User talk:Jlsmith

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edit Welcome!

Hello, Jlsmith, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for nooblets:

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button (Button sig) above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Village Dump Forum, or add the following: {{help}} to this page along with a message and someone will come along and help you if they can. Additionally, the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply put {{adoptme}} on your Userpage to join. Again, welcome!  -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb (talk to me)

edit ATTENTION COLONIZER

Duty Calls! Imperial Colonization has been commandeered! With a shiny new, waterproof coat, we're heading out to sea once again. We need you for our next colonization. You have one week to nominate or vote from right now, Sunday the 31st of January 2010, to Saturday the 6th of February 2010. (See Protocol for how to nominate an article for Colonization. And remember, if you vote for an article that means you intend to help colonize it.) Then starting Sunday, 7 February 2010, we will start colonizing another savage land (i.e., improving whichever article gets the most votes). Come on board and vote or nom now, to the glory of Her Majesty!

EXTRA: Our most recent colonization, Transformers, has just been Pee Reviewed. If you're interested in making improvements, please check out the article and the review. With a little work, we may have another glorious Feature article! Wouldn't that be just spiffy? And remember, if you participate and this does get featured, you get one half feature credit!

For the Glory of Her Majesty and by Order of your Fearful Fearless Leader, WHY???PuppyOnTheRadio 19:46, January 30, 2010 (UTC)

edit ATTENTION COLONIZERS: WE ARE RECREATING CREATIONISM

The Bible says God created the world in six days by himself--our crew of talented colonizers can surely recreate an article in a week and a half! Remember, any Colonizer is welcome to work on our current project, which is the Creationism article. But before you begin, check "READ THIS FIRST" at the top. From Sunday, 7 February to Wednesday, 10 February 2010, a hearty crew of brave colonizers plotted a strong course for the article by consensus. We have the beginning of a great colonization, so go forth and colonize to the glory of Her Majesty!

Special Note for Lobsterbacks (i.e. those who signed up but haven't yet worked on a successful colonization). We plan to keep your name on the honored membership list if you make worthwhile contribution to the article or other parts of Imperial Colonization between 31 January 2010 and the end of this project. If your name is removed from the list, you are welcome to reapply when you plan to become active. Compassrose IC Buccaneer Admiral WHY??? (stratagems)  05:26, February 11, 2010 (UTC)

edit Imperial Colonization: Creationism and Batman

IMPORTANT: If you want to make comments on any part of this message, please post your comments on my talk page. I've sent this notice out to about 40 people, and will likely never see your response if you put it on your talk page. But if you insist on doing it anyway (sigh), please at least start a new section using == Your comments == below my signature and make comments there. This message is set up as a template, so if you try to make edits in this message, it will edit it everywhere, and get me nasty notes from admins.

edit The seventh day of Creationism

If you haven't heard the rumour, it's true. The new and improved and absolutely perfect version of Creationism has been created. And because it was so perfect, we got it Pee Reviewed so it could be even more perfect. Post-review edits are being done, and will be completed very soon so our colonized version can replace the current Creationism.

I gave credit on The Big Board to every colonizer who worked on the article (if I somehow missed you, put a note on my talk page). I really appreciate everyone's help; I think we have a great article. If this gets featured, however, I feel that only those who made the more substantial contributions should get co-feature credit. Otherwise, someone could add two words and get 1/2 credit for writing a feature article, which doesn't seem fair. (But note that half a dozen people or more could each get 1/2 credit; that's one of the advantages of being a colonizer as aren't limited by the laws of mathematics). Any opinions on this or anything in this notice are welcome on the IC talk page. Buccaneers traditionally work by group consensus, and I'm all for sharing the blame tradition.

edit I'm Batman

Our current colonization is Batman. Writing on it begins now. By consensus built over the past few days, this will feature a psychiatrist talking with Bruce Wayne, a delusional Arkham Asylum mental patient who thinks he is some hero named Batman--or is he delusional? See I'M BATMAN for the guidelines for this article.

Any colonizer is welcome to edit the article! Any non-colonizer who wants to apply is welcome to do so on the Imperial Colonization page. We promise we won't throw you to the sharks. Well, probably not.

edit The future

We are taking nominations and votes for our next project. As per previous IC discussions, old nominations which aren't in the lead and which haven't received any recent votes will be removed. Check out the current nominations before they fade into history--but an article removed from the list can certainly be renominated. Nominate and vote on the IC page.

Go forth and colonize! Compassrose IC Buccaneer Admiral WHY??? (stratagems)  03:44, March 4, 2010 (UTC)

edit Imperial Colonization Buccaneer Admiral walking the plank!

IMPORTANT: If you want to make comments on any part of this message, please post your comments on the IC talk page. I've sent this notice out to about 40 people, and will likely never see your response if you put it on your talk page. But if you insist on doing it anyway (sigh), please at least start a new section using == (Your comments) == below my signature, or click the + tab up above, and make comments there. This message is set up as a template, so if you try to make edits in this message, it will edit it everywhere, and get me nasty notes from admins.

Actually, I'm looking for a temporary assistant/permanent successor as head of Imperial Colonization. I got put in charge of IC because I kept bugging a certain admin. I'd say, "Why isn't somebody doing this with IC?" and "Why isn't somebody doing that with IC?" So that admin basically said "Why, you're somebody; go do it" (see discussion here). But as you can see, I took on the position planning to update IC, get it moving again, and see it through one colonization. Well, that happened. IC was updated and reactivated and, thanks to some great colonizers, Creationism was recreated in a spirit of cooperation, was rewritten on deadline, was Pee Reviewed and, as a bonus, was voter-chosen as a feature article within about a day of being nommed. Our current project, Uncyclopedia:Imperial Colonization/Batman is scheduled to be written by 20 March, and then we'll begin another. IC is moving...and I'm looking for someone to keep it moving. If interested, please post a note on the IC talk page--experienced and successful users only need apply. Ability to say "ARRRRR" like a pirate is not required, but would be nice.


WHY???PuppyOnTheRadio 16:58, March 17, 2010 (UTC)

edit Discordianism vote needed quickly and member retirement

VOTE DISCORDIAN NOW: We need your vote! On both Creationism and Batman, colonizers who participated came to a consensus on a direction for the article. But on Discordianism, there's been more discord--or at least not a consensus. So we're resorting to (sigh) democracy. Go to Uncyclopedia_talk:Imperial_Colonization/Discordianism#Article_ideas and cast your vote!

You can vote for one or two, comment on as many as you like, but vote quickly--this is an eleventh hour effort, and we will hopefully have a direction in a few hours. I'll be checking the results sometime around 03:00 UTC of 25 March 2010.

ARE YOU RETIRED?: Also note that colonizers who haven't participated in any of the last three colonizations will be moved to the retirement list. Quite frankly, I'm doing this primarily because I have to post each of these notices by hand (I don't have a bot, and sure could use one), and it takes a long time to post to the pages of people who are inactive in IC and even on Uncyclopedia. If you're put on the retirement list and want back on the active list, simply post a request on the IC talk page.

KEEP CHECKING THE IC TALK PAGE: Many important decisions and updates are made and/or described on the IC talk page that are never posted on user talk pages.

POST COMMENTS ON IC TALK. As usual, if you post them on your talk page, I'll likely never see them.


WHY'S REPLACEMENT NEED: A special added reminder that I, Why do I need to provide this? aka Compassrose IC Buccaneer Admiral WHY??? (stratagems) , am only interim director of IC and need a replacement. My intention was to lead IC just long enough to get it revived, which is a major part of the reason I took the title Buccaneer Admiral instead of Admiral of the Fleet, which is the official title of the head of Imperial Colonization. I plan to abandon ship retire shortly after midnight (UTC) on Saturday, 17 April 2010. I would really like someone to work with me on the current colonization, and I will be happy to assist whoever replaces me during the transition--I do not plan to leave IC, only retire as head. If you're interested, post a note at IC Admiral of the Fleet needed.

Happy colonizations! WHY???PuppyOnTheRadio 18:32, March 24, 2010 (UTC)

edit Vote now for Colonisation

Hello ladies, gentlemen, and other,

As you may be aware we have now reached the point where April's Colonisation, Discordianism, has been successfully moved to mainspace, and we are currently voting on our colonisation for May.

As I have been press-ganged encouraged strongly to take the reigns of IC, I'm sending this out to remind all current and previous members of IC to vote on next months colonisation. Voting is taking place here as we speak. As of 1st of May I will be announcing the page that will get our tender mercies, so I encourage you to vote - or nominate - now.

Good luck, and may the farce be with you!

                              Puppy's talk page00:40, June 5, 2009 Tuesday, 03:35, Apr 27 2010 UTC

Addendum
Discordianism has been added to VFH. Go, read, enjoy, vote.                               Puppy's talk page00:40, June 5, 2009 Wednesday, 09:45, Apr 28 2010 UTC

edit Avast me hearties!

Colony Potato
By the powers! this e'er be fer a reminder o' tha great, grand Imperial Colonization be startin' up again!

Whether you be a sprog or a privateer we be expectin' ya ta come 'round an participate in this sweet trade lessen' you be a lily-livered squiffy, scallywag, or scurvy dog thar.


Aye! ~ Buccaneer Happytimes. Happytimes_pi.gif


The current project: Dinosaur

Now in the writing phase
(Oh UN:IC, how your rules are now broken....)
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