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“What a wonderfully perfect idea you have stirring up in your mind. However, in addition to our socialisitic crusade, we should remember to claim our territory in the genius who inspiered us to do so in the first plce. Our beloved king, saviour, and all around ruler of the free (and unfree) world, Oscar Wilde.”
| Member of the Order of Uncyclopedia|
This person has successfully registered on Uncyclopedia. They
should be proud of themselves for making such a smart move.
Member of the Order
|This user is a toilet! In Soviet Russia, toilet urinates on YOU!!|
| This user has found Jesus and is therefore a potential threat to society.|
|This user is fae Bonnie Scotland|
| This user is a total UKer|
...jolly good, wot?!
|This user loves|
|ao-E||This user only speaks AOLer because it was a required course in school.|
|bs-3||This user is able to contribute with an advanced level of Bullsh!t.|
|cpp-2||This user is able to contribute with an intermediate level of C++.|
|fig-N||This user is a native speaker of Fight.|
|gb-4||This user speaks Gibberish at a near-native level.|
|mor-1||This user is able to contribute with a basic level of -- --- .-. ... . / -.-. --- -.. ..|
|Pie-4||This user speaks Pie at a near-native level.|
|rh-N||This user is a native speaker of Random Humour.|
|IP||This person's IP is 6.6.6.|
|ru-4||This user speaks Русский at a near-native level.|
|bu-E||This user killed 13 of his classmates in school speaking Bullet.|
|sa-4||This user speaks Sarcasm at a near-native level.|
|typo-4||Htis user sepaks Typo at a naer0native levle.|
|This user idolises Dr. House
and knows it's not Lupus.
|Formerly lost among the dregs of society, this User has defected and crossed over from the dark side. Welcome to the machine....|
|This user is €uro|
...and denies their "real" citizenship
(List of European Uncyclopedians )
|bu-N||This user is a native speaker of Bullet and can fire high-caliber rounds in full-automatic mode.|
|MS-N||This user grew up in a forward-thinking family, and therefore always speaks his mind, you nerd.|
|BK||THIS USER IS A BLACK KNIGHT!!|
| This user enjoys staring at spinning objects.
They may be afflicted with Attention Deficit look at the birdie!.|
| This user, Tristmaster, is a genuine Puppet Master.|
This person has done (assumedly) bad things to Uncyclopedia
under 3 - 3000 pseudonyms, as referenced here.
|ABYSS x?,???||This user IS The Abyss.|
| This user is a |
& is working on their
Lenin mustache! ☭
Number of people who tristmaster has owned and pwned at the same time at super smash bros. since you started reading this article.:
|This article force pushes infants. |
You can help by bolting it to the floor.
|AA!||AAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAA AAAAAAA AAAAAAA!!!|
|17-4||This user speaks 1337 at a near-native level.|
|This user is a New Yorker|
... The Mets... I mean the Yankees
... suck... I think???
(Uncyclopedians from the greatest city ever!)
this article is about me. me me me me me me me me mem mem emem memem emme memem mem ememmmmmemememememememememmemem,emeeemrmemememememememmemeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. ummm, yea anyway the point is. your gonna die soon. do you know why? its becouse your reading this article and saying candyman. your not? well then your very lucky, mostly becouse you'll live another 5 seconds. point is, your gonna die mostly becouse i kno where you live, and i know how to give directions to chuck norris. so he can kick your ass using a roundhouse kick.
(speaking in 3rd person) tristmaster was born in a tropical paridise with many others. although unlike the many others, he didnt laugh at mexicans. he grew up to get accounts on many other sites, such as roblox, deviantart, urban rivals, and uncyclopedia. and thats it.
- your mom
- something other than you
- not getting his article huffed
- ultimite jesus
- master hand
- crazy hand
- .......i got it
- he likes PIE!!!!!!!!!
- and ice cream
- and of course brownies
- play the game
- or ill kill you
- c'mon hop to it
- or ill get michael jackson to see you
- if your over 12
- ill get your future cellmate
- his name is bubba
- I bet you two will have lots of fun
- your sister
- anything about sexual harrasment
- educational programing
- many many other things
- and more....
- including the grue
- water grues
- shadow grues
- russian frues
- other grues
- you again
- ..........prepare to die
edit what else?
acording to the diagnostic the patiant suffers from severe personality and social issues. fantisizes about killing anyone or anything that acts on his dislikes. and goes against his intrests.
edit The Country
“In Soviet Russia, tristmasterland is dictated by YOU!!”
Well the country is very intresting, you see. it involves Nazism,Kommunism,facism, imperialism,and ownageism. while this creates some instability, at least he shoots all capitalists. the population is so far about 5,000 due to misbehavior. although it's a well known fact that if you worship tristmaster, you will be forgiven 1 mortal sin, as well as 3 regular sins. best of all in tristmasterland, free biscuit fridays at popeye's chicken and biscuits has been moved tooooooooooo....................all week long. a move very popular with claveman. of course things such as mcdonalds, burgerking, wendy's, and arby's, are also prominant. so remember, obay and eat the food, and you live.EXTRA: now, with this special offer, get a house in Tristmasterland for 100,000,000,000,000,000,000$ cheaper. a house is now 100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000$. this special offer is only avaiable for the next 300 years,so call now, remember, in 300 years, duke nukem forever might finally come out(although most likely not) come out, so we have a reason to close the offer in celebration, or sadness. call now at 1-800-666-IPWNU, or log in at www.Tristmasterlandenslavement.com. WAIT, theres more, get a house now and we will give you on FREE copy of ZORK. thats right, a FREE copy of Zork. NO, not Zork 2, Zork 3, Or Zork 4. But the ORIGANAL Zork.(ordering Zork requires 19.99$ to pay for keeping the game on your computer, as well as tax, which is another 20.00$)SO ORDER NOW. GET A FREE CAR AS WELL. Tristmastermobiles are being made to keep the people moving around. as long as you don't press any buttons, you should be fine, or at least not dead. while your at it, get a FREE tristmasternought, the greatest battleship, err motorboat, to sail the seven seas.AND NOW, get a FREE Tristmasterjet. which can fly at 42,000,000,000,000,000,000 MPH.(be warned the jet has no brakes).
|National Motto: "Obay Grues or we shoot you."|
| Dictator ||Tristmaster(WHO THE FUCK DID YOU THINK IT WAS, HUH, SNAPPLE? I THINK NOT!)|
|Independence||set since the begining of time. ha just joking i control everyone through mind control|
|Currency||super smash bros. coins|
|National Anthem||"Obay the great Tristmaster"|
|National Holiday||Tristmaster day, Oscar Wilde day.|
|National Slogan||I OWN YOUR ASS|
edit MY NINJASTARS AND AWARDS
no, i did not steal them. if they look like there stolen its becouse i'm a humerous person. and i try to change the text around a little bit for laughs.