User talk:Bradaphraser/archive8

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search

Make a separate header for each topic, as always. archive1 archive2 archive3 archive4 archive5 archive6 archive7

(If you miss something, it's probably archived)

Watch out!


About Ask Cthulhu

Are you the person who ran Ask Cthulhu? I ask because I am making a complementary column, called Ask Dr. Hypochondriac. The template, as you can see, is basically finished, complete with a real email address to send questions to. I have just one problem: how am I supposed to start out? Exactly how did Ask Cthulhu receive its first questions? I have a whole bunch of other questions I'm too lazy to put into words right now. Hopefully you can answer them. Gratefully, CUN RA Talk to me _ 01:39, 3 November 2007 (UTC)

I um... kinda cheated to start out. I started by asking people for questions on IRC. Then someone did it for me. But that may help you in some way... at least, I hope it does.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 02:50, 3 November 2007 (UTC)
Thanks for answering, but I'm afraid it doesn't. I don't know how to work IRC, I tried yesterday and could make neither heads nor tails of it. And I'm talking about just signing on, too. So, if you don't mind, and as long as we're on the subject, could tell me how the *%$#! IRC works? --CUN RA Talk to me _ 04:05, 3 November 2007 (UTC)
Sure! If you've got an IRC program (I recommend X-Chat), then you just connect to Freenode. Once in freenode, you connect to the #uncyclopedia channel. To do this, type "/join #uncyclopedia" in the little area you can type in at the bottom. If you can get the CGI-IRC working at Uncyclopedia:Chat, it takes care of the first few steps for you. As far as a username, just pick random ones until one works. There are no rules as far as names you can use except that it can't already be taken. Well, if there are other rules, I don't know them.  :)--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 10:32, 3 November 2007 (UTC)


~Jewriken.GIF 16:44, 3 December 2007 (UTC)

Have a not-shitty Christmas!

WinterBreakCalendar Heya, The Led Balloon here, wishing you merry Christmas, or any other holiday you feel like celebrating. Just remember what it's all really about: NO WORK, NO SCHOOL, FREE STUFF!!!
Here's to hoping your school(or work) calendar for December doesn't look too much like this...

Merry Christmas, - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 00:57, Dec 17

Bloody Pagans

Pagans, the Whole Lot of Yous

Premier Tom Mayfair has been a naughty boy this year, but he still deserves a kiss from under the mistletoe. His external organ is fair game.

SpacerSpacerPremierTomMayfairChe RedPhone Unsoc Hammer and sickle

Merry Christmas

Despite being required by British law to carry an umbrella throughout December, and to respond to all festive cheer with "Bah Humbug", nonetheless I wish you a very Merry Christmas. Or Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, or whatever other gnostic mystical mumbo-jumbo you colonials practice these days.
Just don't tell the Queen.


-- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 12:54, 17 December 2007 (UTC)

Mucho, mucho, X-mas wishes!

Keep the "X" in

Santa checks his list to see who's been naughty and who's been nice.

And naughty always makes out better at X-mas

Dame PPsigPPlips.gifGUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 01:25, 18 December 2007 (UTC)


Dam, you still here. Move on, Brad. --Boy Toy bitch at me 03:36, 21 December 2007 (UTC)

Did you SEE the pic right about this message? The chicks dig the admins. I don't understand it myself...--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 04:16, 21 December 2007 (UTC)

Merry Christmas

African babies that will make your heart melt with grief <center>WELL TONIGHT, THANK GOD IT'S THEM INSTEAD OF YOU.

Merry Christmas.

- STM</center>

People's Republic of China

Some fucking idiot messed things up big time. This is how the article use to look with my last edit and my many contributions to a developing article:

Now go to the page; some complete pro-Communist-China douchebag edited the page to make THE ENTIRE THING SERIOUS, ABSOLUTELY SERIOUS AND BORING. Yes, I'm serious, it looks like it's straight out of - gasp - WIKIPEDIA! No joke.

So I went to the edit page to show this guy what-for, and realized uncyclopedia doesn't have an "undo" option like wikipedia. There is way too much crap to wade through in order to fix this gigantic mess he created. Can you handle this asshole? You seem like a responsible administrator who knows what to do with douchebags like this.--PericlesofAthens 01:22, 9 January 2008 (UTC)

Responsible, what? You obviously don't know me very well. Try Ban Patrol for stuff like this.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 13:10, 9 January 2008 (UTC)
Awesome, thanks.--PericlesofAthens 13:20, 9 January 2008 (UTC)
Yeah, I'm amazed he's actually replied to you within the same month. Really awesome. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb (talk to me)

PLS Judging

I'm sending you this because you are signed up to judge the Poo Lit Surprise. If you no longer want to judge or are incapable of doing so, please tell me as soon as possible. If you're still good to go then here are the instructions:

First, read all of the articles in your specified category. Second, judge them. Judge how you like, as long as it's at least fair and based on merit (one suggestion would be to use the Pee Review format). Post your top 5 articles here. Hit me up on my talk page for questions, comments, if these rules are not cognizant within you, or of you don't know what the word "cognizant" means.

Thank you again for your valued participation in the balletic train wreck that is the Poo Lit Surprise! --Hotadmin4u69 [TALK] 23:32, 27 January 2008 (UTC)


Bradley! My conspirator in conspiracy theory. He's king of his domain until his wife comes home. Then, he comes to Uncyc and becomes king once again!

Thank you for your support in the Writer of the Year competition my friend. From the bottom of my shallow-yet-very-regal heart, I sincerely appreciate it. --THINKER 18:21, 2 February 2008 (UTC)

Let's never mention this again, eh?

--Hotadmin4u69 [TALK] 20:47, 10 February 2008 (UTC)

You are a cute little kitten

  • When I asked what people thought, the best comment I got was "I could have made that. You should have chopped the kitten into a lazer shooting dinosaur" (Squiggle). Any comments from you? Hope you like you. -- Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 03:11, 26 February 2008 (UTC)
'Tis gut! I'll soon add it to my collection of rotating images on my front page, and then, I'll rule the world! After the middle step, of course.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 13:14, 26 February 2008 (UTC)

You have a lot of polls

Any special reason you're sharing them all over the place? - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 03:06, Mar 5

I'm sick of waiting for a rating system. I started putting them in myself.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 03:07, 5 March 2008 (UTC)
So, just your articles, then? - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 03:08, Mar 5
Yeah, so far. We'll see how that works.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 03:12, 5 March 2008 (UTC)

You're late to...

Forum:The Great Pake Debate of '08. I assume it's because you were out farming and lost track of time. Yes, I honestly believe that you're a farmer. Get used to it. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 21:12, 22 March 2008 (UTC)


Can you please semi-protect User:Flutter/eGame/POTUS_poll, pretty please?—Flutter (TalkGamesFun PagesAwardsHelp) 07:55, 23 March 2008 (UTC)

Done, though I'm disappointed I wasn't on the list.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 11:18, 23 March 2008 (UTC)

Welcome to me!

My user name is now Gangstah! --Gangstah fo shizzle 22px-Flag of AustraliaMUNTalkContributionsArticleForum 02:00, 13 April 2008 (UTC)

Thanks, dude. Now I'll remember this moment FOREVER.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 02:14, 13 April 2008 (UTC)


Remember when you unbanned Nintendorulez? He has an ED account. I know i supported the unbanning but i made a mistake. Spread the word.--MNM5150Talk Dirty To Me Failings 20:40, 3 May 2008 (UTC)

So does TKF. Perhaps you'd have him deopped? - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 23:59, May 3
Really? I checked NIN's contributions over there, and they (6) were made before he was banned. Sorry.--MNM5150Talk Dirty To Me Failings 00:23, 4 May 2008 (UTC)
I'm confused... who are you again?--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 00:58, 4 May 2008 (UTC)
Just a Dude.--MNM5150Talk Dirty To Me Failings 00:20, 5 May 2008 (UTC)
Ah, cool. Carry on then. Ok, what did I do wrong again?--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 01:10, 5 May 2008 (UTC)
Never mind.--MNM5150Talk Dirty To Me Failings 01:47, 5 May 2008 (UTC)


Please can you delete Game:Y3K Game:Pork Game:DevilGrue & Game:Edwyn þe Almyghty, (all pages) along with there template and category. Mind the strikes, MrN did it. Yeah, lotsa huffing to do. These 4 games are probably replaced by Game:Death Row. The 4 games are all crap now. They waste space. Sorry if I bothered you. Thanks.--Gelert 23:36, 18 June 2008 (UTC)


Hey could you please delete my account/profile. I signed up for the wrong internet site.

Thank You.

At the risk of getting in Brad's way, here... You can't get your account deleted. Just don't log in anymore. - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 15:42, Jun 26

Join The CMC! Make Your Inner Cow Happy!

Moo, Bradaphraser!

What is it about cows that gets us all hot and bothered? Where do cows come from? What are cows?

These are the questions that drive the Cow Moo Cult and its brethren, who are very, VERY interested in cows and cow by-products.

The CMC is devoted not only to cows, but to helping Uncyclopedia through general acts of goodness and through motivating people with cow-treats and the like.

So, Bradaphraser, why not join the CMC? It's free (unless you count virginity as money) and it's fun (and it's full of clichés)! You'll get a pretty template for your userpage and a nice title for your signature! What could be better? Sign Up Now!
Double moos from your cowy friend,


For that whole "Brad hates America" thing. It appears to have had some blowback. I, having hung around the nuttier, big "C" Conservative sites (like WorldNetDaily and for too long (doing research for Uncyclopedia pages, believe it or not), thought it was funny. "X hates America" is about as common as "Darwin to Hitler" and crass biblical literalism in places like that. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 17:12, 24 July 2008 (UTC)

Yeah, I was kidding. I was trying to show Orion how silly getting upset at Uncyclopedia is. I guess I suck at that.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 20:33, 24 July 2008 (UTC)
You're right. You do suck. Don't tell OB I said that. It will be our little secret, like that time I covered up that thing you did to that guy in that place by taking that guy's dead body out to the woods and burying it. That was a fun cab ride out to the woods. Like Weekend at Bernies, but with multiple stab wounds and oozing. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 21:43, 24 July 2008 (UTC)
As they say in the new Batman movie, slaughter is the best medicine.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 22:50, 24 July 2008 (UTC)
There's a new Batman movie? Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 23:53, 24 July 2008 (UTC)
Yeah. The *pow* effects are much better. No bat-shark repellent, though, so I demanded my money back.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 00:04, 25 July 2008 (UTC)
The first remake was pretty good. Y'know, the one with Buster Keaton and Jack Nicklaus. LeVar Burton directed it, I believe. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 00:09, 25 July 2008 (UTC)
Was that the one with Mariah Carey?--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 02:13, 25 July 2008 (UTC)
No, that one came later. It sucked. Michael Schumacher is an awful director. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 03:04, 25 July 2008 (UTC)

Join the UnOrder Today!


~ Readmesoon

Isn't it counter-productive to advertise a group that's main claim to fame is that it's the least-known order?--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 11:36, 17 August 2008 (UTC)

Domain Name

I skimmed the topic about it, and some of it seems sort of old, so would you mind giving a short update on where exactly things are at? I was actually considering posting an invitation on the political site I go to, to help get some more writers for UnNews. But after I saw the domain, and the adjoining "big announcement presented in a consciously affable and disarming way" presented by Sannse, I sort of don't think it would be the best idea... ~Sir Rangeley Icons-flag-us GUN WotM UotM EGA +S (talk) 17:41, 23 October 2008 (UTC)

Not at the moment. I'm still considering editing here, but I'm not sure at the moment.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 21:57, 23 October 2008 (UTC)
P. S. Out of curiosity, how many forms does Ron Paul have?--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 21:58, 23 October 2008 (UTC)
There was never any official forum (like a "MyObama" or whatever for Obama) that was on his website, but the one I linked you to has always been the most active and sort of the "official" grassroots one, where money bombs were organized and such. After the primaries it's shifted to other related grassroots projects, like money bombs for congressional candidates, opposing the bailout, etc. I don't think there was ever really any other prominent ones. ~Sir Rangeley Icons-flag-us GUN WotM UotM EGA +S (talk) 02:21, 24 October 2008 (UTC)
Brad, if you ever leave us, I will hunt you down and make pee soup out of you, so help me Olipro. Also - Rangeley - hollar your ass back here will ya? ~Jewriken.GIF 22:00, 23 October 2008 (UTC)
As for the sitrep: wikia changed our domain to drive up views for for whatever reason. We didn't like that. They did it anyway. Now, I think we're aiming for a) getting them to put it back how it was, or b) releasing the project so it can be hosted independently. Most admins have stopped editing in the mean time, irc is the place to go if you want more discussion (if you can cut through the crap). That's pretty much it, I think. Spang talk 02:41, 24 Oct 2008
I think I will stop by IRC. ~Sir Rangeley Icons-flag-us GUN WotM UotM EGA +S (talk) 02:53, 24 October 2008 (UTC)


MoaP Reindeer thanks you for voting!

Personnally I don't know what that guy was so worked up about. I just wanted to correct his mistake...

Also hello! I don't think we've talked before, nice to meet you. SK Sir Orian57Talk Gay flag RotM 12:34 17 November 2008

Same here. 'Twas a nice article.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 13:49, 17 November 2008 (UTC)

Merry Christmas

Bonner would like to wish you

a Merry Christgame
And a happy New Game
P.S, You just lost the game
BonSig.png (Bonner) Icons-flag-gb (Talk)

Happy Hanukkah


Festivus-card Happy Festivus, from The Led Balloon and Jerry Stiller. Put up your Festivus Pole, air your grievances, and prepare for the feats of strength, for festivus cannot continue until I am pinned! Oh, and merry Christmas if you're into that sort of thing.
It's a Festivus miracle!

- P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 20:17, Dec 21

Here's Your Christmas Tree

----Pleb- Sawblade5 [citation needed] ( yell | FAQ | I did this ) 09:18, 25 December 2008 (UTC)

Damn Right!

Santa is watching you shower, <insert name here>

Dear Brad,

It's nice to be speaking to you again. It's been awhile.

About a week ago, whilst aimlessly browsing this great internet of ours, I decided to take my quarterly glance at the old uncyclopedia and noticed, much to my dismay, that the old uncyclopedia had become the new For the last few days I've been perusing the dump, trying to establish the details of just what exactly led to this terrible change of fortune. Unfortunately, I hate reading and most it seems most topics on the subject seem to only be about 1/5 content, the remaining 80% drama (as it is apparently referred to these days).

So, what I ask of you, in my most polite and sweet voice (echoing my former pre-pubescent squeal) is a brief, very brief, summary of events on the subject, and only if it's not too much trouble. Seeing as I haven't been around in oh... two years or so, I don't think I deserve to have any say in the decision making that is almost definitely taking place, but perhaps you could outline the community's current options as well.

Thank you Brad, I've enjoyed very much using my most formal letter-writing voice for this brief stint on your talk page, but it's growing very tiresome and I'm not sure how much longer I'll be able to hold up. I hope to hear from you soon.

With love, empathy, and hella gratitude,

Tompkinssig Smallturtle t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites

05:46, 31 December 2008 (UTC)

Oh you missed the greatest crisis in our history! Poor you. Well, let me sum up. Wikia shows up one day (as they do) and asks us to pick a "" page to move Uncyclopedia. We reply "you'll move us to .wikia when hell freezes over and world peace ensues." Wikia, misunderstanding what we meant, goes ahead and moves us. Chaos follows as admins begin vandalizing the pages of the wiki to try to prove to Wikia that they really should move us to "" if a "" move is really necessary. Wikia is unimpressed. We hold a vote to choose representatives and look for a new server to move the site to, or in the unlikely case of Wikia moving us back to where we go, staying with Wikia. That's where we been for, oh, two months now.
Incidentally, you were the one person I mentioned that I most wanted to hear from again in the Forum:Inactive User Survey.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 12:57, 31 December 2008 (UTC)
:) I'm sure I would've done the same, but you know.. opposite. Two months this has been going on and still no solution, it's amazing what a truly organized group of humor writers can do when they set their collective mind to it. Although I have to admit, was a brilliant idea on someone's part.
Is it true people are leaving over this? I mean, I completely understand, and admit I probably would've left under similar circumstances, but you and Mhaille, Codeine and whoever else is sticking around really deserve some kudos. If uncyclopedia makes it through this we'll have you to thank.
I can think of so many reasons why Wikia was wrong for doing this, and frankly I don't understand why some of those within the company who also count themselves as members of the uncyc community didn't protest such a move. For one, it seems our non-commercial license is increasingly in jeopardy given Wikia's ever-growing presence, and I hope those contributing to any Wikia site realize who their intellectual labor is really benefiting.
That being said, as you mentioned: a quick look at Wikia's alexa stats shows that sadly, uncyclopedia seems to have little effect on a website with such a massive amount of page views every day. Incidentally, an all out boycott of the uncyclopedia.wikia namespace would do little to convince the higher ups of our value. The only other act of vengeance I can think of would be to vandalize all of wikia, but that seems likely to backfire :).
Moving the site entirely would be tough, although some are making it out to be more difficult than I imagine it will be (legal trouble doesn't really worry me). With such a move we would be likely to lose even more members, as I doubt Wikia would remove the site from it's servers, perhaps you remember similar difficulty when Rataube attempted to move the Spanish uncyclopedia. These losses would not necessarily be permanent, but a plan would need to be in place to regain traffic.
Also, I'm not positive about this, but doesn't Wikia own the namespace? Meaning that any move would end up with the site still being listed as uncyclopedia.whatever. All of this, in my opinion, means that are best chance is to attempt direct negotiation with Wikia, but before doing so it would be beneficial to have the infrastructure in place to immediately leave the wikia namespace should talks fail (this would also be a helpful bargaining tool).
Anyway, just my thoughts, let me know if there is any way I can help. I'm pretty busy currently, but I'm willing to make time to help uncyc, maybe I'll even write an article someday. Tompkinssig Smallturtle t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites 20:01, 31 December 2008 (UTC) 20:01, 31 December 2008 (UTC)
Yes, Wikia does hold our balls. Given how they ripped our nuts off, it only makes sense. We would like to get our domain namespace back, naturally, but we'll have to wait for the POWARZ that be to finish their preparations before moving on to the torch and pitchfork stage. As it stands now, we are stuck in a holding pattern. I'll let you know how you can help when you can help, but your best bet is to wait until we move somewhere brilliant, then write something else. Or perhaps reverse that.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 20:14, 31 December 2008 (UTC)
Alright, that sounds fine. Hey, I've been meaning to ask you, do you remember in IRC, a long time ago, when we were discussing who should be president, and I said Barack Obama, and you said John McCain? It was before they were even candidates in the primaries, I wish I had the quote, I'd post it somewhere.. Tompkinssig Smallturtle t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites 23:30, 31 December 2008 (UTC) 23:30, 31 December 2008 (UTC)
I don't remember that, but I did feel they were the best two candidates their parties could field. I still do (though John kinda dropped the ball).--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 23:31, 31 December 2008 (UTC)
Ah, well it happened, almost positive. Yes, apparently people don't like racist innuendo, and that's probably a good thing, almost positive. Tompkinssig Smallturtle t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites 23:45, 31 December 2008 (UTC) 23:45, 31 December 2008 (UTC)
Yeah, John probably could have done better than find a VP who starts every sentence with "Now I'm not a racist, but..."--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 00:12, 1 January 2009 (UTC)
TTTTOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMPPPPPPPKKKIIIIIIIINNNNNNNSSSSSSS! Hi! Welcome back! Remember me? You unbanned me once. Good times, man, good times. - T.L.B. Baloon WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 00:15, Jan 1
I do indeed remember you, not the blocking part, but I'll take your word for it. This is not a welcome back occasion, more of a brief sighting. Tompkinssig Smallturtle t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites 07:09, 1 January 2009 (UTC) 07:09, 1 January 2009 (UTC)

Song of the South

Hey, Brad. No I don't have a problem with your changes to the article. In fact I think that gag is much clearer now. Thanks for nomming it, BTW. I've always quite liked this one, but I've never nommed it myself because I was worried that the tone was to dark. Er, so to speak. --Cap'n Sir Ben GUN WotM VFH VFP 08:22, 21 January 2009 (UTC)

Heh heh, yeah. Well, it's good stuff. I can't wait to see it on the front page.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 12:39, 21 January 2009 (UTC)
I've said it before and I'll say it again, how Uncle, sorry Cap'n, Ben doesn't have more featured articles is a mystery to me. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb (talk to me)
I personally have no idea how YOU are listed higher up in the slut list. ~Jewriken.GIF 16:13, 21 January 2009 (UTC)
Talent and hard work, my boy..... -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb (talk to me)

Personal tools