User talk:Cajek/Archive22

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edit Eh? Poopsmithy

So what's a chap like you doing hanging around the poopsmiths lounge??? Poopsmiths is for new users, and maybe when VFD is full... You know pants when you see it (I mean them) good sir! Grr... Take those undergarments (not trousers) and stick em where the sun don't shine! MrN  Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 00:49, Apr 3

I thought pooping was for EVERYONE?! But seriously, I was just going around randomly. How is THE a new user? You aren't, either! What do you suggest I do?   Le Cejak <Apr 03, 2008 [0:50]>
Hea, I'm only joshin yous me old mucka. No, I mean you should make the nominations yourself on VFD. What THE was doing on the page, I have no idea, but the experienced guys (like you) should really just nominate straight onto VFD. As poopsmith, it's my job to filter out the bad noms, but it's so unlikely that I'm going to disagree with you or any of the other experienced guys that it just makes more sense for people to make the noms themselves... Oh, while I'm here, I might as well whore this to you. I'm going to nominate this for VFH in a day or so, and thought it might be right up your street... ;-) MrN  Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 00:58, Apr 3
Honestly, I'm okay at seeing good articles, not bad ones. You're better at that VFD stuff, N. As for this: is it yours, cowritten with Optimuschris? What is the history of this page?   Le Cejak <Apr 03, 2008 [1:02]>
Ah, sorry, don't know how I did not spot this message! As per VFD... Well, I guess it's not a problem. If you want to post your pants in the lounge, tis not really a problem, it would just be a pain if all the experienced guys started to do it. As per HowTo:Become Stupid in 21 days nope, that's all Optimuschris. It's actually a page which was saved from VFD cos Chris wanted to re-write it. I have helped out a bit, but it's all his work really. Not bad for a first article eh? MrN  Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 16:34, Apr 7

edit Myeeeeiis?

On Pee Review I was just wondering how do you tell someone nicely their article is... well bad, particularly if their article is just a pile of other deleted articles and is currently on QVFD? --Sir DJ ~ Irreverent Icons-flag-au Noobaward Wotm Unbooks mousepad GUN 07:13, 3 April 2008 (UTC)

Oooh, yeah. Well, you have to be firm but specific. I see that your average on User:Cajek/Pee went down cuz of that. Well, first of all your humor score: why did it get a giggle out of you? What kind of stuff should they focus on in the future? Tell them about HTBFANJS, obviously, or you could do what I do and point them in the direction of this new thing I invented. If you don't think you can be nice on some level, try to show them that writing interesting stuff can be done. What do you think about that answer, DJ?   Le Cejak <Apr 03, 2008 [12:58]>
Sounds about right to me. Take a look at Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/tricycorn, where I came across a similar problem, and tried to give as much advice for improvement as possible. I hope I've given them something to think about without scaring them off, but who knows? As long as you're not nasty or scathing, that's the main thing, I think. --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | GUN | Natter | Uh oh | Pee 13:06, Apr 3
Thanks. I tried to help but after a look over the article it became clear that it really was just a pile of junk tacked together (as the writer even admitted. I will follow your lead UU. Did the review again (edit) <<< --Sir DJ ~ Irreverent Icons-flag-au Noobaward Wotm Unbooks mousepad GUN 03:41, 4 April 2008 (UTC)

edit HowTo:Win an Argument

A great review, much obliged Cajek! I've acted pretty quickly upon your suggestions, I wonder if you could take a look and see what you think now - whether the concept is clearer and the situation bit is clearer too. --Knucmo2 19:20, 3 April 2008 (UTC)

Now then, as I'm feeling inspired at the minute I took up one of your conceptual suggestions and wrote it into the argument article with an image to boot! --Knucmo2 20:57, 3 April 2008 (UTC)

edit I don't know if you ever got proper recognition for this

But if not, here it is.

Sir Cajek, in recognition of and with warm regards to your primary role in the rejuvenation of the Uncyclopedia Pee Review, the overhaul of the guidelines of the aforementioned, and for helping out users who were new to the new reviewing system, I hereby award you this:

Wear it with pride, or stuff it into an envelope and send it to Australia to give them avian flu; I care not. Have a nice day.

Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 20:02, 3 April 2008 (UTC)

To paraphrase the cranial clouting doctor somewhat: You got an award? Jealousy! (;-) Kudos). --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | GUN | Natter | Uh oh | Pee 21:11, Apr 3
Ha, awesome! Thank you guys! I'll, uh, put it somewhere prominent...! (I'm glad you guys like the reviewing system!)   Le Cejak <Apr 03, 2008 [21:22]>
/me smiles a crocodiles smile trying to pretend not to be jealous as hell.. GrrRrr. Seriously though. You deserve it. I would like to think the Pee Review guidelines where a combined effort between the two of us, but you were the one doing most of the actual chasing of people doing poor reviews, and your Pee Table (which UU kept alive for us) has defiantly had a very positive impact... /me grabs Cajek's spanky new cap and tosses it to UU so we can play piggy in the middle in an effort to not feel so jealous... MrN  Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 21:38, Apr 3
hey guys, that's mine! Is there some kind of award I can give you? Here, take my Writer of the Month award, I ain't using it.   Le Cejak <Apr 03, 2008 [21:40]>
You bastard!!! Also. You were a knight as soon as you won WotM. Dam kids! MrN  Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 21:41, Apr 3
N, you're UotM! That's something I don't even have! Quit being jealous! And toss me that cap while you're at it.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 21:42, 3 April 2008 (UTC)
/me hides Cajek's cap under under my own spanky new one and tries not to look guilty. I wasn't hinting for one, I wasn't...! And Mr N deserves an award for being a decent sort. But I already gave him one, and that's the highest token of my esteem, so I don't know what else to do. And actually, doesn't Boomer deserve a nod for, y'know, starting PEEING and stuff? Hell, pats on the back and awards all round! (Or we could all be quietly satisfied with a job well done...) As to writer of the month, I think that happens to people who, you know, write a lot of articles and stuff. We haven't a hope on current form! Also, FU multiple edit conflicts! ;-) --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | GUN | Natter | Uh oh | Pee 21:49, Apr 3
That's MrN to you Mr Ljlego sir. Also, apparently I'm WotM 1971 now??? I'm going to kill that dam Cajek! From what I can tell, feather in the cap is actually harder to win than UotM, though WotM/WotY has got to be the hardest... Oh, Cajek won that too? Bloody kids! I mean... JUST cos he writes loads of funny articles, and JUST cos he kinda well just a little bit completely and totally rejuvenated Pee Review, and JUST cos... Grumble, Grumble, Grumble. Oh, I don't want one of them stinking caps anyway! Honest. No. Not me. They are pants. So there. Hmm. /me grabs Cajek's and UU's caps, stuffs them down his trousers, rubs his groin before handing them back. MrN  Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 21:55, Apr 3
Pants? Caps? Rubbing in groins? I did a pub crawl like that once when I was at Uni. The scars will never fully heal... --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | GUN | Natter | Uh oh | Pee 21:58, Apr 3

edit Check this out!

[1] Look down to the "50 most edited articles" bit...

1470	99%	77	8	User talk:Cajek	25.9 MB  

I wonder how that happened... Just a pain when people keep spamming your talk page eh? MrN  Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 23:36, Apr 3

LOLEDIT!! ~Minitrue Sir SysRq! Talk! Sex! =/ GUNWotMRotMAotMVFHSKPEEINGHPBFF @ 23:47 Apr 3
That is interesting... does this mean I get respect? How much do I have to whore to get some respect?!   Le Cejak <Apr 04, 2008 [1:53]>

edit If I don't give you this, UU will go all silly on me

Wallace in wrong trousers You are not pants
MrN9000 could not help but notice that you are not pants.
As such, you have been awarded the Titanium Trousers by way of recognition.
Any suggestion that this is a pants award will be treated accordingly...

Pants. MrN  Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 02:04, Apr 4

Does this mean you'll talk to me?? I hate the silent treatment, N!   Le Cejak <Apr 04, 2008 [2:07]>
No. Well... Actually, I should really go to bed... Have a good one, and try not to werz the trouser out... MrN  Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 02:14, Apr 4
All silly? How silly, exactly, would I have gone? Gerbils down the trousers silly? I didn't realise I would go all silly.? Why would I go silly? Tell me? Question mark after an instruction silly? Thinking Meet The Spartans is a good film silly? I need quantification, dammit! --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | GUN | Natter | Uh oh | Pee 08:15, Apr 4
This whole thing has just all got far too silly. Also I should mention that putting a gerbil down your trousers is actually considered a local custom in my neck of the woods... MrN  Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 12:31, Apr 4
I have family in Yorkshire and live in Norfolk. As such, that sounds like dangerously civilised behaviour to me... --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | GUN | Natter | Uh oh | Pee 12:38, Apr 4
Yo'kshire? No'folk?   Le Cejak <Apr 04, 2008 [13:15]>
Norfolk eh? Yarmouth? Norwich? Naa, bet it's Ipswich! Was up in Yarmouth the other day actually... Not sure about those windmills up there. Seriously. Windmills in the sea? Eh? Um, actually it's more pronounced Yoooorksure... Those from Norfolk are typically so interbred that pronouncing anything is often impossible. Not like us West country folk yer no. Weees not like bin shaggin ur sis' or noffin now then... MrN  Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 13:30, Apr 4

edit UotM

Woo! You got nominated for UotM...I have a feeling Under User is going to thrash you, but even still you deserve the nomination, and the award, if you get it... :D - 05:39 4 AprilSir FSt. (QotF BFF NotM) YTTETalk!Read!Sign!Whore!CMC!Pee!

Vote UU for UUotM!   Le Cejak <Apr 04, 2008 [16:55]>
Vote UU? If you say so, oh lord and master...And's __CAJEK__ feature day (it just happens to be the only time I've spotted one of your articles featured on the front page, cause I usually skip going onto the uncyc homepage...Yay, congrats! - 07:48 5 AprilSir FSt. (QotF BFF NotM) YTTETalk!Read!Sign!Whore!CMC!Pee!
Yes! Vote UU, and only call me master when my self-esteem is low!   Le Cejak <Apr 05, 2008 [18:52]>
Yes, lord! - 06:40 7 AprilSir FSt. (QotF BFF NotM) YTTETalk!Read!Sign!Whore!CMC!Pee!

edit Thank you!

Hey Cajek, thank you very much! Also, I looked over UN:PRG: it's excellent. The only thing I would suggest is a section on

--Address the Article, not the Author--

The object of pee review is to review the article. However, more often than not, pee reviews discuss the particular merits of the author as opposed to focusing on the particular merits of the article. For example:

  • "You need [help]..."
  • "Wow [user], I'm surprised that you, in all your noobiness, could have..."
  • "You [suck]"

Combined together like this, they sound more like an author appraisal than anything else. Essentially, try to avoid using "you" in a review. Without "you", the reviewer will resort to focusing on the article. Also, without "you", I'll be a lonely man indeed. So, stay won't you?

If it's good, please feel free to expand upon it: it's missing some more salient points...I'm lazy, hahaha. Take care, Mightydandylion Icons-flag-us (talk) Fk 17:29, 4 April 2008 (UTC)

edit >=[

Ok I dunno if I have done this right but hey.

Ok right yano when you post a whatever you call it basicly telling people to give up and kill themselves!? WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN YOUR HEAD!? Im sorry but you seirously need to take that off! Change it or something! I know its ment as a joke but thats just too far! You cant joke about things like that! People who are suicidal need things to boost "their" confidence! Not bloody make jokes about "them!" Telling "them" to kill themselves!

"He" was doing fine till "he" read that. Please, take it off. Before you make someone else want to kill themselves. <<< Thats what im talking about.

I dunno if I have clicked all the right buttons to get this to you. I dont know if this will get to you. I hope it does. Before you kill someone.

Oooh, jeez. Let me just say that, if an article on Uncyclopedia is enough to push someone to commit suicide, they were probably going to do it anyway, and were just looking for an excuse... interesting, though.   Le Cejak <Apr 05, 2008 [0:36]>
Well, there's only one sentence on suicide in that article, but I can see what you're saying. However, this article is much more mundane than you suppose, in my opinion.   Le Cejak <Apr 05, 2008 [1:11]>
Howdy, friend. Firstly, please sign your posts when you leave a message on someone's talk page. Secondly, your notion that an article that deals more directly with the great American trend of "meh" attitude than with suicide can possibly singlehandedly drive someone to suicide is nonsensical. It is utterly naïve to believe that an article will spontaneously cause someone to give up. If you haven't noticed, there's more of a mockery of those who give up; it's an argument against doing so in a way.
In any case, it is in no way unique in Uncyclopedia articles. You, Loneliness, You Are Dead and many others which I don't care to name at this moment all deal with similar issues. Granted, You is a piece of crap which I plan to rewrite, but the idea is there. Please don't mistake us for a true influence on a person's life. If you've found yourself or a friend feeling suicidal after reading Uncyclopedia, I strongly encourage you to leave the Internet and seek help. Cordially, Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 03:22, 5 April 2008 (UTC)
May I take this opportunity to put all of the whiner's "them"s and "he"s and in quotation marks? - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon (Tick Tock) (Contribs) 15:13, Apr 5
"they" had BETTER kill themselves for all the fuss this is causing on one person's talk page!   Le Cejak <Apr 05, 2008 [15:26]>
^lawl, also as a wreader/righter, that theme of {{USERNAME}} sucks and is a loser seems to be a bit overused, it is good to laugh at yourself but it is not particularly funny if the reader is constantly being called worthless and stuff. It does however work if the mockery is totally overboard and unrealistic rather than seemingly personal, then it is funny. Also political satire FTW! --Sir DJ ~ Irreverent Icons-flag-au Noobaward Wotm Unbooks mousepad GUN 15:32, 5 April 2008 (UTC)

edit Welcome to Illogicland.

Hope you edit and stuff. Be a duck.... AND ON THE UNCYCLOPEDIA LOGO ON YOUR PAGE IS THAT THE MILK CARTON FROM COFFEE AND TV?! I love blur. amazing.-- Muhduckmuhduck |Fonchezzz| Quacking| Muhduckmuhduck2 15:00, 5 April 2008 (UTC)

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