From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
- Ukaine (collaboration with Scott);
- Probability theory (all the final comments)
- UnSignpost (beginning)
edit Ukraine Structure
- (Need to split up your talk page into headings to be easier to refer to)
So this is what we have:
- Culture/Tradition - Cuisine - Football - Ukraine Reversal
- Politics - Parliament - Parties - Policies
- History - (Four eras)
- Geography - Human - Physical (- Animal?(Get the joke!))
- Important characters
- Influence on culture (parody of Wikipedia as they have this section very often)
I don't think it will look right: Culture:
- Influence on culture
- If put here, it would look better if the heading were The military influence. Or have a separate section Military with subsection Influences on the culture. The best organization won't be clear until we see what you've written. 12:44 2-May-13
- PS: For your sections such as Ancient History (1991-1997)--Maybe introduce each one with a name as though it were archaeology, such as "Yanoukovinian Epoch." 13:26 2-May-13
Bit confused there as to what I'm meant to name Yanoukovin (as we've called him (need to check the history mistakes as a lot I copied from original article)). Thanks. Sir ScottPat UnS CUN VFH and Bar (talk) 20:14 28, April 2015
- Indeed, I was suggesting a possible comedy subplot, not hoping to dictate the correct spelling of anything. 18:39 2-May-13
- Scott, I was wondering if we could make a joke about Ukrainian president. The reader might be confused about why we call him Yanoukovin. Maybe we should tell, for instance, that he changed his name from Ianoukovitch to Yanoukovin when he saw that Putin became the Russian president. You can leave this for me and I will add it to the history part. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 10:10, May 3, 2013 (UTC)
edit Probability theory final
Spike, thank you for correcting my grammar mistakes, that is my biggest problem!
Scott, after your great review I have worked a lot on my article and I think that I have improved everything I had to. If someone has any suggestions about it, feel free to share! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 12:27, May 2, 2013 (UTC)
edit Past versus perfect
“Also, in 2000, Vladimir Putin has become Russian president”
When you are describing a single event in the past--which is the case here and which will usually be the case in an encyclopedia, real or satire--the simple past tense is the best. In 2000, Putin became president.
When you are describing a period stretching from a past event to the present, this is when you use the perfect tense: Putin has been president (continuum) ever since he became president (event) in 2000.
When describing a period stretching from a past event to another past event, use the past perfect: Putin had been president (continuum) from 2000 to yesterday, when Russia slipped into the ocean (event), probably to be closer to California, which had done so (event prior to another event) the day before.00:00 4-May-13
edit More on Ukraine (when will we ever get onto a new talk page topic!)
I personally don't like the picture of the supporters of the Ukrainian animal party as although I can see the joke I don't find it particularly relevant (or very funny) and think that there should be either no picture there or a picture that is actually to do with the Ukraine itself. Thanks. Sir ScottPat UnS CUN VFH and Bar (talk) 20:14 28, April 2015
Thanks. By the way while you are doing that could you please consider write an article for UnSignpost as we need some desperately. Thank you. Sir ScottPat UnS CUN VFH and Bar (talk) 20:14 28, April 2015
I think we are almost done except for language. I don't think we should have an "influence on culture" section or "important people" section unless you have any really good ideas. Once you've finished everything you want to do let me know and I'll send it off to the proofreader.
On the subject of "language," I'll let you do that paragraph. My idea would be to have really bad grammatically structured Russian and then pass it off as Ukranian:
Example: Ukranian: Good the day is too sir you! (in Russian) English: Greetings sir.
I trust you speak Russian to be able to do that. However I had second thoughts on this idea as English people won't get the joke and we are on an English Uncyclopedia so you'll have to think about that one. Sir ScottPat UnS CUN VFH and Bar (talk) 20:14 28, April 2015
Sure, I have some ideas. Yesterday, I couldn't answer your supply for help about UnSignpost: do you want me to write an article for the next one? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 11:38, May 5, 2013 (UTC)
edit Express Delivery...is not available today (just normal delivery)
I have finished the language part. Do you want me to write an article for the next UnSignpost? Also, I had a question: what happens to the article if it doesn't pass the VFH? Does it immediately go to the Votes For Deletion? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 13:30, May 5, 2013 (UTC)
- No no no. VFD is for really bad articles and VFH is for really good ones. As yet I've never had an article I wrote fail VFH although I did nominate BNP and that got hounded down because it was to cruel on racists (well more that the article was too political). If it does fail VFH it either can get Quasi-featured (not sure what that is. Ask Spike) or it simply carries on as a normal article.
- UnSignpost. Please do write an article for UnSignpost and send it to the press room. It has to be a humorous article about something that has happened in the World of Uncyclopedia in the past month (next issue probably June as busy period for me now). Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 16:45, May 5, 2013 (UTC)
- Are we done? Shall I notify the proofreader? Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 16:45, May 5, 2013 (UTC)
- Yes. So, what happened this month? Can I write about the featured articles? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 08:35, May 6, 2013 (UTC)
Sure, write about anything, just don't make it into an advertisement for yourself. All I know has happened so far this month is:
- I got scolded by Spike on my talk page. (As usual so not really news)
- User:Llwy-ar-lawr set up a new Welsh Uncyclopedia and had a row about Wikia.
- Noob of the Moment finally got touched after a month of inactivity. (Ok, that was self-promotion but still people need to vote for or against or make a comment not just leave it).
- If I may translate: He is saying, "Write about ScottPat"! Indeed, me scolding Scott is not news. The fact that Uncyclopedians learn the ropes is not news. You are free to make sport of me but be sure it is clearly different from the criticism leveled in seriousness; as when writing about races, nationalities, or other issues with strong viewpoints, keep it deliberately light.
- That an article is featured is not news; it's just what we do here. However, UnSignposts always have lists of links to click on, and your opinion that a given page is worth reading is useful.
- The Welsh business is dicy for treatment in the UnSignpost, as a user rage-quitting and blaming Wikia (falsely, I assert), and the re-airing of several old issues, is not funny business. It would certainly do to lead with a classic misinterpretation (including links to view the real news) that this website is about to be rewritten in Welsh and all Uncyclopedians will have to learn a second language.
- Scott, another criticism of the last UnSignpost: Voting on personalities on VFH is something we always fight and will never overcome. While it compliments me that two of my noms have a Reaganesque landslide of 5-to-0, the question of who is the nominator should never be a factor, and listing the nominator invites personality voting. 09:55 6-May-13
Sorry I presumed you wrote those articles as I was trying to credit the writer (didn't know who to credit for Zsa Zsa Gabor). And yes I admit that my last comment was self-promotion. I attempted to tie my hands behind my back when I saw it coming but my teeth still managed to operate the keyboard. Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 10:00, May 6, 2013 (UTC)
Spike, could you help me about my talk page, please: it has become a real mess and I don't know where to store all the information that I don't need write now? By the way, you have criticized all Scott's topics so I have nothing left to write about. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 10:04, May 6, 2013 (UTC)
- You have grasped my true function here. 10:33 6-May-13
I'm not Spike but I might be able to help:
UnSignpost articles can be about any news on the site. Check out village dump.
To clear your talk page: make a new page like User:Anton/Archive1 cut and paste everything here into it and then link it to this blank page. Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 10:26, May 6, 2013 (UTC)
- I did it for you this once. I like to leave recent topics on the main talk page in case there is more to say. 10:37 6-May-13
- ScottPat, please go to the chalkboard and write "hypocrisy" (with s) and "apologise" (with s or z) one thousand times. 10:51 6-May-13
- Sir, if hypocracy were a Form of Government, you would be King. 11:07 6-May-13
Thank you sir. I should make you a noble too. You can be head of my secret police. The Egoistic, Self-centered, Hypocritic state of ScottPat. Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 12:20, May 6, 2013 (UTC)
- And where should I put my UnSignpost article while it's being created, please? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 13:33, May 6, 2013 (UTC)
I would love to have your article by Wednesday and then I can create an UnSignpost for next weekend. I want to get UnSignpost back up to full speed from being monthly to weekly. Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 16:49, May 6, 2013 (UTC)
- Scott, returning UnSignpost to weekly is a fine goal for the long term (when Uncyclopedia gets as active as it used to be when the UnSignpost was weekly), but don't push it in the absence of news, because if there is no news, then the only content is to cajole users to do stuff they didn't come here to do; and don't pursue the goal if it risks making you feel you are working too hard on the site (leading to burn-out). 18:12 6-May-13
- Sorry, maybe it is a stupid question but I went to the press room and did not find the place where you put articles. Scott, in the press room you said to put any articles below, so I just write it directly under your comment? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 07:57, May 7, 2013 (UTC)
edit VFH Comment
HI Anton just to let you know that because of your comment on VFH just know and your comments on your talk page under one of the Ukraine sections I thought that I would remind you that VFH is where you vote for the best articles. If you think that the article is as good as it is going to get or good enough to be the best article of the day you vote for. It is not like pee review. Judging by your comments earlier you seem to think that if an article fails VFH it goes to VFD. It is not voting for articles to be excepted into mainspace.
I only say this as you wrote in your for vote on VFH that you think it requires a lot of improving and gets boring at the end. I am not here to make you change your vote and by all means keep it up if you think that your point still stands but please understand the concept of VFH. Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 13:53, May 6, 2013 (UTC)
- Ok. I just gave a lot of comments because I hope Al will improve the article but I voted for it because I still think it's more good than bad. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 14:00, May 6, 2013 (UTC)
If you think it is more good than bad but not the BEST then put a comment (abstain) and don't vote for or against. This is acceptable. Sorry to get at you Anton. Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 14:02, May 6, 2013 (UTC)
- The ancient Greeks, I was once told, had a fine and workable system under which any legislator who filed a bill that was not enacted was executed. But Scott states it correctly; failing to win VFH does not disparage the article or the author; it only means that users voted that it (in its present state) should not represent Uncyclopedia on the main page. Thus, vote for what exists; if it is not yet good enough, let's put something else on the main page, and that article can easily be renominated later. Sending an article to VFD solicits votes for its deletion, though it might also attract the interest of one or more rewrite artists; and VFD requires that the nominator look through the history for a preferable edition first. 14:28 6-May-13
edit Ukraine - The FINAL discussion (please book in advance limited spaces available)
The ULTIMATE question:
- Yes. I think it's finished. Also, is Llwy already gone from Uncyclopedia? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 16:14, May 6, 2013 (UTC)
- Isn't Llwy a girl? She said so on her user page. And what is the address of that Welsh one? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:58, May 6, 2013 (UTC)
- No, it is not that popular in Russia. I was just curious. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 07:46, May 7, 2013 (UTC)
Over here in England anyone who speaks Welsh will be frowned upon and called a "savage native" by passers-by. It is my dinner now (Spike's comment) so I'll be back in half-an-hour. Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 16:47, May 7, 2013 (UTC)
- We put our savages onto reservations where they are now drunk and eating government beans and cheese. You guys ought to try that. 16:56 7-May-13
We just shoot savages with that new invention: the machine gun. Work wonders with Kitchener's men in the Sudan, you know. (Yes Anton wordreference.com doesn't have a translation for Sudan or Kitchener as they are both names. Look them up on wiki to find out more about them). Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 17:11, May 7, 2013 (UTC)
- Considering that it is my second language, I think that I am not bad at all. (How modest!) Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 07:22, May 8, 2013 (UTC)
edit UnSignpost article
- I have finished writing it. Tell me if it is really bad and tell me if I put it in the wrong place. I am waiting for your comments and suggestions, please! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 08:51, May 7, 2013 (UTC)
- I have put it here. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 12:14, May 7, 2013 (UTC)
It is in the right place. Thank you for that Anton. Hopefully Ukraine will get proofread soon and then I think we shall go for VFH as I can't stop laughing when I read it sometimes and I already know the jokes because I wrote half of it. If it does get through VFH I am not sure what the rules count as for a feature. I think we will either both claim it as a feature or both claim half a feature. I'm sure Spike will give a proper answer to this. Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 16:27, May 7, 2013 (UTC)
- Respective honors are for you two to negotiate--the total in your counts should not exceed 1--but don't slice it finer than Halves. I did a little copy-editing but don't claim any credit in the Hall of Shame. 16:56 7-May-13
- They vandalised a lot of articles not just these. Probably just random. The only reason it seems was to show hatred for Spike which as I have explained is unjust and senseless. Don't worry though thanks to Spike, Simsie and Uninunium the vandal's work has been reverted. Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 08:02, May 8, 2013 (UTC)
- That's ok. You are a brilliant writer and I find all your work very funny. Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 08:38, May 8, 2013 (UTC)
- No, no, no. You wrote half the Ukraine article, you gave me great ideas for bits I wrote and we both helped each other out. It was your article as much as mine. Thank you for your help. I always said that your Normandy article was good especially for a first article. The Probability Theory article is just my type of humour. I think we share similar humour interests which helps. We should do another collaboration. Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 08:54, May 8, 2013 (UTC)
Well, thanks a lot. I am actually planning to write another article myself (maybe some How To, maybe Brittany, as Spike said that Uncyclopedia needed a good one). After that I want to work with you again. Actually, I wanted to ask you, what if the article is already featured but it's really bad and should be rewrited? Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 17:33, May 8, 2013 (UTC)
- Re-write, please. Whether it was featured or not was an opinion made at the time. Some featured articles are out-of-date, meme ridden or were voted for as a joke. Anything can be improved. Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 18:01, May 8, 2013 (UTC)
Ok, then I have a lot of ideas! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 18:03, May 8, 2013 (UTC) Thank you for reviewing Normandy! I will edit it and I hope it will be good enough for VFH! Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 18:05, May 8, 2013 (UTC)
- Good luck!Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 18:10, May 8, 2013 (UTC)
- Hello! And yes, feature articles can be improved or touched up, but not, imnho, very much and not to just add more or extend them (unless you are the principal author). At least that's how I'd put it, in that our features are "Features" and stand around like statues most of the time. There is one here that some people really wanted to change but or course the established users won't let them. It was featured, and should be left as it was written, and I think it's a classic. imnho, please don't overly edit features unless the idea for the edit is so good you can't stop laughing. Thanks. Aleister 18:10 8-5-'13
- More on Brittany below. 00:31 13-May-13
edit Pee Review
I don't want to be a nuisance but could you possibly review one or two of my other articles on pee review. Perhaps "Emu War" and/or "Last King of Scotland." That would be great if you could. Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 18:33, May 8, 2013 (UTC)
- Scott, sure. That's what I want to do but, you see, I am also rather active in my real life (returning to our previous conversation) and now I barely have the time to answer you on my talk page. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 18:35, May 8, 2013 (UTC)
- Well, I actually have time but I just wanted to post a big answer to Llwy on the Forum. My (and also your) achievement (to bring her back) of which I am proud can reveal itself useless, if she goes away now. Anton (talk) Uncyclopedia United 19:18, May 8, 2013 (UTC)
We need to add links to the article. I've done the first two paragraphs. Could you please add some links to as many paragraphs as you can. Thanks. Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 08:25, May 9, 2013 (UTC)
Not really as on Uncyclopedia we generally tend to have too few links compared to wiki. The introduction to the wiki Ukraine article has a link for every word. Thanks for your comment though. Sir ScottPat (talk) VFH UnS NotM WotM WotY 17:04, May 9, 2013 (UTC)
edit Scott's question as to why every single comment now requires a header
edit This UnSignpost may be unsuitable for some viewers!