User:Triddle/M1126A Fryker

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search
M1126A Fryker

An Armored Combat Deep Fryer on location in Iraq. Notice the hot oil cannon on top; the lobes on the lower left and right are 5 horsepower electric motors to drive the oil pump.

The M1126A Fryker Armored Combat Deep Fryer is a modified M1126 Stryker capable of preparing the main course of a meal, under combat conditions, for 150 soldiers. Modifications include replacing the standard diesel engine with a turboshaft engine. This provides the additional power required to move the vehicle because of the weight of oil and the exhaust of the turbine is used to provide heat for cooking. Other modifications include replacing the cargo area with a large fry tank and a hot oil gun used to drain the oil tank and for defense.

edit Creation

The Armored Combat Deep Fryer concept was created by senior Bush Administration officials as an attempt to both increase morale for the troops in Iraq as well as increase recruiting effectiveness in the United States. Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld stated at a defense industry convention after a soldier watches their best friend get blown up by a roadside bomb, a little fried chicken is just the thing to help take their mind off their troubles.

edit Defense

The M1126A shares the same armament as the M1126 but adds a special high pressure and flow hot oil gun. If the need for defense arises the M1126A can spray the attacking squad with hot oil acting as an effective morale breaker. In an emergency situation the M1126A can also burn the frying oil in its turboshaft engines if the vehicle runs out of primary fuel. This can quadruple the range of the M1126A but any oil burned will result in lowered frying capacity until it is refilled.

edit Frying Unit

The Lycoming turbine engine (shared with the M1 Abrams) is able to bring the 1,200 gallons (4,500 liter) of oil to frying temp (350 F/170 C) in half an hour. Custom frying racks can hold 50 chickens, 8 pigs, or a whole cow split in half. The chickens can be cooked in 5 min, the pigs are cooked in 20 min, and the beef will be ready in 60 minutes. The hot oil gun will fully cook the enemy in 15 minutes.

edit See also

Personal tools