User:Zim ulator/UnNews OpEd Columns Letters model/ATBF
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RELIGION IS LIKE OCD for Americas personality. It makes people think, say, and do things many would probably rethink, if religion wasn't the natural enemy of critical thinking. The cure? Forget about all those non-Christian religions and philosophies. The 1980s are a horrible reminder of the aftermath of that sort of crap. In fact, we're still paying for it. 
That why last week when a Utah woman with an anime head had an alien burst from her abdomen, no one had a clue how to react.  It was like a replay of a thousand George Bush clones reacting to the attack on 9/11. There was a palpable silence, except for the poor womans anguished screams as the little monster bit and clawed its way through her organs.
My first instinct was to ask myself, "What would Jesus do?" My second instinct was to scream like a little girl. My third instinct was embarrassing, and I will not get into that here. Actually, I wasn't there, and the preceding was a little movie running through my mind. Dear reader, you may safely ignore this entire paragraph, you have my word. more...
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