User talk:Jedravent

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I'll archive this when it gets really long. --Sir OCdt Jedravent CUN UmP VFH PLS ACS WH 17:49, 30 September 2007 (UTC)

edit Welcome!

Hello, Jedravent, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for nooblets:

If you read anything at all, make it the above two links. If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, try these:

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button (Button sig) above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Dump, or add the following: {{help}} to this page along with a message and someone will come along and help you if they can. Again, welcome!  —Braydie 23:13, 5 December 2006 (UTC)

edit HowTo:Convince People You're a Heterosexual Male

Thanks for your vote!

has awarded you the
Neat Order of the Closet
for voting
HowTo:Convince People You're a Heterosexual Male
Wear It With Pride!

You big homo.

I dunno why it's all skew here... it works everywhere else. How queer. ^_^ BerogenVFH 15:42, 3 January 2007 (UTC)

edit No reason

Newcookie Bradaphraser has awarded you a cookie!
Now go play in traffic.

And I'm CERTAINLY not giving this to you for whoring my article in the IRC.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 23:57, 3 January 2007 (UTC)

edit No reason either

Newcookie Todd Lyons has awarded you a cookie!
Now go play in traffic.

And this CERTAINLY has nothing to do with you voting for me for Writer of the Year, though I'm very pleased and thankful obviously. :) --Sir Todd GUN WotM MI UotM NotM MDA VFH AotM Bur. AlBur. CM NS PC (talk) 14:17, 5 January 2007 (UTC)

And I'd like to use this opportunity to hijack Todd's cookie and say thanks for the vote on UOTY. :) -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb (talk to me)

edit Now, Turn Left!

This one has a good reason

Brigadier Sir Mordillo Icons-flag-il GUN UotY WotM FP UotM AotM MI3 AnotM VFH +S 07:48, 8 January 2007 (UTC)

edit Bang!

The victory bells(?) have rang!
NeedABrain thanks you for voting on Onomatopoeia

herr doktor needsAcharge Rocket [scream!] 22:09, 17 January 2007 (UTC)

edit Thanks For The Vote

Mewhenreadingstupidstuff Zombiebaron thanks you for supporting him to become admin.
I was even more lazy, I stole this from Braydie.

Sorry about the clutter this template causes. --Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 00:19, 22 January 2007 (UTC)

edit Thanks for the nomination!

--Alksubsig.gifAlksub - VFH CM WA RV {talk} 08:07, 2 February 2007 (UTC)

edit Thank you!

Raygun NeedABrain has awarded you a pair of rayguns! Raygun2
For voting on HowTo:Make Cheesy Sci-Fi.
"Now remember: the blue stuns, the yellow disintegrates and the red destroys the universe (not yet been tested)."

-- herr doktor needsAcharge Rocket [scream!] 17:36, 9 February 2007 (UTC)

edit Thanks!

Dudley.a El Zoof has awarded you a special 3D holographic edition of the List of one letter words starting with A!
For voting on List of one letter words starting with A. If you hadn't guessed.
Soon: List of one letter words starting with A II: The Sequel - List of one letter words starting with I

El Zoof 00:31, 12 February 2007 (UTC)

edit Asplode!!

Zeeky Gneomi has awarded you some hot stuff to jihad your own ride! Zeeky
For voting on Jihad My Ride.
"Never forget: Jihad is not all about war. It is about creating cool stuff and making cars look better. Yo jihad yo!!"

edit Hello, Jedi Ravent

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to contact Sannse @ to give her your address and receive the prize money. Please be aware, that should you accept and fail this mission, Uncyclopedia will disavow all knowledge of your existence. This message will self destruct when the internet aslpodes.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 13:23, 16 February 2007 (UTC)

I've not heard from you yet, and would like to get the prizes (yes, more than just the cash!) sent tomorrow. Let me know if the warm glow of winning the premier competition on Uncyclopedia was enough, or if you want the goodies. Thanks -- sannse@fandom (talk) 08:53, 22 February 2007 (UTC)

edit Thank you!

Tlntshow Congratulation! You are now happy owner of new proud fat kid with an Accordion from El Zoof! Tlntshow
Much felicitous appreciations for happy double nice good voting for HowTo:Stop Playing the Accordion

--El Zoof 00:58, 22 February 2007 (UTC)

edit We shall never forget

~Jewriken.GIF 16:54, 4 March 2007 (UTC)

edit meh

AtomicPrizeAvatar Atomic Disturbance would like to thank you for voting for
UnNews:Boy subjected to harsh criticism, cries like little girl.

The Power Is Yours!
449px-Crying boy
I'm glad you liked the article. I'm also really glad I like pie. I can't even imagine hating pie. I mean... Come on, really, who hates pie? Seriously, I would loose all my respect for a person, even if it was Stephen Hawking, if he didn't like pie. Anyway, thanks. --AtomDsig.png 20:48, 9 March 2007 (UTC)

edit Thanks!

The-golden-chainsaw Welcome to the Chaingang from El Zoof! Now go cut your head off - safely!
Thanks for voting for HowTo:Cut Your Own Head Off With a Chainsaw

--El Zoof 10:24, 10 March 2007 (UTC)

edit Thanks for the vote!

8ball-inside For voting for her article, UnBooks:Choose Your Own Adventure,
Sanns-sig has awarded you:
The inside of a magic 8-ball. Now all your choices will be easy.

edit Thanks for the Support!

Thanks for your support in featuring HowTo:Construct a Federation Starship. It's much appreciated! :) - Enzo Aquarius 21:11, 26 March 2007 (UTC)

edit Mmmmm Children

Walgreen33 The Premier has awarded you a coupon
for 50% off of 1 child with the purchase of
3 children at equal or lesser value!!
Presented for your vote and getting Walgreens Drug Store featured.
In Soviet Russia, SpacerSpacerPremierTomMayfairChe RedPhone Unsoc Hammer and sickle thanks YOU!!
Offer Expires 12/21/2012

SpacerSpacerPremierTomMayfairChe RedPhone Unsoc Hammer and sickle 02:33, 6 April 2007 (UTC)

edit Ta.

120px-Olivin Zahnstein Thanks for voting for Uluru on VFH. Here's a rock. 120px-Olivin Zahnstein
And a second one. Don't you feel special?

--El Zoof 07:32, 9 April 2007 (UTC)

edit UnNews:Noob Gets PWNED

I suppose I ought to thank you for voting on my highly acclaimed art-icle

Newcookie Somebody has awarded you a cookie!
Now go play in traffic.

there. LeatherboundbooksTalkContributions 23:49, 1 May 2007 (UTC)

edit Thanks!

Haywain For voting for her article, The British Class System,
Sanns-sig has awarded you:
A print of Constable's Haywain. Now your true class will be seen by all.

edit Cheers!

Dry Martini NeedABrain has awarded you a Dry Martini!
For voting on HowTo:Run Away From Fat Ladies

Everything goes easier after this.

-- herr doktor needsAcharge Rocket [scream!] 03:09, 4 May 2007 (UTC)

edit 2 in a row, eh?

Freeze, evil-doer!!!
Black &amp; White Cookies
You have be
some black an
For voting on The 
en awarded
d white cookies
Black And White Man
Now sing along: “Ebony, Ivory, living in perfect harmony!”

--herr doktor needsAcharge Rocket [scream!] 04:12, 7 May 2007 (UTC)

Tory poster Congratulations

Thank you for voting on Evolution of an Uncyclopedia editor. You have been awarded a meaningless template which was adapted slightly from an equally meaningless one by another user! You may now feel part of the Evolver Club, even though the writer has no idea who you are and is only giving you this so you vote for his articles again.

edit I'm a bit confused

by this edit. Did you intend that as a For? User:Wehpudicabok/sig 04:08, 20 May 2007 (UTC)

edit Thank You

Sorry I'm late here is your tea--SIR T H A T G U Y H U F F E D M E Snowman throw a snowball Snowman 11:00, 23 May 2007 (UTC)

edit LEGO

For voting on my Lego Assassination Image on VFP!

Sliffy thanks you!
I so totally stole this box

Now sing along: “Ebony, Ivory, living in perfect harmony!”

so sayeth Sliferjam ~ Talk * Sock * Jam * Gallery * Fearless Fosdick? Jambow 15:22, 27 May 2007 (UTC)

edit Thank you!

So I'm too lazy to make an actual template. Sue me! Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 14:08, 28 May 2007 (UTC)

edit Global Cooling

180px-The Earth seen from Apollo 17-white In recognition of your contribution toward maintaining a humourous atmosphere on Uncyclopedia.

Thank you for keeping Uncyclopedia cool.

- Sir Roger 06:32, 31 May 2007 (UTC)

edit You reviewed My Little Pony

You gave it a resounding review, thank you.

GoldenShower Rejoice, Jedravent! You have been entitled to the
Golden Shower Award
For donating high quality material to the Pee Review.

Now it's on VFH. It's not doing so well. Every vote counts!-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 20:29, 19 June 2007 (UTC)

edit THANK'D!!

Thank you very much!! --THINKER 06:46, 22 June 2007 (UTC)

edit Poo Lit Surprise Judging

Glad to see you've volunteered! Now's your chance to sign up for your preferred Category, whichever that may be. Head over to the project page and put your name down where you want it. Thanks in advance. I'll be keeping in touch over the course of the competition, so stay tuned and feel free to hit me up on my talk page should you need to. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 16:04, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

edit A slightly belated thank you

-- 15Mickey20 (talk to Mickey)  19:05, 26 June 2007 (UTC)

edit Hey!

Look's like you've taken an intrest in editing Grueslayer. would you like to be an implementr? Once youhave created enough pages, or made enough edits, I'll see if Trar or Emmzee can let you in. --Lt. High Gen. Grue The Few The Proud, The Marines 00:11, 7 July 2007 (UTC)

edit Grueslayer

If you're going to edit Grueslayer, remember, no Eurgs. This is GRUEslayer. We already have an Eurg page, and we only need one. Once you're an official Implementor, i'll show you that page. Consult the Grueslayer talk page archives for more information on this subject.

Also, welcome to the team! --Trar (talk|contribs|grueslayer) Mchammer 16:07, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

Hey, I already did this! --Lt. High Gen. Grue The Few The Proud, The Marines 16:43, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

edit PLS Judging Instructions: Have a Gander

I'm sending you this because you are signed up to judge the Poo Lit Surprise. If there has been some accident or mistake, and you no longer want to judge, please tell me as soon as possible. If you're still good to go, here are the instructions. First, read all the articles in your specified category. Second, judge them. Judge how you like, as long as it's at least somewhat fair and based on merit. And C, post your top 5 articles here, in order: User:ENeGMA/PLS Judging Hit me up on my talk page should these rules not cognizate within you. Thank you again for your continued cooperation in the balletic train wreck that is the Poo Lit Surprise. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 01:28, 9 July 2007 (UTC)

edit PLS Judging Reminder

Let's get those results in soon, lest I have to bump from the list and find someone else. Thanks. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 14:12, 16 July 2007 (UTC)

edit You Judges the PLS! And you didn't fuck it up! Congratulations!

Thanks for taking the time out of your busy schedule to read articles for me for no pay. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 20:26, 27 July 2007 (UTC)

edit hello from new user T20racerman

Hi there. You added a welcome to my page, so I'm returning the favour - Hi there! My first attempt at a page is Suzuki as I'm a bit of a suzuki nut who builds, restores and races them. Let me know if i've got the right idea.... Thanks T20racerman 21:17, 19 August 2007 (UTC)

edit cool

Bomb shelter You are presented with one (1) bomb shelter for voting
for DOHS Anti-Terrorism Regulations.
In the event of a terrorist attack, simply place your bomb
in this handy (and stylish!) container to protect it from harm.

enjoy! --SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 01:22, 23 September 2007 (UTC)

edit Come to the Grueslayer Talk Page

You are an implementor on GS. We are having a vote for the fate of GS Implementor and Creator Ranks. Come vote on Game Talk:Grueslayer! I voted, so come vote too! Please. User:Uncyclopedian/sig

edit Comrade

Red Ninjastar Thank you for supporting me for
dictatorship at the VFS. Now my
diabolical scheme for domination
can commence. You Are A True

~SpacerSpacerPremierTomMayfairChe RedPhone Unsoc Hammer and sickle


edit PLS judging

Heya! I remember you entered in the 3rd PLS, and you judged in the 4th for the Best Noob Article category. Well, the next PLS is in three months, and I'm in the process of getting things in order. Would you like to judge again? --Hotadmin4u69 [TALK] 22:52, 11 October 2007 (UTC)

edit hey

k thx bai Sir Groovester | Contributions | Talk Page 08:18, 12 October 2007 (UTC)

edit Audio

I audio'd your UnNews, like I said.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 03:41, 14 October 2007 (UTC)

edit better late than never

Che Ape

Reverend Zim_ulator says: "There are coffee cup stains on this copy, damnit! Now that's good UnJournalism."

Welcome to UnNews, Jedravent, and thank you for contributing some crap, or otherwise attracting my attention. For a quick introduction about how you can write a decent or better UnNews article, please take a minute read our spiffy new Style Guide.

I am your humble servant (in your dreams), and if I may be of help to you, please leave me a note on my talk page.

Good things that can happen to you

You can win awards and prizes! You can become a better writer by subjecting your articles to the scrutiny of UnNews critique machine or UnCanninator shit article detection system. You can become a thorn in the side of Journalism as a whole. You can get promotions, ribbons, and free crockery! You can write stuff your mom would be ashamed to show her friends.

What happened to my article?

If you've submitted an article, and it's disappeared, I may have mercy-moved it to your user space. This means I've probably left a message on your talk page, likely in close proximity to this very message, explaining why.

Your article may have been tagged for ICU if it has significant problems meeting our criteria, or I may have deleted it because you did not register as a user.

Finally, maybe you just pissed me off. I mean, I know I'm a Roshi, and I'm supposed to be all "Zen" about everything, but I have bad days too, you know?

UnNews Audio

If you are interested in doing an UnNews audio, check this out.

UnNews UnFunnies

At present, I create UnCartoons for UnNews all by my onesies, for better or worse. Now, I will never claim that I am a good cartoonist. Fortunately, the internet provides us a way to do all sorts of things simply and easily. I found, a great site to create cartoons with a minimum of talent.

This document is an ongoing effort by me to enhance the obfuscation coefficient of Uncyclopedia; productive changes, and criticism are welcome. Cheers! The Right and Left Reverend Major Sir Zimbuddha Rev. Zim (Talk) Get saved! 17:38, March 28, 2010 (UTC) Zimbuddha Rev. Zim (Talk) Get saved! 21:13, 14 October 2007 (UTC)

edit Thank you

Busta Thank you for helping me get my first ever featured article!--Dr. Fenwick 07:36, 20 October 2007 (UTC)

edit Excellent voting

Copyright question mark
Thank you!
For voting for Books never written!
Cainad thinks you deserve no less than a beige, green-bordered thank-you note for your support.
So that is what you get.

Seriously though, thanks. Leaving the article un-featured as a gimmick seemed... silly.

--The Acceptable Thinking cap small Cainad Sacred Chao (Fnord) 02:31, 2 November 2007 (UTC)

edit Thank you

American species2
Thank you for voting for American (species)!

As thanks, I wanted to give you an actual species of Americanus, but, as I discovered, human sex slaves are apparently illegal, so this patriotic iguana will have to do.

Sincerely, CUN RA Talk to me _

--Acolyte CUN RA My cat is better than Benson talk stalk 03:36, 2 November 2007 (UTC)

edit UnScripts:Secrets of Uranus

Thanks! I added to the scene accordingly...  –  FuhQ.gifFuhQ  ZDsig.gifZDsig Sheenicon.gif (ooh!) (aah!) ...·º•ø®@» LEG CUN GUN DUN 04:44, 9 November 2007 (UTC)

edit The villains begrudgingly thank you

Thanks for the votes! Sir Groovester | Contributions | Talk Page 03:30, 17 November 2007 (UTC)

edit Many Thanks!

For your vote in N00b of the month... MrN Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 22:06, 30 November 2007 (UTC)

edit HA!

I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate the Fairly Oddparents reference in your edit summary. Good show.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 20:09, 2 December 2007 (UTC)

That is, good show in the British sense of the term. The program was decent, though.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 20:12, 2 December 2007 (UTC)
You really think so? I thought the production values could've been better. - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 19:06, Dec 4

edit Why, hello, sir!

I must say, you look intelligent. Perhaps you'd like to partake in some of my Miracle Tonic? Guaranteed to cure what ails ya! Got a cold? Going bald? High mortgage rates? No problem for my miracle tonic!

Moonshine The Led Balloon has awarded you with a FREE* case of Honest Jim's patented Miracle Tonic.
*Not actually free. Side effects may include just about any horrible diseases we can come up with.

Thanks again for voting, - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 19:05, Dec 4

edit Cheers

SmashSpeckys MrN9000 has awarded you with this rather nicely coloured boxy thing to thank you for voting and helping to get The Color Problem featured on the front page.
*Please do not mention the colour/color problem. It's not an issue. Really.

MrN Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 17:23, Dec 6

edit *STAR WARS theme plays...*

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away....

It is a period of Galactic unrest. Star Wars was nominated for VFH, but nearly failed, thanks to the efforts of the evil lord Darth Vader.

However, during the nomination, Princess Prince TheLedBalloon managed to steal secret plans to the Empire's ultimate weapon, the DEATH STAR.

Pursued by the Empire's sinister agents, he races home aboard his starship, custodian of the stolen plans that can save his people and restore freedom to the galaxy...

I can't believe it finally got featured, either. Thanks for voting!

Thanks again for voting, - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 01:57, Dec 7

edit Have a not-shitty Christmas!

WinterBreakCalendar Heya, The Led Balloon here, wishing you merry Christmas, or any other holiday you feel like celebrating. Just remember what it's all really about: NO WORK, NO SCHOOL, FREE STUFF!!!
Here's to hoping your school(or work) calendar for December doesn't look too much like this...

Merry Christmas, - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 00:31, Dec 17

edit Bloody Pagans

Pagans, the Whole Lot of Yous

Premier Tom Mayfair has been a naughty boy this year, but he still deserves a kiss from under the mistletoe. His external organ is fair game.

SpacerSpacerPremierTomMayfairChe RedPhone Unsoc Hammer and sickle

edit awesome

You are presented with one (1) package of
Red Baron French Bread PizzaTM for your vote for
that article involving flying things..
Please note that Red Baron microwaveable pizzasTM
may cause loss of altitude or engine failure.

enjoy!--SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 18:54, 31 December 2007 (UTC)

edit Sorry I'm late

Enjoy your late thankin'.

SnowySnow The Led Balloon thanks you for helping him to spread awareness of the plight of Ogle.
Beware the white stuff!

- P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 04:18, Jan 14

edit Thanks for the VOTE VOTE VOT!!!


Your vote for Grass in the Mist II has earned you a romantic evening with Gizelda, this year's winner of Africa's "Sexiest blade of grass of the year" award!!! Enjoy yourself, and good luck figuring out how to have sex with a blade of grass!

Thank'ee! :) --THE 18:20, 25 January 2008 (UTC)

edit PLS Judging

I'm sending you this because you are signed up to judge the Poo Lit Surprise. If you no longer want to judge or are incapable of doing so, please tell me as soon as possible. If you're still good to go then here are the instructions:

First, read all of the articles in your specified category. Second, judge them. Judge how you like, as long as it's at least fair and based on merit (one suggestion would be to use the Pee Review format). Post your top 5 articles here. Hit me up on my talk page for questions, comments, if these rules are not cognizant within you, or of you don't know what the word "cognizant" means.

Thank you again for your valued participation in the balletic train wreck that is the Poo Lit Surprise! --Hotadmin4u69 [TALK] 23:29, 27 January 2008 (UTC)

Just a reminder, that all judging for the PLS is due by tomorrow. I'm a bit concerned that you haven't finished judging yet. Please get back to me. --Hotadmin4u69 [TALK] 00:14, 10 February 2008 (UTC)

edit HEY YOU

VOTE AT THE GRUESLAYER TALK PAGE FOR THE FATE OF GRUESLAYER PvP! NOW! --Trar (talk|contribs|grueslayer) Mchammer 00:13, 12 November 2008 (UTC)

edit Grueslayer

Well, are you going to help me revive it? --Trar (talk|contribs|grueslayer) Mchammer 09:43, 25 April 2009 (UTC)

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