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This is my old userpage, dating from a few years back. It's a horrible, embarrassing mess, and it serves as a reminder of just how far someone can take their userpage and run it into the ground. Good thing I came to my senses before the page reached critical mass.
is my anti-drug
If you want to read Trar's Userpage, you must read The Copyright Disclaimer Fine Print first:(you don't have to)
Keep all guards and shields in place. Batteries not included. Offer void where prohibited by law. Allow 6-8 weeks for delivery. Do not light near face. Slippery when wet. Keep fingers and toes away from moving parts. Objects may be closer than they appear. Read and understand the owner's manual. Some assembly required. If you don't eat your meat, you can't have any pudding. The white zone is for loading and unloading only. Parental guidance advised. No user serviceable parts. Packaging may smother children. Keep left. Do not remove this tag. Hearing protection must be worn. May cause severe burns. Euphemisms are for the differently-brained. Not suitable for human consumption. Caveat nausem. It is forbidden to piss into the wind. Shuttlecraft should not exceed warp 7.5. May cause anal leakage. Management is not responsible for lost or stolen articles. You will not suffocate if elevator stalls. My cat's breath smells like cat food. Tighten belts monthly. Consult your doctor if symptoms persist. Don't stand, don't stand so, don't stand so close to me. Product may differ from illustration. Insert TAB A into SLOT B. Clean your room. This is not the luggage tag specified by the Geneva convention. Side effects may include mild to moderate death or coma. Prosecutors will be violated. Bridge out. This spot reserved for general manager. Tow away strictly enforced. High voltage - Do not open. Pie may be hot. Breaking seals voids warranty. Line forms here. Do not feed the trolls. Contains scenes of graphic violence, full-penetration sexuality, and fuzzy bunnies - Viewer discretion advised. May contain
testiclesnuts. If the wind changes, your face will be stuck like that. Do not apply to or near mucous membranes. Trucks must report when lights flashing. No refund on anally-fitted rodents. Check your weapons at the door. Political incorrectness is strictly encouraged. Remove before flight. This page intentionally left blank. Gusty winds may exist. WARNING! LARK'S VOMIT! May explode if inserted incorrectly. Causes ebola in cockroaches. You'll put somebody's eye out with that thing. Change filter bag when full. Don't look down. Fat chicks need love too. Check pattern buffer before operating transporter. Don't make me angry. . . You wouldn't like me when I'm angry. Start brain before engaging mouth. The doctor said you'd get fewer nosebleeds if you'd just keep your fingers out of there. Replace only with fuse of same type. Warp drive should not be engaged in space-dock. That's the one thing I could never stomach about Santa Carla: All the damn vampires. No one will notice this line. I am the one who all your base are belong to. Ho! Aha! Guard! Turn! Parry! Dodge! Spin! Ha! Thrust! Kingdom of Loathing! This template not for internal use.
| This user smells funny|
|This user may be Overly American. Brits may not understand his humor, only their humour. Don't change a thing to remedy this.|
|You have been cited in Uncyclopedian Bios.|
Apparently you are "notable".
Don't ask me why; I think you're lame.
|THIS USER DOES NOT NEED MORE COWBELL!
STOP STOP STOP NOW!
|THIS USER NEEDS MORE GROG!
GO GO GO NOW!
| Member of the Order of Uncyclopedia|
This person has successfully registered on Uncyclopedia. They
should be proud of themselves for making such a smart move.
|If you are offended by this article, consider testing out your new Stalking skill instead!|
Member of the Order
“Since Trar forgot to put up that warning poster, I will:”Template:Awilde
“Oooh...shiny colors and flashy pictures......”
“Seriously, what is that kid ON!?”
I grant Benson a full apology. However, I still don't like him.I am a strong Anti-Bensonite now. Watch out, Benson!”
“Trar, may the QuickVFD be with you.”
“Is time travel possible?”
“Trar has glasses.”
“DUH!!! I HATE YOU, JUST LIKE OSCAR WILDE!!!!”
“Oh, what a coincidence!”
“IT'S NO COINCIDENCE!”
“He is very angry at me!”
“He is most definitely CRIMETHINK. He is our greatest enemy, and must be vanquished!”
“I AM NOT CRIMETHINK!”
“I think that's enough quotes now.”
|What Trar Looks Like:|
|Real Name: Call me whatever you like.|
|Gender: MALE, BITCH!|
|Member since: 17:56, 26 December 2006 (we're not really sure though)|
|Weight/Mass: It's embarassing!|
|Favourite Article: No favorite have I. Okay, I admit, Nihilism is pretty close.|
|Least Favorite Uncyclopedia In-joke: None.|
|Weapon of Choice: Depending on the situation, it would have to be either a bad-ass quarter gun, a toy ray gun, or a battle rifle.|
|Insult Swordfighting Level: Huh? What's insult swordfighting???????|
| Favorite Game: |
|How Cool Is Trar?: Infinitely cooler than <insert name here>.|
| Infobox |
If you made it through all those templates and quotes, you're a trooper.
Welcome to Trar's Userpage!
I was M0000ARG11S, and not proud of it.
I have joined the The Grue Army, and you may now refer to me as
Sir(Braydie said i'm not a sir) Trar, Soldier of The Grue Army, Red Squadron
Oh yeah, I also play Kingdom of Loathing now. If you want to find me, my ID number is #1334618, I am a Turtle Tamer under the name Trar(that's my Internet alias), and no, i'm not selling you my fuckin' awesome custom outfit.
Curious about my custom outfit? If you want to see it THAT BAD, register a profile on KoL and try to find a player whose ID is #1334618 and whose username is Trar. That's me, and my custom outfit is listed on my profile page. Trust me, it's awesome! Don't worry, KoL is set up so you can't spend a huge amount of time on it(unless you're careful), and if you don't like it, your profile is deleted if it's inactive for 60 days.
^^^^Whoo! There! I hope you got the message!^^^^
I can even be found on Xbox Live. My Gamertag is, you guessed it, Trar!(oh i am so overreactive, aren't i?)
I've discovered IRC, and its wonderful magic abilities. Funny things can happen there, as seen in the following transcripts:
<UNKNOWNFILE> Carps <Trar> Are fish, and when hickory-smoked, taste good.
Every day, at least one person will be killed. Today a person has died by way of being sent to detention.
YES, I DID CREATE IT MYSELF!
edit The Story Of How Trar Came To Be!Trar "He Doesn't Have A Last Name" Sr. (or Jr., his birth files are actually hentai crap) was born on a 'whim', as most overused, cliched Uncyclopedia celebrities would say. His early childsh00d is blurry, so we'll skip that. (he probably was in planning.......muahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Trar once went to the beach, and after a severe sunburn, got BLOBS OF SALINE ALL OVER HIM! EWWWWW! (true story) (dear god kill me now, that was a link to a WIKIPEDIA ARTICLE!)
By introducing him to video games!
Also, Trar admits this biography sucks ass.
INTERMISSION-THIS ARTICLE IS BORING!
Pi is the mathematical version of a rebel. It is what a law-abiding rational number becomes on exposure to drugs, mass false propaganda and/or religion (which is not mutually exclusive to mass false propaganda). A long long time ago, in -300 AD (Also known as 300 BC where BC stands for Before Chickens) a hippie by the name of Euclid decided he should share some of his weed with the number 3. After smoking weed, 3 got high and become irrational. That was how Pi was born, which is 3.141.....
edit Controversy on the Origins of Pi
There are several conflicting alternative theories on the possible origins of Pi. Some of the more universally accepted ones include:
- In addition to 3.2, who is the child of 2 and 3(hence its last name is 2, => 3.2), Pi is the secret love-child of 3 and Inifinity. Hence Pi's last name is Infinity, 3.1415.... .
- Pi was the result of a failed cloning expert involving integers
- Pi was created by the CIA as an inside agent to watch over all the other irrationals
- Pi doesn't exist. It is merely a figment of our imaginations.
edit Questions answered by Mathematicians using Pi
- Why did the chicken cross the road?
To eat some Pi. Assuming the chicken is spherical, in a vacuum and eggs are conserved in the interaction.
- What is the answer to life, the universe and everything?
Pi.(It's not 42, the mice lied)
- Where is waldo?
At home, memorizing the digits of Pi
- What is the circumference of the observable universe?
A gazillion pies
edit Questions not answered using Pi
- What are the first N digits of Pi?
edit Pi and God
Mathematicians believe that God is actually an array of digits stored somewhere inside Pi. In other words, Pi > God.
edit How pi invented time
One day Pi was chilling pool side with his homies, smoking a blunt and discussing the finer points of fried chicken. Suddenly Pi said, "I would certainly like some fried chicken right now." But because time hadn't been invented yet he couldn't move his limbs. He could only move his mouth. So, with his mouth he started making clicking noises, using his tongue and the roof of his mouth. His homies asked him what he was doing and he explained, "I have just invented the first clock!" Suddenly they could all move their arms and legs and thoraxes so they stood up and walked away from the pool. They walked and walked and everywhere they went, time spread. Children who previously could only move their mouths were suddenly able to play and dance and sing. Eventually Pi and his homies arrived at their local fried chicken dispensary and ordered a bunch of chicken and enjoyed it.
We now return to our regularly scheduled jokes, already in progress....
Thus Trar is an expert THIS HAS BEEN CENSORED, B1TCH!!!!!!!!! HAVE A F*****G F1ELD DAY MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, but we don't know how.
And for his illegally owned pet Grue. If you see him, contact the cops IMMEDIATELY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Or the Queen Of Hearts. Or this guy, whichever comes first.
The following is a message from the local hippie group: We must save the Maine page!
Recently, Trar has broken his addiction to Cowbell.
edit Trar's Creations
(featued articles are in italics)
edit What Trar Likes
- Reading the block logs
- Editing and reading Uncyclopedia
- Reading Wikipedia (when I feel like doing research)
- Video games
- Lucky Charms!
- Mexican food
edit What Trar Dislikes
- His parents
- His brother
- 1337 5P34K
edit Happy Chairman Award
Recently, Trar has been giving this award out to users who contribute content that Trar finds funny.
Or just because Trar likes the recipent user.
edit My Userboxes
edit External Links
| Not Cream of the Crap|
This article is not and will not be one of the Top 10 articles of 2005, 2006, 2007, and beyond(ish).