User:Zim ulator/UnNews Religion Section model

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Latest revision as of 13:22, June 21, 2010

Jesus on raptor
Welcome to UnNews Religion Section.

Spirituality in the news.

UnNews takes a dim view of religion, especially those which practice old time rituals like "Hyenamancy". That being said, spirituality is an bottomless well of humor. George W. Bush, the Pope and Westboro Baptist Church get their fair share of ribbing here. Not to be too discriminating, we extend our wit to all faiths and cults, whackos and nutjobs, the saintly and the blasphemous. Your cross to bear, dear reader, is the occasional fact sprinkled among this journalistic gem store, and for this, we apologize.


Religion in UnNews

Heavens rejoice as Dow surpasses 14,000

NEW YORK, New York -- Praise be thee, New York Stock Exchange, as your Holy Dow Jones Industrial Average surpasseth the 14,000 mark, raising its glory to God, Almighty, and bringing to all of Earth peace and happiness unbounded! Verily, as thy average hath risen, much as the Son of Man, Jesus Christ, from his death, so has abundance and prosperity in the land increased 14 thousand-fold. more...


Religion News Quote of the Moment

Homos are fags!

~ Reverend Obvious on Indonesia

Selected UnNews Religion Image


Pope Phaseolus XIX upon hearing that Jamie Lynn Spears is pregnant. "Birth control is evil, of course."

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Religion in UnNews

Obama bows to Saudi king, triggers fall of Western Civilisation
Obama bow down

KING FAHD MEMORIAL PALACE, Saudi Arabia -- In a surprise move, president Barack Obama ceded all ultimate authority over the United States to the Arabian-Islamic cabal. Although words to this effect were not spoken, by bowing to the King of Saudi Arabia, Obama was sending a secret Muslim signal that our precious American way of life is over. more...


Religion in UnNews

Respected theologians call for return to wife beating
Beat wife

DEEP SOUTH, America -- Pastor Rick Warren, founder of Saddleback Church, a controversial Christian Fundamentalist Ministry that uses mind control and hyena blazing to keep converts in line, has been paraphrased as sort of saying, "Abused, "Miserable" Women Have "No Right" to Divorce". This ridiculous claim has been made by left-wing, artsy homosexuals who don't realize they're going to Hell. more...

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