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Latest revision as of 13:22, June 21, 2010

Jesus on raptor
Welcome to UnNews Religion Section.

Spirituality in the news.


UnNews takes a dim view of religion, especially those which practice old time rituals like "Hyenamancy". That being said, spirituality is an bottomless well of humor. George W. Bush, the Pope and Westboro Baptist Church get their fair share of ribbing here. Not to be too discriminating, we extend our wit to all faiths and cults, whackos and nutjobs, the saintly and the blasphemous. Your cross to bear, dear reader, is the occasional fact sprinkled among this journalistic gem store, and for this, we apologize.

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Religion in UnNews

Pope praises Jamie Lynn Spears for not using birth control
Pope-phaseolus-XIX

VATICAN CITY, Prussia -- In a stirring sermon given yesterday afternoon, Pope Benedict XVI praised Jamie Lynn Spears, Britney Spears's sixteen-year old sister who is now pregnant, for upholding her moral standards and refusing to use Birth control when she had sex with her 104 year-old boyfriend, Pugsly Addams. more...


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Religion News Quote of the Moment

...those nasty whores with their whore legs, whore skin and whore bulges. Whores!

~ Rabbi Yosef Elyashiv on women
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Selected UnNews Religion Image

Bush-Jesus
God will speak to mankind through George W. Bush once more, as he did once through the burning thornbush. That's the only way to set things right in the Middle East for good. You might think that this idea should have struck the old guy somewhat earlier.

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Religion in UnNews

Noah's ark to sail again
Nark

SOMEWHERE IN THE ROCKY MOUNTAINS - French excentric and self-described “creationist” Johan Huibers spent the last twenty-two years of his life building an exact replica of Noah’s ark, which he plans to set adrift in the Mediterranean Sea in July, 2007, to test the story of the Biblical ship’s maiden voyage during the flood that God is said to have sent upon the earth (or, at least, the Middle East) some 4,000 years ago, to destroy “all flesh” (or, at least, all Middle Easterners). more...


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Religion in UnNews

Dude with Bob Marley sticker ignorant of Marley's beliefs
Jesus allpurpose

NO. CONWAY, New Hampshire -- With the death of screaming insane super-salesman Billy Mays yesterday (see UnNews:Billy Mays' Head Explodes), Jesus made a hostile bid for the Oxiclean Corporation this morning for 17 trillion dollars and free passes to Heaven for existing employees. Industry analysts are saying this may be the boost that will get Jesus back into the mainstream of America. more...



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