User talk:Funnybony

Om Gam Ganapataye Namah!!!

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December 24

I see you on-site again. Merry Christmas and all the other merry holidays to you and yours. May the light of Rama and that monkey shine on you throughout the week. And after too, like all of next year. And more than that. Al 21:39 24decemb12

Cheers, mate! Happy Holidays! I'll be calling...Y/bro--Funnybony  21:58, Dec 24

Hey, Sog came back. It's a Festivus miracle! Al, 23:36 later that day

REALLY!!! A Christmas miracle. Great!!!--Funnybony  08:27, Dec 25

I've decided

That we are going to colaborate on a New Years Eve themed news piece. So...what are we going to do? --ShabiDOO 14:58, December 29, 2012 (UTC)

Don't know, mate! I just checked the headlines and nothing is particularly catchy. Any ideas? How about New Year's Eve atomic fireworks display levels Iran?--Funnybony  18:14, Dec 29

Iranians celebrate new years with neuclear fire works display over Tehran (of even better, Tel-Aviv ??? --ShabiDOO 19:03, December 29, 2012 (UTC)

Mate, I can't think of anything off hand. And lots of personal stuff to do. If you can make a draft I'll go over it. Cheers!--Funnybony  08:03, Dec 30

Not a problem, I colabed with another user. here. Thanks a million for the idea. Have a happy new year! --ShabiDOO 18:45, December 31, 2012 (UTC)

Much Thanks!

Murder Frog has awarded you a pair of scissors! Now go run around with them.

You gave my rewrite Jim Morrison a For. on VFH, and for that I am tickled pink. Here you go; have your very own scissors. --Murder Frog ✄ Dull interest wanes. 00:25, December 30, 2012 (UTC)

Sappy New Year

Thanks for the Sappy New Year. Check out near the bottom of this, I'd like your opinion on a howto, bottom of the page. HowTo:Don't take any wooden nickels. Al timeless

Funny one. I can't think of anything. Wait! Huh? Oh, a pin just dropped!--Funnybony  13:47, Dec 31

Uhhhhhhhh (silent scream). The bottom of the page, go all the way down. That's what she said. Al later

Mutaween

I minced words in your Intro, but problems remain. The last sentence of the first paragraph cues the reader to laugh (essentially, "these are funny guys") before providing the laughter-inducing raw material; and the third paragraph is way too factual. It reads as though awareness-raising is competing with humor. Spıke ¬ 13:27 31-Dec-12

Hey! Cool! I just did a bit more on your advice. It's a collab now so fix whatever you like. Always appreciated.--Funnybony  13:44, Dec 31

My problems with it still remain, and I don't wish to wrestle the article into a completely different direction. The only addition that leaps to mind, under Other meanings, would be a British chapter involved with the well-documented effort to put Sharia into official use in the UK. "This chapter of the Mutaween is known as the Weetabix." Spıke ¬ 14:55 31-Dec-12

Yeah, lets don't change the direction. But please add the part you're referring to. Most welcome.--Funnybony  15:33, Dec 31

Congrats

You've won. You're our 1,000,000th visitor and won a visit to the Ghetto Disneyland........................ just kidding. But Congratulations on being nominated for Writer of the Year. You've earned it!--Sir Peasewhizz de New York (Chat) (Stalk?) 03:46, January 1, 2013 (UTC)

Much appreciated, Mate!!! You're really trying hard - and are bound for greatness! Cheers!--Funnybony  07:26, Jan 1

Drop your pants and grab the eggnog! It's the UnSignpost.

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

The Newspaper the Whole Family Must Enjoy!

January 2nd, 2013 • Issue 180 • We always do it Manually!

Vote! Or else! By Chief This image has not been altered in any way Is it that time of year again? It's the time when everyone celebrates the people who are the most remarkable amongst us at everything except what matters. It's time for Writer of the Year, Uncyclopedian of the Year and Useless Gobshite of the Year. These compliment our small selection of awards: WotM, UotM, PotM, NotM, AotM, RotM, EGA, FP, PWotM, ANOTM, Top 10 o' the month, UGotM, VFH, VFD, VFS and VFP. Not forgetting of course to all the userspace awards. Writer of the Year got off to a splendid start when Aleister in Chains nominated Funnybony and SPIKE for the award by writing brief but poignant marriage proposals to both of them. Thank goodness for Aleister, if not for him the wider world might have assumed we weren't all massive girls. Since then Thekillerfroggy nominated Xamralco, who was not able to express his appreciation due to a serious case of not editing the wiki any longer. As always what should be a rigorous heterosexual competition involving manly pursuits like backstabbing, lies, blackmail and threats is being irretrievably compromised by people like Aleister and Shabidoo; people whose sole purpose on the awards pages is to make everybody else feel bad about not noticing other people. Uncyclopedian of the Year is being lead by Romartus, Uncyclopedia's voting-in-chief. Shockingly, he was also nominated by Aleister who, as it turns out, is gayer than Christmas, apparently Romartus makes him "Proud to be an uncyclopedian", he makes "Legendary votes on VFH" and gives "Legendary hand relief". Potatochopper of the Year is a more subdued and manly affair, where absolutely nobody has been nominated at all... it's like reviewer of the month were moved to a different page name. Hopefully Aleister or Shabidoo will nominate someone soon, we here at the UnSignpost have gone to the trouble of writing the nomination for them: "<insert name here> has made many fantastic images, at least two of which I have made love to on at least nineteen occasions. My genitals ache for them every single evening and someday they will make my dreams come true and love me! Also Olipro sucks balls." Olipro was the only nominee for Useless Gobshite of the Year (insert your own joke here), but Zombiebaron quickly joined him in ignominy. Please go vote for both of them so they may end up tied, and share the prize (a year's supply of toilet paper) on their revolving bed built entirely from used condoms and KY bottles. From the desk of the Cabal: 2013 is the year of subservience By Nobody Once again you all stand before us, another year of failure behind you and another year of subjugation ahead of you. The non-existent Cabal would like to wish you all a happy New Year. All workers users are reminded that failure to celebrate the new year with adequate happiness and joy is punishable by enforced time labouring in the non-existent Lime Quarries followed by the immediate cessation of chocolate rations for the remainder of this work quarter. Once again you have failed us, utterly and completely. Last year we advised you all that resistance was utterly unnecessary and, if anything, we have had to tolerate 0.22% more resistance, we have heard you discuss and then decide to leave our kind benefactors, whilst promoting several of your own number to within the cabal in an effort to encourage dissent and democracy within our ranks. We saw you continue to tinker with that which does not concern you whilst simultaneously complaining when people are warned about the indecent images you propagate amongst your number. It seems prudent to remind you that if we delete every single template, every single image and every single forum your freedom will only increase. It is not what some of you have foolishly referred to as "overly deletionist", it is streamlining and it is good for all of you. It is with vague optimism that we note that you continue to strive at a barely satisfactory level, you have certainly earned a small fraction of the baubles and trinkets that have been handed out over the past year. It has not escaped our notice that the Worst 100 Reflections on 2012 only closed on time this year due to Thekillerfroggy skipping sixty of the reflections, we are gratified to note that Roman Dog Bird had practically no input on the list and very few of them regard uncontrolled outbreaks of creativity and morale, such dangerous forces must be carefully rationed and controlled. Cutting of corners and a blatant disregard for regulations do not amuse the Cabal. Now we must inexorably turn our attentions to 2013 and the promise it brings. All users should note that due to several security compromises over the last few months movement throughout the Uncyclopedia complex has been restricted during the hours of darkness. Where major editing is to take place you must ensure that you have faxed the appropriate forms to your divisional liaison officer prior to commencing work, failure to do so will result in an unacceptable breakdown in bureaucracy. Uncyclopedia must prevail, editors must remember that without patient mind numbing work and servitude we can never accomplish our ultimate goal of... well, that need not concern you. That is all citizens, you may now return to your allocated taskings.

Check out these pages! BURN THE WIKI BURN IT TO THE GROUND A long, long, very long forum where nothing was accomplished and everybody eventually just started typing random bullshit. A bad, bad, very bad idea, which the UnSignpost endorses with full vigor. An even worse idea. A page where Kip the Dip takes credit for something bad, very bad. A discussion far more important than any of the preceding links. Screw You Guys, I'm Going Home: 03:48, May 2, 2012 MrN9000 (Talk | contribs) blocked Bizzeebeever (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 20 minutes ‎ (Hahaha you're not an admin so I can do this and get away with it! Hahaha! (hahahhaha)) 22:44, May 18, 2012 RAHB (Talk | contribs) blocked Bizzeebeever (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 hour ‎ (Not cool to use other people's sigs man......*shity eyes*.....) 23:07, July 17, 2012 Thekillerfroggy (Talk | contribs) blocked Bizzeebeever (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 2 hours ‎ (Snoopin' around in areas he shouldn't be concerned with) 19:32, October 4, 2012 Frosty (Talk | contribs) blocked Bizzeebeever (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 44 seconds ‎ (I must block you at least once in order to be more awesome than you.) 03:31, November 17, 2012 Frosty (Talk | contribs) blocked Bizzeebeever (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of infinite ‎ (Shame on you for hating on Australian films! [DO NOT UNBAN]) 02:11, December 13, 2012 Frosty (Talk | contribs) blocked Bizzeebeever (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 4 minutes ‎ (User request) 16:11, December 19, 2012 RAHB (Talk | contribs) blocked Bizzeebeever (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 10 minutes ‎ (Necessary research into the reasons for no funny bans having happened last week. Do not be alarmed, we are trained professionals, and also very aroused.) 01:29, December 26, 2012 Frosty (Talk | contribs) blocked Bizzeebeever (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 33 seconds ‎ (Telling me how to be an administrator) Biopic of the Week When we carried our knuckle-dusters and brick-filled socks to the talk page of new user Equilateralperil this past week to interview him, we were amused and perplexed to see him employ the classic defensive stance of a painfully shy, abused opossum. Rolling into the fetal position on the ground with his buttocks in the air, he began to reveal embarrassing personal details in a shrill voice, shouting "Have a field day, you scamps! Yes, mock me harder!", apparently hoping that we would walk away in disgust. However, to assume that reverse psychology would work on Uncyclopedians is to give them credit for having something that they don't, namely, a psychology. Some of the details which he will now regret ever having shared: Equilateral (that's what we call him for short, when we don't call him Bitch) is a 17-year-old schoolboy living in Victoria in Australia, is at the "top of his class" in multiple subjects, and is on his school's debate team. As he is on his school's rock band, jazz band, and "show" band, we are forced to assume that his school, like the one from Glee, is filled to the brim with people wearing matching plaid shirts, bow ties, white vests, and straw skimmers, who are all horrifyingly perky and prone to breaking into song (or dance) for no apparent reason—especially when the occasion does not require it. He claims to have had one girlfriend, who was Japanese and broke his heart. He refused to supply nude pictures of her, so we are forced to conclude that she is imaginary. For Christmas, he claims he received a "charcoal Italian moleskin jacket", which he is apparently wearing at this moment, over his Casper-the-Ghost™ footie pajamas. So there you have it! From our experience, Equilateralperil is most likely his school's Designated Punching Nerd, and spends most of his spare time pulling his poodle-haired head from toilets, when he isn't writing excellent articles for Uncyclopedia. While he's on holiday in Perth or Canberra or someplace, do give them a read. Newsroom UnTune of the Week The Uncyclopedian's Song This space left intentionally penis.

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

 ~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) ~ Wed, Jan 2 '13 13:14 (UTC)

Unerectable, ah, Untouchable

There is a little bit about untouchables in Mohandas Gandhi. And maybe you should read this new forum, it seems the sites are splitting tomorrow, and this site will be overrun by IP's and vandals (likely some vandals from the group leaving, if I understand human nature right). Chief Justice and others may stay here, we'll see. "Al" 12:09 3-1-'13

Tomorrow? No... Saturday. Cat the Colourful (Feed me!) Zzz 12:13, 3 January, 2013 (UTC)

Where do you live? In some of the world this is already well into Friday. Some of us are going to evening prayers in a few minutes, over to the mosque. Jeez, you infidels. Aleister 12:15 3-1-13

Whoops, I forgot the timezone. Damn, you people get the new Uncyclopedia faster! Grhh... Cat the Colourful (Feed me!) Zzz 12:18, 3 January, 2013 (UTC)

I just touched an untouchable. It was kind of gross, but I did it. So am I now an untouchable because I touched one? I await your response with trepidation. Al 23:17 Uncy's 8th Birthday

You're ignoring me! I must be an untouchable. I knew it, damn, I knew it the whole time. Touch one of them and it rubs off on you like silly putty. (p.s. Check out recent changes, it's lonely but interesting here now. I like the new site too, it actually has good energy. I'll live between both of them, like a tibetian word I heard once for a ghost who lives in both worlds. Al 16:23 6-1-'13 three magi day

Hiya Al, you, untouchable? Well, I guess via computer its kinda like that. Nah! You're touchable - at least by phone. So the real good article would be, "Unreachable" = haha!!! Congrats on reaching 66 (you devil, you!), now there are two heavy weight champs here. Cheers, mate!--Funnybony  17:42, Jan 6

Yeah, on the first day of the new uncy Sog and I tie at 6666. Hee hee. I was going to ask you about that, can you make a "former heavyweight champ" belt? If Sog comes back I won't have it for long, do we get to keep the belt or does it move on with each change? I forget how they do it in boxing - Jack Dempsey, what a great page. I did some edits on the lede last week, please take a look, it wasn't flowing easily enough, like the rest of the page. The UnReachable caste, those who cannot be phoned, twittered to, or talked to on the internet. Has great possibilities! Shall we, that's a good place for it to evolve to. You have the genius gene. Oh, on the Bing search engine a couple of hours ago the Be've'l page here came first, and his wikipedia page came second. That was a proud moment. Thanks for the nice message. Al 20:17 6-1-'13

UnEvent

You make me sad with your new page. It's been a long time since I've had some exceptionally potent hashish. They are some lucky non-event arabs, that's for sure. al-leister

Pfffff! Hey, bro, if you want good stuff you'll have to join Seal Team 6. Cheers!--Funnybony  21:47, Jan 8

I've been a member of Seal Team 6 for years, and nobody has offered me any. Even after the bin Laden thing, when we all were posing for pics standing on his corpse and some of us stood up those little tourist-trap statues of the towers on his forehead and shot them off with practice rounds, nothing. Al

Politics of Singapore

Hello! We have a new user who is turning his attention to the above page with a single-minded focus on portraying it as Nazi Germany. Romartus and I have reverted many of his edits to date; but the article might benefit from a look from you and perhaps the addition of clever renditions of actual current events. Spıke ¬ 12:03 10-Jan-13

Yo, okay, I checked it out. What this guy doesn't get is that Singapore is more Dystopian than Commie. It's a mega expensive, culturally dry, BIG BROTHER police state, with death penalty for everything. I had a branch shop there from 1991-1997 which meant I had to go to the godforsaken place often, and I hated it. In fact, local people were trying to get me to take banned news and give to the media outside. But I always refused - because its not my battle. Let this guy kick their arse - if he lives there it'll mean his arse. BTW: Have you EVER been ANYWHERE? Cheers!--Funnybony  12:40, Jan 10

EVER? My foreign travels are reflected in our articles on Peru, Hong Kong, and the new version of Mexico; and the article on Chihuahua, Mexico includes some of the first digital photos I ever took. And I might head out again if the US demilitarizes the airports and ends the crackdown on the law-abiding. Spıke ¬ 15:06 10-Jan-13

Hey, COOL! I thought you were stuck in the boonies in NH, or nowheresville. Glad to know you get around. Once you pass through the ice cave to Shangrila then you'll find yourself in Thailand - especially if you like smiley people and nice weather and etc etc etc. Come on over. Cheers!--Funnybony  15:15, Jan 10

Sir! my signature provincialism does not come with the province, but was a result of years of studious work. But that was a nice invitation, and worth a side trip if I should be anywhere on that continent. Spıke ¬ 16:35 10-Jan-13

PS--This morning, Anon claims that Thailand is in similar disrepair, something you are uniquely situated to remedy. Spıke ¬ 14:17 13-Jan-13

Mate, I won't touch the Thailand article. It is something I am uniquely un-situated to remedy. Cheers!--Funnybony  16:10, Jan 13

Forum:Funnybony has 40 features!! Woo hoo!!

Come by n' Party!!! Aleister 20:53 15-1-'13

We need a party for you at the other site too

Thanks for the belt. Does the person get to keep it, or does it move around? I don't know if ex-fighters get to keep the belt. As I've often said, it's all so confusing. Thanks again! Al 20:50 28-1-'13

Championship belts, like diamonds, are forever. Yeah, Bro!!!--Funnybony  06:34, Jan 29

There seems to be a party going on...

...on some other site, for someone who just got his 40th feature there. Woo woo! Aleister 1:22 31-1-'13

And there should be a party going on....

You won Writer of the Year!!!!! Congratulations, and this is well deserved. Nice. Aleister 00:03 1-2-'13