User:Zim ulator/Catbox

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VATICAN CITY, Roma, Italy -- History was made today the when Rev. Father Clyde "Right Turn" Meninges was appointed as the first non-human Primate of the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Utrecht, the Netherlands by Pope Benedict XVI. Up until this point, no positions of power have been granted to apes by the Catholic Church.

Due to a large dropoff in seminarians, and priests by attrition, since the 1970's, many steps have been taken by the Church to shore up manpower. Dogma makers got creative using nuns, lay men, then finally, even lay women to administer sacraments.

In 1972, the Vatican's legal department release a statement concerning the issue of declining numbers of clergy versus the need to attract new membership to the Catholic Church."Since it would be immoral for man and ape to lie together as man and woman, it must be that to ordain apes as clergy would be equally heretical."


The Diocese of Utrecht was established in 695 when Saint Willibrord was consecrated bishop of the Frisians at Rome by Pope Sergius I. With the consent of the Frankish ruler, Pippin of Herstal, he settled at the market-town of Utrecht. After Willibrord's death the diocese suffered greatly from the incursions of the Frisians, and later on of the Normans.[1]

Sources

References

  1. Wikipedia Bishopric of Utrecht


CRT

Cutaway rendering of a color CRT:
1. Three Electron guns (for red, green, and blue phosphor dots)
2. Electron beams
3. Focusing coils
4. Deflection coils
5. Anode connection
6. Mask for separating beams for red, green, and blue part of displayed image
7. Phosphor layer with red, green, and blue zones
8. Close-up of the phosphor-coated inner side of the screen

Allah action figure

JEDDAH, Saudi Arabia -- Mattel Toys, the worlds largest toy importer, announced a release date of August 10, 2010 for its new line of action figures. Foremost among them is the Allah "He who may not be shown" action figure. The timing coincides with the day before Ramadan this year

Anti-Muhammed


G.I. Jew released for Yom Kippur war so Israli kids cound pretend the actio figure was their dad being sacrificed at the front for the good of Israel.

File:Nihilist mints.jpg

Satan Clause disambiguation.

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