n the beginning there was nothing, and from that nothing arose Uncyclopedia, a great and magnificent tome containing all that was good. And once opened, Uncyclopedia spawned all that was funny and great. From the pages of Uncyclopedia sprang forth the knowledge of how to huff a cat, the knowledge of the meaning of the acronym "NRA", and the knowledge of how to beat a joke to death. From Uncyclopedia sprung Oscar Wilde quotes, beautiful pictures, and an annoying copycat named Wikipedia. However, right from the beginning, there was foretold an end. On the last page of Uncyclopedia, there is a small note. The note reads as follows:
Uncyclopedia will not last forever. Eventually there will come the Unpocalypse: A fiery rain of Hebrews will fall
from the sky, followed by forty days and nights of fog. Once the fog is lifted, Uncyclopedia will be no more.
However, dearest Reader, take solace in the fact that you will have due warning. There will be 5 signs that the
Unpocalypse is coming. The signs are as follows:(continued...)
1987 - Well, now that I've finally done it, I might as well post it on the internet.
1999 - Hey, this link doesn't look too bad. Let's see where it... OH MY GOD!
2000 - One year free of that horrid image. Hey, my friend told me to go to a site. This couldn't possibly be bad... JESUS CHRIST! COME ON!
2001 - Another link, I'm not falling for that one. But www.kittens.com, how could it be... WHY GOD WHY?!
2002 - No more links. I swear - but hey, a movie file... GOOD LORD! THEY ANIMATED IT!
2003 - It has been one year since I've gone blind, so I can now safely click on links to view webpages... "Listen to this article"?... OH COME ON! THAT IS DISTURBING.
2004 - Now that I've gone deaf, all is well. Oh what is this, an image to braille converter? Hmm, I'll take a random image off my hard drive, convert... now lets see what it feels like... Aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrgghh!
20X6 - Some future archeologist will uncover a server. Once getting it to work and viewing the lone image on it, he shall be forever disgusted believing our society a fan of people doing such things. He may also find the fossilized remains of Wikipedia after Oscar Wilde has eaten its brain.
2007 Serial pest who goes by the name of "Tonigol" is arrested in Sydney for "Masturbating furiously" at the Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras.
Once again, dear chaps, the Devil wins this award. 13th month in a row. He's that good, you say. Well I say, chaps, that just because he runs this website doesn't mean you blokes have to keep voting for him! He's already got 13 bloody GUNs! Stop voting for ------------ *scream from off stage*. Announcers body is seen hanged from a tree
The Devil, it seems, has done it again. Yet anouther award for him to hang above his desk, eh? I think he'll soon run out of space if he keeps up like this! He's already got 12 of these. Not that he doesn't deserve them and all. No no no deary, after seeing what happened to the last guy, I'd never say something like that. But really folks, have any of you even read the rules? He can only win once. It says it plane and clear. Well I say we fight it brothers! I say we kill The Beast! I say we Announcer slumps forward in his chair. He has a large sword stuck in his back.