From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
The pen tip hit the page with a thud. The sound wave revibrated threw the words, distorting them with every wave more and more. Being able to edit how everyone was to know history was a great thrill for Jonathan. The last living entity left on Pluto Jonathon considered his power a rival to the legend of gods or at least the next best thing. Then again a slice of cheese was said to be able to predict the entire future of a cosmos, if only it new the phrase “I think therefore I am” . Thus the cheese was never am or it or whatever. Anyway the pen was just a bad metaphor and unfortunately knowing everything meant knowing the truth and blala bla la if only he could of started his story better .But at least it was better then,” Jonathon the half carrot / half chicken god of his solar system.Lord of Pluto which had been transformed into a sort of Space Disney land where all the evil corporate soles had been sent after they lost the battel to control the world.\ to a half carrot half chicken. O how ironic it was that he was created by these people to help them to only turn on them.O how His carrot mother and chicken father would be proud if they where here today. But unfortunately his mother choked his father and she was sentence to a firing squad. Loneliness was a new thing for Jonathan seeing he was so popular on mars . He had been the captain of the school football team and he had fucked all the cheerleaders. A straight A student Jonathon had even fucked the principle. But now there was no one left to fuck. Everyone was dead, in fact everything was dead. Not a living thing was left in the galaxy. The sun was now the size of half the entire universes and the apocalypse was Nye . Jonathan felt bad for setting in place the current event but was a positive thinker and imagined the universe may just be better off. Then again he was a realist and new it was all shit anyway. Although Jonathan was starting to smell tasty … like soup maybe Dipped in hot chocolate deep-fried and smothers in honey ……………….. oooo sprinkles. This was history at its tastiest and most smelly nice or something. With a flash the heat engulfed jonathans body and he let out a giggle. The sun thought this to quit a queer thing indeed and decided to put every back as it was in the year 2004.