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edit Beaconhills College
I like your article. For an article about a college, it's surprisingly good. You should main-space it, in my opinion.
- I can understand Spike and Romartus' criticism, but I wonder if they noticed the Inception theme of your article. And that list of sports is ridiculously long--that's the point. I get that, and I dig it. :) Don't worry; it's got promise. Keep at it.
- Definitely ready for mainspace. Expertly written and VFD-proof. Please make a more decisive start toward comedy in the Intro, though, and delete all of Section 2, according to the venerable Uncyclopedia maxim, "You might get us to care about your school, but nobody anywhere cares about your residence hall." Providing such details always suggests that the desire to inform is interfering with the desire to amuse (or that the target audience is in a half-mile radius). 12:18 30-Dec-12
I'll take a look now. --Equilateralperil 12:21, December 30, 2012 (UTC)
- Unrelated advice: When discussing a draft in userspace, it's best to provide a link to it. Seeing my name in the discussion, I wanted to look at it for myself, and had to sift through your Contributions to find it, as its current name does not contain the word Beaconhills (and the Search function is useless). Cheers. 12:51 30-Dec-12
I've made a few changes. Are the opening two sentences appropriate? They identify the author as a student. I could put a new part of the intro in their place if they aren't. --Equilateralperil 14:12, December 30, 2012 (UTC)
- It gets to the point faster; I minced more words to nudge it in the same direction. 14:28 30-Dec-12
I guess I may as well put it up now. --Equilateralperil 15:24, December 30, 2012 (UTC)
- "Instil," huh? Next you're going to tell me it's summer....
- My Random House and New Oxford agree.
- Oh, they also agree that this is one damned good article.
- "Instil," huh? Next you're going to tell me it's summer....
- With all due respect to your Random House, it (pictured) damned well isn't summer. 17:55 30-Dec-12
So... I guess you left?
No, I haven't! Don't worry. I've had exams the last few weeks and I've been a bit slack with this in favour of studying. Also, I've been a bit slack with this in favour of nothing (when exams finished and I no longer needed to study). I'm going to try and make something soon. --Equilateralperil (talk) 04:10, December 1, 2012 (UTC)
Cool! Don't disappoint us, or we'll have your skin. >:D
Hah! Very nice.
Indeed it did, and it is better than what was there. Which was nothing. Still, there's something to be said for that! Many of my articles are not better than nothing, but I mailed personal threats to all the admins here, so no one touches them. :D
My favorite line: "A recurring theme is crocodiles, or “crocs” (as distinct from the footwear, which is ever so slightly safer to insert your feet into)."
edit Ban Patrol
Thanks for defending Grand Rapids, Michigan and a couple others on my watchlist from the Arabic vandal, and for evidently working the graveyard shift at RecentChanges. While I endorse Frosty as an admin to ask to ban this guy, the usual way of getting an admin's attention is to list the little bugger (the vandal, not the admin) on Ban Patrol. This has the advantage of getting the attention of whatever admin is on duty (if he's paying attention). 13:21 22-Dec-12
Ah, I see. I know what to do next time. Thanks. --Equilateralperil 03:35, December 23, 2012 (UTC)
edit Greetings person!
As current editor of the UnSignpost, it is my duty to come up with materials for the UnSignpost Biopic, a weekly feature that profiles Uncyclopedia's members. If you could be so good as to supply some personal information on yourself, I'll see to it that we insult you no more than fifteen times, and call into question your morals and ethics, as well as the pedigree of your mother, no more than five of those times. It's an offer you can't refuse!
Right. I'll play it straight and leave the mockery to you guys. I'm an Australian boy, aged 17. I live about an hour from Melbourne. This year, I achieved the third-best academic results in Year 11 in my school, and I was top of the class in Maths Methods and Japanese. I play keyboards, bass guitar and drums, and I write songs occasionally. I play in my school's rock band, show band and jazz band. I have written a few articles for Uncyclopedia, which I think you should have a look at. You know, if you want to. It's okay if you don't. My best friend looks like Louis Theroux, and this was the inspiration behind writing that article. My favourite webcomic is Homestuck, so I rewrote that page. I wear my Seiko dive watch every waking hour, and my Theroux-esque friend does the same with his, which I recommended for him. I read the Herald Sun sometimes. Or do the puzzles, rather. For Christmas, I got a charcoal Italian moleskin jacket and a box of Cadbury Favourites. In the box of Favourites, there was a relatively high number of Cherry Ripes, which I found somewhat irritating. I suffer from compulsive autoscriblia, and an example of this can be seen on the top right of that page. I have had one girlfriend. I met her on an exchange trip to Japan. She attended the other campus of my school, so we hadn't met before. She left me.
There you go. Have a field day, you scamps. --Equilateralperil 04:38, December 28, 2012 (UTC)
- 0.o ...this all sounds suspiciously like true stuff...!
Oh. They were just two presents, but you guys can go and waste mocking space on my supposed receiving of few.
As this may have robbed you of some mocking material, I'd like to also state that I won best speaker in the debating final at my school. The other side lost (to the chagrin of much of the student body) because they approached the debate like performers, not debaters. I'm currently wearing pyjamas with ghosts on them. --Equilateralperil 22:02, December 28, 2012 (UTC)
I noticed you did a little editing to Jim Morrison and fixed a few typos and such. Thanks for the help! Also, thanks for voting for it on VFH. --Murder Frog ✄ Dull interest wanes. 04:38, December 29, 2012 (UTC)
Don't mention it. You know, "The End" came up on shuffle in my music about half an hour ago! --Equilateralperil 04:54, December 29, 2012 (UTC)
Oh, and is your username a (somewhat subverted) Doors reference? --Equilateralperil 05:06, December 29, 2012 (UTC)
- Haha, I hadn't even thought about that until now! "Peace Frog", Murder Frog... it was probably my subconscious kicking in when I typed in my username. Great song, just like "The End", and every other song by The Doors. But interesting point; maybe it'll help me start to understand how my mind works. --Murder Frog ✄ Dull interest wanes. 05:55, December 29, 2012 (UTC)
edit Thanks again!
|Murder Frog has awarded you a pair of scissors!|
Now go run around with them.
I thank you a second time for helping tidy up Jim Morrison, and for voting for him on VFH. This time you get a pair of nice, polished scissors. --Murder Frog ✄ Dull interest wanes. 01:43, December 30, 2012 (UTC)
Cool. Thanks for your vote on NotM. --Equilateralperil 04:16, December 30, 2012 (UTC)
edit Claudette Colvin will now sit-in on your page
Thank you very much for your vote, but even more for correcting my stupid spelling and syntax errors on the page. You made it flow much better. I did put the larger quote back, it seemed better with the quote more set-off like that. I'm glad you liked the article, and glad you didn't leave me hanging looking as stupid as Rosa Parks (hahahahahheeheeheeheeheeheehahahahuh?) Aleister 2:33 30decemb12
- p.s. Ah, and you improved and fixed my mistakes on "HowTo:Beet off", once again catching me with my pants down. Thank you!!!! (if you vote on it in the affirmative I will send you a very hot beet, freshly used. Thanks again!)
That's okay. Thank you for voting for me on NotM.
With regards to your edits to Claudette Colvin, it's all fine, except for "...a young local minister Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr."
You could write "...young local minister Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.", "...a young local minister, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.," or "...a young local minister (Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.)" instead.
As you changed it from the first option, I have decided to offer you these choices instead of changing it myself, because you may have thought my change was incorrect. --Equilateralperil 04:33, December 30, 2012 (UTC)
- Thanks, please change things like that, I'll go put a comma in. I just did an edit sweep of the page and reworked some of the words, and I think I added "young" and tried to make the fact clear that King's objections to teenagers in the movement would be changed in 1963, when James Bevel used children in Birmingham and King tried to stop him at one point. Had to get the fact in there someplace that Rose Parks did eventually sit-down (couldn't just leave her hanging), and that took some workaround. You are a very good editor and writer, and it's good to meet you this way while working a page. I do hope Colvin makes feature, for her sake. She's getting more publicity now, and this would add a little more to that even if we are a satirical site (I never bought into that Content-free label somebody put on us). I wonder why Rosa Parks didn't honor Colvin more. I best go fight the good fight. Aleister 12:08 30Decemb12
Traffic is "snarled" (into a jam), not "snared" (as in trapped). Other than that, good catches!12:09 30-Dec-12
Oh, sorry. I haven't heard the word used in that context before, so I thought it was meant to be "snared".
I like the article, by the way.
In case anyone becomes curious about my imminent lack of activity, I'm going on a holiday to Canberra and Sydney, and I won't be back until the 12th. See you all then. --Equilateralperil 11:51, January 1, 2013 (UTC)
- You have my sympathy. Sir CPT Dr PuppyOnTheRadio GUN UmP WotM NotM FP VFP VFH CM POTM UGM 11:49 03 Jan
edit YOU ARE WINNER
Noob of the Moment December 2012 22:44, January 1, 2013 (UTC)
Fantastic article! The fact that I was an representative of Fairfax media until very recently has not influenced my feelings on this in any way, shape, or form. (Although Andrew Bolt seriously needs an article in his own right.)
What part of Melbourne are you from? If your biopic is correct, I'm twice your age, and then a few more years, but also from Melbourne. Feel free to give shit to Frosty - he's from rural NSW somewhere. It's almost as bad as being from Sydney. Sir CPT Dr PuppyOnTheRadio GUN UmP WotM NotM FP VFP VFH CM POTM UGM 11:47 03 Jan
edit Hi there, you awesome person you!
You should come on IRC sometime and let us have a look at you. We've resolved that we need to make our newer members feel like part of the family, and that won't be possible until you come into our deep dark Internet cave and let us devour you whol.... um, get to know you! Yes, that's what I meant to say.
Avoiding VFS for the moment, I am glad to see someone is working an article! It's one of those cartoon strips you always see but I haven't got a clue what it is really about. Thanks for bringing the idea here! --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 16:45, January 22, 2013 (UTC)
Anon's new section, Internal politics of the mathematics department. is unfortunately, internal to his mathematics department and fails UN:CM. So I agree with you in reverting him, but if he persists, would you please Undo with such a Change Summary, as his contribution is good English and might be amusing to those exactly in the know. 03:59 22-Feb-13
- I was sitting right next to that classmate on both occasions. A thorough change summary was given verbally. --Equilateralperil 13:45, February 22, 2013 (UTC)
That should suffice. (When I yell at my screen, no one hears it.) Cheers.13:56 22-Feb-13