User:Uncyclopedian/UnScripts:The Young and the Uncyclopedians/57
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edit Episode #57: The n00b
(Episode starts at the bar.)
Engelsfair: Let's go! Now, can everyone lower the rifles?
Adam: Actually, the safe is only accessible by communists. Darn.
Han: Ectis Birada Nikto. See? It's open now.
Adam: We are not even near the safe we are looking for. It is in the Baron's mansion. That was the code for the bar safe.
Dizberg: Plus, you still wouldn't get to it. Only commies could.
Han: Fuck you Dizberg. Also, the safe has a key to another transport plane.
Adam: Ooh, look! A killer froggy!
Emmzed: The Canadian Superweapon Planes are better.
Han: Do they have huge weapons?
Emmzed: They have The Hell Outta Here.
Han: Yay! And Private Froggy, you guard us.
Han: Engelsfair, you go get eaten by a grue.
Engelsfair: I do not listen to capitalist generals!
Han: Yes, you do.
(Engelsfair examines the Grue in the corner of the room)
Engelsfair: A Communist Grue! It would never eat me!
Han: Oh, come on. At least we now have security.
Benson: BENSON IS BETTER THAN YOU!
Bartender: Stop yelling.
Han: Let us settle this with a duel.
(Han shoots first in the duel, badly wounding Dizberg)
Han: Pancakes it is.
Engelsfair: I'll save you with Communism.
(Dizberg is saved BY COMMUNISM)
Indy: I SAY WE EAT CONTENTS!
Everyone except Indy: Oh god, NO.
Benson: WE SHOULD EAT BENSON'S FAVORITE FOOD, FOR BENSON IS BETTER THAN YOU!
Indy: CONTENTS CONTENTS CONTENTS!!!
(Rifles are aimed at Indy)
(Han, Adam, Dizberg, and Benson shoot Indy. Dr. Supwealuhop wakes up, then sprinkles curry powder over Indy's wound. He is instantly healed)
Han:Okay, how the hell does curry powder heal wounds?
Supwealuhop: That's an ancient Hindu secret!
Adam: Now, Indy, I must tell you that Contents sucks.
Indy: No, you suck.
Benson: REAL MEN YELL! BENSON MUST EAT! BENSON WANTS BENSON'S FAVORITE FOOD!
Han: The only food we have... are Donut and Pancake rations from the plane.
Priest: God says we should eat angel cakes and God Donuts.
Indy: Shut the fuck up about the donuts! Let's eat CONTENTS!
Nikita: Let's just eat already. Plus, this is a bar.
n00b: 1337 d0nut5!
Zatoichi: Who let the n00b in?
Shandion: I did. Unfortunately, I must reveal now that I had an affair with Miss n00b.
Emmzed: Nobody cares. Only significant relationships are shocking.
n00b: Now, I must reveal that I cheated on Shandion. I had an affair with Indy.
(Everyone gasps. n00b leaves, and a tree falls on her. Engelsfair goes out.)
Engelsfair: I will save you only if you become a Communist.
n00b: Ok...ok...I will become a communist.
(Engelsfair saves n00b. The n00b gets up, only to be eaten by a Grue.)
Han: There you were!