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Now, if only I had one for the green rainbow party.....

Shoeonhead This user is a member of the Green Rainbow Party
...we're bound to win something eventually...


Messages Go Here


Hello, TheLedBalloon/Archives1, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for nooblets:

If you read anything at all, make it the above two links. If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, try these:

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button (Button sig) above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Dump, or add the following: {{help}} to this page along with a message and someone will come along and help you if they can. Again, welcome!  -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb (talk to me)


Just because I feel like being nice, I'll give you a hint: you might want to check the code of the page around the heading of "your" section, and investigate the template you find there... --Strange (but) Untrue  Whhhy?Whut?How? *Back from the dead* 08:27, 13 April 2007 (UTC)

  • Oh, okay........

I apologize for my mental retardation..... it comes in bursts........

Don't worry about it - everyone falls victim to the USERNAME template at least once. And sometimes more than once too! --Strange (but) Untrue  Whhhy?Whut?How? *Back from the dead* 15:28, 13 April 2007 (UTC)

Just kidding, Messages actually go Here

Cajek has been adopted!

That was awesome how you helped me there. I'll make improvements to Side effects over time, and I hope you can help me with that. I added the Adoptee template like you requested, master. --Cajek 06:05, 7 July 2007 (UTC)


Consider yourself adopted! :0)

I'll read your articles as soon as I can, and give you any tips I have....any other immediate help you need? ~Jewriken.GIF 13:10, 16 April 2007 (UTC)

Not that I can think of yet, but usually I'll run into an issue with formatting or something by the end of the day or so. Thanks for the adoption! The Man Of Led 15:57, 16 April 2007 (UTC)
Okay, just noticed soemthing I need help with: Redirects. A couple of times my friends haven't been able to get to one of my articles because they didn't capitalize a letter, or something stupid like that. I checked the code, but how do you make mis-types redirect to your page? The Man Of Led 02:58, 17 April 2007 (UTC)

Whichever is comfortable to you let's say from now on that I answer questions asked on my talk page on my talk page. As for the question: If you have a misspelling, you can move the entire article to a new name using the MOVE tab at the top of the page. Make sure that you don't create double redirects at the process (that's a redirect page that redirects to another redirect page, very annoying). You do that by checking "What links here" on the left side menu before moving, and if you see any redirect page that is linked - you'll have to remove it after the moving, you can do that by listing in on QVFD stating that's it's a double redirect. As for simple capitalization issues etc, you create a new page and then write:

#redirect [[article name]]. and that will create a proper redirect page.~Jewriken.GIF 11:23, 18 April 2007 (UTC)

Does it matter where I put that, just anywhere in the article, or in the title somewhere? The Man Of Led 15:58, 18 April 2007 (UTC)
Just use the first line.~Jewriken.GIF 16:47, 18 April 2007 (UTC)

OK, thanks! The Man Of Led 16:50, 18 April 2007 (UTC)

Baby Snatching Poster

I've done a rough cut of this for you ... think it would be nice to follow the suggestion re. child's hadprint, but that would involve some creation from scratch which is do-able, but only if you like the idea. Before I make this for you, do think about the text, as there is a lot of stuff you could incorporate, and it is your baby after all. --Asahatter (annoy) 21:49, 6 May 2007 (UTC)

You Fool!!! Messages Here!!!


Newcookie Trar has awarded you a cookie!
Now go play in traffic.

I'm giving out cookies. Hope you appreciate it. --Trar (talk|contribs|grueslayer) Mchammer 23:59, 6 May 2007 (UTC)


Thank You

Freeze, evil-doer!!!
Black &amp; White Cookies
You have be
some black an
For voting on The 
en awarded
d white cookies
Black And White Man
Now sing along: “Ebony, Ivory, living in perfect harmony!”

--herr doktor needsAbrain Rocket [scream!] 04:18, 7 May 2007 (UTC)

...And thanks again!

You know what? Just put messages wherever the hell you want


Halfcookie User:Ljlego has awarded you half of a cookie!
Now go play in traffic.

For voting for Hodgepodge. Maybe, if we try hard enough, next time we'll get it up and you'll get a full cookie. If you want to help, vote for the new VFH in the sig.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 14:14, 13 May 2007 (UTC)

About your question

The answer was archived with the rest of my creepy talk page. Look up at archive four...~Jewriken.GIF 21:09, 13 May 2007 (UTC)


Weasel3689 would like to thank you for
Lord of the Flies.

Weasels Rule!

Weasel Weasel 3689Sucrose b Colombia icon 06:05, 18 May 2007 (UTC)

Hmmm, yummy, I rub my tummy!

Pumpkin pie Herr Doktor has awarded you a pumpkin pie!
For voting on Gallows Humor

"With your stamina refilled, time to work!"

-- herr doktor needsAbrain Rocket [scream!] 18:24, 23 May 2007 (UTC)

On Baby-snatching

I posted the following reply to your comments on the Pee Review, but then realized that perhaps you would not see it there. So I'm copying it here. This is very, very good for a first article. Mine were much worse. The horrible thing is that humor is subjective, so you never can get a definitive answer to "what makes writing funny?" questions. All you can do is try to find your way. Twisting something in a way that is both clever and unexpected seems to be popular. This kind of thing: "If all the girls who attended the Yale prom were laid end to end, I wouldn't be a bit surprised." (Dorothy Parker) There are other techniques. Many suggestions are listed on Uncyclopedia:How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid, and I expiated 13 sins from my mortal role by adding the Prolixipaedia Manual of Comedic Writing to the database. (Only 398,128,254 sins left to go.) Hopefully most of the writing techniques listed in these articles are useful. Technique usually only works in the service of the Angel of Inspiration, though. The trick for many writers seems to be to keep plugging away until the darned finicky Angel sees fit to stop eating bon-bons in Fiction Heaven and pay you a visit. Which, as you say, is a lot of work. ----OEJ 11:45, 24 May 2007 (UTC)


Much appreciated! :) --THINKER 04:26, 27 May 2007 (UTC)

Thanks for reviewing

I hearby award you this template

GoldenShower Rejoice, TheLedBalloon! You have been entitled to the
Golden Shower Award
For donating high quality material to the Pee Review.

and thank you for your help. I'll fix the sentences, and revert that most recent piece of vandalism. (I hope you didn't see that, that was horrible). Thanks for your time! Oh, and, that 3rd person banter was mainly because I have done so many god-forsaken Pokemon articles, and I am annoyed at having to continue to write another so that no more gay joke articles need be huffed. Maybe I should calrify it... Thanks so much Fresh Stain Serq Fet of Pokemon (At your service)


I'm having a little trouble coming up with good captions. I know the potential is there, but I can't find the right words. Suggestions? And thanks again for reviewing my article. --Señor DiZtheGreat Cuba flag large CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 15:19, 2 June 2007 (UTC)


Thanks for the vote of confidence in my reviewing. I'll try to get to [[User:TheLedBalloon/Pae_Do]] -- I read the mainspace version of the article some time ago, I think, and it's a good concept. But I haven't looked at the version you've got in your namespace. I have to go down to work (on my day orf!) so, depending on how soon you read this, it may be some time before I get back to Uncyc. ----OEJ 13:45, 10 June 2007 (UTC)


Hey there francis, just wanted to know what is and not those. Just needed seventy new ones by that day. Don't ask it. He bites. Good job breaking up with me, I'm ready for new lands. Aren't you the guy who hit me in the part? It isn't yesterday. --Fonchezzz 18:41, 13 June 2007 (UTC)

Thanks, buddy

Thanks a Bundle
Alfred Thanks for voting for Mad TV. Not that it was stressing me out. What, me worry? SNL32NEWLOGO
Whoops. Wrong logo.

Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 20:36, 13 June 2007 (UTC)



Mr. Kearsy so cool, he doesn't have to say anything in order to thank you. Just look into his eyes and you'll know.

I always got stuck with crappy Mrs. Walker myself. ;) Thanks man!! --THINKER 06:47, 15 June 2007 (UTC)

Thanks a bajoodle!

thank you!


...could not think of a creative "thank you" template for voting for HowTo:Turn Your Computer On. But thanks for voting anyway.

--THE 12:13, 18 June 2007 (UTC)


Great job!, Take a look at how you did on your article: Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/UnNews:Host of NBC's "To Catch a Predator" arrested for attempted rape of a minor. --Sir Manforman CUN 21:46, 19 June 2007 (UTC)

Pae Do

Your rewrite of the article looks fine. It's hard to write a piece on demand, even if the demander is the redoubtable Famine. Nice job. ----OEJ 22:33, 19 June 2007 (UTC)

Thanks for all your help! P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 22:47, 19 June 2007 (UTC)

BB thanks thee!


Thanks again! -- Big_Brother_Sig_Part_1.pngCUN PLS VFH (MiniluvMinitrueUnsoc) 11:15, 20 June 2007 (UTC)

Thank you...

For reviewing UnNews:Wikipedia will merge with Uncyclopedia. I worked on it a bit, want to re-review it? Also, I nominated myself for User:Tom mayfair/Uncyclopedia:User Page of the Month/ It's a great user page, will you vote for me? Thanks! --Sir Manforman CUN 18:13, 21 June 2007 (UTC)

  • Thanks for voting! --Sir Manforman CUN 18:46, 21 June 2007 (UTC)


For including yourself in this amazing omnibus of a voting.. thing.. anyway, thanks. ;) --THINKER 07:21, 22 June 2007 (UTC)

You're welcome

In response to your thanks on IRC regarding my breaking the tie. I would have said this on IRC, but my internet connection conveniently crashed. Sorry about that. --THE 00:02, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

No problem, thanks again for voting! You'll get a lovely little "thank you" cookie soon enough. P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 00:07, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

Thanks for the vote!

But, I know the Worst 100 Pick-Up Lines of All Time list won't get featured. It has -2 votes right now. I doubt (m)any of them even actually looked at the list and before they voted against. People here don't like lists. They suck. I wished I had some sort of reward for you. I don't. Sucks for you... Thanks anyway! --Dexter111344 05:50, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

Just kidding! I gave you a cookie. --Dexter111344 05:58, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

Thanks Dex! P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 13:45, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

Welcome to UnNews

You've been immortalized on audio... well, your story has. Congrats and Cheers! Zimbuddha Rev. Zim (Talk) Get saved! 02:10, 26 June 2007 (UTC)

Che Ape

Reverend Zim_ulator says: "There are coffee cup stains on this copy, damnit! Now that's good UnJournalism."

Welcome to UnNews, TheLedBalloon, and thank you for contributing some crap, or otherwise attracting my attention. For a quick introduction about how you can write a decent or better UnNews article, please take a minute read our spiffy new Style Guide.

I am your humble servant (in your dreams), and if I may be of help to you, please leave me a note on my talk page.

Good things that can happen to you

You can win awards and prizes! You can become a better writer by subjecting your articles to the scrutiny of UnNews critique machine or UnCanninator shit article detection system. You can become a thorn in the side of Journalism as a whole. You can get promotions, ribbons, and free crockery! You can write stuff your mom would be ashamed to show her friends.

What happened to my article?

If you've submitted an article, and it's disappeared, I may have mercy-moved it to your user space. This means I've probably left a message on your talk page, likely in close proximity to this very message, explaining why.

Your article may have been tagged for ICU if it has significant problems meeting our criteria, or I may have deleted it because you did not register as a user.

Finally, maybe you just pissed me off. I mean, I know I'm a Roshi, and I'm supposed to be all "Zen" about everything, but I have bad days too, you know?

UnNews Audio

If you are interested in doing an UnNews audio, check this out.

UnNews UnFunnies

At present, I create UnCartoons for UnNews all by my onesies, for better or worse. Now, I will never claim that I am a good cartoonist. Fortunately, the internet provides us a way to do all sorts of things simply and easily. I found, a great site to create cartoons with a minimum of talent.

This document is an ongoing effort by me to enhance the obfuscation coefficient of Uncyclopedia; productive changes, and criticism are welcome. Cheers! The Right and Left Reverend Major Sir Zimbuddha Rev. Zim (Talk) Get saved! 17:38, March 28, 2010 (UTC) Zimbuddha Rev. Zim (Talk) Get saved! 02:10, 26 June 2007 (UTC)
It pleases zim to know you approve of his audio "work". Thanks for your kind words, and I will let Famine know. Cheers! Zimbuddha Rev. Zim (Talk) Get saved! 13:25, 26 June 2007 (UTC)

Just In Case You See The Game Come Alive


SpacerSpacerPremierTomMayfairChe RedPhone Unsoc Hammer and sickle03:16, 26 June 2007

Wiki Survey

Thanks so much for completing my survey! Sutton4019 10:19, 28 June 2007 (UTC)


Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 23:49, 28 June 2007 (UTC)

Sorry about the mix-up

For the undue stress it may have caused you, here's my little way of saying don't sue sorry about that:

Newcookie User:Ljlego has awarded you a cookie!
Now go play in traffic.

Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 00:41, 29 June 2007 (UTC)

Topic Name

RAHB 06:42, 29 June 2007 (UTC)

You sir...

...have inspired me with the name bywhich you call yourself. Viola: The Red Balloon Dame PPsigPPlips.gifGUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 22:33, 1 July 2007 (UTC)

Pen Island/Side effects review

Hey now, hold on. I did NOT say that it "sucked", in fact it's okay... really. I'm just so tired of penis jokes. Here's your chance at revenge: Uncyclopedia:Pee_Review/Side_effects

--Cajek 18:10, 3 July 2007 (UTC)

Oh man, why'd you have to be so nice about it? :) I really don't know what to say about it. I really don't. I just came on the scene, so I'm a bit confused. I was actually kinda hoping you WOULD take revenge, because I would like feedback: even if it's just a plain review.

--Cajek 18:48, 3 July 2007 (UTC)

Well, maybe I will do the review, but not for a little while, I'm kinda busy right now. But, you know how I was talking about those really good reviews? There's this guy, One-eyed Jack, who writes the best reviews around. Really long, but if you do what he tells you, you could wind up with a feature. P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 18:54, 3 July 2007 (UTC)


To tell you the truth, you didn't need me for a long time now, I just enjoyed having you popping in every now and then...:) You're doing great! Keep up the good work and storm the hall of shame!

~Jewriken.GIF 21:06, 3 July 2007 (UTC)

Cool, thanks for believing in me! P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 21:08, 3 July 2007 (UTC)


Yeah, I'm afraid that I did think it was libellous, because (being a Brit - sorry) I have seen much lesser things taken to court. If you read it as an average person, you would almost think it was a real report (and I did, because I don't know who the guy is and I wasn't sure if it was vandal work or real).

You have to remember that people 'Google/search' certain names on the internet, but don't know if they find a real site or a humourous site like Uncyclopedia. If you had started it with something nonsensical it would have been seen as being humorous, but I thought it was near the knuckle. If someone wrote an article about TheLedBalloon being a member of a terrorist organisation and a confirmed paedophile (because it has been proven without a shadow of a doubt) then how would you react?

I know everybody here knows we are only having fun, but the boys in the black suits out there look for these things to drag sites like uncyclopedia into the mud, and the courts. I could say the Queen of England looks like the abstract daughter of Picasso's imagination, but if I said she ordered Diana to be murdered, then that is something entirely different.

I don't wish to be pedantic about this because I wish you the best, and I really do. --Andreasegde 22:47, 3 July 2007 (UTC)


Leoispotter has awarded you a helmet!

Now you can bash your head against a brick wall safely and in style!

-- Phlegm Leoispotter * (garble! jank!) 15:32, 4 July 2007 (UTC)

re: help

Ooh, awesome! I'll consider your very generous offer, Led. What could help me is if you helped out my article Side effects: I see you wrote a featured one. Thanks again, man. I hope I don't seem ungrateful or anything... --Cajek 14:36, 5 July 2007 (UTC)


Hello TheLedBalloon/Archives1. Forgot about you for a few weeks? Well, I have started The Get Bush in Jail Petition (There's a link to it in my sig). You don't have to sign it, only if you hate George Bush. Also, unfortunatley, my user page lost User:Tom mayfair/Uncyclopedia:User Page of the Month. Fortunatley, I renominated it and I'd appreciate a vote for you. Thanks!--Sir Manforman CUN 23:06, 5 July 2007 (UTC)

Well, thanks then. Right-o

Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 13:01, 7 July 2007 (UTC)

Be Careful, Young Grasshopper

Vote links in your signature will sometimes work against you. If you have the patience to look through my sig history, I had one of those once. It didn't work for me, and I'm positive it turned people off of voting for me. You can keep it if you wish, but fair warning, it gets tiresome to people after a while.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 15:38, 7 July 2007 (UTC)

Frankly, Ljlego, I was thinking the same thing myself. I think it makes me look "needy." P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 16:15, 7 July 2007 (UTC)
That it does. I always love the ubiquitous "contribs" link. That's why I don't have it.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 16:18, 7 July 2007 (UTC)

You're welcome

I'm glad I could be of assistance. And I can definitely relate to being too lazy to properly finish things. It happens to me all the tim --THE 13:04, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

Thank You

Magnifying Glass Sonic80 has awarded you a magnifying glass of which you, too, may use to get thousands of dollars, in government subsidies for insect torture research.

-- --Mgr. Sir Sonic80 16:40, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

Led, could you do me a favor?

Could you nominate Side effects for VFH? I don't know how to and I would feel silly. Get back to me, buuuuddy. I'll be watching your talkpage. --Cajek 21:02, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

I will gladly nom that page, but first, you have to do a little more work on it. First, really try to scrap a bunch of the items on the lists. Trust me, I know it's hard, but you gotta do it, as many a page gets voted down for being "too listy." Also, for the same reason, add an intro to each list. The longer and funnier each intro, the less listy and more Feature-worthy it will become. I'm working on a list myself, right now, called Phrases_spoken_before_death. I'm not adding new items anyomre. What I'm doing, is trying to make it so that there is more paragraph content before each list. Now, this may be an unreasonable goal, but the point is to have a lot of intro-type stuff, and not a lot of list content. P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 22:41, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

Could you give that a try? I don't think it's possible to write funny intros for most of the lists on there. Also, it's called "side effects", so probably people will be expecting lists don't you think? It's been reviewed 3 times, and the last one got a 47/50. --Cajek 23:03, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

Alright, I'll give it a try, but you don't mind if I deplete some of the lists, do you? I'll try to leave the Colbert one especially intact, but I'll try to add a bit of an intro to some of the lists. They may or may not be good, but we'll see ;). P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 23:27, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

Cool, but could you review it first beforehand? Follow the links on my talk page, man. Thanks a billion --Cajek 23:29, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

lol, sure. P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 23:31, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

That's a lot of favors for one little balloon, no matter how handsome and clever he/she is. --Cajek 23:36, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

He. And thank you very much. ^_^ P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 23:39, 8 July 2007 (UTC)


Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 19:54, 12 July 2007 (UTC)

Gut Check!