User talk:BetterSkatez2012

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edit Welcome to Uncyclopedia

Spike the Dog (06b)
Spike is a grumpy old dog. You can stroke his fur, or you can be smitten by his stick. It is up to you.

Hello, BetterSkatez2012, and welcome to Uncyclopedia. This is a wiki (a collection of pages anyone can edit). Words in blue are "links" and can be clicked to take you to another page. This wiki is for comedy. It pretends it's Wikipedia, but we make people laugh, not bore them. If you aren't interested in a fake encyclopedia but in writing fake news stories, we have UnNews, and there are other projects for scripts, lyrics, how-to guides, and so on.

What you can do

You can create your own article. For starters, create it under your own name; for example, User:BetterSkatez2012/Bedbug. (The red instead of blue is a link to a page that doesn't yet exist.) We have a list of articles that need to be created. You can help without writing articles; just read articles and, if you see an improvement in writing or in comedy, jump in and edit it. In fact, you can help without writing at all, such as organizing, watching for vandals, or even greeting other new users.

What you need

To write articles, you need a sense of humor and an ability to write good English. We all have strengths and weaknesses and you can get help in any area. But everyone needs an ability to work with other people. Be polite, positive, and helpful toward others, and assume others are doing the same toward you.

What to read

Here are some pages that might help you:

For personal help
  • The administrators are willing to help you, and several Uncyclopedians are willing to adopt you.
  • I will watch this page for a while and will know if you edit it. Afterward, you can contact me on my own talk page.
  • If you've written an article, we have a Proofreading service where someone will correct your mistakes, and a review process where an experienced Uncyclopedian will read your article and suggest improvements.
How to post to talk pages

Please follow these general rules:

  • Add comments at the end of a talk page so people notice them.
  • Start your paragraphs with one or more : characters to indent them and set them off from other people's posts.
  • At the end, type ~~~~ (four tildes), which gets replaced by your user name and the current date and time.
  • Don't delete anyone's messages. In case of any controversy, we depend on an accurate record of what was written. You may disavow your remarks by striking them through like this.

I hope you enjoy it here and write a lot of funny stuff! Spıke ¬ 23:35 30-Apr-13

edit User:BetterSkatez2012/Kids bop

Hello and welcome to the website, You seem to know what a sentence is because you start them with a capital letter, But you seem to have a broken period key and you just use comma, Another thing that needs to be improved about this article is it's mostly lists, The problem with this is that Anons show up all night and add unfunny items to the end of it, I know you don't want to spend your life here pruning those back, By the way "bop" probably needs a capital B, I am moving this article to your userspace where you can edit it at the name shown above, Take as long as you need. Spıke ¬ 23:35 30-Apr-13

edit Your latest article

I have moved Hurricane into your user-space. You can find it here. By all means, continue to work on it, but don't contribute articles to main-space until they're pretty much finished. Once you feel it is ready, get someone to have a look at it and ask them to move it back. Good luck. Sir Reverend P. Pennyfeather (fancy a chat?) CUN VFH PLS 23:01, June 4, 2013 (UTC)

edit Global warming

Yes, I know "passing gas" means farting. I wrote "passing gas" because I wanted the article to be delicate and encyclopedic. I undid your edit for the same reason. Sorry! Spıke ¬ 23:04 4-Jun-13

edit Last night's edits

As you are a registered Uncyclopedian, I'll explain why I undid your recent edits:

  • Dora the Explorer: The article didn't need another quote; the only humor of your quote was calling Dora an illegal Mexican--and moving on to dog poop as though that related to anything; and you didn't use {{Q}} correctly.
  • Bleach: Again, the article didn't need a quotation. Show named Bleach--drinking bleach? Not clever. "When I drinked bleach"? Not English.
  • Roller coaster: Makes a long list much longer. Unfunny quips like calling people "retarded" out-of-the-blue. Concluding that riders are "fucked" is unfunny and unencyclopedic, also referring to the reader as "you." More non-English like "Though it was drunk that you go reverse on what a loop would normally be doing, Plus you can eat it,"
  • HowTo:Get Arrested: This article, with seven methods, was not crying out for an 8th, especially one consisting of just a couple dumb lists; I say "dumb" because Malls, Strip clubs, Roads, and China has no explanation; it is as though you expect just listing the words to be funny.
  • Nicki Minaj: Cut-and-pasting a listy template into the text looks ugly; your new Section 2 doesn't relate to anything Section 1 was saying; it's a "fanboy rant" and in-your-face.

If you read How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid, slowly, you might learn how to write funny stuff. I do not know who will help you with the correct past tenses of verbs, but we do have a Proofreading Service (see above). Most of these changes, however, stick random stuff at the start of articles which, if they do anything, will convince other readers not to continue with the article. Sorry to revert you. Spıke ¬ 10:38 5-Jun-13

edit Roller coaster

I reverted you because your changes did not describe track design, but rather entirely new types of roller coasters. Also, you were adding on to an already long list, which is what we call "listcruft". Uncyclopedia is not a collection of lists, and everybody thinks their own contribution is funny, whether it is or not. Your contribution did not fit in the section, which describes track designs which are also listed in Wikipedia's Roller coaster article. Track design refers to the way the coaster is built. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 23:32, June 5, 2013 (UTC)

edit User:BetterSkatez2012/Roblox

Reading through this article (briefly) shows me that you haven't read HTBFANJS. The sections 4 and onwards are pure list cruft, and the only thing that saves this from a VFD nomination is the construction template. The overuse of {{C}} is horribly distracting - especially as this doesn't have any effect on an iDevice except ████████████ which you can understand is extremely frustrating. It's also ugly, and even when it does work is a very cheap gag.

You use large numbers which very rarely add any humour to an article and are distracting. There are shit and fart jokes peppered throughout, which rarely add humour. Section 1 (the first section after the contents) is unfunny and useless, and the 3rd section is so blanked out that any humour in here is lost immediately. But removing all of these issues, the article reads like a petulant rant against something you dislike, and as such is funny to nobody other than yourself. Anyone who is interested in Roblox would stop reading quickly as it's reads like a childish opinion, and anybody not interested would stop reading because it's unfunny and ugly.

If you want to write a good article about Roblox - or in fact any topic at all - I strongly urge you to read HTBFANJS, as your articles at the moment are JS. I'd also suggest reading through previous feature articles to see what actually is of value. This current article is a template short of deletion, and without stripping it down completely and rewriting it with a decent concept is destined for the scrap yard.                               Puppy's talk page12:14 08 Sep 2013

No, what is saving this article from VFD is nothing but its newness, as VFD is only for articles over a week old. But I concur entirely that this article is of flagrantly low quality. For this reason, the article is now in userspace, and author can repair it at the address shown at the start of this section. Spıke ¬ 12:22 8-Sep-13

edit User:BetterSkatez2012/Kidz Bop

This article has moved back to your userspace, at the address shown above. None of the issues in the {{ICU}} tag or that Simsilikesims and I have discussed here have been addressed; all that has happened is that it has gotten much longer and now has an Infobox. Please keep it at this address until it becomes funny to the general reader. Spıke ¬ 16:34 2-Oct-13

PS--This means that the article is not ready for mainspace. This means that we don't want a redirect in mainspace that points to this article in userspace with the goal of evading the userspacing. Not even if you do it without logging in, and I have no doubt it's you, as no one else would want to read it. Not even if you could code a redirect correctly. Spıke ¬ 18:38 7-Oct-13

edit File:MoonFlag.jpg‎

Hello! I reverted your edit to this file. Files on images no more need custom logos than talk pages of articles do. These pages exist to help us editors find images. For example, if a page has a detailed description of what the picture contains, then we may be able to find it using the search function, or with Google. Attaching categories to these pages also helps. It would be more useful to focus your comedy on the parts of our encyclopedia that are aimed at our readers. Spıke ¬ 19:59 16-Oct-13

edit Article

I assumed the article you wrote and quickly placed on VFD was you requesting its deletion. If you want a copy back, ask on my talk page and I'll restore it to your userspace. ~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) Icons-flag-au 05:53, November 3, 2013 (UTC)

Yes; if you just want one of your own articles deleted--especially one in your private space--just list it on QVFD. If you want someone else's opinion on it, ask for a Pee Review. In fact, at VFD you got one voter to do a mini-review of it; namely, that joke has been told before. Spıke ¬ 12:52 3-Nov-13

edit Lord of the Rings (disambiguation)

I think the person getting to that point in the page is interested in Tolkien stuff, while you are talking about something else completely, built around a single pun. But it makes a cute disambiguation page, so my solution was to move it to the above new page, which is now pointed to at the start of the page you edited. Spıke ¬ 02:56 8-Nov-13

edit File:For Uncyclopedia.jpg

For Pete's sake! given that every single photo that's uploaded is uploaded "for Uncyclopedia," don't you think you could give your upload a name that's a tiny bit descriptive? Spıke ¬ 01:23 11-Nov-13

edit User:BetterSkatez2012/Planet Ass

I made an article, I made using a userspace.

Can you read the article and answer on my talk page to determine if the article is funny enough to be on the mainspace or not, please and thank you. BetterSkatez2012 (talk) 00:56, November 16, 2013 (UTC)

I have read the article. The first question the senior editors ask of any article: Why is this supposed to be funny? (What is the comedy plan or comedy strategy?) In my opinion, the only answer is that it is funny to write about shit and shitting. But it is funny for the writer, not so funny for the reader.
This is, I say again, a satire encyclopedia. The reader looks up real things and reads articles that are funny. I hate to say it, but Planet Ass does not exist. No one will call for an article about Planet Ass in our encyclopedia or any other one. If they do, they will read jokes that might be written on the wall of a public toilet!
These are two fundamental problems with the article. Spıke ¬ 01:21 16-Nov-13

edit Club Penguin

With apologies, I reverted your edit here. "Polar nights" seems like a concept that could be made funny, but your addition neither explains to the outsider what a polar night is (at this nightclub) nor adds enough to turn it into a joke. Please try again. Always imagine you are a reader six time zones to the west and stop laughing long enough to ask yourself if he will laugh with you. Spıke ¬ 10:24 16-Nov-13

edit User:BetterSkatez2012/Moon_Expedition

I made an article in a userspace and I wanted you to read to to determine if the article is funny or not, please. The preceding unsigned comment was added by BetterSkatez2012 (talk • contribs)

General: Please read How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid. This isn't a general-purpose fan fiction site; it is supposed to look like an encyclopedia, though there are other, non-encyclopedia projects, and that article will tell you about them. What you are writing about, that someone would look up in an encyclopedia, is Apollo 11. (Our existing article is about the movie.)
Specific: Sex with aliens, farting for rocket propulsion. It seems the medium you are looking for is the wall of a toilet stall. Photos: three stacked up on the right and three on the left, ugly. Quotes that do nothing for the reader, including one by Oscar Wilde. Then two more sections of saying goofy things at random that just barely relate to Moon Expedition. Section 2 has very bad English. Article is way too short for mainspace.

There it is. Spıke ¬ 03:21 17-Nov-13

edit Hi!

I noticed you use a signature template to sign your posts when you don't have one! Why don't you give UN:SIG a read? It will help! --Mimo&Maxus (Talk) 09:25, November 17, 2013 (UTC)

edit USERNAME template abuse

Making a copy of this in your userspace is a good precaution if the vote goes against you. However, returning an article to the main encyclopedia, if VFD votes to delete it, without major improvement, would be very bad. If the page is deleted but you repair your copy, you should submit your page to a formal review. My personal opinion is that this page embodies the "joke" of turning the reader into the joke and it isn't possible to fix it. Spıke ¬ 23:22 17-Nov-13

edit BetterSkatez2012 is a noob

Without answering the rhetorical question posed by this article:

  1. Do not create articles about yourself in mainspace.
  2. If you want a new article deleted and you are the only contributor, list it on QVFD.

In this case, as the page has only one version, you could have gotten the same effect by simply not saving it. In other words, the only point was to create unnecessary work for the Admins. Spıke ¬ 19:17 30-Nov-13

Okay, you're unbanned because I didn't see that you had moved it out of mainspace. However:

  1. You didn't move it to your own account and
  2. Moving it still leaves a pointer to it in mainspace, and you need to list the pointer on QVFD. Spıke ¬ 19:21 30-Nov-13

You got another reply to your inquiry on my talk page, from Admin Simsilikesims, who is more pleasant than I. Spıke ¬ 22:24 2-Dec-13

edit Yeah, I deserved the ban!

I did. BetterSkatez2012 (talk) 01:35, December 8, 2013 (UTC)

Thank you for your understanding! Yes, the servers were like molasses yesterday. It happens. Spıke ¬ 02:00 8-Dec-13

edit Userspace rules

Stating that someone is a pedophile, if they are not famous, is cyberbullying. If they are famous, and there is no clear humor purpose, then it could be considered libel. Cyberbullying is not permitted in Uncyclopedia, even in userspace. Libel, if not removed by admins, will be removed by wikia staff should a complaint be filed. Finally, simply stating that somebody famous is a pedophile, is not funny by itself. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 04:28, December 11, 2013 (UTC)

Sorry, I didn't know, I wasn't trying to cyberbully him but it seem that I did, I'll try and change to something that will make uncyclopedia more satisfied. BetterSkatez2012 (talk) 20:44, December 11, 2013 (UTC)

edit New versions of images

There is some chronic server problem such that, when you select a different version of the image, you don't always see it take effect immediately. Please go back, unblank the page, pick the image you want, and check in the morning to see if it took effect. Also as a reminder, don't change any image that someone else is also using on other pages. If someone finds an additional use for an image you uploaded, pick a new name for any new version. Spıke ¬ 02:50 13-Dec-13

It was by accident, I wasn't trying to make a new version of an image! BetterSkatez2012 (talk) 05:00, December 14, 2013 (UTC)

edit introductions ala spikes suggestion.

Hi , Spikes says for me to say to you hi.

Hello, howdy and how do you do.

I am going by OMGwhatHaveIdone (talk) 21:43, December 20, 2013 (UTC) here.

I am working of flubbing a few things like trycorders and zappering. I was also wondering about reviewing and sprucing and sending my spark through the nether reachs here.

pleasure.

edit Top 10 of 2013

Thank you for checking out the forum and thank you for contributing! Only, when top 10 articles of any year are chosen, only articles that were featured during that year can be nominated. The one that you put up was not featured. Sorry. But you are welcome to vote for any article which is already there and nominate others that reached the main page in 2013, to find them you can use these links: Uncyclopedia:Best of/2013 (by date) and Uncyclopedia:Best_of#2013 (alphabetical order). Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 16:11, January 3, 2014 (UTC)

edit Oymyakon

This looks like an Uncyclopedia article! I don't know how notable Oymyakon will be to the typical reader, though. A mini-review:

  • Go easy on the statistics and percentages. Numerals aren't funny, and absurd numerals make your article seem less like an encyclopedia article.
  • Writing about poop/shit/fuck/rape will amuse you a lot more than it will amuse some readers. Even "the middle of fucking nowhere" is not a lot funnier than "the middle of nowhere."
  • Just saying that something is shitty isn't funny. It can be if you choose your words well, and it can be if you make a clever case that there is a good reason it got that way. Without that, it will just be one of a thousand pages that claim that "my town sucks."
  • Always reread your stuff pretending it's for the first time and look for mistakes. You have "decided to visit so he decided to visit." You are using capital letters much better than in the early days, but occasionally some text that should be 2 sentences are 1, and vice versa. Note that "it's" only means "it is"--when you mean "of it" then there is no apostrophe.

I hope that helps! Spıke ¬ 17:59 5-Jan-14

edit Barney and Friends

You ought not start an article with an explanation/apology (or even overuse templates to do so). It's safe in your userspace, and even if it arrives in the main encyclopedia, you can provide explanation using the article's talk page. By all means have the Intro include a hint to the reader that identifies Barney as the TV character (perhaps in a photo) and not some personal friend of yours you are cyberbullying. If you re-read it at the end and decide that, despite this, it reads too much like an "attack," that would be a problem — but you could solve the problem with more careful writing. Cheers! Spıke ¬ 22:14 29-Jan-14

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