User:Tompkins/page

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

< User:Tompkins
Revision as of 10:20, October 29, 2011 by Sockpuppet of an unregistered user (talk | contribs)

(diff) ← Older revision | Latest revision (diff) | Newer revision → (diff)
Jump to: navigation, search

Welcome to Uncyclopedia,

the content-free encyclopedia that anyone can edit.
31,170 articles in English

Beginner's Guide · The Big Five · Style · Questions · Help · Donations

Categories · Featured content · A–Z index

Tfa

PatHenry1

My name is Patrick Henry. I'm writing this myself. An outsider might leave out crucial events, important nuances, and valuable coupons. I can't have that.

I was born into an old Virginia family. The Henrys of Red Hill have always been tobacco-growers, rum-runners, revolutionaries, and high-handed bastards.

In 1685 my grandfather rode a piebald gelding into the British governor's sitting room, put the point of a sabre in the man's left nostril, and told him that unless he wanted a perforated brainpan he'd best quit quartering troops in the town. The governor commanded 10,000 soldiers but he buckled at the knees.

My grandfather later sent him a case of Cuban rum. The governor had it burned, and my grandfather never spoke to him again.

It was in the fertile shade of such family legends that I grew up. (more...)

Recently featured: Holocaust Tycoon - The Free World - Prog Rock - The Annual One-Day-Only Winter Holidays Earlybird 5:00 AM 99% Off Sale - UnBooks:Pulp Novel, the case of the dashing dame


Yfa

Holocausttycoon

Holocaust Tycoon is a simulation computer game, released for Windows XP in 2006. It was developed by Ka-tzetnik Enterprises in Berlin, and later released throughout Europe by WN Software. In Holocaust Tycoon, the player must successfully manage a camp, without going bankrupt, whilst avoiding the attention of invading Allied Forces.

The player begins with an empty plot of land, levelled and ready for development. In the early stages of the game, the player will build his camp, adding huts, arranging for political opponents, enemy aliens, specific ethnic or religious groups to be transported in, and the construction of torture chambers. As with most games of this genre the early development is the most important stage, as the structure of the camp is crucial to its survival. Controversially, players are encouraged to cram as many people into huts, to heighten profit (refered to in-game as 'death toll').

Eventually, as the camp develops, more options become availiable. For example, the player must then negotiate contracts with various loyal companies, such as gas providers and freight rail companies. The object of this game is to build an organised and brutal camp, allowing your Commandant promotion whilst gaining the love and appreciation of his Führer. (more...)

Dyk

*...that babies explode when you put them in the microwave?
  • ...that babies explode when you put them in the microwave?
  • ...that Alexander isn't really that Great?
  • ...that babies explode when you put them in the microwave?
Wotd
fabulous
Try to use it in conversation.
Knowledge is power.

Itn

Panda eats bamboo.jpg

Recent Second Front Pages: GreeceHillary!UK election

Otd

Dyslexic satan worshippers

August 30: Intentional Dyslexic Devil Worshipper day

  • 0 - devil worship is invented by emo lord Hebert.
  • 986 - A devil worshipper gets tricked into selling his soul to god.
  • 1585 - Devil worshippers are saved from being burned in the stake after the inquisitor concludes they were only cursing "dog"
  • 1992 - Devil worshippers are confused and name their religion the Church of Santa Ana.
  • 1994 - Eugene Victor Tombs begins his search for the horizon.
  • 1997 - Devil worshippers go to an apartment in New York for their pilgrimage to Stan.
  • 9199 - De vil foll woers f era KY2 com ptuer suh t down t o be teh end of a ll mnaknid. T om Cr uis e cure s Sa nat of his dysle xia thro ghu Sci en tolog y.
  • 2001 - Confused devil worshippers vandalize walls by spray painting 999 on them.
  • 2004 - Gorgoroth released their new album with Dyslexic Satan worshipping become the new subgenre called "Tarzanic Black Metal"
  • 2005 - A dyslexic devil worshipper sells his soul to Santa.
  • By 2010 it is projected that there will be over 900,000 dyslexic weevil dorshippers in the world.
  • By 2015 it is projected that 60% of all dyslexic devil worshippers will worship Santa, 30% will worship Stan, and 10% will worship Satin.
  • 3001 - The Answer to Life, The Universe, and Everything is discovered along with the question that it is the answer to. Simultaneous knowledge of both causes the Universe to vanish from existence, which is replaced by something even more bizarre.

Tfp

Gi-jew-movie

Template:FI/Gi-jew-movie.jpg

Image Credit: RadicalX
Edit Caption - Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images

Raa

Coca-Cola Classic | Sex change | FEMA | Bristol International Balloon Fiesta‎‎ | Ponytail | Atonality | Hercules | The Angry Video Game Nerd | Timur the Lame | Wasp | Gebhard Leberecht von Blücher | Colloquialism | Suit | Boeing 737 | Teleology | Sergei Eisenstein | Interstellar (movie) | Bee | Comcast | Green Party (UK) | Lily Savage | Microsoft PowerPoint | Warranty | Unicode | Hillsdale College | Frank Miller | United Kingdom general election, 2015 | Sault Ste. Marie | Metadata


More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about... | Stuck articles needing a push

Wanofm

Wotm

§ǚρωξλ£μĦΦφ≈€ƏξßÐÆØΞ wrote Double Ristretto Venti Half-Soy Nonfat Decaf Organic Chocolate Brownie Iced Vanilla Double-Shot Gingerbread Frappuccino Extra Hot With Foam Whipped Cream Upside Down Double Blended, One Sweet'N Low and One Nutrasweet, and Ice... (entry out of space)


Noobaward

In a closely fought battle Braydie pushed to the front of the crowd to win this month's NOTM award. A dogged reporter for UnNews, Braydie has brought us all the latest on such varied topics as Restricted Artists, Computer Abuse as well as articles such as VFH nominated HowTo:Make a Band. Not a bad start, but can he do this? {insert random gesture}


    Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners: 2005, 2006.1,     2006.2 Clock is ticking! There's only one more day to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month, GET VOTING!!

Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects.
UnNews Logo Potato (No text) UnNews
The news source on crack
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia
Undictionary Logo Text Undictionary
The ick!tionary of all things best left unsaid
UnTunes2 UnTunes
Where noisy things can live and prosper
Game-Logo notext Games
Another way to waste time
Gorillatrans HowTo
Instructions and guides for anything and everything
Unbooks-logo notext UnBooks
Content-free books
Unquotable-logo-en vector notext Unquotable
Useless misquotes galore
Uncycloversity-logo-notext Uncycloversity
If it makes sense, we don't want it
UnPoetialogo UnPoetia
Poetry for people who hate poetry
Undebate logo UnDebate
Debating all the irrelevant issues
UnScripts UnScripts
We can ruin stage and film too
Why Why?
Don't make me explain it to you twice
UnReviewsLogo UnReviews
We'll tell you why things suck
Uncyclomedia Commons notext UnCommons
Broken media repository


Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 31,170 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext
Uncyclopedia
English
United Kingdom
W17x11 30557
Desciclopédia
Português
Brazil
45286
アンサイクロペディア
日本語
Japan
18180
Nonsensopedia
Polski
Poland
W17x11 16666
Nonciclopedia
Italiano
Italy
W17x11 13518
Wiki it
1dÉ
Désencyclopédie
Français
France
W17x11 8364
Inciclopedia
Español
Spain
W17x11 10392
偽基百科
正體中文
Taiwan
5720
Uncyclopedia.de
Deutsch
Germany
W17x11 Unknown
Hikipedia
Suomi
Finland
7614
Hikipedia
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on September 3, 2014.

Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and an elite clan of Clinjas.

Personal tools
projects