User talk:GUncyclopedian

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edit Welcome

BB Putin

Very nice jobe with joining Uncyclopedia. We will now take care of you.

Hello, GUncyclopedian, and welcome to Uncyclopedia. This is a wiki (a collection of pages anyone can edit). Words in blue are "links" and can be clicked to take you to another page. This wiki is for comedy. It pretends it's Wikipedia, but we make people laugh, not bore them. If you aren't interested in a fake encyclopedia but in fake news stories, we have UnNews, and there are other projects for scripts, lyrics, how-to guides, books, etc.

What you can do

You can create your own article. It is better to do it under your own name, if, for example, you are not sure whether you will finish it; for example, User:GUncyclopedian/An article. (The red instead of blue is a link to a page that doesn't yet exist.) If you don't have any ideas, we have a list of articles that need to be created.

If you've written an article, we have a Proofreading service where someone will correct your mistakes, and a review process where another Uncyclopedian will read your article and suggest improvements.

You can help without writing articles; just read articles and, if you see an improvement in writing or in comedy, jump in and edit it. In fact, you can help without writing at all, such as organizing, watching for vandals, or even greeting other new users.

What you need

To write articles, you need a sense of humor and an ability to write good English. We all have strengths and weaknesses and you can get help in any area. But everyone needs an ability to work with other people. Be polite, positive, and helpful toward others, and assume others are doing the same toward you.

What to read
For personal help
  • Active administrators of Uncyclopedia are able to help you. In addition to that they are paid twice as much as we are, however, they still cannot afford a cup of coffee;
  • Several experienced Uncyclopedians have indicated their willingness to adopt new users;
  • Finally, you can ask questions on your (here) or on my talk page. And I will be willing to help you!
How to post to talk pages

Please follow these general rules:

  • Add comments at the end of a talk page so people notice your addition.
  • Start your paragraphs with one or more ":" characters to indent them and set them off from other people's posts.
  • At the end, type ~~~~ (four tildes), which gets replaced by your signature (you can set it up using Preferences) and the date and time of your post.
  • Don't delete anyone's messages. In case of any controversy, we depend on an accurate record of what was written. You may disavow your remarks by striking them through like this.

I hope you enjoy it here!

Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:10, September 28, 2013 (UTC)

I already know this stuff from god's userpage. --GUncyclopedian (talk) 19:13, September 28, 2013 (UTC)

You did not know, you only thought you did. Beware of thoughts, they are dangerous. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:43, September 28, 2013 (UTC)

edit New York (fictional city)

Hello and welcome! Did you create that before you registered? We do allow multiple, inconsistent articles on the same subject, and picking this title is a way to get some space separate from our existing article on New York. However, it is unlikely that anyone will ever look up "New York (fictional city)" in our or any other encyclopedia.

A related problem is that the article's use of vagueness is a joke that's overused here. ("It is unclear...It is commonly described...Most critics agree...") I often tell writers to ditch the phrases (encyclopedia clichés) that try to sound encyclopedic and just state facts authoritatively. For a better sense of stuff that may seem funny but we've all seen it a thousand times, see our How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid.

An article on New York ought to use American spelling (not "realisations").

A final thing: Ending with a list is going to encourage Anon, you used to be one, to add more disjointed items. Forever, until the page gets really crufty. It's better to focus on the funny thing you were trying to say and write it up as a real paragraph. Happy editing! Spıke ¬ 19:20 28-Sep-13

No, I didn't make that page.--GUncyclopedian (talk) 19:30, September 28, 2013 (UTC)

edit User:GUncyclopedian/Monsanto

I am putting this at the address shown above so you can take as long as you want. One sentence is not yet enough for mainspace. Cheers! Spıke ¬ 19:24 28-Sep-13

You will see stuff like this a lot. --GUncyclopedian (talk) 19:30, September 28, 2013 (UTC)

We have seen stuff like this a lot. Please, put in your userspace before it is finished. It is boring to look at one-sentence articles. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:43, September 28, 2013 (UTC)

It wil be finished later. The Monsanto page is unfinished.--GUncyclopedian (talk) 20:24, September 28, 2013 (UTC)

We all agree it is unfinished. That is why Anton is telling you it does not yet belong in mainspace. That we "will see stuff like this a lot" despite the friendly advice that it is not proper, is provocative. If it were true that you "already know this stuff," you would indent your posts to set them off from other people's posts, as it says in the above welcome message. Spıke ¬ 20:34 28-Sep-13

edit Quality > Quantity

Please take some time to slow down and consider the context and strategy of the humor that you insert into articles. By context, I mean that what you put in should fit with the material around it, as well as be funny. Consider the point of view that the article is written from, generally an encyclopedic third person point of view, though you will sometimes find articles written in the first or second person. Ask yourself honestly if your addition is really necessary and improves the article. Also consider the strategy used in the article, which jokes set the theme for the article, what background information sets the tone for the reader? Please read HTBFANJS for more tips on comedy writing. I still look at it from time to time and I have been here 5 years. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 21:34, September 28, 2013 (UTC)

I am curious. Is this Gouncyclopedia! returned from the wiki dead? --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 21:46, September 29, 2013 (UTC)

edit I am back.

Some stuff have changed. The main thing is that I now prefer quality over quantity. --GUncyclopedian (talk) 22:59, January 31, 2014 (UTC)

I am enthused at this! But wait — we had not even blocked you! Spıke ¬ 23:05 31-Jan-14
The Return of Gouncy Guncy??--LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 23:06, January 31, 2014 (UTC)
To start off on a really good foot, sign your nomination at VFD. Romartus, this is a tough one: It is seriously unfunny, but Frosty (sporadic Admin) and Kip (departed) both regard it as a website meme. Spıke ¬ 23:11 31-Jan-14

I fixed that. --GUncyclopedian (talk) 23:16, January 31, 2014 (UTC)

So let me get picky: In the future, (1) start your vote with # so it is part of a numbered list; (2) no Enter (hard return) before your sig because that sets the next guy's vote back to 1; (3) if voting on an existing ballot, don't forget to increase the vote count (automatic in the case of a new ballot). Spıke ¬ 23:19 31-Jan-14
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