User talk:Ljlego/archive3

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It's smart and actually makes sense. A thousand times better than the shit ED cranked out, but that goes without saying. I'd say it's about as close to a tasteful approach as is possible. -- Tinymooose.gif » Sir Savethemooses Grand Commanding Officer ... holla atcha boy» 00:38, 13 September 2007 (UTC)


I am impressed by your hipster lingo and I am too "down" with the "street" like you. However, I am a noob here and that makes my "I eat n00bs" shirt a lie. 20:30 10 September 2007 -Magnettis P.S. can you adopt me, we already know eachother so you won't be one of those abusive foster parents that handcuff you to the radiator.

Who said that?-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 00:43, 11 September 2007 (UTC)

Adoption Enquiry

It says here that you may have a slot open for adoption. If so, I would be honored to be your protégé. I certainly qualify as a n00b here on uncyclopedia. Please don't feel the need to kick someone else out of your program on my behalf, though. I'm sure that someone else could adopt me. Pression Wyvern annoy,complain to/about,deface talk page 07:25, 10 September 2007 (UTC)

Hooray! I thank you for your generous and swift adoption of mine poor aforementioned self! I shall begin article productivity immediately. Speaking of which, here is an article that I had already created prior to adoption. Note that it took me entirely too long, was a result of a horribly inefficient process, and does not include some things that I would like to have put in if I knew how. (like images) Nevertheless, an article. Pression Wyvern annoy,complain to/about,deface talk page 03:59, 11 September 2007 (UTC)

Soviet Russia Article.

Give a link on my talk page of that soviet russia article. I forgot what its called and i just like to laugh again. In soviet russia, if you forget article's name, article forgets your name! Fashionista5676 19:41, 30 August 2007 (UTC)

Thank you for thanking me for my vote

It certainly had nothing to do with bribery.It's Mrthejazz... a case not yet solved. 20:01, 9 August 2007 (UTC)

Was this truly necessary?

Donut keeps bumping this topic!
Fucking Donut-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM (Talk) 16:16, 7 July 2007 (UTC)

I feel unloved--Donut Buy One!|F@H|MUN|NS|Please Help Me|. 11:31, 6 August 2007 (UTC)

Ah, sorry about that. I didn't mean to insult you. Just a deterioration of a stupid forum topic. No harm meant.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 13:42, 6 August 2007 (UTC)

I'm really sorry

I didn't mean the vandalism on Satan. I fixed some typos, saved it and my browser crashed, causing problems. Insane-Contrast 01:58, 2 August 2007 (UTC)

Here's the code

{| class="infobox bordered" style="width:21em; text-align:center; font-size:95%;" |+ style="padding-bottom:4px; font-size:125%;"| '''{{{name}}}'''</tr> |style="text-align:center;"| [[Image:{{{image}}}|150px| ]]<br/>{{{caption}}}</tr> !style="background:linen;"| Established</tr> |style="padding:4px;"| <!--carriage-return maintains line-spacing:--> {{{established}}}</tr> !style="background:linen;"| Acronym</tr> |style="padding:4px;"| <!--carriage-return maintains line-spacing:--> {{{acronym}}}</tr> !style="background:linen;"| Administrator</tr> |style="padding:4px;"| {{{administrator}}}</tr> !style="background:linen;"| Budget</tr> |style="padding:4px; text-align:left;"| {{{budget}}}</tr> !style="background:linen;"| URL</tr> |style="padding:4px;"| {{{URL}}}</tr> |}

[[Image:{{{image}}}|150px| ]]










cheers -- Gay2.gifCartoonDiabloGay2.gif


Hi Ljlego - I noticed you've de-ICUed various pretty rubbish things this evening, and I was wondering why? Normally I'd just assume bad faith, but I can't really do that with you...! If it's just because they survived seven days, you're kind of missing the point of ICU - it means that things get seven days minimum and then are up for huffing, which normally takes admins a while to get round to. Changing construction for ICU should also be unnecessary to get things huffed. (I'll stop snooping your contribs now...! :-) ) If that wasn't the reason, then please enlighten, because I'll probably be putting them back on again tomorrow unless told otherwise... --Strange (but) Untrue  Whhhy?Whut?How? *Back from the dead* 00:25, 30 July 2007 (UTC)

Ah, no, I see what you've done. With the QVFD and all. That's a bit risky IMHO - things get passed over on QVFD, especially if they're ICU length. Best just to let the ICU list catch them I think. --Strange (but) Untrue  Whhhy?Whut?How? *Back from the dead* 00:27, 30 July 2007 (UTC)
I was about to come and yell at you about the same thing. Thou shalt not remove ICU tags, unless either A) it was added by some n00b to an article which shouldn't have had it, or B) it's been drastically improved (best if by you) and no longer needs the ICU. If ICUs are backing up, yell at an admin who's not me and we'll tear through them. QVFD is for short one-liners and vanity which needs to go now. Bone_F_clear.png Sir Famine, Gun Petition » 07/30 15:13


For this. Some people use preview. I don't. I'm a rebel. It says so on my pajamas. The footy kind of pajamas. Rebel jammies. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 00:51, 31 July 2007 (UTC)

No worries. People have certainly saved my ass enough that it's time to return the favor.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 01:02, 31 July 2007 (UTC)
Yes. I seem to recall a user who was having trouble with his signature. A signature that, itself, was causing trouble. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 01:15, 31 July 2007 (UTC)
Yep. Oh, dear, this gets me nostalgic. I swore to myself I would cry! But, alas, I cannot. Such is life.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 01:34, 31 July 2007 (UTC)

Thanks muchly!

Thank you for voting
For me, of course.

You voted for Dr. Skullthumper for Noob of the Month! Yes, really. You did, honest. Check the history logs. You still don't remember? Maybe you were drunk, or something. Well anyway — just take my word for it, you did.

So as a thank you, I've decided to give you one of the few existing Magic 8.1 balls. Unlike the Magic 8 ball, it will never give you an inaccurate answer. I've made sure of that. Use it wisely. Like as a paperweight.

 Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize  writings  SU&W) 17:34 Oct 26, 2016 04:27, 1 August 2007 (UTC)

Thanks for your vote


Though it's cold and lonely in the deep, dark night

They can see a Pair of Dice by the Dashboard Light

Fuzzy dice

I guess some songs are for all time. Sir Roger 05:09, 1 August 2007 (UTC)


As you were totally deserving. And I don't see the future...I create it. -RAHB 20:29, 1 August 2007 (UTC)


Sir Ljlego, you flatter me... and I like it! You're very welcome for the vote for Writer of the Month, I feel you've paid your dues to wear 'dem shoes. Cheers! Zimbuddha Rev. Zim (Talk) Get saved! 23:09, 1 August 2007 (UTC)

Ban Patrol

Hi you shiny diamond you, hey, I am wondering if we can make a Ban Patrol Page, like the VFH page, and I was wondering who helped you to do what you did...I asked Famine what he thought and we just have to get a mock up going and test. I asked Mhaille also because I would father his children. Thanks. Sir Severian Severian1 CUN (Sprich mit mir!) Kraut 16:59, 4 August 2007 (UTC) Looky here.

Thank you!

Russian Roulette Guy UGH
Thekillerfroggy would like to thank you for reading and enjoying his instructional Russian Roulette handbook. Now you can be just like me (pictured)!
Oh, those Russians...


Thanks again! -- Big_Brother_Sig_Part_1.pngCUN PLS VFH (MiniluvMinitrueUnsoc) 05:27, 6 August 2007 (UTC)

Sweet Christ!


I thank you humbly for the opportunity to impose myself upon the tiny box marked Today's featured article. My own little box in this dark corner of the interweb. My welcoming visage, greeting all who visit this cartoonish funhouse of crazy people. The depravity, flowing like gravy down the chin of a senator. This is my honor.

Much appreciated, you bastard.

Yours always,

(dictated but not read. Transcripted by your pal, THINKER 04:33, 8 August 2007 (UTC).)

VFH removals

Thanks for getting some of the stagnant stuff off VFH for me while I'm not paying as much attention to that. I have a couple of suggestions. 1)Make sure you have a general set of guidelines for what you're taking off. (This will help when some fanatical writer demands who the Hell you are to take their article off VFH). 2)Make sure you take the {{VFH}} tag off the page when you take it off VFH. Just some reminders from your friendly, neighborhood Bradaphraser.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 12:33, 8 August 2007 (UTC)

Beautiful. Thanks for the thanks. To address your reminders, I'm using Uncyclopedia:QFA as my guidelines, and I will now remove the template as if I always was.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 20:35, 8 August 2007 (UTC)

Russian Reversal Rewrite

SpacerSpacerPremierTomMayfairChe RedPhone Unsoc Hammer and sickle05:26, 09 August 2007


I've been trying out new things, cause I didn't like the way it looked. But now that you mention it, this particular one is hideous. -RAHB 23:22, 10 August 2007 (UTC)


Um, Ljlego, the guy you accused of sockpuppetry isn't a sock. He's a retard my brother. P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 23:32, 12 August 2007 (UTC)

Alright, just being wary of any cheese related nick atm.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 23:53, 12 August 2007 (UTC)
Oh, I didn't say you shouldn't be wary of him. I just said he wasn't a sock. P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 02:19, 13 August 2007 (UTC)

The Darwin Rule


An Elder Stateman of Uncyclopedia

  • Whereas I'm not really familiar with the VFH, and you are, and
  • Whereas you recently removed one of my nominations - not that I'm accusing you of anything; you followed the rules, but
  • Whereas the vote for this was 8 for and none against,
  • I think the Darwin Rule is bogus.

To put it in regular language, I've read up on the Darwin Rule, and it strikes me as both confusing and unfair. Judging an article's quality by against the quality of the article next to it is worse than judging a book by its cover, it's judging a book by the quality of the book sitting next to it on the shelf. I'm an immigrant from Wikipedia, and in my time there I was a worker in a collective collaboration project called the Article Improvement Drive (though it went through several names). I was one of the architects of that project, and I stayed with it through many of its early design stages. I think that the voting system at VFH is unfair, and I think everyone would benefit from a debate that either eliminates or validates the current system. Whaddaya say? -Tritefantastic 02:52, 15 August 2007 (UTC)

I am also puzzled by this turn of events: eight people vote for an article, and a ninth person suddenly removes the article's candidacy? I understand a 14 year old might not "get" the humor in such an article, but what percentage of Uncyclopedia readers are 14 and under? Trite wrote a great article that deserves highlighting, and the opinion of a single individual should not derail the process. Firsfron 09:06, 15 August 2007 (UTC)
I've never hidden my dislike of the Darwin Rule, but one of the problems we have is the huge amount of articles nommed for VFH. We DO need a way to remove articles that have stagnated in terms of the voting, so there should be a movable scale where the more votes it has the longer it can survive. Most articles get featured around the mid teens upwards, so without seeing the specific article mentioned above it would generally need to double its for votes before its in with a chance. Also, being 14 isn't a significator of anything, other than the amount of summers you've seen. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb (talk to me)
I am a total newbie, but the article had received a supporter just two hours before the nomination was removed, so the nomination doesn't seem stagnant to me. There are only 21 articles on the VFH list, only 3 of which meet the 15+ vote thing you mention; it doesn't seem like a massive backlog to me. Oh well. It's a great article even without the recognition. Thanks. Firsfron 12:11, 15 August 2007 (UTC)
The purpose of the Darwin Rule is to remove stagnating nominations from the VFH page. The goal is to keep the number of nominations at 20, and thus you use it. I suggest you see Uncyclopedia:QFA to see what's going on with the Darwin Rule. I'm going to choose to ignore that you brought my age into this and instead note that, at the end of the day, you can always nominate it again. With that I wish you luck.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 12:28, 15 August 2007 (UTC)
You not on IRC, Ljlego? -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb (talk to me)
Nope. I was working. I am now accessing the Internet from said workplace. Why, what happened?-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 17:11, 15 August 2007 (UTC)
I am wishing to be speaking to you. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb (talk to me)
Figure since I'm here, I'll add my two cents. The Darwin rule can be unfair, but don't despair, your page may be eligible for Category:Quasi-Featured. Take a look at the page (C+P into URL), see if you qualify. QF'd pages tend to be re-nommed and featured down the road. P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 03:35, Aug 17, 2007
Sorry I just got back here; it hadn't occurred to me that you might continue the discussion here. Anyway, I've read all of this, and I still think that the Darwin Rule is bogus - in fact, I think more so, since we've got five people here talking about it with nary a shred of support. You don't like it, I don't like it, it's unfair and it's illogical. And I'm not just throwing up my hands here and saying "There must be a better way!," I'm offering to help you design that better way. But I need help, because I don't know anything about how anything works here. And for the record, I worked damn hard on DuMont Television Network, and if it ends up quasi-featured I want it to be because it's genuinely inferior, not because The System doesn't have time for me. -Tritefantastic 03:38, 19 August 2007 (UTC)
I try not to do drivebys on other peoples' talkpages but...I can't keep my own damn mouth shut any longer. Darwin is hard; the alternate is worse. Typically, if pages don't get dropped from VFH it grows and stagnates. This stagnation causes growth, which leads to stagnation. Yes, Darwin is a bitch. Yes, Darwin makes VFH a popularity contest. No, VFH has always been a popularity contest. Pages that don't rise as fast as those around them get culled. Unfortunately, the time and day and the other pages that surround your page on VFH are outside of your control, for the most part. Get used to it. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 05:07, 19 August 2007 (UTC)
MO is mostly right on this issue, the only thing I would add to it is that Darwin himself would probably recognise that maybe his rule could evolve slightly to fit in with the current environmental issues. Maybe a few tweaks to the existing rule will give us a fairer system that we can all be happy with? Maybe.... -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb (talk to me)

Alright, let's hear from the guy who this was directed at now. I personally don't dislike the Darwin Rule. I've had quite a few nominations removed at its natural selection-related hands. All I can say is try again and again. Sure, it may not work, but you know what? At least you know you put a lot of effort into your article. Modusoperandi can attest to the fact that I was once much like you. Dismayed at the fact that it didn't seem my work was reaching anyone. Don't spite me because I'm following a rule developed to keep VFH from becoming a petri dish for every article on the site. I've been told that there were times before its existence where there could be over 100 articles up for feature at the same time. And about 75 or 80 of those 100 would never get featured that time around anyway. The moral of the story is that sometimes things don't seem fair. Just keep on chugging away, and sooner or later your work will get the recognition it deserves, I promise.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 14:20, 19 August 2007 (UTC)

I accept your explanations, and I understand - I just moved - that there is a whole mess of stuff you throw away because after about the twentieth hour you don't even care what you're throwing out, you just want it over with. I know. Oh God, do I know.

However, I want to show that I really am serious when I say that I'm not just another ticket-holder in the line at Human Resources and that I really do have a Better Way, a way tested in a trial-by-fire at Wikipedia.

This process originated through gene-swapping between Wikipedia's COTW and AID, the two user-run projects that were designed to build great new articles and refurbish old ones, respectively. After a lot of botched selection methods and a merger between the two groups that formed a new group, the ACID, the voting system in place had stabilized into something everyone was happy with. Or, at least, during my time on the management team nobody complained. The key principle behind this voting process never had a name, but I'll call it the Cutoff Rule. It works like this ("today" is January 1st):

Article A

Article A has 3 votes. It needs 4 votes by January 2

  • User 1
  • User 2
  • User 3

Article B

Article B has 27 votes. It needs 28 votes by January 23

  • User 4
  • User 2
  • User 5
  • [...]
  • User 27

Article C

Article C has 1 vote. It needs four votes by January 2

  • User 12
Now here's how this works - I know that the time frame for the Cutoff Rule's actual use on VFH would have to be sped up dramatically, but I'll get to that in a minute:

Articles are nominated using a process that is basically the same as the one at VFH. However, once nominated they automatically receive a week's stay on the ACID, but in that time they have to garner enough votes to by another week, and another week after that, etc. ACID doesn't have a "negative voting" option, but that doesn't actually effect the way the rule works, and this option could easily be integrated to use with the Cutoff Rule. Article A was nominated six days ago, and stands a fighting chance of gaining that crucial fourth vote that will push it over the top and by it another week's time. let's say it does - then it's vote counter will read Article A has 4 votes. It needs 8 votes by January 9. Article B is doing much better - it ha vaulted several week's worth of hurdles in advance, and even if it doesn't get any more votes it will stay on the ACID until January 23. Each week, however, one article is chosen to be worked upon, and this article is the article with the highest number of votes. If Article B is the article with the highest number of votes, then it will declared that week's winner. Article C is basically doomed. In the first six days of its nomination, no-one other than its nominator has given it support. It will probably be removed the following day.

How this process could be implemented at the VFH

  • The beauty of the Cutoff Rule is that, unlike the Darwin rule, it's adjustable. The key is the number of votes an article needs to buy itself a pre-measured amount of time. It's like watering a garden: too much, and the garden drowns. Too little, it withers up. If you make the number of votes required too high, then the number of articles will shrink too much - if you set it too low, then the dreaded stagnation will set it. When the ACID was still the AID, we actually dealt with this problem in just this manner. For a time the number of votes required to buy an article an additional week of time was 3, but the backlog was seventy-something. So we changed it to 4, grandfathered it in gradually, and the list was shored up nicely.
  • As with the Darwin rule, the Cutoff Rule system would have the winner be the article with the most number of votes when the time of choosing comes.
  • In the case of the VFH, where, as I understand it, one new article is selected daily, the amount of time a set number of votes would purchase would probably be one day (obviously, one week is much too long for your use). I figure that the Cutoff Rule, implemented at a take up rate of 3 votes buys 1 day, would yield something close to the 20-name waiting list that is your benchmark. All this would be possible with the much simpler, equally effective, far more adjustable and totally unbiased voting system that I have detailed here.
  • Please let me know what you think. -Tritefantastic 03:48, 20 August 2007 (UTC)
I was going to suggest the Fuckoff Method. Its rules are much simpler. "Was the article written by Mhaille? No? Then...." -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb (talk to me)
However, here's the problem that I have with the cutoff rule. First, the good news. I absolutely applaud you for actually having a proposed better way for this. Beautiful. Now, for the bad news: this just seems very wishy-washy. What works at Wikipedia doesn't necessarily work here (case in point: AFD versus VFD). Also, three votes buys one day seems very unfair. That means, if there's a slow day on VFH, and an article doesn't get three votes, it gets sacked? That doesn't make sense to me. Look, I'm sorry that your article got screwed by the system. But HowTo:Beat the Odds (one of mine) got pushed away by VFH a while back, and now it's one of the top articles of the month. UnBooks:The World According to Garm took four nominations to make it through VFH. VFH is not the be-all-end-all of quality judgement, so don't be a slave to it. It will tear you apart if you take it too seriously. If you want to pose this for the general community to vote on, go to Forum:Village Dump, because I am certainly not qualified to speak for all of Uncyclopedia. However, Mhaille's idiocy notwithstanding, I don't know that we need a new method.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 16:21, 20 August 2007 (UTC)
  • I am still convinced of the superiority of this method, if only because of its lack of inherent bias. I can see that I haven't managed to sell you or anyone else here on my convictions - though I thank you for taking the time to engage me in debate - but I haven't given up yet. I'm going to the Dump. Thank you again. -Tritefantastic 01:03, 21 August 2007 (UTC)

Thanks muchly for voting

For voting, I award you this award.

HumVee The Led Balloon has awarded you a shiny new Humvee. You may wanna, uh, keep an eye on that, ya know? Just park it in the garage for a few nights, ok?
Thanks for voting, and remember, don't let yourself be brainwashed by the Eco-Nazis!

Shoot indeed. P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 03:35, Aug 17, 2007

Forget me?

It's been almost three weeks since you last said you would adjust the format of my article. That must be one hell of a task queue you've got. --CUN RA Talk to me _ 23:29, 17 August 2007 (UTC)

No, no. It's not that I forgot or anything. I'm just confused. I don't get what's wrong with the formatting. I see the pictures all messed up, but I don't quite get it. Plus, I've been writing and working and playing tennis, but I've been working on it.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 03:08, 18 August 2007 (UTC)


Thank you for helping my article. —CUN RA Talk to me _ 01:11, 23 August 2007 (UTC)

Thanks For voting!

For nominating, and also voting for my page, I award you this template:

Lumps2 The Led Balloon has awarded you a handy pamphlet, so that you will always remember how to check for lumps.
Thanks for voting on my article, and giving me TWO FEATURES IN A ROW! Also: beware the deadly lumps!

Thanks again, P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 19:16, Aug 19, 2007

Thanks Fer Teh Vote

I am thankful for voting positive-ily on my ADHD article... Take this imagry as an exchange for my ethernal gratitude (I do not yet comprehend template-making)--Flipwits:


Working on it

Thanks for the warning. You see, im trying to juggle several new pages at once and its hard. DarkBlue 21:09, 20 August 2007 (UTC)

Thanks for votin'!


THE has granted you an express invitation to Skippy Leadwell's Funeral. The eulogy will be delivered by Leviticus, one of his favorite blades of grass who is being flown in first-class from Africa. Mr. Leadwell will be laid to rest on a pile of grass clippings. There he will lie with his brothers for eternity. Or at least until he starts to smell.

Thanks for voting for UnScripts:Grass in the Mist. --THE 22:13, 20 August 2007 (UTC)

Hey I heard you were editing the Chuck Norris page. Would you think about putting something along the lines of this

== "Chuck then spent years in a Mental Rehabilitation center, after googling his name. His mind then Bold textItalic textasploded when he saw that he was apparently not known as a genuinally nice guy."

I know it's not very well written, but you could fancy it up.

RunningForBreath 04:24, 21 August 2007 (UTC) ==

Russian reversal (phenomenon)

Ljlego, you wrote "Am sorry to hear that you disliked Russian reversal (phenomenon)..."

First, my heartfelt congratulations on the feature. The article really is worth featuring.

Second, "dislike" is too strong a word. It really is. What happens, I think, is that someone with my online personality type makes a statement and, when someone else disagrees (usually politely), the first person feels impelled to defend and strengthen his position. Quite often he finds himself writing statements that are much more vehement than his actual feelings. In this particular discussion I ended up posting arguments that really went beyond my original mild feelings concerning a very minor aspect of the piece...statements which, in retrospect, were pretty silly.

It's a personality flaw. I know it but sometimes can't stop it. (The one-eyed jacks are the jacks of hearts and spades, symbolizing love and hate: very opinionated, very judgemental -- but not necessarily balanced or wise.)

You will write more good articles, because you have Teh Talent. Have fun! ----OEJ 10:30, 21 August 2007 (UTC)


Since you voted for Blue Screen of Death on VFH, your user talk page has encountered a fatal addition of a template.
To correct this problem, you must either:
1. Accept SRXT's sincere thanks, or
2. Go and buy a better PC, you cheap bugger.
Select an option _

SRXT. 23/08 06.51pm

All hail!

--The Acceptable Thinking cap small Cainad Sacred Chao (Fnord) 09:43, 25 August 2007 (UTC)

Another rewrite task

Hello, Ljlego. I like your rewrite on Russian reversal (phenomenon), but there is another article that needs attention; one that only your fine writing abilities can do. Please rewrite the article Your mom, as it is merely a collection of quotes, jokes, and images. Nothing else (except some unfunny cruft). Keep the idea (i.e. she's fat/a whore), but please make it into something worth reading. Thanks. --AAA! (AAAA) 02:35, 26 August 2007 (UTC)

Oooh, a challenge! Well, I'm smack dab in the middle of a Chuck Norris rewrite, which I've kinda hit a wall with. I'll get to the Your mom, I promise.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 21:35, 26 August 2007 (UTC)

You've been Invited


You've been invited to take an exiting new beta test of concept of Satiropendium, the comedic compendium!

Satiropendium requires good writers willing to collaborate articles with others, tough critics to review the articles to see if they're worthy, and stewards to verify the articles as being the best they are. More details can be seen in the link. If you are not the best writer, the inviter might have you in mind as a critic and steward, and if ever the full wiki is setup, you will be able to have a chance to get a full fleged admin account, but that's only if you're one of the first five to sign up for the job (and there's a pretty good you will be).

Note: There was a seperate wiki, but because it was a decrepit old version of mediawiki, it was shut down until adequate hosting can be found. You can help us get hosting by joining and helping out!

~ Tophatsig <p class="nounderlinelink" style="display:inline; font-variant: small-caps; font-family: serif;">Jacques Pirat, Esq. Converse : Benefactions : U.w.p.</p> 27/08/2007 @ 02:33

Thanks for voting!

Volleybeauty WILSON!! WIILLSOOONN!! Hey, there he is! Anyways, The Led Balloon would like to thank you for voting on UnBooks:The Castaway.
When you get on the raft, don't forget to bring......
Oh, never mind...

P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 21:36, Aug 29, 2007

Thwack!! I mean, uh, thanks!

Child abuse The Led Balloon humbly thanks you for reading and voting on UnNews:Hitting children found to have positive effects on brain development.
Remember, it's for their own damn good!

Btw, it's getting to be about time to archive the ol' talk page, no? P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 04:40, Sep 2, 2007

Meh. I'd do it, but the section numbers are very low. I usually don't consider 'til about 60. That, however, doesn't take into account Tritefantastic up there.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 04:43, 2 September 2007 (UTC)

Take heart, li'l soldier

Remember, they can't all be golden. I remember, back in the day, I self-nommed a page that I wroted all by myself, I did. It was, at that time, my most favouritist page. Long story short, it was met with a smattering of tepid applause. I still wake up at night in a cold sweat. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 01:18, 7 September 2007 (UTC)

Wow. Thanks for the pep talk. But don't worry, I'm fine. You may need some help for that cold sweat, though. Perhaps menopause is the cause (yay I makeded a rime!). But seriously, thanks for taking heart at my plight. The only thing that worries me is that I only see you voting against my bad less-than-good pages, whereas you ignore my other ones. It makes me think, somewhere in my heart of hearts, that my articles are sub-par-ish. I don't liek that.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 01:28, 7 September 2007 (UTC)
Sometimes I vote for. Others, against. Most of the time I'm not swayed enough either way to vote. That you noticed my not-voting so much is only because you have so much stuff hit VFH. While the first bit can't (or shouldn't) be taken as bad (merely meh), the second bit is good. The ones that I vote for, like HowTo:Be a Jehovah's Witness, incidentally, are really good. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 01:44, 7 September 2007 (UTC)
Ah, thanks. It is true that I have no life and nothing better to do than watch my articles hit VFH and nearly fail. The adrenaline rush is like no other. Except maybe that of physical activity or being shot at. But I digress. Anyway, yeah. I remember the last time this sort of conversation happened. I was bitching to you how you against'd Fat Albert. It was a good night. You inspired me to write Nazi, first in a long line of successfully whored crap replacing bad crap.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 01:50, 7 September 2007 (UTC)
So, I've played my own small part in the play that is Ljlego. Remember me in your memoires. My own secret is having a boring job, which leaves the right side of my brain with nothing to do for long periods of time. Sort of like when you think of something while on the toilet, but without the poo. Also, Hardwick found a page of mine once and Hardwick'd that SOB up. That was illuminating; I'd never noticed before how a series of small changes can make a huge difference. I blame him for my habit of over-editing and over-thinking pages. It's blame in a good way. He's the master. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 02:21, 7 September 2007 (UTC)
It's funny. The Thinker did that to a couple o' my pages. Then you done inspired me. I have to wonder what I did myself. This will require some ponderation.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 02:25, 7 September 2007 (UTC)
Sophia works in mysterious ways. Also, she drinks all my bourbon. The muse is a harsh mistress. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 02:29, 7 September 2007 (UTC)
Indeed. So is loneliness. Also, in an unrelated story, I just wanted to let you know that you also inspired me to start writing in the first place with HowTo:Deliver a Baby. Possibly the funniest article ever. But it was my first, after all. I love it. No, I am not being a sycophant.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 02:33, 7 September 2007 (UTC)
Thanks. I had that "baseball" pic in my head for weeks, but it wasn't until I remembered the octopus "bit" from Braydie's HowTo:Cheat_At_Scrabble that it came together. It's like a chain of events, or sumpin'. Serendipity at it's finest. Now you have to pass it to someone else. Choose wisely. Or not. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 02:48, 7 September 2007 (UTC)
And let's not forget how you both helped me out with my first feature! MO nommed it, and Ljlego taught me how to whore it! And Hardwick of course, he was an influence on us all... Actually, when I say "all", I mean "People who aren't me". He stopped writing just as I started. A sign? I'd like to think so! All in all, we're all just one big happy family! Yay! P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 02:59, Sep 7, 2007
I like to think that Ljlego helped with a little more than the necessary finesse of votewhoring. But then again, I like to think a lot of things that aren't true. Like that it's all the people's fault.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 23:34, 7 September 2007 (UTC)
Also, MO, the octopus bit was the best. Which isn't to say the rest isn't funny. In any case, I think the moral of the story is I should've started being active here sooner.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 23:54, 7 September 2007 (UTC)
This story has a moral? I thought it was "Be careful what you wish for.". No, wait, that was that Twilight Zone episode with Burgess Meredith, the library, and the glasses. Awful, awful episode. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 00:07, 8 September 2007 (UTC)


D... If this image fails to win anything for you on VFP I'll make an article for it! --AmericanBastard 02:35, 8 September 2007 (UTC)

Well, thanks for the offer. I'm glad to see you're so enthusiastic about it. But, I'm sorry to have to tell you this, there already is an article on "D." It was written by me and is currently featured. Really, though, your enthusiasm is appreciated.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 02:38, 8 September 2007 (UTC)


For some reason yours and Andorin Kato's .js and a faulty Desciclopedia page appear to be on the deadend pages category. I was wondering if there was a way to remove them from there? --BonSig.png (Bonner) Icons-flag-gb (Talk) 15:36, 8 September 2007 (UTC)

No idea. Seems to me like that's dumb, as no .js should really have links anyway. But no matter. Just ignore until I find out.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 15:39, 8 September 2007 (UTC)

Don't Stop

Sure, you've been notified before that what you do is amazing, but never by me, on your talkpage, with a Supergrass. Anyway, I'm doing it now. So, don't stop. -- Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 15:37, 8 September 2007 (UTC)

Oooh, shiny Supergrass. Now that was a helluva superhero, that Supergrass. A blade of grass wearing a uniform and fighting crime....kicked the shit out of Superman. Now those were the days. It was my tender youth, and I was looking for pornographic magazines, and instead I came upon this, the super-iest of all super blades of grass. What was I talking about again?-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 15:50, 8 September 2007 (UTC)
Oh yeah, I remember, the award. Thanks a lot, my Zombie friend. This is an honor.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 15:50, 8 September 2007 (UTC)

Adopt me, Please

Yep, you guessed it, I'm asking for adoption. I wrote a fairly decent article with EMC and The Con Man, then another fairly decent article, mostly by me, but EMC touched it up a bit. Soooo, you might wanna strike while the digital iron is hot. --Nordamus Icons-flag-us (blab • crap) 19:18, 8 September 2007 (UTC)

Indeed, I shall taketh you. Which means that I'll have to unload another one of my adoptees. Russian roulette time!-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 19:36, 8 September 2007 (UTC)
Fantastic. One more thing, however- please leave messages to people on their talk page, as it lets them know when they get new messages. --Nordamus Icons-flag-us (blab • crap) 20:27, 8 September 2007 (UTC)
Meh. This is the way most people conduct their conversations. I suggest adding active conversations to your watchlist.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 20:29, 8 September 2007 (UTC)
Meh, you're probably right. Although I'm not the funniest man on Earth, I'm decent. Sorry for wasting your time. --Nordamus Icons-flag-us (blab • crap) 20:59, 8 September 2007 (UTC)
No, no! I'd be happy to adopt you if you want to learn more about the craft of writing. Consider yourself adopted. And please, you're not wasting my time. You're just talking to me wif Uncyc (which is wasting my time, but I digress). So, you are my adopted progeny. First task: read HTBFANJS again. I don't care if you read it already, do it again. I still read it every so often. Then, mock up an original article in your userspace (User:Nordamus/Pagename) that I'll take a look-see at. I'll give you some constructive criticism on that, and then we repeat the process. If you get tired of writing at any time, please take your time to vote on VFH to read some genuinely good articles, VFD to help maintain the site's cleanliness, and even take a look at Recent Changes and see what vandalism you can revert or add to QVFD. Let me know if any of this confuses you, I'll explain.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 21:05, 8 September 2007 (UTC)
I've read UN:DUMB twice, and The Creative process once. I already created some sandboxes a while ago, and I shall be working on it soon. --Nordamus Icons-flag-us (blab • crap) 22:07, 8 September 2007 (UTC)

Domo-kun review? you never told me anything about that, did you? --Nordamus Icons-flag-us (blab • crap) 00:35, 10 September 2007 (UTC)

I didn't write that. 'Twas an IP.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 01:10, 10 September 2007 (UTC)
I reviewed Domo-Kun. Whatcha think? --Nordamus Icons-flag-us (blab • crap) 03:37, 10 September 2007 (UTC)
I finished one of my sandboxes titled However. It's a stub, but, whatcha think? Nordamus Icons-flag-us (blab • crap) 03:30, 12 September 2007 (UTC)

I <3 my papa

thankyou for my adoption!!!--Oh Nut.Nutwhore 22:06, 8 September 2007 (UTC)

The (Late) WotM Thankering

Well well, Ljlego. My Luke Skywalker. Thank you for the nom, which led to my award, which you won before me. Excellent. I wish So So would get it this month, but Led is great also. Anyway, I humbly appreciate the support, and the shiny template. I spent so long staring at them I forgot to thank everyone. --THINKER 00:20, 10 September 2007 (UTC)

Heaps of praise

JustAWall The Led Balloon has awarded you a nice, sturdy Wall, and hopes it well help you to hold up your ceiling very soon.
That's what these things do, ya know. They hold up the ceiling.

Thanks for the vote, Lj! P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 03:19, Sep 10, 2007

And now, a Generic Service Announcement

Throws and Downs Thekillerfroggy and Doctor Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart Skullthumper would like for donating to the Throws and Downs Club of America. So keep your pillows held up in your room, lock your liquor cabinet, and alert the local authorities of possible pillboxes. Only you can prevent pillow fighting!


thanks again! --SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 03:39, 14 September 2007 (UTC)

Thanks for your vote! Have a whale!

Kansasty The UnIdiot would like to award you with a authentic Kansas whale! Because apparently Kansas has oceans now! Treasure it always! Only 789,729 more left! Tell your friends!

Thanks for voting on Kansas whaling!

You, sir, are a hero!

...For voting on my page. Here, have a template.

Volcano The Led Balloon thanks you for voting on Volcano, and hopes that you now know better than to try and reason with geology.
Friggin' geology...
On a side note, it's gettin to be about time to archive the ol' talk page, no? P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 04:29, Sep 16
Yes, I suppose...Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 12:27, 16 September 2007 (UTC)

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