18, July 16, 2011 (UTC)

edit The Tournament

Hey man. I heard you were doing the templates (and numerous other things) for the Uncyclopedia Summer Extravaganza. I was wondering if you could make the award badges for the winners, and a hilarious put-down badge for the drop-outs. IF you are interested, please reply here with your thoughts. Thanks...A (Ruins) 22:18, July 17, 2011 (UTC)

Hey, bro, you know I like you a lot, I voted for your articles on VFH and article of the month, however I have got some feedback from Oliphaute and I: We must agree with the summer's competition team: we would really have liked to form a team with Black Flamingo (see his talk page You are a formatting master: we like to think we are more traditional writers. A couple of pics to support the text, you know? Old school I guess. There are some other teams out there that could use your incredible formatting talents. I hope you don't take it the wrong way, we just want this competition to work and it is my observation other team need a second person (since there are some with only one participant) of your high caliber. I just want the competition to succeed. Snowflake mini Mattsnow 14:35, July 19, 2011 (UTC)

This is really lame to say the least. The sign ups are closed...the six teams are filled and Magicman is a good writer and you are saying this now? Writing with other people is a challenge and it will demonstrate the strength of your skills as a writer by working with someone with a different writing style than yours. Do you see any of those teams that are not mixed (except maybe the admin team?) Its very disagreeable to say the least suggesting someone not be on your team, especially AFTER the sign ups are all closed...especially to a good writer. --ShabiDOO 20:24, July 19, 2011 (UTC)
It isn't a personal attack on Magic Man, it was just that we were disappointed to have invited someone and they arrived too late. Needless to say, we were a little frustrated by that, but it isn't against Magic Man's writing ability. It's just sometimes troublesome when plans falter.
Anyways, now that I think about it, it was rather an asshole move to ask this of Magic Man. We are adults here (debatable) and it was a little petty of us to propose this proposition of proposing to promote the pre-medidated pre-disposition of a pre-dominately good character with such a proposal of proposition. Also, we didn't want to kick Magic Man out, we just wanted to include another person and we thought switching members with another team would suit that problem, but it seems silly now thinking about it. Anyways, sorry and we hope to have a good competition and that we can all win working together. --Sir Oliphaunte (განხილვა)  Georgia-flag-on-soccer-ball-vector 22:14, July 19, 2011 (UTC)
why don't you go ask Joe nicely on his page if the teams can have 4 members? He wanted the teams limited to 6 (perhaps so the judges would only have 12 articles to review). Might be nice to have upto 4 members per team...and that way your 4th person could be there. If you post that on his page, Ill reply suggesting that it is a good idea...prepositionally speaking in a pre-theorhetically prepotentious way (prepostorously). --ShabiDOO 22:44, July 19, 2011 (UTC)
I just did ask Joe nicely on his talkpage, feel free to go support me! I understand it was a cheap move, I tried to be as nice as I could, but we really thought BF would join, it seems he doesn't know how to go on forums... It's because BF declared my love for me and MM has yet to do so lol. I really hope the 3 or 4 members per team works out, if not, we'll be happy to write with Magic Man! Snowflake mini Mattsnow 23:53, July 19, 2011 (UTC)
Aimsplode, I wasn't aware that I was supposed to make the awards. If I was, no one told me. But I'd be very happy to make them, if you still want me to. Mattsnow, I'll change groups if you all really want me to, but I'd much rather stay in. Your choice. --Tophat headless 14:49, July 30, 2011 (UTC)
Yeah, stay. You're a much bigger asset to the group than I am. --Black Flamingo 15:17, July 30, 2011 (UTC)
Thanks. That is, of course, debatable, but thanks nonetheless. --Tophat headless 15:29, July 30, 2011 (UTC)
Of course you stay Magic Man. Sorry for that. :) Snowflake mini Mattsnow 16:20, July 30, 2011 (UTC)

edit The UnSignpost: Avoid all contact with eyes.

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:12, July 21, 2011 (UTC)

edit More class than 9000 schools: It's the UnSignpost!

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:12, July 28, 2011 (UTC)

edit FFW

Hey, man, just a heads up - FFW tagging ended on the 28th, so you'll have to go back to the usual assortment of tags now. Thanks. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy 18:26, 31 July 2011

Yeah, I wasn't sure when it ended so I figured if it'd already ended someone would tell me. And look, here you are, telling me. --Tophat headless 18:32, July 31, 2011 (UTC)

edit ChiefjusticeDS is a lazy sod and has paid the ultimate price... an UnSignpost Coup

~ Fnoodle (talk) (my creator) 00:11, August 6, 2011 (UTC)
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