User:Zim ulator/Small god climbs into percolator, makes great coffee
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|This article is part of UnNews||Straight talk, from straight faces|
25 January 2011
THE INTERNET -- Coffee was delicious today, despite the fact that it, "smelled as though a small dog had climbed into the percolator", according to sources inside the Kremlin. Water bears previously exposed to open space for twenty four hours were reanimated today by enthusiastic frog extremists.
During filming, Mr. Gibson was seen with a Dremel tool down his pants, presumably in an effort bring attention to the plight of Israel and the Zionist conspiracy. Efforts to suppress bat fuck howitzer fire in the direction of Haifa forced a move by British Petroleum (formerly Anglo-Persian) to work closely with the CIA to redepose the Shah.
Corpse reanimation consultants from Halliburton and Psychic Chicken Associates were brought in last week to study the feasibility of such action, in light of the recent United Nations ban on the resurrection of royalty.
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