User talk:Ander

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Hello, Ander, and a very good afternoon/morning/evening to you. Thank you for deciding to sign up to Uncyclopedia and I hope you wish to stay. If not, all you have to do is chew through your own fingers and retrieve the key from your eye to escape. Before doing anything though, may I suggest you read the following links?

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button (Button sig) above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.

At Uncyclopedia, writing articles is not a requirement, but it certainly is a fun and easy way to express your creativity. To write an article, it's recommended that you start it in your userspace (for example, User:Ander/Article about stuff) so you can edit it at your leisure. If you decide to create it in the cold world of mainspace, make sure it is in accordance with the policies laid out above, and if you're not done put the "Work-In-Progress" template - {{construction}} - onto it as well. A good idea before doing any writing for here would be to read (thurougly) HTBFANJS.

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Dump, or ask an administrator on their talk page. Additionally, the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply put {{adoptme}} on your Userpage to join. Again, welcome! 


Now that's all the official stuff out the way why not also visit some of these other useful links:

  • Pee Review -- should you decide to write something it may be an idea to put it up for review. Reviews are a requirement of you wish to self-nominate an article for highlight but also is a good way of gauging how good your writing is and how you can improve it (if need be). Also if you choose to do a review for someone else at the same time be sure to read the Pee Review Guidlines.
  • Userboxes are a fun way of decorating your user page and conveying information about yourself (like if your a girl or gay or whatever) but are by no means necessary, and you are not obliged to tell us anything about you if you don't want to. In fact a user page isn't necessary but they can be fun, look at other people's user pages for ideas.
  • Also there are a few cults around here and user space pages that you can join in with that are good for making connections with people (But again aren't obligatory).

Do seriously visit my talk page if you have any additional questions or even if you'd just like to say "hi", I don't bite, honest.
SK Sir Orian57Talk Gay flag RotM 23:08 20 July 2008

Join The CMC! Make Your Inner Cow Happy!

Moo, Ander!

What is it about cows that gets us all hot and bothered? Where do cows come from? What are cows?

These are the questions that drive the Cow Moo Cult and its brethren, who are very, VERY interested in cows and cow by-products.

The CMC is devoted not only to cows, but to helping Uncyclopedia through general acts of goodness and through motivating people with cow-treats and the like.

So, Ander, why not join the CMC? It's free (unless you count virginity as money) and it's fun (and it's full of clichés)! You'll get a pretty template for your userpage and a nice title for your signature! What could be better? Sign Up Now!
Double moos from your cowy friend,

edit Talk pages

You must never mess with someone elses messages on talk pages. Ever. Always sign your own post with four tidles but never add to someone elses post (save for spelling errors and typos but even then only if it's too annoying). This is just a friendly warning, it doesn't sound like it maybe but if you carry on with that it may lead to you getting banned.

Ok NEVER revert a reverted edit. I think you may possibly have been the one to have posted the message originally (as the IP) but if you want to add to it start a new message and explain that the above was you. I'll undo your edit again and replace your suggested corrections (which are apreciated). And reply to me here I have your page watched ok? Like I said I'm trying to be friendly here. SK Sir Orian57Talk Gay flag RotM 23:23 20 July 2008

edit Accountant

Welcome back after a long time! Unfortunately, this article is a Featured Article that ran on our main page, and is presumed not to need more help being funny, which your edits weren't. Your edits on Versailles are better than what was there before ("It is stated that all..."), but just as gassy in places ("as well as slightly larger, but not by much"). It is risky making fun of an encyclopedia by deliberately writing badly, such as when the "encyclopedia writer" wrestles with himself; as the result is simply bad writing, which anyone can do. It's better to deliberately pursue a comedy strategy. Spıke Ѧ 03:06 3-Jul-14

PS--Your edit to the UnNews is a definite step forward. Your follow-on edits to Versailles use long, long lists and self-reference, two techniques that have been overused here, and which we advise against at How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid, which you might browse through. Cheers! Spıke Ѧ 03:09 3-Jul-14

edit Certainly You're Not Serious

Certainly you're not serious. Also, am I allowed to remove the negative stuff here? It's bumming me out, which I think is counterproductive. No doubt your unwarranted criticism is merely an example of the inevitable Pain Behind the Comedy, and while I'm entirely sympathetic re your childhood-based control issues, I do have butter tarts to attend to. The preceding unsigned comment was added by Ander (talk • contribs)

Indeed you are not allowed to remove other people's posts to your talk page, if that is what you mean. Thank you for the psychoanalysis, but I am trying to help you write funny stuff, and certainly not to control you, and if you bristle at that, you may have maturity issues of your own. Spıke Ѧ 03:31 3-Jul-14
Sigh. I never expected this to be even more anal and judgmental than WP—but hey, irony, right? I do understand about maturity being so important here, though. – Ander (talk) 03:34, July 3, 2014 (UTC)
BTW, SPIKE, I couldn't help noticing how quickly you responded to my little post here. I'm not saying it was creepy, but could it be a sign that you may need to, you know, get out a bit more?  :?D
Popularity theories aside, how about focusing your laser-like critical eye on the 20–30% of UC "contributors" who—and believe me, I needn't be the least bit subjective here—wouldn't know Funny if it hit them over the head with a week-old 6-foot Subway Party Sandwich, rather than those of us with gen-u-wine professional writing/editing experience who, with no expectation of recompense, and also due to the bad timing of drinking coffee then having nothing else to do, grace these twisted pages with our sparkling wit to the delight of the huddled, humor-starved masses &etc.? I'm just thinking in terms of sheer efficiency and the best use of your obviously limited, valuable time. – Ander (talk) 04:08, July 3, 2014 (UTC)
Featured articles receive special protection unless it is to remove an undeliberate typo or update it if something has happened since to the subject (i.e. death and taxes). If you want to replace an existing article with something you think is better, create it on your own user space and ask others to vote in favour or not. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 07:59, July 3, 2014 (UTC)
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