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“What a wonderfully perfect idea you have stirring up in your mind. However, in addition to our socialisitic crusade, we should remember to claim our territory in the genius who inspiered us to do so in the first plce. Our beloved king, saviour, and all around ruler of the free (and unfree) world, Oscar Wilde.”
~ Snapple
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WARNING!
"Tristmaster" is considered to be a sacred word by the followers of the Leet faith. In order to prevent random numbers being placed all over the place, please do not speak it in front of them.
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Stupid camper.
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.sdrawkcab si resu sihT
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This userbox is for people who know, if you wonder what they know, then you probably don't know.
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Don't make a move. I'm watching you.
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This user be getting drunk on the beer volcano.
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In Latin they would be dexter.
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Ubx-
Crapload
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This user idolises Dr. House
but since Everybody Lies, you can't be sure how much.
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Death to America!
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Heil Hitler!
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This user is an
Assault Soldier and
is pWn1ng n00bs with his
quarter gun.
Number of people who tristmaster has owned and pwned at the same time at super smash bros. since you started reading this article.:
| ∞
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| RS
| This user plays RunEscape. Laugh at Pray for them.
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| This user played the Xbox 360 till it got the RRoD, now plays a PS3 has lost his social life completely and thinks cod is a FPS not a fish NOTE:His PSNid is K*********s7* (HA try to work that one out!)
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This page is not appropriate for our more sensitive viewers. It may contain naughty, filthy things like breasts, boobies, tits, knockers or funbags. Nasty words like cock, fuck, capitalism, & Barbra Streisand may also appear in the text. Viewing by persons under the age of 18 is not recommended, no matter how much they want to see a page filled with cursing. That means you, <insert name here>. Yes, we know who you are & Jesus is watching you!
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| DANGER
Grues Beyond this point. Please do not proceed unless you know how to stop a grue, or you want to be eaten.
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this article is about me. me me me me me me me me mem mem emem memem emme memem mem ememmmmmemememememememememmemem,emeeemrmemememememememmemeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. ummm, yea anyway the point is. your gonna die soon. do you know why? its becouse your reading this article and saying candyman. your not? well then your very lucky, mostly becouse you'll live another 5 seconds. point is, your gonna die mostly becouse i kno where you live, and i know how to give directions to chuck norris. so he can kick your ass using a roundhouse kick.
[edit] biography
(speaking in 3rd person) tristmaster was born in a tropical paridise with many others. although unlike the many others, he didnt laugh at mexicans. he grew up to get accounts on many other sites, such as roblox, deviantart, urban rivals, and uncyclopedia. and thats it.
For all those who actually belive someone has killed me. THIS is what really happened. more realisticly, it's a futile attempt to beat me in SSB. and many other online things, as well as real life.
you will see this sign on the way to my domicile.
This is your fate when you get near me in SSB.
[edit] intrests
- death
- your mom
- something other than you
- uncyclopedia
- not getting his article huffed
- god
- ultimite jesus
- master hand
- crazy hand
- umm
- err
- yea.......
- ......................
- .......i got it
- he likes PIE!!!!!!!!!
- and ice cream
- and of course brownies
- play the game
- or ill kill you
- c'mon hop to it
- or ill get michael jackson to see you
- if your over 12
- ill get your future cellmate
- his name is bubba
- I bet you two will have lots of fun
- your sister
[edit] dislikes
- lust
- rape
- anything about sexual harrasment
- you
- educational programing
- many many other things
- and more....
- including the grue
- water grues
- shadow grues
- russian frues
- other grues
- eurgs
- anti-grues
- you again
- ..........prepare to die
[edit] what else?
acording to the diagnostic the patiant suffers from severe personality and social issues. fantisizes about killing anyone or anything that acts on his dislikes. and goes against his intrests.
-dr.pchycosis
WTF?
YES, THIS is an average encounter with me.
You shall bow down, otherwise you will be Huffed.
[edit] The Country
“In Soviet Russia, tristmasterland is dictated by YOU!!”
~ Russian Reversal on Tristmasterland
Well the country is very intresting, you see. it involves Nazism,Kommunism,facism, imperialism,and ownageism. while this creates some instability, at least he shoots all capitalists. the population is so far about 5,000 due to misbehavior. although it's a well known fact that if you worship tristmaster, you will be forgiven 1 mortal sin, as well as 3 regular sins. best of all in tristmasterland, free biscuit fridays at popeye's chicken and biscuits has been moved tooooooooooo....................all week long. a move very popular with claveman. of course things such as mcdonalds, burgerking, wendy's, and arby's, are also prominant. so remember, obay and eat the food, and you live.EXTRA: now, with this special offer, get a house in Tristmasterland for 100,000,000,000,000,000,000$ cheaper. a house is now 100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000$. this special offer is only avaiable for the next 300 years,so call now, remember, in 300 years, duke nukem forever might finally come out(although most likely not) come out, so we have a reason to close the offer in celebration, or sadness. call now at 1-800-666-IPWNU, or log in at www.Tristmasterlandenslavement.com. WAIT, theres more, get a house now and we will give you on FREE copy of ZORK. thats right, a FREE copy of Zork. NO, not Zork 2, Zork 3, Or Zork 4. But the ORIGANAL Zork.(ordering Zork requires 19.99$ to pay for keeping the game on your computer, as well as tax, which is another 20.00$)SO ORDER NOW. GET A FREE CAR AS WELL. Tristmastermobiles are being made to keep the people moving around. as long as you don't press any buttons, you should be fine, or at least not dead. while your at it, get a FREE tristmasternought, the greatest battleship, err motorboat, to sail the seven seas.AND NOW, get a FREE Tristmasterjet. which can fly at 42,000,000,000,000,000,000 MPH.(be warned the jet has no brakes).
Tristmasterland
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| National Motto: "Obay Grues or we shoot you."
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| Official language
| bullet
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| Capital
| IPWNYU city
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Dictator
| Tristmaster(WHO THE FUCK DID YOU THINK IT WAS, HUH, SNAPPLE? I THINK NOT!)
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| Religion
| tristmasterism
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| Independence
| set since the begining of time. ha just joking i control everyone through mind control
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| Currency
| super smash bros. coins
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| National Anthem
| "Obay the great Tristmaster"
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| National Holiday
| Tristmaster day, Oscar Wilde day.
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| National Slogan
| I OWN YOUR ASS
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[edit] MY NINJASTARS AND AWARDS
no, i did not steal them. if they look like there stolen its becouse i'm a humerous person. and i try to change the text around a little bit for laughs.
| The Conclave of Doom: Fred Phelps, Ed Gein, Barack Obama, Benito Mussolini, Dick Cheney, Domo-kun, Adolf Hitler, Nancy Pelosi, Bert, Ł, Ronald Reagan, Oprah Winfrey, Satan, Enron, Grue, Margaret Thatcher, J. Robert Oppenheimer, Robert Mugabe, Fidel Castro, Dr. Evil, Benedict XVI
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| Comics Committee: Doctor Doom, Emperor Galactus of the World and Universe, Joker, Lex Luthor, The Scarecrow, Megatron, Mr. Freeze, Pikachu, The Riddler, Poison Ivy, Blackout the Vampire, Magneto, Venom, Dr. Robotnik, Jimmy Neutron, The Hobgoblin, Blackheart, Black Manta, Cobra Commander, The Makuta
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| Space Committee: Uncle Andross, Marvin the Martian, Chairman Drek, Darth Vader, Dr. Nefarious, John Travolta, Katie Holmes, Khan Noonien Singh, L. Ron Hubbard, The Irken Empire, Zim, Team Rocket, Xenu, CATS, Dalek Fred, Grievous, Robotic ghost pirates
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| Music/Theatre Committee: AFI, Abu Hamza, Andrew Lloyd Webber, Kevin Federline, Leonard Bernstein, Avril Lavigne, Paul Hindemith, Madonna, Phil Collins, Jimi Hendrix, Ron Jeremy, Hannah Montana, BBC, Gaahl, Peter North, Officer Ricky, Glen Benton, Green Day, Star Wars Kid, Blink-182
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| Politics Committee:Glenn Beck, Hillary Clinton, Bill Bennett, Mitt Romney Charles Montgomery Burns, Ted Kennedy, Chairman Mao, Hugo Chávez, Nelson Mandela, Kim Jong-Ill, CNN, Fox News, Imelda Marcos, Che Guevara, Joseph Stalin, Ian Paisley, John Kerry, Michael Moore, Sean Penn, Jon Stewart, Stephen Colbert, Ann Coulter, Rush Limbaugh, John McCain, Sarah Palin, Ralph Nader, Ku Klux Klan, Legion of Doom
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| Sports Committee: Al Davis, Joey Barton, Chel$ki Abramograd F.C., Kobe Bryant, Roger Clemens, Lewis Hamilton, Chris Benoit, Hulk Hogan, Rusty Wallace, Shaquille O'Neal, Hubert Horatio Humphrey, Vince McMahon, Sal Fasano, Ash Ketchum, Dwyane Wade, Yao Ming, Peyton Manning, Bo Jackson, Shawn Johnson, Michael Phelps, Juan Pablo Montoya, Michael Schumacher, New England Patriots
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| The Remaining Reprobates: Black Mage, Maozilla, Carlos Mencia, Bill Gates, Baby Seals, Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, Wikipedia, Hersheys, Santa Claus, Barney, Michelle Malkin, Erin Esurance, Jack Thompson, David Suzuki, Bea Arthur, Rikku, Paine, Evil Jesus
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One or more of the authors of this entry was terribly bored.
They may be afflicted with Attention Deficit... hey, we should go fly kites. That'd be so awesome! We haven't flown kites, since, like, summer. Hey, summer is when birds come out! Birds are so cool.
This article leads nowhere and otherwise tends to ramble.
This user has found Jesus and is therefore a potential threat to society.
