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I notice you're on a bit of a whoring spree there. Did you notice I deleted your nomination of your article? You can't self nom without a pee review. A valid one. From someone else. I recommend you go get one of those first, then see what happens. Good luck! --UU - natter 13:28, Aug 20
- A further tip: when most people reply to you, they do so on the same page you posted the comment/question/whatever. So I replied on my talkpage, and Ape replied on his, just above where you posted your second question. So use the handy "watch" tab when you post on talk pages, and keep an eye on your watchlist. You can always unwatch when you have your reply. --UU - natter 13:50, Aug 20
Alright, I looked over the article. While I enjoy the Beiber bashing, it is very juvenile and unstructured. You seem to have a sufficient grasp on proper grammatical use, so I know you can write a good article. However, what I have learned in my young career here is that you have to be organized to be truly funny. Sure you may merit a cheap laugh from jokes about Beiber's ties with pedophilia, but I am sure you want something better.
Now you asked for suggestions, so I shall try to provide some sage guidance without babying you through the writing process. I am going to create a new article for you, seeing as your current title seems odd. The title of the new one will be "Why?:You do not want to be Justin Beiber. "Why" articles are a great amount of fun to write (for they do not require as much detail, but instead a coherent argument). So essentially, the goal of this article will be to convince the reader why he or she would not want to be Justin Beiber.
So to give you a start with how to organize it, here's an example (but only a skeleton).
- Introduction: this section is your chance to hook the reader. Make an interesting appeal here, such as, "Imagine your friends leaving you lest that your shrill, pre-pubescent voice rupture their eardrums. Imagine your mother being ashamed that she ever brought you into this world. Imagine God forsaking you for your deliberate musical attempt to stunt the progression of mankind. These scenarios reflect the meaningless existence that Justin Beiber leads."
- You do not want his voice- I know this, you know this: nobody in their right mind can stand to listen to his singing. He is a talentless hack when it comes to actual vocal technique, and you can really blast him for that here. For instance, "If ever you wish to pursue a career in the vocal arts, then you had best take back any desires to become another Justin Beiber. I think you can seem where I am coming from.
- You do not want his body- This section could be really fun, seeing as so many sheepish girls find him to be attractive. You could definitely discount these opinions here and point out that he looks like a bitch. Samuel L. Jackson could help you out on this one (see Pulp Fiction if you don't get the reference; it's a fantastic movie).
- You do not want his mind- Slightly along the lines of his lacking talent, he is also an imbecile. Watch some of his interviews and you will see why I have formed such an opinion. Also, his lyrics could come into play here (if he actually writes them, which I have my doubts about).
- Common reasons why one would want to be Justin Bieber- Now it is time to include the other side of the argument. You'll need to think up some humorous reasons here. Start off reasonably, with reasons such as "wanting a gaggle of girls following his every movement," his money, and his fame. However, you will want to become increasingly ludicrous as you proceed down the list. For instance, you can add in a "to lose 40 years and sleep with a 15 year old." Such a joke will break from the norm that you have established, and therefore be quite funny.
- In fact, even God hates him- Lastly, we end with one of the most extreme possibilities for a conclusion: he sucks so much that even God has forsaken him. If you can make some creative changes to Bible verses, this part could be awesome.
So there you have it, you're welcome to start up the article when you're ready. I'm just going to put in a starting bit for now; very likely what I came up with for the introduction. Let me know if this advice helps!
S3ahawk 16:50, August 21, 2010 (UTC)
haha you suck
its official, with your permaban and all!! -- 04:39, Aug 22