User talk:Darwin of suburbia

Welcome!

Hello, Darwin of suburbia, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for nooblets:

• Beginner's Guide
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If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Dump, or add the following: {{help}} to this page along with a message and someone will come along and help you if they can. Again, welcome!  —– Sir Hv » | Talk | Contribs | KUN | UotM | RotM | VFH | Kidney | 10/04 09:50

did a pee review for you

on the pee review page (surprisingly!). Would be grateful if you could do one for UnNews:UK Prison Population Will Include Whole County by 2020. Fair enough if you don't have time/can't be arsed. Wanted someone with a UK perspective to do it. Would be grateful if you could be constuctive if you hate it. Thanks Step13 21:51, 19 August 2007 (UTC)

Just a thought

Those redirects you're making for Reservoir Dogs are made in a way that would make them hard to find by the everyday user. I hardly think that someone will look up "that nice guy eddie....". But then again, what do I know? :) ~ 08:43, 11 September 2007 (UTC)

I've deleted some of them. The redirect titles were unlinked anywhere else, and the chances of someone typing "Mr Jew, and Mr Brown" into the search box are, at best, remote. -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 08:51, 11 September 2007 (UTC)

Vote Nofu

Hello Comrade, it's me, Le Marquis de Nofu, here to ask you to check out my article Wire tapping. If you like it, vote for it here: VFH Wire tapping. Also, I have been bestowed with the honor of nomination for Noob of the Month. Check out my contributions and Home Page. If you like the work I've been doing around here in QVFD and PeeReview, for for me here.

Thanks much, --Major'GUN' Ggarfield, Le Marquis de Nofu .Complex! 16:59, 6 December 2007 (UTC)

This message paid for by the Friends of the Nofu Aristocracy Foundation.

Welcome to UnNews

You may have noticed I've deleted UnNews:Milestone for Private Eye: it's just wrong on so many levels.

• Firstly, DO NOT EVER REDATE YOUR ARTICLE!!! You made this turd on Feb 20, and that's where it belongs.
• Secondly, DO NOT REMOVE AN ICU TAG UNLESS YOU ARE AN ADMIN!!! FlyingFeling very nicely ICU'd this piece of shit, and unless it has been significantly improved, it does not deserve to be de-ICU'd.
• Thirdly, kindly read my welcoming drivel below to familiarize yourself with with formatting guidelines; perhaps learn to write an intelligible sentence while your at it.

Don't take this personally, I just felt like being a dick after reading your article. Cheers! Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 20:14, 29 February 2008 (UTC)

On your knees, worthy one! The Right Reverend Major Sir Zim_ulator blesses you. Your blessings are increasing exponentially. In the name of Sophia, the Church of Uncyclopedia and the Universal Church Triumphant of the Apathetic Agnostic, kneel and receive the melding of Zim's holy axe and your wetware. Now go write me a good UnNews article. Cheers! Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 03:48, March 15, 2010 (UTC)

Reverend Zim_ulator says: "There are coffee cup stains on this copy, damnit! Now that's good UnJournalism."

Welcome to UnNews, Darwin of suburbia, and thank you for contributing some crap, or otherwise attracting my attention. For a quick introduction about how you can write a decent or better UnNews article, please take a minute read our spiffy new Style Guide.

I am your humble servant (in your dreams), and if I may be of help to you, please leave me a note on my talk page.

Good things that can happen to you

You can win awards and prizes! You can become a better writer by subjecting your articles to the scrutiny of UnNews critique machine or UnCanninator shit article detection system. You can become a thorn in the side of Journalism as a whole. You can get promotions, ribbons, and free crockery! You can write stuff your mom would be ashamed to show her friends.

What happened to my article?

If you've submitted an article, and it's disappeared, I may have mercy-moved it to your user space. This means I've probably left a message on your talk page, likely in close proximity to this very message, explaining why.

Your article may have been tagged for ICU if it has significant problems meeting our criteria, or I may have deleted it because you did not register as a user.

Finally, maybe you just pissed me off. I mean, I know I'm a Roshi, and I'm supposed to be all "Zen" about everything, but I have bad days too, you know?

UnNews Audio

If you are interested in doing an UnNews audio, check this out.

UnNews UnFunnies

At present, I create UnCartoons for UnNews all by my onesies, for better or worse. Now, I will never claim that I am a good cartoonist. Fortunately, the internet provides us a way to do all sorts of things simply and easily. I found Stripgenerator.com, a great site to create cartoons with a minimum of talent.

This document is an ongoing effort by me to enhance the obfuscation coefficient of Uncyclopedia; productive changes, and criticism are welcome. Cheers! The Right and Left Reverend Major Sir Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 17:38, March 28, 2010 (UTC) Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 20:14, 29 February 2008 (UTC)