User:Tokimasa

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The Dishes Aht The Windah Act (DATW) of 2000 legally empowered a person or persons living in a multiple person dwelling to create and enforce a timeline in which dishes should be washed. In the opinion of many, this act enabled numerous dishes to be washed or be disposed of that otherwise would have remained in the sink for weeks, if not months. The removal of dirty dishes from the sink is a key to maintaining a healthy kitchen.

Creation of the Law

The law originated in the Oakland section of Pittsburgh, where many students attending the University of Pittsburgh and Carnegie Mellon University live. A young man had neglected his dish-washing duties for two weeks, at which time his roommate told him he had three days to wash the dishes, or else said dishes would be thrown out the window. Three days passed, and the dishes still had not been washed, so they were subsequently throw out of a nearby window, crashing onto the lawn below. It is not known how many dishes were involved in the original incident.

Because the situation was hardly unique to that dwelling, a grassroots movement was created to bring the law to the City of Pittsburgh, and, after much campaigning, it was enacted as a local ordinance by then Pittsburgh Mayor Tom Murphy.

Due to the heavy Pittsburgh accent the roommate has, some poetic licence was used in the law's name, and, indeed, many would argue it is an intrinsic part of the law's charm.

Procedure

In order to enact the DATW ultimatum, first one must allow dirty dishes to accumlate and sit in the kitchen sink for a period of at least two (2) weeks. Any time after the two week period has passed, the issuer of the ultimatum (complainant) may verbally issue the DATW. As soon as the DATW has been spoken in its entirety, the clock starts immediately and the non-washer of dishes must either wash the dishes and put them away, or, when exactly seventy-two hours has elapsed, the complainant may throw the dishes out the window.

Weaknesses of the Law

Once the law was enacted, two primary weaknesses were discoved in it. The first was that the law only applies to dirty dishes that are in the kitchen sink, and it does not apply to dirty dishes anywhere else. This weakness was exploited by The Jared Android, who, with its positronic brain capable of hundreds of computations a second, realized that it could simply take the dirty dishes and hide them in a cupboard that was too high off the ground for his complaining roommate, Detective Mrvos, to see.

The other weakness is that the law cannot be applied with the same ease in every dwelling. Some dwellings do not have a window that is conveniently located near the sink, whereas others have a window that somehow makes it hard to toss dishes through it, e.g. a small window, or one that is blocked in such a way that righties have difficulty projecting dishes through them. These weaknesses were not addressed prior to the end of the Murphy administration.

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