User talk:Irritable of contents

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edit Welcome to Uncyclopedia

Spike the Dog (06b)

Spike is a grumpy old dog. You can stroke his fur, or you can be smitten by his stick. It is up to you.

Hello, Irritable of contents, and welcome to Uncyclopedia. This is a wiki (a collection of pages anyone can edit). Words in blue are "links" and can be clicked to take you to another page. This wiki is for comedy. It pretends it's Wikipedia, but we make people laugh, not bore them. If you aren't interested in a fake encyclopedia but in writing fake news stories, we have UnNews, and there are other projects for scripts, lyrics, how-to guides, and so on.

You can create your own article. For starters, create it under your own name; for example, User:Irritable of contents/Bedbug. (The red instead of blue is a link to a page that doesn't yet exist.) We have a list of articles that need to be created. You can help without writing articles; just read articles and, if you see an improvement in writing or in comedy, jump in and edit it. In fact, you can help without writing at all, such as organizing, watching for vandals, or even greeting other new users.

To write articles, you need a sense of humor and an ability to write good English. We all have strengths and weaknesses and you can get help in any area. But everyone needs an ability to work with other people. Be polite, positive, and helpful toward others, and assume others are doing the same toward you. Here are some pages that might help:

Scotty and the bloody knife
Writing funny articles
Understanding Uncyclopedia: About usBeginner's GuideHow to editOur projectsGetting ideasHelp menu
Understanding Funny: How To Be Funny And Not Just StupidFunny and not just stupid imagesChoosing words creatively
What to avoid: VandalismCyberbullyingWriting about yourself or your palsDramaOveruse of initial quotationsOveruse of lists
What people have asked for: ArticlesPictures
Additional help: Get spelling/grammar helpFind or become a co-authorHow to write an UnNewsAsk an AdminGet feedback on your work
For personal help
  • The administrators are willing to help you, and several Uncyclopedians are willing to adopt you.
  • I will watch this page for a while and will know if you edit it. Afterward, you can contact me on my own talk page.
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I hope you enjoy it here and write a lot of funny stuff! Spıke Ѧ 19:44 5-May-14

edit Operation Arm Stretch Wrong

I don't begin to understand the joke at High fructose corn syrup. Spıke Ѧ 19:44 5-May-14

Well, that was an interesting walk through the mine field of English words, though it always seemed it wasn't exactly about anything. And now you have deleted it. You might look through How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid (never mind the title) and Choice of Words to see what we recommend to new authors. Spıke Ѧ 23:47 5-May-14

My shit does certainly stink. I'll take your advice read the link and work on making one funny sentence before two. Irritable of contents (talk) 03:07, May 6, 2014 (UTC)

Well, you are back in with a new, and completely different, stream-of-consciousness. Unfortunately, it is hard for the reader to keep in mind that the title of the article is High fructose corn syrup. There is a cameo appearance of corn and sweetness, but not a clever explanation of the History of the stuff. Try doing what I do: Read the corresponding Wikipedia article with your tongue in the same place In Cheek and write a clever weave between what you've got now and the dry real world: Make it not just offbeat but make it relate to the truth in a way the reader wouldn't have thought of for himself. Spıke Ѧ 18:52 8-May-14

Thanks for the help, I hope the other shorter entries I've added for coconut and AK-47 are funnier than that. Irritable of contents (talk) 19:19, May 8, 2014 (UTC)

The sense of humor is evident, but the page as a whole needs to hang together better. For example, read in context with your Change Summary, I can guess that "Turtle Devastation Wave" is the translation of Kamehameha. Just looking at the page and sharing the ignorance of the average reader with an interest in Coconuts, the result is unsavory Word Soup. Spıke Ѧ 19:40 8-May-14

I had a feeling Turtle Devastation Wave was too obscure a translation; I don't think they even refer to it as that in the Dragon Ball Z dubs. Irritable of contents (talk) 19:48, May 8, 2014 (UTC)

edit For God's sake

We do jokes here, Tiger, not riddles! It does no good to include a Change Summary by which the reader might discover the meanings of all the puns you wove into that latest paragraph. The goal is to write an article that amuses the reader without requiring any additional research on his part. (Likewise Kal-Elmo at Superman, where the preceding Oscar Wilde quote should go away; and is "the letter LL" a typo, or another hidden Easter Egg?) Cheers! Spıke Ѧ 00:54 9-May-14

If corn syrup as the force doesn't fly; I'll just admit defeat on that one and move on. Irritable of contents (talk) 15:37, May 9, 2014 (UTC)

edit L. Ron Hubbard

Thanks for reverting yourself. I had patrolled/approved your original edit, but you are right to revert it, as it is unlikely that the reader's interest in Hubbard will be accompanied by interest in The Silmarillion (or your apparent interest in everything!) — thus, it was pretty cryptic. Spıke Ѧ 17:17 17-May-14

PS--Sorry to revert you at Al Gore: Articles that have been voted onto our main page are presumed not to need help being funny, such as being taken in new directions. When they are Overtaken By Events, it is acceptable to bring them up-to-date. Spıke Ѧ 19:40 17-May-14

It's cool; I think the bit about Butlerian Jihadist terorist cell phones could probably work on one of the 9-11 pages. I still can't think of anything to say about L Ron.

edit UnNews:Mexican develops apple-based fuel‎‎

In UnNews even more than in the encyclopedia, most articles are written as a direct take-off on real-world events. Although in this case the Uncyclopedia reader will probably not be able to read the {{Source}} to find out what really happened, Mr. Argüello certainly was not nominated for a Nobel, "the fasted [sic?] way to solved [sic] the worlds [sic] hunger problem" is a non sequitur, as the news has nothing to do with hunger (except perhaps to cause some), and has nothing to do with bacteria. The clandestine humor theme is that the smiling Mr. Argüello's innovation will probably fail for the same reason that previous food-to-fuel schemes are failing, because it changes not just the price of fuel but of other things, in the other direction. Its theme is not to be a container for random flights-of-fancy. With apologies, therefore, I have undone your edits. Spıke Ѧ 20:47 22-May-14

Thanks, for the help. I think I'll take a break for a while; while I'm still ahead. I'm glad uncyclopedia is still around unlike Encyclopedia Dramatica; I couldn't even look at their site to see if it had a news section. Irritable of contents (talk) 03:10, May 23, 2014 (UTC)

edit Pointless redirects

When our Valued Customer types one subject and is confronted with a page on a different subject, by way of equating the two — for instance, if he types Bush and gets an article on Moron — that is not called a "joke" but a "prank." Uncyclopedia is a satire encyclopedia, not a knock-knock joke. As one Uncyclopedia put it, who I am sure is now tending to a toddler, "Don't crack wise with the navigation tools." Cheers! Spıke Ѧ 23:42 26-May-14

edit Barack Obama's birth

Hello! You came upon an article with a single comedy strategy (fact-based ridicule of both sides of a real-world political dispute) and basically a single author (me). It does not need a tug in the direction of zaniness, and it does not need initial quotations. Sorry. Spıke Ѧ 23:11 21-Jun-14

edit Like the name

Like the handle. Wish I had come up with that! --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 19:56, July 27, 2014 (UTC)

edit RationalWiki

Thanks for your edits to the article. May Sophia shine upon you. Sir ScottPat (converse) White Ensign Scotland Flag 1 Compassrose VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 10:45, October 26, 2014 (UTC)

Glad I could help; Uncyclopedia was how I learned of Sir Richard Dawkin's blog/Memory Gamma. It appears he wants the honorific that eluded Darwin and that Sir Stephen Hawking's refused to be given in the 90's; because Hawking cared more about the rest of the scientific community receiving funding than aggrandizing his own image. Irritable of contents (talk) 04:54, November 13, 2014 (UTC)
"Uncyclopedia was how I learned of Sir Richard Dawkin's blog/Memory Gamma". We could use that in a future site promotion! --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 22:06, November 25, 2014 (UTC)

edit Darth Vader

Please go back and fix the grammar! Spıke Ѧ 09:19 30-Oct-14

You are putting a lot of texture into this article! However, the Intro needs to be an Intro and not begin with a minor fact about Vader and jump into the middle of the story. Please arrange the photos better, spread 'em out, and put more on the left side. I personally think that breaking out of the "encyclopedia" cover and wisecracking with your reader has run its course, but you might disagree. And do reread it for correct possessives. Cheers! Spıke Ѧ 23:25 1-Nov-14

Aye, aye capn. I'll be a wee bit busy the next couple weeks, but I'll definitely take care of it soon. Irritable of contents (talk) 23:37, November 1, 2014 (UTC)

I am tired of hearing from so many Uncyclopedians that lame excuse about an alleged Real Life! Spıke Ѧ 23:43 1-Nov-14

On today's edits:

  1. Way too much rape. Rape as a meme is Meme Humor, and Rape Humor is not very funny, and is very unfunny to a small minority of readers.
  2. Please do not send the reader to Wikipedia or other sites to gather evidence to understand your points. Instead, write humor that stands on its own.
  3. I hope that these tight little coils and conundrums all relate to Star Wars in some cryptic way. If not, you are still "writing riddles and not jokes." Spıke Ѧ 04:14 4-Nov-14
I generally try to not normally joke about child soldiers, fill in the blank holocausts and rape; cause it's about as easily done right as landing on the sun. I-III and Evangelion have strangely similar subject matter for being polar opposites. Force impregnate Shmee Skywalker does sort of sound almost exactly like Palpatine forcibly impregnated Shmee, using the force; artificial wombs and Pinnochio are definitely way less creepy than that. Come to think about it, is she the only Slave who knows her families actual last name?

I left the cracked article as the only link and noted Assaj Ventresses role in being a disposable Sith from a disposed of draft for Episode II. The explanation on robot dagobas and star stupas is about as long as the actual mention of Dagoba is in the movies now. Irritable of contents (talk) 17:09, November 4, 2014 (UTC)

edit Russian Reversal - Orion Girls

Fucking brilliant - I couldn't come up with anything. I really couldn't come up with anything for the article of it except about SHRAN: THE INCREDIBLE ANDORIAN FROM OUTER SPACE! The rest was pieced together out of a random word arranger put out by the postmodernist philosophy club. Begege (talk) 07:04, November 13, 2014 (UTC)

edit Star Trek Enterprise

Please go back and add apostrophes, perhaps a comma, and find less turgid phrasing than "would have liked to have known." Also, "landing on a comet" will be forgotten in a month (though this begs for an UnNews). Write humor, not riddles. Spıke Ѧ 16:14 13-Nov-14

edit Initial quotations

Please read or reread UNQUOTE. Wikipedia doesn't have initial quotations, Encyclopedia Brittanica doesn't have them, we don't need two on every Uncyclopedia article. On your new one at Hikaru Sulu, I made sport of Takei's homosexuality at the end of the article, in a way that even people who didn't know it can appreciate. Your addition of a cryptic initial quotation doesn't help. Write jokes, not riddles. Spıke Ѧ 16:48 14-Nov-14

edit Sam Beckett

I finally figured out who that was and why you kept putting him on the page... I'm a Trekkie and I like Joss Whedon, Tolkien, Heinlein, and C.S. Lewis - other than that my sci-fi/fantasy knowledge is nill. Begege (talk) 20:17, November 14, 2014 (UTC)

You should check out Lexx, it's a hilariously awesome sex filled German Canadian dark fantasy sci-fi. It features a zombie assassin with a seemingly infinitely long vorpal grappling hook, a sex slave that carrys a horny robot head, a giant insect/penis space ship that kills planets, and Stanley Tweedle; the captain so desperate to get laid he accidentally causes billions of deaths. It also has Barry Bostwick, Tim Curry, Rutger Hower and Malcolm Md Dowell in the first four episodes. After that it's more like the original Star Trek in terms of low budget and widely varying greatness. Irritable of contents (talk) 02:42, November 15, 2014 (UTC)

edit "Infuzzable as in not policeable"

Infuzzable is not a word and makes the article look less encyclopedic. Edits like this, again, are riddles not jokes. You are not amusing the reader by baffling him; you are amusing yourself by making him ponder your meaning. Put yourself at the service of the reader, not vice versa. Spıke Ѧ 01:04 16-Nov-14

edit United States of America

This is a Featured Article that ran on our main page, and is assumed not to need new help in becoming funny; especially when the help includes obscenity that breaks the "encyclopedia" cover, bad grammar that someone will have to repair, and cryptic references to Final Fantasy that someone looking up "United States of America" in our encyclopedia will read as simple random babble. Spıke Ѧ 18:32 21-Nov-14 I should have quit while it was still mostly confusing America for fictional versions of other countries and mixing up the nationalities of American Superhero's and had less Edison. I'll watch the obscenity. Irritable of contents (talk) 18:35, November 21, 2014 (UTC)

edit Editing Featured Articles

Please stop adding sentences to Feature Articles. So far, many of the statements that you've added have little to do with what the articles are about and just seem out of place. These articles were featured because they are cohesive and well-written, and it is very rare that a featured article requires any addition jokes. If you have any questions, feel free to ask me here or contact me on my talk page. :) --Pwn head Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 21:44, November 21, 2014 (UTC)

Indeed; Xamralco, see also the immediately preceding section. Even on articles that are not FAs, today's marathon to see how many of our articles you can mark (in the canine sense) is ill-advised. Even if the product of your word-association game has a contrived rationale (hidden in the Change Summary), the resulting paragraph hangs together worse than it did before.
Now, however, you have hit Captain Obvious, which is another FA, an edit whose only point is that warnings do not work. Spıke Ѧ 22:19 21-Nov-14
Also Stairs. Also Sun. Spıke Ѧ 22:27 21-Nov-14

edit Welcome back from your ban

And you have gone right back to RationalWiki, another Featured Article. I understand that most of what you did is to move a previous edit of yours, added after the article became an FA, to a better place. However: Featured Articles are presumed not to need new help being funny. Especially when the new help requires a link offsite to explain itself. Do not edit Featured Articles. Spıke Ѧ 18:25 25-Nov-14

Only in the shadows of their talk pages shall I lurk unless told otherwise. I also completely ran out of fiction to hate on, including Mr. Fantastic took a stretch, but he deserves it for mocking the thousands of pounds of flaming debris that rain down from destroying alien armadas over New York. That's some 2nd Death Star destruction over Endor class of ignoring physics.

Also out of Wiki's; occasional cryptonazism is more Richard Dawkins that Rational Wiki's problem anyways and is already covered; though the history page or lack there of for Rational Wiki's Methodism suggests otherwise, that would be an excavated ancient Egyptian level riddle, even for wiki hating. No mind control drugs either, seeing as Cracked is ahead of even Wikipedia on that. Perhaps we should accuse Cracked of being The Joker on their page somewhere? The Joker always does get a laugh. Irritable of contents (talk) 20:08, November 25, 2014 (UTC)

edit Vandalism

Once again: Adding junk categories to dozens of articles, typically [Category:Gay], providing in the Change Summary an explanation of how it all makes sense, then patting yourself on the back, is vandalizing this wiki. It results in the insertion of material no one will understand; and no one will pore through the History expecting to find an explanation. Spıke Ѧ 23:30 6-Dec-14

The fewer words, the more difficult. Categories are beyond me. Irritable of contents (talk) 07:12, December 18, 2014 (UTC)

edit Colossus of Barbie

I reverted your edits as the article is a feature (that green smidge in the left corner). The Good, the Bad and the Ugly. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 21:39, March 24, 2015 (UTC)

edit Sega CD

You've done some excellent edits lately! Here, you removed an Intro that was so opinionated that a reader wouldn't have laughed because he would have been wondering, "What's with the author?" Cheers! Spıke Radiomicrophone20:37 8-Jan-16

Thanks, it's been fun. I tried making one more about the downfall of sonic the hedgehog; I saw Why?:Does Everyone Hate Sonic the Hedgehog and was thinking of the parallels between Sonic's leap to 3D and the Star Wars prequels. Irritable of contents (talk) 23:21, January 8, 2016 (UTC)

edit Fantastic Four

With apologies, I reverted you here. I was trying to tell a relatively tight story about an "action film" project descending into a "chick flick," which was made less tight by being tugged in many different directions. Spıke Radiomicrophone19:55 19-Feb-16

Too many different narratives can be bad if The Phantom Menace taught me and George Lucas nothing else (I mean he should have just adapted Rashomon like he did with Forbidden Fortress). I'm also sad that The Incredibles is going to be the best FF movie until the rights are sold back to Disney by an A.I. simulation of Rupert Murdoch in 203X. I'm just glad I didn't go out on a dud, that always sucks. Irritable of contents (talk) 20:15, February 19, 2016 (UTC)

edit Computer programming

The non-typing future of computer programming is a tangent that would be better as a section of its own at the end of the article than as the article's second sentence. Occurring there, it draws the reader into a fan-fiction world before the article has begun to amuse him. Spıke Radiomicrophone00:40 4-May-16

I was actually having some second thoughts about that one myself. I guess it could work as a future section, but it wasn't really opulently wasteful or ridiculously unrealistic enough for my faux techno millionare art collector shtick, seeing as there actually are intractable holograms like blue fairy out of Japan, and president Obama's apparently working something he thinks it appropriate to equate with Iron Man armor; expecting those rocket boots not to just rip off someones limbs in flight doing the splits, or for them to get ten pounds fatter like Michael Keaton and be unable to fit in it. I was thinking of equating, Airplane II with Forbidden Planet, as the latter really does have most time saving user interface; and the former TV's Steve Trevor; but it's kind of a stretch though like that The Day the Earth Stood Still bit I did a whiles back. I think I'll just self revert cause it's not that good; and I'll just walk off on a bit of a dud with that one.

edit Cgi-bin

Do you think the CGI bin article should just be for CGI? There's an article for books, computers, and television; even had animation before wikiquote, but there isn't one for CGI in particular yet. Irritable of contents (talk) 01:35, May 4, 2016 (UTC)

How many articles and what titles depends on the direction in which the content grows. There are no hard-and-fast rules and I am not knowledgeable at CGI and won't be more than a copy-editor. Just be sure the page organization makes sense — as always, from the reader's point of view. Spıke Radiomicrophone01:53 4-May-16
PS--Apart from what you would like to write about, what the page is about at the current time is the CGI Bin, not CGI in general. If this should change, you can ask me to change the name of a page here or at Uncyclopedia:Request for move. Doing one of these things when ready, rather than just copypasting the text to a new page, preserves the edit history and access to older drafts. Spıke Radiomicrophone02:20 4-May-16
Thanks for the info, I'd definitely prefer keeping the edit history intact. I have the feeling if I tried to make a CGI article in the sandbox, it would just end up ripping off cracked's observations on the goofy cartoon physics of The Terminator and Legolas; who apparently don't weigh anything anymore. Some diet. Irritable of contents (talk) 17:14, May 6, 2016 (UTC)
Similarly, the original theme of the article Q was to anthromorphize the keyboard letter, not to pursue the connection to either Star Trek or Hitchhiker's Guide. Both digressions would be welcome in a trailing section (such as Other Qs) but not as the article's first word that overrides the original author's concept! Consequently, I removed both your new quotation and the existing one. Spıke Radiomicrophone17:29 6-May-16
Sounds good to me, it's cool that there's occasionally quotes outside of the lead right? I need to start deleting more stuff instead of just adding things all the time.
For sandbox creations, don't actually use Uncyclopedia:Sandbox, which anyone can clear at any time, but create an article in your userspace (any page name starting with User:Irritable of contents/). Spıke Radiomicrophone17:30 6-May-16
Thanks, I knew we had our own sandboxes, I just haven't really had any ideas for new articles until now, so I've never really thought about using it before. I need to actually go through and learn all the tags, as well as check out the community pages now that I have more time, the code tag was totally new to me. Irritable of contents (talk) 17:46, May 6, 2016 (UTC)

edit Cruel and unusual punishment

This is a Featured Article, and these are presumed not to be in need of new help being funny. See Sections 16 and 17 above where we told you not to do this. Please check whether the potato is rubber-stamped before editing. Spıke Radiomicrophone17:53 7-May-16

edit Hyperbole at VFD

Thank you for your concurring vote. On the other hand, if you can write an article-length article (such as at User:Irritable of contents/Hyperbole) that is both an example of hyperbole, and funny in ways other than, "You wanted hyperbole, I gave you hyperbole!!!" then we could replace it rather than redirect it to Hyper Bole. Spıke Radiomicrophone20:57 7-May-16

PS--No, I don't think the BILLY MAYS thing would constitute that something extra. When shouting at the reader, it is simply annoying unless the reader happens to have been annoyed by BILLY MAYS and the reminder makes him laugh. Also, when voting anywhere, remember next time to increment your own count. Spıke Radiomicrophone21:01 7-May-16

edit Lois Lane

Sorry, I realized what you were trying to do here and it's pretty good. Now restored, sort of. Spıke Radiomicrophone23:20 9-May-16

Thanks, I realized it still needed some work, now it's just the things Huff Po they've specifically been called out for. I'm sure theirs also an inordinate amount of using google search for "research" that involves Youtube, texting and other short bursts of paid wasted time; but that's not really specific to the news, I think on average it adds up to about two hours everyday for most workers. Irritable of contents (talk) 18:26, May 11, 2016 (UTC)

As we are discussing life at the Daily Planet, it is utterly unimportant to spend time writing a correct rendition of personnel problems on a real website. Keep the humor crisp and concise and do not rely on the reader combing the Edit History to see how poignant your edits were! Spıke Radiomicrophone00:29 12-May-16

edit Ghost Rider

Thank you for trying to do something with the initial quotations here. But what was left, after your cutting, was still what UNQUOTE refers to as "bickering quotations," the author disclosing the Saturday morning cartoon playing out in his head before he begins the job of engaging the reader. Having every conceivable celebrity comment on a burning head is a case of You Have Two Cows (the same joke being permuted rather than throwing truly clever stuff at the reader).

This also applies to the ranty one you wrote that interrupts itself with navel-gazing about being a spoiler. These are all afterwords and should not be the first word! The first one, about other common cases where one finds one's head on fire, should stay; Oscar Wilde is trite and Teddy Kennedy was my choice of alcoholic.

To reply to your Edit Summary, yes, I have seen articles with 13 quotations, as well as lists with hundreds of entries, as their only function is to embolden our anonymous, overnight, horrible writers to add two of their own. Spıke Radiomicrophone00:26 12-May-16

edit Final Fantasy VIII

Again, please read UNQUOTE. Not every article needs an initial quotation, and a quotation comprising faux social commentary, with riddles whose hints are in piped links and in the Edit History, it can do without. Let the article start with humor that jumps out at the reader rather than makes him consult Wikipedia. Spıke Radiomicrophone02:44 14-May-16

edit Glad you stopped at 19

(on VFD). Technically you could have gone to 21, as one current one is grayed out, but it's not nice to take the last cookies. A one-day ban for exceeding this is a hard rule. Spıke Radiomicrophone19:56 14-May-16

I wasn't expecting an entire category I'd want to delete. I still don't get what SuperSkye is despite reading the intro to it's wiki. Did it start here or something? Irritable of contents (talk) 22:11, May 14, 2016 (UTC)

Wikipedia shows nothing; Google shows a channel on, then us, then another Wikia wiki. The problem is that articles about something going on elsewhere on the web are often either advertising (for our readers to go somewhere else instead) or soapboxing or doomed to become same, once Anon gets his licks in. The reason for the limit of 20 is that it fatigues people, and I am fatigued at reading all the swill that you have dredged up. It seems the other voters got fatigued even earlier. You too might return to the top of the page and help move out candidates on which you haven't voted. Spıke Radiomicrophone23:10 14-May-16

I was casually strolling by VFD when I saw the impressively-long list of nominated articles. For a second, I thought that maybe EpicWinner had returned. Chunkles talk ✏️ contribs 15:14, May 15, 2016 (UTC)

edit Elmo's World

Write jokes, not riddles. Adding Richard Dawkins, Jews, and Muslims to the first paragraph of this article will make the reader uninterested in continuing. The Intro needs to set the stage, not get larded up with hidden meanings. Spıke Radiomicrophone17:50 15-May-16

I thought the hell theme was apparent enough with the picture to the right that immediately catches the eye, and that the big religions views were all summarized well with muppets, I admit the parts in parenthesis I should have done without and stuck with just the Abrahamic religions. However I particularly liked Muppetstopheles and the street address from Divine Comedy, and thought that the geography of hell was less obscure than the Mayan underworld and the Spanish names for Aztec furniture. Irritable of contents (talk) 18:58, May 15, 2016 (UTC)

This is also the problem with Ph.D.s driving taxicabs in Santa Clara County. The question is not whether you particularly liked it but whether the general reader of an article on Elmo will feel compelled to continue, or merely feel inadequate. Spıke Radiomicrophone20:02 15-May-16

edit Academic Bowl

Good corrections throughout. Though, ya think someone was trying to be ironic by adding spelling by way of poor academics to Academic Bowl? At any rate, as I often say, illustrating something with poor writing is, at the end of the day, still poor writing. Spıke Radiomicrophone20:09 15-May-16

And good move at Social Darwinism; it related, but the reader probably does not want to be sworn at before developing an interest in the article. By the way, if you find a {{Wikipedia}} stacked up on top of a photo, please find a good place for it, such as to break up a run of text. Spıke Radiomicrophone21:22 15-May-16

edit From the VFD rules

Do not delete any content without authorization. Boldface in the original. Expert3222 is the Poopsmith and will clean up the page, allowing one day so that voters can see what the disposition was and not have to fish through the archives.

Separately, we are having trouble getting people to vote on VFD, and long nominations and votes where you parade your knowledge of the subject aren't helping. Regarding your suggestions for improving the article, just do it. In 1 day. Spıke Radiomicrophone21:54 16-May-16

Sorry about that, I managed to make something out of that rant that I think might work for TNG, I left out the obscure yet factual part where in Geordi's original role is surprisingly similar to LeVar Burton in Reading Rainbow, I think Colbert already did that bit anyways. Irritable of contents (talk) 01:19, May 18, 2016 (UTC)

edit Mississippi

Further to your clean-up here:

  • Quotations (initial or not) that cannot be attributed to anyone in particular but only to "Any liberal" or "Frightened New Yorker" or "Drunk-Redneck" are suspect and should not just be correctly formatted but destroyed if the quote flogs an old stereotype with no clever new twist.
  • Any section entitled "Fun Facts" or the like should be held to the same scrutiny, and deleted if its only humor is in putting random ideas on the page (HTBFANJS). Cheers! Spıke Radiomicrophone00:32 18-May-16

Thanks, fun facts are rarely that, they are even more random than filmography sections. I should have waited to read some Mark Twain so I'd have something to add. Right now there's only a single reference to the river, and his would be a good writing style for me to crib some from, particularly for Mississippi. Irritable of contents (talk) 01:19, May 18, 2016 (UTC)

edit ,

The Intro of this article does a marvelous job of matter-of-factly setting out the complete hogwash on which a very funny article will be based. You prepended an overlong quotation that Bernie Sanders didn't actually say, and Bernie Sanders is two jumps removed from Communism and claims to be something else entirely. That is, before the reader could grasp the theme of the article, you interposed one of your riddles. That ruined it. Spıke Radiomicrophone00:29 20-May-16

There should really be more of a joke than just that there are a lot of commas, that's not even as good as a quote from Captain Kirk about how great the future is because of commas, which is a celebrity endorsement, not a joke. Irritable of contents (talk) 01:34, May 20, 2016 (UTC)

My gripe is not that the quote is not unfunny but that it hijacks an article right at the start and takes it in another direction. Whatever became of your own emerging article? You have a distinctive style (if you could just master the apostrophe) that would shine if extended to article-length. Spıke Radiomicrophone01:38 20-May-16

edit Barack Obama's birth

Would you please not do what I just asked you not to do: Take a complete page with a well-defined comedy concept and yank it in a different direction (despite the guidance in UNQUOTE that any initial quotations need to be clever and not just be a comment on the article) to give yourself the first word. Spıke Radiomicrophone12:07 20-May-16

This topic was really a challenge to come up with anything to add to. I tried making a replacement for the fairly brief and red ink filled cougar page, as I don't think PUMA is really noticeable enough for any other pages; even Donald Trump despite setting the stage for his Bizarro voter base. Evidently the all of the media, Hillary's opponents, and the president unfairly targeted whom clearly knows how to add 2 and 2 together, refuse to bring up the silent condoning of racist schoolyard bullying tactics and the effect that might have on promoting bigotry. Apparently bit of mild underhanded racism is acceptable for a democratic presidential candidate, unlike Bernie Sanders literary erotica which is a deal breaker. Irritable of contents (talk) 13:25, May 20, 2016 (UTC)

I hope not to censor any joke that has a real-life basis on the grounds of ideology. The only hard limit is libel, though see CoW#Extremists on how to write about racism with lightness that will not be mistaken for racism. Obama's nods toward racism while claiming to be doing something else are apt targets for comedy treatment. My reverts of you are solely on comedy value. Rather than straining to "come up with anything to add," study what the page was written to be and help the author achieve that. Again, go back to developing your own article instead of depositing conundrums in someone else's. In other words, write jokes not riddles. Spıke Radiomicrophone14:06 20-May-16

edit Why?:Does Everyone Hate Sonic the Hedgehog

Hi, I reverted you here because you need to give some thought about the article hanging together. Your ideas are fine, but the result is often the original author(s) say something, and you snap back in parentheses. Integrate the two and give the impression that the reader is in an "encyclopedia." That's what we do here, cheers. Spıke Radiomicrophone22:36 21-May-16

It's mostly just that I recently learned there can be parenthesis within parenthesis, which is why I've been opting to misuse and overdo them so much recently; same thing with the em dash. I still can't think of any jokes using small text though. Irritable of contents (talk) 00:50, May 22, 2016 (UTC)

Small text (whispering) breaks the "encyclopedia" cover for the sake of telegraphing the character an editor is portraying, and is usually not worth it. Spıke Radiomicrophone00:56 22-May-16

edit Various

  1. Please don't spend a lot of time converting double-space to single-space between sentences. Those of us who were taught to type on a typewriter rather than on a computer do this by rote. Uncyclopedia renders the text the same either way.
  2. Votes for Honors is languishing lately and could benefit from your vote and brief rationale on which articles should be featured on the website main page. Spıke Radiomicrophone23:26 24-May-16
I was wondering what was up with the double spacing, the variant spellings and grammars always get me, like how PS can be P.S. or PS: or P.S., or ps. I'll definitely chime in at VFHS and keep it to like a sentence or two less than 3 lines.
I'm like 100% out of fictional stuff now, it's great; I really haven't watched enough of Short Circuit, Inspector Gadget, or Knightrider recently to make fun of those. Everything else is already a featured article, or else I'd try adding that Dave Chappelle is a time traveler from a Utopian future free of racism, where the N word is just a friendly way for people of all colors and creeds to say hello to one another; but that unfortunately he erased this timeline from existence with his show. Irritable of contents (talk) 23:42, May 24, 2016 (UTC)
It's not clear what should happen to post scriptum when it makes the transition into English; I write PS. Our style guidance has not gotten down to that level of detail. However, to paraphrase Freud, sometimes a mistake is just a mistake. An increasing number of FAs is a risk, likewise an exponentially increasing number of websites that do not require Wikicoding. Nevertheless, the number of available page names here is still infinity. Spıke Radiomicrophone23:48 24-May-16

edit God-Fearing Republicans

So what exactly was wrong with the God Fearing Republican additions?....You right about the ranting on Criticisms of Video Games. My estimate was maybe half of God Fearing Republicans was going to be reverted but not all; admittedly it is pretty listy but so is Worst 100 Ways To Kill Sarah Connor. In general how long should lists that aren't The Worst 100 Lists of All Time be max? The mushroom cult part was kind of non sequitur as well.

Other than Sarah Palin and Florida, it seems like none of my edits to political topics have been acceptable. I figured there was at least a decent sentence or two in there at least, like say the Centurions servant bit which is rather blindingly hypocritical. I mean they are basically defined by being honor bound and ignorant like Klingons. What's up doc, normally you have detailed explanations as to how I messed up? Irritable of contents (talk) 22:00, May 26, 2016 (UTC)

[Crossed messages] With apologies, I reverted you here. The whole article is ranty, but your edit is largely advocacy. People don't come to Uncyclopedia to read jaunty explanations of what hypocrites Republicans are, whether we agree or not, nor to be repeatedly sent to Wikipedia by piped links to get the evidence needed to understand your edit or the Easter Eggs hidden therein. Spıke Radiomicrophone22:01 26-May-16
In the future I'll avoid mentioning anything specific Jesus did other than be born from a his virgin mom, walk on water, turn water into wine, know 12 guys including Jeduas, (not 13, or 70 or 72), get baptized by some other guy, know some ho named Mary Magdeline, get betrayed by Judas, than die.
For Judaism the notable ones are just Adam, Noah, Abraham, Moses, Solomon and David; than there's the garden of Eden and the Ark of the Covenant, a boat, a tower and temple; the other stuff is too obscure to mention because they don't have cartoon cameos.
As for Muhammad the only thing that's common knowledge is that you can't show depict him, that's basically all western pop culture has actually said about him.
Buddhism is about some guy who meditates, and has statues.
Hinduism is about multi armed blue people and an elephant headed guy, unlike the other religions (minus Mary) some of the important magical people are girls like Kali; she is only known from a single Hollywood appearance, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.
Than there's basically just Thor and Loki (only because of The Avengers), than Hercules and Zeus for all of the other religions. Zeus is also what most people imagine God looks like because of the lightning clouds.
I suppose dissing is a form of advocacy, but in that case there's a lot of other things I've advocated with Easter eggs as well.
I suppose dissing is a form of advocacy, but in that case there's a lot of other things I've advocated as well. Irritable of contents (talk) 23:21, May 26, 2016 (UTC)
I don't care what you advocate. This particular edit was simply more cryptic and ranty than funny at all. Moreover, it seems that when you get started writing manifestoes, the grammar gets worse. You could perhaps restore some of your edit but please be funny. Spıke Radiomicrophone23:50 26-May-16
The parts on Tubal Cain and alien/demon rape were a bit too ranty. It's really hard to make the abortion debate funny, Cartoon Network and Comedy Central never touch it, unlike rape which is a gold mine of laughs. I mean Doug Stanhope can do it, but he's not on network TV every week: I can't recall any female stand up comics who mention it. Irritable of contents (talk) 00:06, May 27, 2016 (UTC)
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